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I ■ THE.. 

GOLDEN SPi 

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■ 1 N T H fi 

Courts oi EU RO P E 



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.. ^* THE 

OR, A 

PoLiTicAi. Journal 

OF THE 

Brkifi Nights Entertammentr 

WAR and PEACE. 

AND 

LOVE and POLITICS: 

Wherein are laid open. 

The Secret Miraculous Power and 
Progrefs of Go l p, in the ^ 

, Courts of Eurof^i 



Inteimix'd with : 9 -. sCj 

Deligjitful I N T R i<^ u E s» Mem d ^^ie^ 
Tales, and Adventures, Serious 
and Comical. { 

LONDON: 

Printed for 7- WotJmardin SuCiiriftophr^i Church- 
jardf Thrt/id'needle-firett \ and J. Moephtw near 
SMtioiferi-haUf M DCCIX. 



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THE 

Epiftle Nuncupatory, 

TOT HE . 

A U T H O R ^ 

OF 

A TALE of a TV 3. 

SIR, 

THis Jddrefs is not to let you know that 
the Author fent the following Sheets tp 
vifit the World at the frequent Importunity 0/ 
learned and witty Friends; or to explain tp 
you the drift and Aefign of the Prefent I fend 
youy for indeed if is purely to follow the Mode \ 
for there is^ Sir^you know^ a Fajhion in Booksj 
4s well ^ in DrejfeSy and to be out of it in 
either y gives afi til Grace to the Perfon or the 
Book : And my Author having fent me his Copy 
without infer iking it to any living Creature^ 
andyou^ Siry having engrofs^d Prince Pofteri- 
A 3 ty, 

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Tothe AUTHOR of 

, ItPOfofraidj thsP fhou^dmyBookbt outof 
the Fajbion of An Epifile Dedia^ary^ in an Age 
Jo prodigal to Flattery y it i»Ottd hok Co naked 
and hare J as to fright all the modijb Buyers^ 
whom I always de^e to he my hefi Cufiomers ; 
fince a plaujible Title P^ge (^the Bookfellers 
Jrt) and a goodGiit Back^ feldomfail to 
fleafe them. . 

, ^ing therefore C4me t0 this RefoluUon^ m^ 
0ext4imc0ltj/ wdstoffida Patron. I had in* 
deed a very long Deihate in my j elf tphofe Flag 
to Advance J under whofe Banner to enter the 
Bat^i of Criticksy a formidable Qeneration^ 
thai h^ve no mare Mercy than Hunger ^ Ne^ 
€e$ty^ Of a derg^-mat^s Revenge. I looked 
over the Catalogue ef all my Cuftomersj df 
WhiteV Chocolate Houfc, Tom'i and Wilr^ 
Cpflfes-faQufe ^and the TemjjJe, to fay no^ 
thim of my City Chaps, whojbmetimes deal 
in Wit y and are as terribU Cnticks as any 
6J the former : Nor did I negle£f the confide^ 
ration of t^e Ladies^ but corned not find on^ of 
'Ml my Roll fit for -my furfoji. For^ faid /, 
hom can Wit ever hope jof a Patron among 
[thofe v^^ho fubfi;ribe fo prof ufely for Nonsense' ; 
0r Art find a Friend xpbere Ignorance and Im-: 
fudent Preteffce are, received ^ or that Sa^r 
poud pleafe the Piquet and Back gammon 
P%^r/ (?fCovent-Garden ; or that Cook up- 
on Littleton fbou'd defend the Belle Railery ; 
Or that the Ladies wou^d be favourable to a 
Man that can produce A^ WitnefTes, whenthiy 
' 4ref^ fond of Eunuchs that have none ? 

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A Tale Of a Tub. 
CoMfidering therefore that Wit Wdi Bd^ 
mfo^d the Court J the Great Mem^j Studiesj smL 
the Ladies Ck^ts\ the Chocokte^houfe, steJL 
Playhoufe, wy oid AequaimMee Mr. Britaia 
the Smallcod Mam made me turn my Eyes 
towards Clerken-wcll Greea far Refkge; 
hofingj that the Neighbourhood of the Bear- 
Garden, tphere now are the mofi uatural 
Judges of Wit, wou^d afford the befi Patroms. 

^is truty had J fr^d om the imemom 
Mr. Britain, Peofle wot^d have tboe^t^ 
that I might have foui^ a difficulty in Jome 
of the laudable Topics of Dedication; as tk^ 
Ancient Famil)^, and known Generoficy rf 
the Patron ; yet to jbew them their mifiake^ 
I froteft f$ncereljy that had not the leafi in^ 
fluence on my reje^ing his Patronage^ fince I do " 
not at all doubt^ but that I might have ffoke 
as much Truth on both Heads^ ns gtmraUy 
has been ff 6km by mofl of our Modern Dedi^ 
€ators\ (Vho often run the Pedigree of their 
Patrons up to the Conc^^y (aM we are be* 
holden to them that they flop there ) th(? »tr^ 
haps they wou^d be puzJe/themfilves to tell their 
Forefathersin the Pious Days of good J^eenBt{s; 
tho\ it may be^ the frJi\of them^ that made 
any Figure y Wi» only a Court Pimpi or faf 
vqurite Valet de C|ianibre cf fome^ antiquated 
Ladjfy whcfe jalacious diftemper made him ^ 
Gentleman, fy getting hm a Placey in whichy 
by Cheating the Queen and Country y he might " 
raife an EJlatfy and leofw bis Pofierity the 
A 4 ^///r 



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10 tTO A 1/ 1 n u R or 
•T/z/a pf Eight Honourable* ibr a^ that 
S-^e/DonxL inA Udy Father^ Pope Pius th9 
^£0^4^ judicim/fy ohjerves^ Pew Great Fami- 
lies have had a very, honourable RiJfet 
Befides J Poets ^nd other Dedicating Au^ 
thors CAn make Pedigrees^ as mli y as aaj 
Heraldy German^ or Welfliman e?/ them 
alL His ixery Name w^d hofve afforded 
manf pregHMt Gonje^ures i» his Favour ^ 
For fever d Perfons eminent in their Stations 
have hrn it; -vphich in the Memory of our 
JFatherSy ha* hem thought fufficient to make 
idd RoMA^Ns of fome honefi Saxons, 
mever heard of iti me World till thefe< later 
days. ^As^ firfiy Mrs. JBritain. has been a 
JLady wery ujeful in her Generation , md 
^Jmnif^^d the Quality with many a Maidf^ 
bead hath Real and JrtifciaL Nor has thi^ 
Name been unkndvon. in the Kjngiom of the 
3eaux, and Gallants;' and^ if^w r^ou^d fur^ 
fue the Advantages of the Name to its An- 
tifuityj Horn eafre a. matter wou^d it be ta 
make .ip as ancient as the NaUon it jelj ? 
J^'fo mth a little of our Modstn Amhois 
-Addrefs in fne Panegyric , I might have 
deriv'^d^ if from old Bvut^ and^ the Trojans ; 
tho* that perhaps I might h^n^e left to Mr^ 
Samms, .and the rejl of the.mofi profound 
and Learned Antiquaries of thir Nation^ efper 
§ialJy to Geofry of Monmouth, and about a 
Thailand Welm Manufcripts. Bait if all this 
had not been fujficient to vanquijb his Mo-? 
dcfty, and mak^ km^ quite forget his Small- 
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A Tale of a Tnii 

cdil Bagg^ / toi^J^ have told him^ th4t in 
fiom Times of. Yore, 4 great while ago in-- 
deedj and a great way offj before the barbarous , 
UundMion of Goths, Vandals, and Lorn- 
bardS) Men were diftinguijh'^d from the Mob 
only by their Virtue ^ their Valour^ or Kjtow^ 
ledge, or ExceHence in fome Science or Art; 
f^d have^ frov^d it by a Latin Rotation: 

Nobilitas fola eft atq; unica Virtue 

7ho^ that ferhafs might have been looked 
on as A Satyr on the Quality of thefe Times\ 
end by the High^flTcrs, for a rank fiece of 
Repyi>Ucan Motive. 

Thus with nmch eafe I cou^d ka^ve fro* 
claimed the Wonders of his Generofttyy effe-» 
^aiy to Men of. Art ; a Virtue Jo uncommon 
in this frepnt Jge^ that a FidlQV JhaS dram 
Hundreds, ojr^ of the- Pur fe of a Lord^ 
who woi^d not give Sixpence to aU the Senfe 
of M^nkii^d \ and when the Nohkmtn^s Va* 
lets r4*tf Brokerage /or Dcdicatioas* 

Purely therefore to avoid the Imputation 
of 4'Alaligner- of. our Men of Qiiality, I 
laid aS thoughts of adireffing to Mr. Britain 
"^fide , and cafi rny Eyes on you ^ Sir^ who 
being perfe^ly, unknown for your Quality, 
or Virtues to the World^ mu^d not adinini-^, 
fter Matter ^f' Envy or Abufe on my prefent 
4ddrefs: Bejjdes^ Sir^ to you All manner (f 

Tales 



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Td the AUTHOR of 
Tales Uy a claim mofi fecuUar. Tm bA ^ 
Ddme of Tales to the Town^ whuh jet it 
not WMTj of following the Humour. The 
Arabian and Turkifli Tales wre oming to 
your Tale of a Tub ; Jnd the lafi wasl. 
MiimipA into the Prefs by the eminent Book- 
feller of the Wits , and Chairman of aa 
eminent a Clui : The Devil on two Sticks, 
and mam more Ejufdem feraginis: Nay^ 
€V4n ELiKories ^ having long been a fort cf 
Tales of fo many Tubs , eafily pafs^d on 
the Town for your Froiu3ions. Buty Sir^ 
one of the chief Motives of this Addrefs 4^ 
yoMy is thnt the World might be /enfibUy that 
I have too much Modefy ( tho^ a Bookfeller]) 
to palm the following Treatife ufon you \ 
7 he he^Bth of wy Jmbition being to fensL 
it abroad under the advmti^m Cirsumr 
fiames of yowt Patronage: For the? I C0$f4 
never fnd Jbat a LordV Title or Name 
to the Dedication , fold iw« a Book^ or 
excused the Dulnrfs of my Author; yet Jf 
am in Hofes thi^ yours will do bo^; fined 
I have f^M many a Blockhead /^ for # 




fronounci 

has riis^d a Refutation^ that Nature tuyer 

defign^d. 

BefideSy SiTj at a Time when all the Fine 
Arts are fo vifihly dijcoura^d by both the 
'Great, Vulgar^ and^tbe SjnutU ; when thefirfi 

• ' have 



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A Tale of a TtiB* 

iMve run down Poetry mJtVli^sfor BaUads 

Mi Operas ; v^hen tm Utter from a Z^d of 

Reforming of I know not what, hA$ not 

only fuff rep d. the AntkntYzxx of St. Bartho-r 

lomew, ^ that we may fooner expe£t to fee 

there A B3nner, thsn a Pinkethman ; whem 

the more Modern Fair <?/ May, ahI thxt Ce- 

lekrsted one of Greengoofe, Are Reformed of 

aU their OrnAments as^ fomAny Popifh Cere- 

joionies, to tt^greAt dec Ay of the Confumftiom 

^f ^^SS ^^ I^rk, And Greeiigeeie; when 

the Noble And Antient Aft of RMe-Danciag 

i$ aimofi Aholijb^d as Anacbrifrian, hecAuJe 

the Rnpambuli were offenfwe to one of the 

PlAys of 0//i Terence 1 thefoor RenmAnts 

of thefe nimble Arti/h leing Jor^d to find $ 

HtffiTAhie RjesreAt At Sadlers Wells, where 

Mrs. Bufhel jbms her Plumf Thighs to the 

-Steber Saints, their Pious Wtves And DMghr 

tersy And hopeful Toung Sons tooy without (ht 

leAfi feAr of Scandal. When the FAcetious 

Jack-puddings Are filenc^d for feAr of Pro- 

^faane 'Wit, ' or forced to content themfelves 

with A Mountebanks Stage, to "Joke off their 

PiBsj Potionsy And PUtjlerSy to the detri* 

tnent of mAny An Honefty tho^ Credulous Cit. 

H^en the Ingenious Puppet Shows fuffer a 

gremer Perjecution in this LAnd of Liberty 

And Moderation, thAn once they did Among 

the Wife And Religious Switzers, who zcat 

hufly burnt a MAprof a Puppet Show /or 

deAUng with the Devil ; from whence^^ osut 

Godly And Wi^ Reformers, hm^e ever ftnce 

tAken 



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Tathe AtJTHaRof 

taken it for\ a moft Diabolical Ealserteki-; 
ment^ When the Spirit of Hypocrify tiimf 
at Reforming us info Solitude^ by Politisdlfy 
dejtroying all Pablick Meetings and Recrea^ 
tions; atleafij when theyhaix^e left no place free 
for our Diver [ton but the Markett of French 
Commodities^ the Taverns; arUwhen nobocLy 
is like to be fuffer'^d to thrive but Vintners, 
Viduallers , Juilices Clerks , Reforming 
Conftables, and Informers ; for G&dlimfs 
is now not only a Gain but a Trade, for tphich 
J^n quit their old Emplaynknts ^s lefs Be* 
neficial,. and ferve theirand in Reforming : 
When Ufurcrs, Extortioners, ji«jr,.Debo- 
chees and Drunkards, PioxiJIy Jet up for en* 
Urging- thte Kingdom ot Heaven j and 
while that thy ferve the Old Gentleman in 
Black in dU the d^eds of their Lives ^. are 
Canonia'd by the Pulpit Gentleman in Biack 
for their Ks4 ^g^i^fi Common Di*^, and 
Demolijbing Puppet Shows. 

At a Time^I fay^ when -all thfedn^tAtts 
lie under fuch a Preffure^ what fitter Patrcm 
cou^d I choofij than the Darling of^ fo Jtl- 
dicious i«/?rf Pious an A^e,'^ who have difio% 
ver^d fo pectdidr ^.Geflious in Merry Tm^- 
yLiNG^ as coud never w/mt Succefe ; when 
to Write Serious, is to be Dull ; and to Think 
Rationally, to he Pedantigk and Enthufr- 
aftick. 1 confefsy that there have -fome other 
Worthy Gentlemen appeared of iMey who hofU^ 



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^mrmfmAffy J^lem t6$s Whimrical wat^ 
amOBg i^ich our new Philofophioal Tranfadi- 
om are M, Mafier piece in fheir Kjnd^ ^efpeciaSj 
thejhttkors Facetious and IVinyEngiiih Epi- 
grams in a; Greek Chara£fer. The Tatler 
has likemfe lately taken uf this Taking 
Mode, and crept like the Fops of the Times 
imo the Clofet of the Great and the Fair, kf 
A Modiih Impertinence j fo that if a Peace' 
jQjou'd comey Iknorvnoty but out of excefs of 
Jojy we may not endure any thing hut Tat- 
LEKS theje Ten years to come ; which might 
pw;e as furpriz^ing to your good Prince^ ro- 
fterity, as our Military advantages over the 
French Bully ; for vie do now in Writing as 
in Building ; if Light and Gaudy, V/i no 
matter ^twLafting ; and^ indeed^ it is but 
dealing fakly jw>/r Pofterity to leave them the 
hiberty of building their own Houfes, and 
writing their own Books, according to their 
osrn Whiles. 

Buty Siry thefe are both far {hort of your 
Excellence, and meer Imitators of in 3 hefor-^ 
Tner redicules only meer Humane Jrts and 
Sciences ; while Yqu,' 5/r, go farther y and 
Burlefque Religion it felf ; while fpeaking and 
thinking of it in a Good Humour, you have 
brought it to be no more than m Old Coat^ 
leavtng . to the Qopd Friend honefi Moderate 
Martin, fcarce fo mwh as a Lappet ^o 
coruer i^/i Nakedneft. ^ Tou have indeed done 

greater 



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ffrr^rrr fwonMrs m) iU}ncroverae-g^ mgt 
uay (rf Wafwick|OBeWs of Sout^mtxw^ 
dr Amidi$ of Gauly w the ferformances of 
Chivalry. ff%#7^ Stinirigaeet, Tillotfon^ 
^nd th other Champions of our Caufi^ have 
brought rphoie Armies of Authorities mi 
Reajons again fi the Whore of BABYLoaii,. 
jou mth a Joke confute the Ohfiinate fieUar* 
tttixie 4ffd John Catvin a once, and hjn/e 
iertainlj dijiover^d the Shorceft way with 

CoNTROVfiHSYi 

Tesj Sirf Tou put me iti mind of the Merry 
Fhilo/opher Democritus, p^ho thought the 
World only tportjf Laughing atk And per* 
hdps you may he in the Right on^t iphen you 
fee every thing turned Topfide Turkey ( ds 
they fay ) When Divines turn buffoons j 
Sharpers turn Cullies ; Men of Quality turn 
Sharpers j Irifhmen turn Wits ; Layers 
turn Arbritrators ; Tallymen ^w^ Paun* 
brokei^ turn Reformers ; Whiggs turn 
Tories J and Tories turn Whiggs ; Non- ] 
jurers tufn zealous defenders of the Revolu- 
tion ; Polititians (urn Gamefters ; and^ 
Coblers turn Pojlititians. 

Were I the Author I jhould here teU you 

Wonders of /A^ Book / Dedicite to you -^ 

T*4ir like Homer, accordim to the Criticks^ 

it contains all Arts and Sciences; but 

ffeaking for another^ IjhaU let Urn fbtjt for 

hirm^ 



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«Hi^ fmj fftformt0g JRMT, Tha m the next 
mMw^ tM mB fad Wonders indeed per- 
formed ty Gold, fiiek ss veu^d furfrim 
n^n a Prijest at a Courtier ; who Mre^j^ 
werMfff fe wB Acquainted ftith its Vdue sni 
ftree, Jndfo, Sir^ I Snbfiriben^ Jelfy 



Tour 

Humble Servaae, the 

BOOKSELLER. 



THE 



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THE 






■ i-n I h a ■ I a 




B^ INTRODUCTION; or.Tbc 
lUrfi Nights Entertainment. 

MONG the many great Advanta-^' 
tes we have of thofe v^ho groan un- 
[er the Tyranny of the Inquifitiof?^ 
that of the' Liberty of PhilofopHizing;, 
,ind miking free and noble Enquiries into the 
hidden Secrets of Nature, is i^otthe leaft va-^ 
luable ; fince by that the modern Times and 
morpfree Nations have made many and in- 
tftimable Difcoveries, which have been both 
ufeful aftd entertaining to the World. Put 
it was the ill-Fite of CarnPanelU^ who feems to 
have had a peculiar Genius this way, to be' 
born ft Subje^ of thofe Princes who with a^ 
great deal ot ill Policy fuffer a Tribunal ii> 
their Dominions, that denies any dependance 
On them: PorCampme/Uwas thrown into the 
Inquifition f<ft- -Writing of things that were 
above the Underftanding of an ignorant Age, 
incj ftiore igdorant People* 

JB N<ne 



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None of his Writings ever pleasM me toorie 
tlian his Book de Senju Rer/im, which made 
me often wiih that Chance or Induftry might 
furnifh me with fome Experiment , that 
might with (uffident evidence confirm his 
Speculations. But when my Endeavours 
had pcovM fruitlefs, and ail my Enquiries had 
left me not the leaft Light into my Defires, 
Chance fupplyM one beyond Controverfie, 
and which firoducM an Inflance not only of 
the Senfibilny df Things which we generally^ 
''eem mute but inanimate, but ev*n 
tionality, and difcourfive Faculty, 
1, Memory, and Refle£lion. Of 
i was fome Pieces of coin'd Gold, 
le had thrown into my Hands, 
! Conver&tion I leara'd many Se- 
icy. and LOve, part of which I fliatt 
relate, the reft I fhall referve for a more pri- 
vate Conference. I confefs this Adventure^ in 
a more Superflitious Country and Perfon, 
might have pafs'd for a firlt-rate Miracle ; 
but here, where Enquiries into Nature difco> 
ver eVy day fuch vTonders, and with me who 
have read of the Soul of the IVorld, and Ma- 
xinis that hold ev'ry part of the Unrverfe to 
becomposM of animal fenfible, and perhaps 
rational Particles, the Wonder rofe not a- 
bove the Power of the Opera^bns of the fc- 
cnet courfe of Nature. 

W ere it not a receiv'd Maxim,that nothing 
is more Powerful than Gold, in Waf, and 
Peace j in Courts, and Camps ; in Church, 
and State,^ with the Great and we Fairj yet 

«ur 



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our prefect feeing and feeling of this. TrutH iri 
the ^ench Management were fufBcient to &• 
ftablifh it. For% this they have made all 
^rope tremble, and raisM Ftmc^ to that 
height of Empire,^hich She has obtained, and 
yet ftrugffles to preferve, with a Force almoft 
cgual to the reft of the World. I have indeed 
often thought wliat noble and diverting Difco- 
Veries might be made^ could any of the Lottis 
J^re^s or Uuiaeas reveal by difcourfe what Af- 
feirs they have negotiated, and thofe fecret 
Intrigues, which have producM ftrange and 
terrible Effefts in Kingdoms, and Families;. 
But whilft I thought thefe Reflexions but 
vain Amufemeats, as I lay awake one Nieht, 
I was agreeably furprizM with a proof of their 
Solidity. I heard an odd fort of humming 
noife like one ftrugling to fpeak, or not awake 
dflough to give his Words their true Articula- 
tion ; this was the more alarming, by being 
juft under my Pillow, or fomewhere aboui: 
the Head of my Bed ; yet I wa 
iniaginine this to be any Ghoft. 
6r Fantafm of the Night,that I fi 
Rc^ue had privately got into n 
and hid himfelf till he found t^s ^ ^ 
in the Night to accompiifh his Ends in Rob- 
bery or Murtter. Leaping therefore from 
my Bed, I calFd for my Servant, who coming 
with a Light, fearch'd e'ry place with all ima - 
ginabk Oire and Exacbneis; but finding no- 
uiing, I kept the Lights and bid him r^jtire to 
iiisKefb 

B 2 I 



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I was no fooner laid down again, but 1 
heard the fame ruffling Noife, but it feem'd 
ftronger than before, and direftly undqf my 
Pillow, where yet I could find nothing but 
my Breeches, and in my Pockets a few Louis 
cTOres zndGui/^edSywim{omeDufch^Spdni/By 
and odd Italiapf pieces of Gold^ which my Cu^ 
riofity that day had prevail'd with me to pur- 
chafe. Confciousof my wonted Fate, which 
would never let me fleep while I had any Mor 
ney in my Pocket, I took them all out and 
laid them on a little Table juft by my Bed- 
fide; fecure now of Repofe, I found aD quiet 
about me, and the Noiferemoy'dtothe very 
place where I laid all! my Gold. But that 
which now added to my Surprize was, that I 
plainly perceived, that the former Noifc began 
to allume a Tone extreamly like that of the 
Humane Voice, arriving at laft to a Murmur- 
ing Articulation, Ibme broken words of which 
reached my Ears, and feem'd to come from a 
Perfon juft breaking from a profound fleep,and 
yet not confcious enough of Reafon to make 
Senfeof what he utter'd. 

The' I am not naturally Superfl:itious, or 
very Credulous of Apparitions, yet the fruit- 
lefs fearch that I had juft m^de, having fatis- 
iy M me that I was my felf the only vifiWe li- 
ving Creature in the Room,I found within me 
a Concern, of \\^-liich, (till then) I thought my 
felf incapable. But reflefting, in the midft of 
my Fear^that this could be no Spirit of Dark- 
V^eis^ finceit venturdinto the Light, I grew 
-tnore cci i^agious^iin which I was confirmed 

by 



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• ^^Tbe IntrddUtHion. 5 

^>y feveral Pious ancl Religious Confiderations 
which arc pfopef and ufeful on fuchOccafions. 
Drawing therefore afide lAy Curtain,! direft- 
ed my Eye by the guidance of my Ear to the* 
very Place wnence this Sound feem'd toarife; 
but my wonder encreasM when I difcover'd 
nothing in Sight, but whatus'd to be there, 
( except my Gold ) which, tho' of feveral In- 
tcrefts and Countrys, I could not but fuppofe 
would lie together without quarreling, 

I had heard; and Experience had taught 
me, that Gold would make the Silent fpeak, 
and the Loquacious dumb ; but I little fufpe- 
fted that any of that Metal could fhake off 
that natural dumbnefs which the Opinion of 
the World had fo long fix'd upon it. But I 
had not gazM long e're I found to the contrary 
the iame Sounds were renewed, and I plainly 
heard a fmall Voice among the Gold , which 
ftruck me with an Amazement not to be ex- 

Srefs'd ; and yet it was an Amazement, tliat 
ruck more on my Curiofity than my Fear j 
for I immediately fnatch'd up the neareft 
piece to me, which happen'd to be a Sftanijh 
Pifide^ and clapt \t to my Ear, and ask'd it 
many Queftions ; but all in vain, For it re- 
ttiainM as fullenly filent, as if it had nomoro 
power to fpeak than the World generally 
imagines. 

On the top of the Heap lay a hzM Leuis 
Jl^Orey which obferving my uneafie Curiofi- 
ty, with.a true French Brisknefe familiarly 
callM to me, and bid me no^give my f<;l( iu 
tibour fo vain, as to lofe my Tiirie in fol- 
• • " ' B J ' Jiciting 

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6 The GoL;9^;N'Sp%r. 

Uciting tli€ Dumb to fpeak> (incc of alldiat 
Heap He (for after what pafsM b^ixtusl 
may, with the Grammarians leave/ calHtfft) 
only could yet a while comply with my De- 
fires. 'Tistruc (continuM hejfome of thefe 
have had the Power of Specfch, but by profti- 
tuting that Faculty, have for a time, quijte loft 
it ; but that the reft neither ever: had or ever; 
would en joy that Prerogative* Imyfelfhav^ 
now for fome time ( purfuM my ; talkative 
Monf.) been ftrugling to recover a Power, of 
which I have tong been deprived, and jUftlii^ 
the reftji to roufe them from tmr Joiig ana 
drowfie fit of dumbnefs, but have not yet 
been able to prevail. 

This Declaration of my dapper piece, gave 
me full fatisfaftion about the odd Noife that 
had given me fo ^uch difturbance, wlxich ytt 
I thought amply rewarded by fo wondenui 
a difcovery. In fhort (purfuM he) I will not 
trouble my felf any longer with my dull lan- 
guid Companions ; but fince we are in this 5^ 
Iitude,witliout any Witnefs, Iflialladdtefemy 
felf wholly to you. Tranfported withfocn-i 
gaging an affurance, I took him up iH mf 
Hand, gave him a tboufand kiffes, atjdtHig^ 
ging him clofe iamy Bofom, full of P|®:furea^ 
great as if I had got the beautiful CMLIA vd 
my Arms — r» Go on^ (faid I) my Ck^mtr^ f^. 
pUj And hlejs me mtha Converfatitmyfp/iichji^^^ 
Ho fk'h^^evjer fnjofd before I Why arin thou/pMt 
my adorUi Whyioft (Hqu delay thofejoy^^ ^*^ 

' ■ [' -■^'. ' '■'•'■'■' '■'■' - ^ 

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M.UC j^ VH^T ttnu i fvvcfs VI wjuv* y 

It was a confiderable time eVe he would 
▼oucbfaf^ to utter one Word, which threw 
sneintoa very painful Fear that he had loft 
that happy Facuity,whieh,Ifottnd by his Cbn- 
feflioh, was not always in his Power. In the 
midftof my impatient Expectation, now al- 
mo^ in defpair, he b^an again to fpeak, but 
in a much weaker, and a vxt of upbraiding 
Tone, which made me (cnnethin^ 'unea'de. 
laskM him, however, the reafon ofa Oiange 
ibfudden; and thebttedCaufeof a Silence, 
t found my felf unable to endure. 

You your felf (feid he, fomething angrily) 
are the duly Caufc, >rho by your fond Actions 
and CareflJps, fecm to Coniefs the Mifer, a 
Creature to whom we have the utmoft aver- 
fion ; his Love is as troublefome to us, as odi- 
ous to an the World bjsfides; for, ihutupia 
las Coffers, we lofe this agreeablie Quality, 
which is only mantsun'd by an abfoljite Free- 
dom of circulating with the Sun about the 
World, where we make far greater Difco- 
veries than that glorious Planet ; for we are 
jadmitted to thofe Secrets which are induftri- 
oufly conceai'd from his enquiring Eye ; and 
made Confidants of thofe Intrigues pf Love 
^nd Politicks, which he would only diftppoint 
or deftroy. Whether we go in Bribes to tame 
trouUefome Zeal of the VAtri<^ ; to betray the 
^tatefmms Truft ; Or purchafc the Honour 
and Chaftity of the Matron or Virgin ; lor 
we, like the Ikge Vlyffes, accomplilh moft pf 
p^ grcat:^ Exploits in the dark, 

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I I affurM him, that Curiofity alone I^a^ be-» 

tray'd me into the odiou^i Sufpipion of a Giiiljj, 

of/whichl had theutmbft Abhorrence, Avar 

jice being a Vice the mbfl: remote of any from 

my Nature* . I begg'4 him therefore, by hi? 

'^opes of perpetual Liberty, to proceed withr 

<)ut any/uch I?ear, and fatisfie me in thole a4r 

'mlrajble Secrets of |iis BfTence, which it feems 

' wer^^^ the Cpmmon. Qpj- 

jiion,., , , . > : . ' - 

. . P?9ifyM with thefe repeated Affuranqes, res- 

Turning his Courage, he thus again ^>egaxi ; ; 

' Iwulnot entertain you with an Account 

of the Generation of this Metal in the JSowels 

of the Earth, both becaiife that aflPords but 

little Diverfion to ai^y buta prpfefs'd Virtuor 

fo, and becaufe. owing my Origin to another 

fCaiiie, I am little acquainted with that^ter- 

Ifene Gold b)^ which you fonn your tdea of 

'the whole Kind. T, Sir, am part of that fa- 

jnous Golde;i Shpw^r^ difguisM in which Jufiter 

penetrated the ftrong Brazep Tower, to pof^ 

fefs tlie Charms of the beautiful Dami^ which 

Story to look on as a mecr Fable, favours too 

^rnuch . of a Modern Incredulity ; fince, ever 

Tmce that rime,jpu find that there is no place 

|b'fl:ro;ig^ or guarded with that Vigilance, to 

'which G£?/ifl{ will not gain Admittance an^ 

bnng to a Suri;.ender fooncr, and with morp 

SaTety, than'the'Battef i^of Cannon, mdtKp 

Valour of Heraes. 1 cerif^fe (cpntinu'ld he) all 

IGoldis^not of this nature', as willbe plaip 

froih^an Inf^ance which I, will jpr^^^ ^ly^ 

you, ' But airth^''G<^7iiWtltat SlibwVfSeV^^^^ 

>•. -•*' '■'••' > *■ ,* -: ' ^ • •■ \Xz 



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Irrcfiftible. This is plain from daily Exjicri^ 
jeiice; for if We only look into the AflaitS of 
I^ove, wefhall findfome Lovers ata yaft tx^ 
pende; without being able to obtaiii the l^ft 
JFavour of their Miftreffes ; whilft others with 
a little of this j and a tolerable Addrefs,eafily 
^^|:imo their Arms,in Ipight of all the w^tcte 
fill Eyesof llusbands ,aiid Spies nfcver fail- 
ing togaijrt the ftrongeft FortJ if tliey volichr 
fate but to fet down before it. This Truth I 
ihall convince you of^ in a Story of a certain 
ILady who had me oncein her PoflefliOin, is 
foon as I have premis •<! a jfhort Account of my 
4elf,.^nd the various Tt^nfmigrations I havt 
pafs'djby that Means to remove your Incre- 
dulity or Doubts of whatever I Ihall rieveaJ. 

• Sinccf I came down fromHeav'nih thatyfei»pV 
' ,|vith Jovey I have had multitudes of Maftersl 
4nd SMbiapcs j5iU as various. Much Time I hait>^r 

rt in the Service ofthe Ladies ; have been 
Ornaments of the Swords and Wea- 
|K)ns of ancient Heroes and modern Generals, 
i^nd perfedly know what thbfe acquirM by 
.their Valour^nd thefe by their Mpney^ I can 
f cU you theii* Conduft and Government, fhow 
yqU t^e Art of rifinc: in the Camp without 
y alou^ 6t Senle, andall the dark My ftcries of 
l^sbaidinga War to Years,that might be de^ 
rided in a few Months. I have been lock\l up 
in rthe. Cabinets of Princes, great Kings^and 
mt^y Emperors, and am perfeftly acquain-^ 
ied with thweir moft.fecret Intrigues, private 
Vices, and Follies. I have belongM to feve* 
ifU erc4t PoIiticians,FaYOuri^es andCour^er^ 
;^i'i^. ''' ^ • . . . i ■' -* - ' ' and 

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aodknow aH their Principles and Maxims. I 
bflvt been too often, in the Cbfiers of the 
Clergy, and man^r times in their &udies and 
Cioias, which has bifou^ht me throughly ae> 
quainted with their Vicious Inclinations, If- 
religion,Hypocrific, Cruelty, Ambition, Ava- 
rice, and Pride. I have likewife ador n*d the 
Pingers of the greateft Favourities, Male an4 
Female, feen all their Bribes, toJd over the 
Friceof the EKtortionaiui Jlobberiesthey harve 
committed, and feen the ^lijtnder of Nations 
jCramM^nto their j«ivat© Coffers. I know 
the caufe of the Fall of SeimttSy that great K*- 
^M Favourite, and could give them all fudi 
good Advice, as might fecure them from the 
UkeFate. 

From the Courtiers I cafily 'pa&'d to the . 
Gamefters; thofe,jtho* pWer luch Scoundrels * 
J)Y Birth and Part$,arc admitted to the Tabtef 
ofLords and Princes: nay, this very one thing 
\a& brought the Lacquey from behind his 
Lords Chair,to the Table with him. And die 
Oftler from rubbing; the Horfes Heels, into the 
Bed with a Dutchefs. The Metamorphof^ 
of this Myftery are greater than lAio'kotOvU ; 
for here Footmen, Porters, Butchers, Tap- 
fters,BQwl-Rubbers are transfbrm'd into Gen- 
tlemen, an4 Companions for Minifters of 
State, and Princes themfclves"; and on the 0^ 
ther hand, Lords, Knights,, aiid Squires intA 
Scoundrels, excluded thel Converihtion of thi^ 
Chambermaid ; Porter^j l*imps under Shar- 
pers, Setters, and the like. I have belongM to 
J'imps and Bawds o£ aU'NJitions, and €now. 

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lbeTO0ermiJfr<gre}f(iJ}JOJ.V». ii 

die Ceaxt Amours of aU die Great Men,^«i^ 
they carefs i|lfe Beauty in their Arms, as they 
do felfe Merit in their Favour in their Polls, 
thavefeenthemorofe fo\vVMini(terof State 
hug the rotten Remains of footmen and Por- 
ters under the ^^ious Nam^ of Virgins and 
)Citizcns Wives ; and the Matrons of QpalitVj 
'when they haVe'been infendble of the Adre(- 
fes of Wit, and Accomplilhmehts of Perlon 
and Qualificatibns, meh iuxurioufly in the 
hiftic Embraces of Brawny Coachmen, and 
/Tinkers. I have feen the ^fe Modefty hide 
6er Face in puUic at a double Entire, yet 
riot in falacious Enjoymefits in her Clofet* 
Jn my Travels thro' Eaglmd I have riot efcap'd 
the Gripe ofthe GoMjy wl^e I have made no« 
Wble Difcoveries of theic Hypocriiie; for while 
their Pretences would raife them awe Men, 
their Pra^icelays them lower than the Wick- 
^nefs of Devils : ^r indeed, they endeavour 
\o ksiti better than moft Men, tp get it intoi 
their power to be ipore abandfuiM ^naH 
Men. Ilie canting Reformei^'who bufil/ 
pretends to alt^ th^ courfe or Nature, and 
lend the poor Whores to BrideweS, I have feen 
reeking in Adultery withhis own Ne^hbouri 
Wife, Others' who have IbokM onapinto^ 
Wihe in a Taviern as s^h unpardonable Pro&n«^ 
tlonpf the Lord VDay, I ^ve feen get Drunll 
In th^irown Houfes^to the Edilgcation of thc| 
Godiy; I i^ve if^n others tliat have with ar 
Gogle bf Deteftatidii damn'd aU the Fratltyi tif 
iSIature and Youth> fwallow the Eftates ot Wi- 
do^vs ^d Orphaiis yf]f^ ;hot-e &iSii^n a Glafa 

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11 ^ i'te iJ ox D EN b p r. 

of Whitcwine, and Bitter ih z Morning, with-^ 
bnt'thelieaft reniorleful'^eck of ConfcienccI 
and then by th6 Tti1)itHi txanflated to 

ISdji^er^s Saints £W7/3gi?/»i^-Kf/?, wi^ 
^cftitution to the poor fuffer in^ Vi^iipis. Tlie 
Stock-jobbers I have been throughly acquain- 
|jed.with,and know all the flights arid qunning 
of their Tricks, aijd ill the'familiar Cheats of 
the hoijeft Traders of the City/' - 

' I can tell you the Scandal and Impertinence 
erf the Ladies Vifiting-days \ the Machinations^ 
of ail the political 3[«^'^<?^ • for I have been of 
aDParties^and Famons, and am perfefl-Iy aC^ 
(pialntied with alltheir Rogueries ; their mani 
iPr^ehces to the Gbdd of the Public^ to bubble 
the People into their nieafufes,' for their own 
j^rfer^e intereft and Advantage. I can let *em* 
int^ tlSi^tct&ioi Hi^'-Church and Lmv-Churchl 
and jpoint'out all the Fools and Tools that ma-* 
hage and are managed by the Demagogues of 
each.' I cahfhew you a Scene of tne ufefu! 
boBors^Commons^ where Proftofs without Re- 
ligion exclaim on the Danger 6f tlie Church. 
I can iirfprm yduin the Art of niakiiie a *^4 
Caiife go^d^ before ^ J^dgd that wei^s the 
Merit of Plaintiff and Defendant -by ounces of 
Gcfldjiiot Witheffes bfR:ight. I cantfeachyou 
the Ait «)f ^ bribing Parliaments aiKJ public' A(^ 
feniblkSy who^drunk'witlvthii JuhmpaPabile^ 
diftrribogue- thte Rights- of > th^^ People- while 
riiey VOtc^giiteftArbit^rff^oVei^, knd Bbaft 

- As I'haVe had fuch - ^aVfcu^^ traiifrfiigrations 
thrp' the'g4?6at^l^<]^Jd5 ^have I t^ken a flioif 
':^ turi\ 

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%trw to its Miniatured 5^4^^. I koew all. 
the Intrigue? of theLaclies of that RomantiQ 
ll^6n j"^ their wonderful Gonftancy, exa£i Fi- 
d^y^ and uncommoa^jcnerofity : . I've been- 
Witaefe of the Vk>pk(n Felicity of their X-oyeK, 
ftee from the Anxieties oS Riyah- I have div'd 
into the Myfteries of the Management of that 
politic State ; for they^ like the greater World, 
conceal Self-intereft and Injuftice under the 
fpedious Name of Arc ma Imperii., I can give 
yoH the Charafters of their Heroes ^ their Ho- 
nour, Capacity, Judgment, and Knowledg in 
the Art they profefs ; their Juftice to each oUier 
and to the Poets; their illuftrious Birth and 
learned Education, by which they are qualified 
for fiich great Pofts as they frequently enjoy. 
Ihave likewife been oonvcrfant with the ]^sjd%- 
dom of Sofd^dsy the Opera^s; can tell you a|l 
their wife Subfcribers^ with their Merits and 
Charaders. I can paint in as lively Colours as 
they ufe, the bright Female SongHers and the as- 
famous neither Male nor Femde Singers^ There 
I have feen a ^n?/>Jti Trumpeter paft for a great 
Matter of Mufic, and Eunuchs palm on the 
Town Grimace, and Aftion for Harmony and 
Voice. And tho* thefe may feem Trifles not 
worth your hearing, yet lince the Fools pf 
figure liave given them the Air of Impor- 
tance, they may perhaps afford you variety 
ofDiverfion. 

From thefe two Fairy Orbs I have fometimes 
efcapM to the Pockets of the Poets, with whom, 
tho^ my ftay was generally very Ihort, yet tlicy 
being Men without Difguife or Defign, I can 

draw 



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<iniw jaa a perfcft Scheme of tbcir Virtuej/ 
Capacities, Lee^ntng and Genius. 

In ibort, Sir, I have been in every &atim of 

life, from the Pt4j»ee to the Fufrnty and cai\ 

tjnfbld all the Myfteries of Iniquity, that inall 

Nations lave always enrichM Knaves,impos'd 

- Ofi Fools, and baffled Men of Senfe.^ 

" I have frequently pafs*d the Chymijl'is Fur- 
hace,and beentortur'd for the Alchymift'sPro-^ 
je^ion ; bate feen the Bid>l>les who fpent their 
prefent Fortune for a future Chymera. I have 
alfo many titties paisM the Phyikian's Hands 
in the form di a Fee, and lb am perfediy ac- 
quainted M4th the SkiH and Method of the Fa>. 
ctdty in France in r^;ard of the P*tie»tmd 
the Jpotheeary, 

But, to come to aA«nd, Sir, I am theeld^ 
Sonof T/w^, and mayjufUyfay, that I know 
the TfanQi£aons in all the Climates of Eurofe^ 
andAgesof the Wodd, in War and Peace, in 
Love and Politicks. 

Having thus given you AifBcient Proof of 
my Experience and Knowledg, I hope what I 
have to fay will find aperfed Belief ; for a^ 
fure your felf. Sir, I am not fo fond of talking;, 
as to throw away my Words where I meet 
%vith any Doubts of my Veracity. 

My Itttle Piece here {Kiufii^ a while, I gave 
him all the aflurance imaginable oi a Mind 
ready to receive, as Verities undoubted, all he 
had to tell me. Pleas'd vmh what I laid, aiid 
iJie manner of my uttering it, he immediately 
went on to the Story ; which was, to prove 
the different Force of this Gdd, of Heavenlv 

birtli 



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birth from that which was drawn from ^ 
Bowels of the Earth. 

The Smy of Qfimt Guido^ Bernardo, and 
3)omut l^ancha. 

Count G^/Vfo ((aid he) was of the City of 
F*mi in Italy ; his Father was a Gentle- 
man of a good Family, yet, according to die 
Cuftom of the Bdia» NobUity, he icrupl'd not 
to imj^ove his Fwtune by Traffic. But Ava- 
rice growing on him with his Age. and his> 
Wealth finding an abundant encreafe, he be- 
Came lb doating a Lover of his Mony, that he 
nevtf durft tnift it out of his fight : So livihg 
OKtft miferable, he died moft odious and con- 
temn'd. His Son in the mean while (the Sub* 
Ve6k of our prefect Difcour&) with a iraall Al« 
Jowance rais'd himfelf by his Valour arid FartP 
ia the Emperw^s Service, to the Dignity of a 
Count of the Empire : But his Patter's Death 
Jbon recalled him from the rugged purfuit of 
Glory in the Field of il^»-^, to make a m<Mie 
co^iderable figure in that <» bright yiutm. He 
came hom«e tl^efore from the Can^raign: to 
take pofiie0ioa of Riches fi> immenl^ as fiitt 
very ieldom to the ftiare of any one Man. 

A krge Eftate was tJbe m& part of his 
Wealth ; Ibr.the Sums he found hoarded upin 
his Coffers and other iecret places, were fuffi- 
cient to have purchas'd him an Jtglian Pi-ioci- 
fMity. But thefe heaps of Treafure having 
been fecluded from the Light (b many Years, 
the young Count had the misifortunc eitlwr to 

have 



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have none of his lucky Gold I have mentioWj 
dt ks Vertue was loft by faloi^ a confinement^ 

The Count was of a <guite contrary temper. 
10 his Father, being natu^Hy as profufc as thh 
Other was niggardly: IJd immediately let up 
a magnificent Equipage, and wanting a Palace 
fit for his reception, he refolv'd to pull dowi^ 
the old Houfe of his Faither, and ered a no- 
ble Pile,anfwerable to the Riches he wa^ n(K\r 
Mafter of, defigning in the mean while to tra- 
vel, and IhoW fiis Magnificence to foreign Na- 
tions. He therefore left the oVerfeeing his Buil- 
dii^ to the care of a grave Relation, whofc' 
Knowledg and Honefty he thought he could 
' beft confide in, and fo let out for Femcty td 
take the Diverfions of the Carnival, andftiow 
his fplendid Equipage, where many Nations 
might be Witnefles of his Pomp and MagniJi-' 
ccnce. . ^ ; . 

He had not been long at Femce^ but the Fi^ 
gure he made recommended him fo'theAc-' 
quaintance of the Gteat, and the EylS (3f tp6 
Vdr. For, befides the dazling Beauty df Ks* 
Riches, which gave Charms, Wit, and Honoaf 
where Nature gave none, he had really thofe 
of Perfon to ft degree of perfeftion ; his Stature 
was tall, his Shape neat j his Mien great, iand 
yet graceful ; his Eye ful), black, and fpritely j 
nis Hair hung dowh to a length very unccftn- 
mon; he danc'd and fimg finely, and talkM 
with a great deal of Vivacity and Wit, fo that 
the Men were mightily taken with his Conver-; 
iation, the Womien more; for the Liberties of 
the Carnival had made him more knowii t*, 
■ t\m 



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tl^at Sex tlian at another time he could have 
bperi. Tho^ he was not extreamly prone to 
Ihtrigues with the Fair^ yet was he not (b cold, 
but that Donna BianchA found fuch a palTage 
to his Hea^^s rendered hini entirely hen Cap- 
tiv€i\ rWliat Other Affairs he had witli the La- 
dies oiVenkeyjis they have nothing to do with 
inyprefehtDefign, fo did they never come to 
my Knowledge, I being at that time a fort of 
wandring. Foliage round a Bracelet, which 
Donna m^ncJu always wore on her Arm. 

BUnch4v^2iS Wife to the younger Brother 
of an Ancient Magmfco^ who had as few Qua- 
lifications of ,1Vlerit as any Nobleman in Fe^ 
nice. His Age was above Fifty, his Temper 
Coveteous^ Froward, and Jealous,and his Per- 
foil was fully as difagreeable as his Mind, for 
he was Crooked, and Paraletic ; and all his 
Conjugal Happinefs (if the indifference of a 
FejKtUn Husband and Wife can merit fuch a 
Name) depended on his Authority as a Huf- 
baiid, and the Vigilance and FideUty of his 
Spies. B^ancha on the other Hand was perfefl:- 
ly beajUtJIul in her Perfon and Face; but in 
her Mind as filly and inflpid as moftof the 
Vep^etian Ladies are. 

\ Count Guido had taken particular notice of 
her J in the Piazza o( St. Marky where her very 
fliape and m^in had made fo great an Iropref- 
fion 6^1, Jiis Heart, that he could not reft till he 
ioiew. ,the caufe of his Defires : He therefore 
i^inploy^d his Spies, whom he paid very well,to 
watcb her home ; tho' the Task was diMtult 
as A^ell as dangerous, Gold made them accosn- 

:; ' ' c piifli 

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fH i ibtf U O I- D E N b P Y* 

pUfli their work, and inform the Count who 
his Miftrefs was, and where fhe U vM* By the 
fame means he had notice wherever fhe went, 
fo following her one day to Church, he placM 
himfelf as near her as pofUbly he could, in 
hopei either of throwing in a word of paffion 
in the intervals of her heavenly Ejaculations ; 
:ky Accident or other wtmld 
sr her Face were of apiece with 
xiy,which was entirely charm^ 
light have prayM and watchM 
in vain for fuch an opportunity, harf not an al-* 
moft fatal Chance laid open tliat Countenance 
thatcofthimfo manyfighs and fuch dangers 
as robM him of his Life in the end. They knelt 
before an Image of the Virgin^ which Had the 
Charafter of fo compaffionate an Idol, as ne- 
ver to deny any Suit that was prefcrM to her, 
and it was tliis day adornM in a moft pomjwu^ 
manner, and furrounded with great illumina- 
tions; and if it had been known thai the Count 
had pray'd to this Miraculous Image fcwr the 
fucccfs of his Defires in that particularj the 
Event Iiad certainly made no inconfiderable fi- 
gure in the Legend.For the crowd beinggreat, 
and Biancha very near the Rail of the Imag^ 
part of her Veil, in turning, fell over it, ^o 
caught fire from the Candles,and in a nionicrrt 
burft out in a Flame, The Count was the firft 
that, alarin'd with her Danger, callM to them 
about her, who before he could make way to 
her, Jiad tore it from her Head ; which at onCd 
difcoverM a Face,that would haveturnM^^ 

into all thofe Forms to enjoy her,wliich he us'a 

m 



dbyGoogk 



in his Amours with the Heroines of Antiquity, 
. snd a ihort E^ath invading it, and clofing ber 
Eyes^whlch yet fet the Couni's Heart in a grea- 
ter Flame than that of ber Veil, and much hard- 
er to be extiftgyifli'd j for hers, by the care of her 
Attendantsy was loon put out, but his could not 
expire by any thing but its Cau(e. 

The Lady being m a fwoon, the Count t^nd 
fbrnt others made way through the Crowd for 
her Servants to carry her iiito the open Air, 
where foon recovering, (he open'd fuch Eyes as 
caiilj compleateda 0)nqueii> that was foiar 
gain'd beforci 

The Count was riot thfeonly Man^ that was 
Wounded on this occafion; for there happened to 
be by another, who thd' he deferVM her much 
-left, was yet far more fuccelsful in his Endea- 
vours; for Berttar/foCooa obtain'd ail thofe Fa^ 
voursfor xt'hich the CoUrtt figh'clj and laboured 
long in vain. . 

BernarJo was juft the ReVerfe of the Couttt, 
in Poribo, in T^mper^ and Fortune. ^ His Perfori 
was low, and fomcthing diftorted, his Hair black 
as a Raven, hisEyCi almoft white, andhis Cora- 
plexioa ftUow ; his Age about forty : As he was 
far from being genier^ in his Temper, fo his 
Fortune was but theibatter'd Remslitis of a Pro^ 
digal Father? which yet he manag'dtothe beft 
Advantage of making a tderatile Apipearance in 
hi^ own degree of Quality. This Gentleman 
Was by at this Accidenr^and (how'd hio^ielf not 
i^ oifficiQUs than the amorous Count, in afftft* 
ing Biatiebam this fiery Misfortune, and found 
fooie gracious Regards from the Fair one, which 
C * ^*^'^<' 

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Gttii/tf'wzs not able to engage l^ all the Harmo- 
ny of his Parts and Addreft, fuch mid Caprice 
fits Sovereign in the Appetite of Woman. ^ 
Bv this time it was no Secret who ttie Laoy 
was; nor where (hcliv'd ; fo that both her Lo- 
vers knew the ftria Guard ihe was under, and 
therefore that Gold was abfolutely neccflary tor 
' oach. This gave little pain to the 
) valu'd his Mony only for its Ufe^o 
:e to his PleafureSjand he therefore re- 
crifice his whole Fortune to an En- 
thout which his Life muft bean in^ 
; Burthen. B^nwrz/tf on the other fide 
wasasfenriblethatMony was neccflary to bring 
about his Satisfaaion; . but his Exchequer was 
then at a low ebb, and hot many pieces of Gold 
■ could be drawn thence for anateir of this Impor- 
tance : yet he was fo fortunate as to have 
all his Gold tindur'd at leaft with thisnoble 
Kind of which I have fooken. He therefore gave 
fome,ind promised infinitely more,fo that what- 
ever Hand it came to, had no Power t» refift its 
force, but was entirely brought over to hisintc* 
reft. * He happened to have his Pidure in Mh«' 
ture chacM in the fame Gold, which coming in- 
to the pofleflion of Biatiebayby a ftrange kind of 
Witchcraft, made him appear in her Eyes the 
moft defirable of Mankind ; and was refolvy to 
run the rifquebf all, to gratifieihcir mutual de- 
fires. 

Count (?«/</<?, in the mean while, had made ve- 
ry large Prefents tball her Guard^andreceiv'das 
hree Proniiftsof their Afliftancej and tl^e La- 

• <Jy 



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^ :*':»ir L ACT/ Ta/<i ^1 

dy l»dng ifia^ acauainced withh^SuIt^ re- 
ceiv*id what Jewels he fent her, and refplv d to 
improve this Affair to the Advantage of her 
Favourite Ix>vcr. To this end (he difcovers 
aS'the 0»int's Pretenfions to her Husband, 
Infiiittating at the fame time^ thsit Mony- 
might begot by the defcreet management of 
fo wealthy a Lover ; and that he could not 
idoubt a Fidelity, that had voluntarily facrificM 
€o handfom and accom|>lifh*d a Peribn to his 
jsMid her Honour. Avarice had a |reat Afcen- 
liant over the Husband, fo that being thus adr 
mitted a Coofidant, Jie eafily allowM of the 
p>Ddii£l. Thus as the Count gave largely,all 
the Spies encourag'd him, took what he gave, 
mid deliverM his Letters and Prefents to their 
Xsuiy ; (b diat Hope bribM by Defire confirm^ 
lum in his Folly^ 

TheCount,toimprpveOpportunity,carefs*d 
the Husband extreanily, and loft his Mony to 
him freely, to render himfelf the more agree- 
able to ius covetous Humour. But all he 
got by what he did, wasonly fair Words frooji 
die Spies, and a tranlitory Look now and then 
Irom Biaucha at her Window, which only 
(erv'd to heighten his Defire and Impatience. 
In the^viciffitude of his Gaming, it was hi? 
luck to win a few piieces of the nobler Metal, 
and with jthp fam^ l^ck prefented them to th? 
mofi' powerful, btcaufe moft trufted of her 
Guard, who was fo entirely gjiiiii'd by this 
powerfiil Bribe, that the Count was prpr 
mis*d admittance on the firft Qpportiinity of 
^e Abfeijcp. of the liusbapd jwhici^tbe Count 
;'■■•-••■■■•.-; - ••p|- - ■....took 

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took carefoon to fupply,by flaking a Friend 

engage bim at play by lofing his Mony to him^ 

But alas \ the Count did not imagine that all 

the happj Minutes he ftirnifh-d,Ber«rfr<fo ep- 

joy*d ; for wherit the Count detainM theHus^ 

• band to engage Iiis Familiarity by lofing his . 

Mony to him, Bermrdo was admitted to th§ 

Wife,and rifled all thofe Charms at eafe,which 

Guido took all thofe pains, and was at fo vaft 

a|i Expence for in vain. Thus on the prefent 

cccafion,jB^r»4r<io was before-hand with liim ; 

and %vhilft he was attending at the Doof, was» 

admitted tp his MiftreiTes Arras* 

Count Guido being at laft convey'd iip to 
an Anti-Chamber of Bisncha^s Apartment, by 
|:he Spy he had thus gainM to this Intereft, he 
attended therea while withtrembUng and im- 
patience at fo near an approach to tfe jPerfon 
that only by her Pity and Cliarms could give 
bis perpetual difquiets any ceffation or eale, 
ButFate,thatdifpofesus and our Affairs with 
^n arbitrary fway, fopn gave a melancliolly 
turn to all his Hopes, for liftenmg to every 
jipife, be thought he heard finom the adjacent 
Robnl the hoarfe found of t\vo murmuring 
Voices, of fo different a tone, that tlie diffe^ 
rence pf Sex was eafily difcovePd, Sotha? 
now fir?d with Jealoufie,he ftoleclofer to the 
poor,iihd putting his Ear to the Key-hole he 
plainly heard the following Words— Mfdeaf 
Befnardo,jf(?ar Fv»iir ovef-Mtf fVeakm/s is but 
idbfl^n- iciyoH hiivt IfAcri^/dti^ Ho^fy «^, 
-my Hudmdt utty^tnyou 1 fi/WgfdcrifiMthehMi^^ 

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X DC LaAI>Y S JLOfCe, 3^ 

V^ Italy, mfHusbandy that I might bt the more 
free anJi fecttrfi in the dear Hapfinefs of thy Em^ 
hraees. Love, my dear e A Biancha (replyM the 
Man) is the chi^f^ nay^ the only Merit ^ that can det 
ferve thee^and Love is what I PoJTefs in afar grea^ 
ter degree than any of Mankind -y.. I therefore df-^ 
ferve thee more than all the rejt of my Sex. 

Words like thefc were fuflkicnt to 4rive 
fuch a Lover into fuch a Rage iand Madxiefs,a* 
to produce a fatal Confequence ; nor could the 
Count bear the Indignity of being mad^ ^ P^ ^* 
pei3y for the benefit of another ; hut buriting 
open the Door, he drew his Dagger, ana 
rufhM in with a Refolution at once to put an 
pnd to the Life and Happinefs of his Rival* 
But the noife he had made« luid aiarm'd the 
Lovers, fo that Bernardo by the help o( Biancha 
(Upt out at another Door,and made his efcape ; 
while Biancha (being pleasM that it was not 
her Husband, as Ihe fear^d^ but a Lover with^ 
odt Power) ftopt the Count from purfuing 
him, upbraiding him in this manner* Whence 
Siry this InJbUnce in my Afartmenty vi4Hre your 
'very Being deferves Death I which for my fake you 
ought to exfeSt ; yet in r^ard <>f a Pajfion you 
havefo often troubled mf about ^ I might far don thie 
rude effefiof ity becanfe tho^ we do not value the 
Sacrificery the Sacrifice is not always dtfi^reeablh 
But your only wof to let my. Pity take f lace of my 
Rejentmentj is to retire this moment ^ and never 
more to think of a Paffion fo injurious to my H&* 
nour. 

Tour Honour (replyM tl!t Count wjth 9 fri>9$ 
cipreflfng too mv»ch of difdain) t bofe isfafer i> 

C 4 ^ 

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!34- 1 O^ VJ O I> D E N D P T. ^ » 

tm Hands ^ thm in thofe of that Wretch^ wtpff 
jiedfrom nrf Refentment. He th^t tvants Courage^ 
Mddam^ can never boufi much of Love ; andjtnct 
you have oHce madefo ill a Choice^ permit me to 
hope that you will now take the Opportunity of 4' 
better. Tho' I know no Ground (affumM Bian^ 
chayfor an Infolence that is not to be born without ' 
afpeedj Revenue ^ yet ^ Sir^ I can fee plainly that 
you mean to injult me^ or which is O/S bad^ to Prefs me 
to that criminal converfe with your felf^ which you 
tPould infmuate Jh^ve been guilty of with fome (?-; 
fher ; yet ajfureyourfelf^ that whenever I JhaS be 
Jo weak to make the choice you mention^ I fball nevir 
think him worthy of it y that can fee any fault in 
my Conducf^which betrays as little Love as RefpeB: 
begone therefore with thyfruitlejs Hypocrifie^as un- 
availing to theey as difagreeable to me^ unlefs lou 
refolve to fujfer ifjat Punifhrnent your Intruding 
"Boldnefs dejerves. ' - 

The Count was ftruck dumb with her yn* 
common AfTurance, and confounded with hdr 
Rage, and Indignation ; but this knowledge 
of her Guilt to both her Husband and him 
Gould not make, him bravely to quit the pur- 
fuit of fo \yorthIefs a Creature ; but throwijRg 
himfelf on his Knees, and clafping her Hano, 
he open'4 his Bofom and prefented her his Dag^ 
ger ; Here Madam (laid he) transfix the mojl li- 
ving and tender Heart in the World^ revenge your 
f elf upon mey and deliver tne by afpeedy Death profit 
Pains and Agony s that ^re injinitely more ter^ 
pble^ lean endure any thing but your ¥ufy\ ani 
* tho].mjl Fidelity 4eJ?rvfs 4 milder Fate^yet if I 



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x PC ju A o y J X cqic. , 35 

fftujt dye to stone the follies of my Tongue y let this 

fair Hand be niy Executioner. 

' In fhorjt, he arguM fo pathetically^ Iook?(| 

fo dcjefltcdly , ' as .would have relcu^d his 

life from any Woman befides, jf not have 

gain'd a ferther Advantage in her Heart ; but 

^e only feemM to' be pa^ify^d, and with the 

height of Diflimulation gr;ew calmer and cal- 

iner,till fhe admitted liim to kifs her Hand,and 

talk of Love in fo free a manner, as bred that 

Confidenceof herfihcerity in him which fhe 

defir?dtoacdomplifhhis Ruin in a more barV 

barous manner. But Ihe had a double defign 

lid her Cbmplaifance, to revenge her felf oii 

ihe odious Difturber of her private Pleafures, 

knd fecure them for the future by the Credit 

ftiefliould get with her Husband, by making 

thelaft Sacrifice of a Lover fhe did not care 

for, for one on whom fhe doated. 

By this means fhe took an Opportunity to 
fend away a Servant with all fpeed to her Hus- 
band, to let him know,that the Count was got 
into her Apartment without her knowledge j 
and that flie would amufe Mm there till he 
tame to piinifh himin iPiirfe orPerfon,ashe 
■ ihould tmnk naofl convemejjt* . 
' I^ the mian Avhile,to delude him the more, 
and ^et to the place mblt fitting for her pur- 
tx>fe, fhe led him into her Bed-Chamber, to 
^taife his Mind to hopes and eager defires 
' \i4icich fhe deteSi'min*d never to fatisfie* Poor 
-Count Guido nqw thought himfelf in the very 
(Jiieft Road to Happinefs; and the Lady did 
■^ll$ie could to confirm fels fattlmiftafcc hv 

. / 

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«« 4^ «h# C A • 



allowing him all the Freedoms he could wift, 
except the laft ; till now word was brought, 
that ner Husband was coming, and would not 
be long from her Apartment^ that all the Ave- 
nues to the Houfe were befet^and that Revenge 
feemM glaring in his Face.She€xpfefs'd all tE^ 
Confufion in the World, and the utmoft Con- 
cern both for bis Life and her own* He ad" 
vis*d her to fly with him; that, ihe told him, 
was now impoflible; but the ejdgence ad- 
mitting no debx^,ihe advis'd. him to go out 
of Window by a Cord that fhc fiaattad,. an^ 
while both Ends were fix'd to the B^s of thie 
Window,to (it in the middle tifl. he-were gSnie 
and yielded a better opfwtumty for h» E- 
ic^pe. Neceffity made him take hold of tlie 
«fily way of a Refpite of his Fate, tho' he de- 
clar'd he had rather die, than have her exposed 
to her Husbands barbarous Cruelty. When 
he was feated, and the Cafement clos'd, his 
Head was fo near it>that he could both fee and 
bear all that was done in the Room. The firft 
amazing thing he faw, was Biajtfha flying in- 
to the Arms of her Husband, and he as kindly 
deceiving her, and then Ihe drawing him near 
^e WindoW) fpoI(e aloud to him in thefe 
Words. Jh4Jve,m^Pe4ar0tUlil(Hi>i$0mrP(nv'r 
thM trouhleJhu'Im/iiuUrtfjOMrHimmrsifdmsffey 
ujeystur a»n Mferetit^ (n fhe^ Pu»iAmt»t tfttt^ 

mthifig ^Ife cMf ptrftBhfieuri mj Rnif^stiSiP^ 
fincehy theT^reukery offome of yoarJEmUy^ hi 
htshttnAJmatuiintomy Aftftimtity mJL kj his 
fitvn vhlenci^ h has for fV himfelf into mf.BeJU, 

-.. - ■ ■■ ■'■••■ ■ .' ■'* - ■ . . • ■ 0iA 



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Chamber^ What ^amdal msj he net rdfi \to the 
Death of my Repofe snd yours! ^Tis true^ the 
Rights of your Bed are yet not eontaminated^ but 
haayoujtaid much longer all my Arts could not haiye 
frotelfed me from his Madnefs^ 

The Husband in a great fury askM where 
he\iras? what Ib^ had done withhim? and 
whether Ihe did not dally with his Fury ? She 
replied, Tumiour Rage j^ainfi a juft^ Caufe^ and 
let the Count feel your An^pr^ not me^ i»bo have 
pith an artful addrefsfixt him where he can neither 
help himfelf nor hurt you \ 4ffrtfach that Window j. 
and you mil find him ready to receive your Cbajtije- 
ment^ without Of^ foffibUityof efc^^ing. 

The Count obferving them comii^ to hi^ 
place of retreat, he with a^Penknife cur one or 
the ends of the Rope, and Aiding dibwn by it as 
&r as he could, chofe rathei^ to venture luch a 
mighty fall, and truft to the clemency of the 
Waters, than to the pitjr of fuch a Wife and 
fuch a Husband ; fo leaping into the great Ca» 
hal, he was toisM about: And now almofl 
ipent with fwimming, he met with a Gondola^ 
(as we afterwards were informM) which cout 
keying liim to fhore, he immediately left Fe^ 
nice in that condition, and died, as Report 
went, on the Road to Ferrara. 
'-' Thus, Sir, (laid my little Piece) this Story 
makes ou|: what I have told you of the difPe- 
i:ent nature of this and the common Gold. Yo[i 
may likewiff learn this Moral from it, Th^t 
Unlawful Ltk^e is generafy attended with Jfrfan^ 

0nd Ruip. " ^ 

• n ■■ ' 

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:iO JLO^ UOLDEN OPT. 

PleasM infinitely with this Story and its Mq? 
ral, I askM him if there wa? any great quanti- 
ty of tliis valuable Metal now in the World : 
he alTur'd me there was, fince the Tow^r ofDa^ 
nae and all its Avenues were almoft fiUM with 
it J but that Jupiter being ifi indignation at the 
Father^ for flighting bim as a Gallant for his 
Daughter, and locking her up clofe till deli-j^ 
vcr'dj^and then throwing her and her Child in- 
to the Sea, he fcatterM it all round the face of 
the Earth. One grain of this Gold is fufficient to 
compafs the extent of your Ambition or Lave ; fair 
there is no Fortrefsfofirongy as to be imfregn/wle to 
it ; nor any Heart Jo hardy that it mS not/often ait 
its touch. 

But,iaid I, fince fofmall a quantity is able 
to compafs all our Defires, how comes about 
that when we ofifer but a little to bribe a Jtidge^ 
fOrrupt xGovernoury or fuborn tCo^^dant^ we 
feldom or never fucceed, iand yet leldont fail 
when we double theDofe, and raife' it to the 
Conftitution of the Recipient ? I find (laid my 
Piece) you havefoon forgot, or little inindea, 
Vhat I told yoUjThat this^Metal isfcatter'^dovet 
the wholeWorld in grains:, and th^typrhafSyOne 
grain may not fall to the lot of a thoufand pieces of 
l^ffer excellence. Belvoir is xVorth perhaps i 
million, and yet i$ not Maflrer of a drachm of 
this ; whereas Boufoy^ who has not xhtfortieth 
part of his Wealth, may bq much better ftorM 
With this Omnipotent Gold': Thus the forttxct. 
meets Succefs mfeiv things, the later in aS. 

The Pofitions you advance (faid I) are fe 
uncommon and furprizing, that you'd infinite- 

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ly Qblijgciw:,,if youM but difcover the Secret 
qf diftinguiflbing this fort of Gold from t'other^ 
This Goldy faid he^ ^ Hhe the Materia fubtilis,-^ 
the wonderful Bffeifs of tvhich 4re revealU hj Tw^ 
Md ExPeriencey tho^ it entirely fly the cfigniz^ame* 
tf all the Senfes, . 

But pray interrupted I) are not you, v/ho 

xiow hold this wonderfiilconvcrfation with me, 

of this admirable Species ? . ^o, f faid he, in a^ 

fort of furprize^^the thoufandth part of me at 

this time can^t ckin^ this tionour. But I begin 

to firiell your Defigh, and ought immediately 

to put an end^ to our Converfe, by a Silence 

that may prevent your putting me under a. 

confinement thVt is equally myl^ear and my 

Averfibn. But fliould yon fb deceive me, the 

Punilhment would fodn reach your fclf, fmcc 

contrary to common Opinion, by our Liberty, 

not Bondage, we bring Wealth to our Owners. 

And this I take to have been the caufe of my 

fo often changing my Matters and my Shape ; 

whether they difcoverM my Talent by my 

.Countenance, or that it is my Fate to be a per- 

^pctual Knight-errant, I know not ; but let the 

Caufe be what it\^\% Pythagoras himfeIf,who 

rememberM fo many different things in as ma* 

ny differeUjt Bodies, never had fo great a varie* 

ty of Shapes as my felf. 

I could entertain you with abundance of the 
Secrets of Antiquity, as the Impoftors of the 
Priefts oiJfollo^ hiving long been a piece of 
* the golden Tirfod from which they pronounc'd 
all their Oracles ; but modern Cheats have put 
thofe ancient Frauds fp much out of coup te- 

nancpj 



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5^ j.»ipv9VJUJj£.JN %j r J, 

toancc, that my Difcouiie upon the former 
would fcem too inHpid to ent^tain you. Tis 
true f anfwePd I) my Curiofity rather leads me 
to know the Myftcties of modem IniquitV, in 
which lam fb much aftranger, that all you 
ihaH tell me will have the Charm at lean c^ 
Novelty. 

In tbatyaiTum'd he, I can give vouan em- 
tire iatis&dion, from the fcepter*d Monarch 
to the humble Shepherd, that walks with his 
Crook on the Plains; but Imuft tell you, Sir, 
tliis is a point fo very nice to touch on, that if it 
fiiould be known whence the Intelligence 
came, fome of the difobltg*d Great ones (who 
hate Truth more thsutt Merit) would certain- 
ly compleat my Ruin and Mifery, by fhutting 
lAe up where I ihoujki never more iwhold the 
glorious Light of the Sun. Tour FeoTf replied I j 
Jeems to me ^together grounMefsy fmee the Stdi*'^ 
you bear is common top rndfty thoafandsy and tie 
peculiar Mark of your Excellence fo invifible to 
numan Eyes. 

B^ng fatisHed with this reaibn,he laid afide 
all Oiution, and difcover*d fuch private In; 
trigues of the Fair, the Great fZnd the Godly^ zk 
\vere as furprizing as new : He gave me a fuQ 
account of all theParticulars of the Intrigues of 
the Bifhop of ^ — with the Lady * * * *, and 
feveral of the fair Sex : The Adventure of the 
Bell was pleafant enough, tho' to the mortal 
difappointtiient of the Bifhop and the Lady. 
Nor was the Miftake of the Summer-houfe leis 
diverting, than an Argument of his Lordfhip's 
Vigour and Good-nature, extending his Bene- 

voleace 



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voiencetothe ioweft as well as the highiell. I 
could likewife tell you by what me^ns tiw 

Dean of got the rich Bifiiopi;|eJk of , 

for which he was more beholden to the lair 

Eyes of Mrs. , thin his own great Lear- 

mng or Piety ; but thcfe are things of an invi- 
dious nature, and I dare not yet reveal *em, 
left Ilhould be thought to wound that Vene- 
rable Body thro' the fides of fome of its loofe 
Members; tho',I confefs,'tis hard that thofe 
wholhbuld have no liberty of finning, fliould 
be the onlv Men fecur'd from all Reflexions, 
when moftabandon*d in their Aftions; but I 
fliaU not, as matters ftand, venture to provoke 
a fort of People that are more famous for teaeh' 
ing than praifijing Forgivenefs : Befides, they 
have been fo often on the Stage, and fo long 
the Anvil of Satire to no purpole,that *tis hard 
to produce any thing new on fuch a SubjeOr. 

I prefs'd my little Piece to give me a fuU ac- 
<»untoftheC4«g>and the Court, which were 
places I had butlittle acquaintance with. You 
iiluftnot (replied he) exped to find Princes 
and Great Men fuch Gods as their Flatterers 
and Idolaters make 'em, or fo exalted in Wif- 
d^m and Virtue as in Riches or Degree. Alas I 
I their Failings and Follies, as well as Vices, are 
AS numerous as thofe of other Men: Nay, h 
who have been admitted into their Glofcts, 
have bfcen Witnefs of fuch Tranfiidions as the 
meaneft of their Subfe£ls would have blufli'd 
at. 'ni|8fet)enii-gpds, whom fome Men reve- 
rchce^^ tiungs oxa fuperiour nature in many 

par- 



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mrticulars^inall Agcs^ havedifcover'd them^ 
1^1 V€S to be muchlefs than ^I^n. ' ; 4 . 
Biit 'tis too late to begin with fo ample a 
^bjed, when the lilight is fo far wafted^ tjiat 
you muft necefTarily require fome hours of 
Repofe ; wherefore 1 win difnjifs you with a 
Story much more light and airy, and which 
will not difturb you witliany unpleafant Re* 
membrances* 

The Story of the Mercenary Gallant. 

IT hapncd lately that I was in the Servic^ of 
a Lady of Qjiality and Figure, who was 
full as amorous as beautiful ; but thp' fhe lov'd 
her Fleafure much, yet fhe lovM her Money 
more, and therefore cjfjofe often to eafe her In- 
clina:tions with her Husband, rather than part 
with her Gold to her Gallant, It was her 
Chance to be in love with a young Gentleman 
of a flender Fortune, tho' he livM to the height 
of a bulky one. . / . 

This Lldy'^ Husband being involvM in tpa- 
ny Law-fuits,was obliged to be much in Tawn 
about the Inns of Court. This furnifh'd the 
3^ouiig Gentleman with frequent Opportuni^ 
ti^'Of preffing an Amour, in which he had a 
view not only to the Pei^fpn of the L^ady, but 
her Wealth, from whicli he hopM a fealonaJble 
Supply to his importuning Occafio|is; bu^ the 
Lady on the other hand, tW liberal of h^er Fa- 
yours,was always careful of keeping herPurt^i^ 
juftly believing iier Charms fumcient to;^^^ 
chaie Lovers, without being at the expeii^-Of 



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bujring them with her Gold. " 'His afliduity in 
Addrels foon got him free admittance at all 
hqurs even to her very Clofet, where he had 
frequently revePd in her Arms, and by a vigo- 
rous Embrace fatisfied her moft filacious De- 
fires ; but he had attempted all Ways and Arti 
in vain, to move her Generofity to grant him i 
little Supply, which was fo very necelTary to 
fupport his Equipage : But one day entring her 
Cabinet, he found ner extended on theCouchj 
with her Neck and Bfeafts quite bare, and few 
Charms hid from the Eye; but he had been 
too often furfeited with Beauties he had not 
now fo ftrong a relifh of, as of a more charm- 
ing rich Necklace which encompafsM the Ivo-» 
rvr Tower of her Neck, and hung down in lit-' 
tie Croflcts on her Lilly-white Bofom. 

The Gallant likM the Prize too well not td 
have thoughts of ffecuring it ^ as a Pledge at leaft 
of a Reward of his amorous Services, w^Iiich he 
thoughc was his due. Sleep Was his Friend on 
this occafion, for that held her fafter in its 
embraces than ever ; fo that undoing the Loc- 
ket, (which I theft was) he took it from hei" 
Neck, and, to make a clean conveyance, fwal- . 
low'd the Pearls ohe by one, like Pills, till the 
whole Dofe was compleated : Th^n makiiig a 
little noife, as if juft enterM^ he wakM the f^jr 
Lady, who exprefsM a fmall refentment for his 
difturbing hfer Repofe ; but turning that tQ 
Raillery, Ihe fmilingtold him, he ne'r took any 
Favour but what wa§ prefented him, and that 
Ihe now perceived be made a Confcience of his 
Doings* ^ 



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*^^Q^le 



Tmmtfo eonfeientious (replied he) MUm^a 
jou Are fleas'^d to imagin^ norof^ there mam i»ho 
make a better ufe afdn Offortunity than npjffilf; I 
always ^nieavourH to fieal thofe Fawmrstnat n^ere 
reffu^i me^ and ever valued them mofi which I olh 
tain" din that manner: Nor can yoUy Madam^be 
fofitive to my Conduit with you at this time y nor do 
you know but that I have fiole fome dear Fanjour 
^hileyou were info deep a Sleepy and Jo ea^lygai^fd 
what you would not have granted had you been awake^ 
MaSy laid flie. you are toofenfible I can deny yo^ 
pqthingy and that makes pujligh thoje minutes (f 
fiafpinefs of which Fortune jeems to be Prodigal W 
you^- 1 thought you had known our Sex better ^ who 
are pleased to loje that by an agreeable Violence^whicb 
they refufe to ^rant OH other termjs^ 

Her WorcK were fucha^pleafaiit double Eir«^ 
tendre on what he had done, ttet he could not^ 
forbear burfting into a laughter ; th^ provok'd 
her to accufe him of an wnpardonable Indiflfe^ 
rence,withfucha toneof refentment, that he 
thought himfelf obUg'd to appeal to her to de- 
cide how well he had improy'd the time of her 
fleep, by that means t0 try whether Ihe reaDy 
knew any thing of the Theft he had been guil- 
ty of. Either (faid hs)you arefenfible of all that 
has nowpaji betwixt us^ or you are not ; dfyoff ^h 
ym muff know that I have not mifimplofdny Tivf V 
if not ^ pu can^tjufily reproach my Indifference ^^ 
JVegle^ of an Opportunity^ which you know not how 
I have improv dt 

: No Siry (faid Ihe wkh a lan^wfliiag Ak^^^ 

have done nothing ; and as I ca9^tmough amf^^ 

purUodefiyinyourC^nduSiyfo whenever IfdM 



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'^wjurey^u/ballivatchmthme^ beUufe you.dre not 
iihlytodifiurbmjRepofek 
\ Bein| \vith this Reproach touchM to the 
][uick*. ne began to oflter thofe Civilities Ihe 
^eitfa to upbfaid him with the omiffion of, 
jUtfte repuIsM him with Difdain; however 
a little gentle preffing foon reeoncil'd her to 
his Enibraces, by which having appeased her, 
ind fitting both on the Gouch, Ihe related a 
Dreani file had lA the Sleep in whidi hefound 
lier. 

/yirt^, faid Ihe, ^ vtanmn Qjpid in thefdme 

j^Turc he is ArAwn4>j the Poets andPamters^ with 

winp 0n his Shoulders^ Md his Bm and Quiver by 

ffisfide^ Md in his Hand d Girdle^ whichhe called 

the Girdle of Vtms ; fhe^ought I nfss Jhffici^tly 

Mfriz^^d of the forvtr'and vertue of this Girdle^ and 

theHms deprous to know ivhat the young Wdntm 

dejkh^d to do with it j n^hen^to fr^ juVprize^ he tied 

it woutmy Netk^ not niyWdijiy and told me^ t^hilfi 

tmreittjbould never wdntJdmirefs^ then vsl^ 

nij^H Otttofmyftghti, Affoon as he difafpedrd^the 

Imwe (f a Man ptejented itjelftome^whofe Mein 

0nAP^fon ipete extreamly /^reeable to my Famy^ 

dniwhofeen^d to have much of your Air and toun* 

yenance j he maJ^fome attempts oh my Honmr in 

ynin^andpsore on my Girdle^ which whilfi hefirovt 

to unrieji I ^ak% and found it bnly a Dream, 

But (faid theGatiant) // 1 have really aBed alt 
theje Fatts of which you only drear^d^l hofeyou^ll 
ditoip that all your Refroatheswert unjufii True^ 
*feid Ihe, butfince what f havi^ toldfrov^d aDream^ 
Jfhall very muchfuffeB the reality ofyourBreten^^ 
ponsl So fifing t^ io adjtift her felf in the GlafSj 
. • D it ihe 



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Jhc found her Necklace was gone, and lookittg 
about the Couch for it in vain, fbe was not un- 
cafie,fuppofing he had only put that Trick up- 
.on her to teaze her a little, and therefore went 
on in this manner : Tou had reafon ({did (he) to 
fiandfor the Reality of my Dreamy fince the lafi 
Man I had to do with has rohVd me of that iphich 
incomfaCs^d my Neck } and^ tux come to the pointy i* 
is you that have untied my Necklace ; but the Jeji 
being over^ if^^y ^^turn my V earls. 

HedcnyMtheAccufation, but (he thinking 
he had a inind ftill to cany on the Diverfion, 
faid, / prithee rejtore me this Girdle of Venus, 
fince without it Cupid told me IJbould lofe all my 
Lovers. I will prove the little God a Uar^ (an- 
fwer'd \it) fori myfelfwill lo'Ve you as bn^ as t 
live. This profcffion would have pleasM heir 
at another time, but now being intent on her 
Lofs,lhci defirM him to reftoreme Jewel which 
he certainly had. With an Air of refentment 
he defirM her to learchhim,and clear him from 
an Imputation flip could not in Juftice lay on 
him, after fo intimate and long a coire^n- 
dence as they'd had. She was furprizM at his 
AfTurance, and would once more have exami- 
ned the CouCh,but he obliged her to fearch hini 
allovef ; (he finding nothmg about him,lpokt 
round the Clofet, but could meet with nothing 
liut the Ribbon and Locket, which he could 
not fwallpw, all ihe could do to recover the reft 
provirig in vain ; which he perceiving her ex- 
trcamly concernM at, in a gay manner thws 
addrelsMher: 

Madapr^ 

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The Mcrcenaty GaUant, 37 

MUimy I believe that your. NeckUce is heeomt 
d Prifofur of fVar, /utd that you have no way to r#- 
trieve it, but by faying the Kanjbm according to the 
Cartel: Tobefl>ottmthyo8y.tho*ydu havefearebU 
me all over y Ihave'*em concealed about nte, if you 
tan but dijcover the place, they are yours ; if not, 
Ttvo hundred pieces mufi redeem ^em. To (avc her 
Money fhe renew'd her learch, but that pro- 
vins vam, flie promis'd the Money on delivery 
-of the Pearls; hedefir'd till the next day, but 
could not obtain it, till he told her whitner he 
had convey'd 'em. 

The next day he brought *em in a fine cm- 
brpider'd Purfe, and flie deliver'd the Ranfom 
agreed oh, afluring him. That were flie but af. 
fur*d of his Fidelity, Ibp could not repent a 
Prefent that his Ingenuity deferv'd. Vows 
and Oaths were not wanting, and other Proofs 
of his Flame, which were very pleafing to a 
Woman of her Inclination. 

This may fliew to what Inconveniencies 
Ladies expofe themfelves, when they truft 
their Honours to young Fellows who make a 
Tridp of tpve, and have a greater Paflion for 
thd Vanities of Show^ thai) for the Cljarms of 
their MiftrelTcs. 

My little Piece haying finifliM his Stpry, \ 
laid nim down with his CompanionSj^ an<J 
Veiit my felf to Reft, which I found very 
welcome to me, but I fell riot to fleep without 
a Wilhfor the fpeedy paffage of Tiirie betwixt 
|hi$ and our next Entertainment. '■.'-:*/ 

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I& Jk€ ijQJ-DEN bPT. 



f( I '■' 7.1 I " Vi ■ ■ ' • I " I -r ■■ " - 



THE 

' SmndUigksBnt€ruinmeni. 



■If ' 



-Ox? Court; or, The M a j- e <»kI 
Female Favourites. 

BEing fully refrefhM with Sleep, I got vl^ 
and pauing aWay the Day in reading, { 
amusM my impatience of the Nights return^ 
by feeking now for Reafons'fro>m the Philo^ 
lophersfor fuch Events as they never dream'd 
ef. At laft the welcome Shades of Night be^ 
gantofpreadover the Hemifphere,anaauni^ 
verlal Silence in a few Hours fucceeded,whenC 
having difmifs'd my Servant, and feften'd my 
Chamoer-Door, I let all my Gold at Liberty 
0n my little Table,and threw my felf into my 
Bed in my Night-GoWn for my. mtwe ^fie 
Converlation with my Golden Pifcoyerer of. 
Secrets, that I was extreamly defirous of ha- 
ving a perieft Account of, 

I ha4 not lain loiig, but I heard firft one,and 
afterwards three other pieces ibegan to talk; 
the Adventure ivas fo liirprizing, th^t I rc4 
fplv'd not to interrupt theii^ Converfatibn, buf 

ip liftea to t^civDifcouffe,whcrice I mi^ht pec* 

'■■■"■ ■-■•■:> ■■ :<'■ ,,v.r;;. \) ^ .: ^^■ 

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life Mde and Female Favourites, 3 9 

Iftps learn fc«ne things that ojte might conceals 
Bit it was not long b^re I was oblig'd to 
imerpofe my Authority for thcprefervation 
of the Peace. For there was a Guinea^ a 5/>4- 
H^ Jfiftohy a Roman Crotv^y and'my little Louif 
d^Ore engagM in a deep diipute, in which, as 
^e Terms went very ni^h, fo neither would 
yield to the other theprelicmineijee, or even 
jillow an Equality of Merit either in War or 
Peace. 

But themoft pofitivein this,wasmv little 
}jmit d?Orey who made extravagant Encorai- 
un» on thofe many Advantages that trance 
fcis over an other Nations ; the Politenefs of 
ks Natives, and the Valour and eonduft of 
ksKin^. This made me imagine, that my 
Uttte piece had been converiantwith Monlj 
BfHeaa:, and'heard what he had wrote of the 
Life of Leim with all the exquifite Art of Flat- 
tery; and indeed I could not but ask him if 
he had not been admitted to his Counlel? No 
(faid he; but I ihould be tliemoft ingratefiil of 
all things, if I paid notthe/fame deffcrerieeto 
f^etpit le Qrandy which he pays to us. 

As hie was refiiming the praile of thtgran^ 
Monarchyhc was interrupted by the Spanyb Pi- 
J|fn^,aiid with that Air ofHaughtinas which 
isfo natural to the 5/4»Mr<i,fi.id, that all other 
Nltt^s were but the {weepings of the Spahifb 
Mb^rchy ; the^fuprcam Lord^f which wa« 
^efign^ by Nature for the Ertipire of the 
Wowd, and having already riie Title cSmojt 
CatMit. ■ •'* "■■ ■■ '■ 

'" • '- -. ■ - B:^ A 

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40 1 W;U^ p LiP E N O P T. V 

A bare Name 'and empty Title^ int#rrwpt 
ttdthe^oma^ Crov^n^^^^oi little importaiiQe 
without foriiething mor^ fubftantial to fupt 
port it. ^ut you muftall ot^n (continuM he) 
that all Nations fubmit to ours, for what we 
lield in the Time of tl^ie old Romans by the 
Sword, we now maintain by the Power of th^ 
Keys ; the greateft: Kings and Princes of £«- 
f-^/ifftill paying their Duty- to jR^/»^* 

Not fo faft, (faid the Guinea) thsit tirnaif 
now paft, /or Kings are no longer the Bubbles 
of the 4?ope ; and fince the ^ days of our good 
King Henry ^ his Holipefs has been taught, 
that the Subjeftion of other Princes is, very 
precarious^ But if confcious Worth fliay 
have leave to boaft, what I<f ation can compare 
with theE;«g///7>^,who are not Content to be rich 
and free themfelves when almpfl: all the 
World isf in flavery, but extend their Power 
to the Relief of the diftref?M on the CoAti^ 
lient ; Ihewing themfelves as dreadful to the 
Enemy by Land, as on^tb§*Seas, which is their 
proper Dominion; and thoVit be a Ijttlc 
World'of it felf, yet it is able to ftrikea Terror 
by the force of its Arms and th? Valour of its 
Natives, into the greater. 

Yop have all fpoke very well (faid I) on 
the -Excellence of the feveral Nations wliofi? 
Arms you bcar,let us therefore adjourn this fhh 
bate, and proceed toa^difcovery of thofc Se* 
cretspf the Court, and the Camp, whiclii 
have been promi?M by m^Mttl^ Louis 'd^Qre^ 

AH agreed to the Subject, but non^aigreecj 
to y if Id the pr^f^re^^c^ to ^ny o^Hv in begin- 

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The . jMdd and Female Favourites. 4 1 

fliiigof his Account; but the matter coming 
naturally before me as Mafter of them all, I 
foon gave it to the Roman Crewnj^as being much 
the greateft Stranger in the parts ; and it be- 
ing now the Mode of being fond of eVy thing 
that comes from Itdjj even to their moft ri- 
diculous Follies and moft abandoned Vices, I 
was willing to be in the Fafhion. 

The Itdun more full of himfelf than the 
Favour which helook'd on ^s hi? due from Tr4- 
w^^/^;?/, began in this Haughty Air. 

I am not lurpriz'd that the other Pieces, 
who difown the Grandeur of ^^/j^ Ke>;»f,fhould 
contend with me for Preference ; but I am ve- 
ry much fcandalizM at the Catholic Gold for 
fo impious an Ufurpation, efpecially the Louu 
iOre^ whofe Mafter pretends to be the eldeft 
Son of the Church, and its prefent defender a- 
^ainft all its Oppplers. Nay, 'tis a fort of In- 
eratitude not very common, fince had it not 
been for Cardinal Mazariiu^ an Italian^ there 
had been no fiich thing as either Lettis le Grand 
or Louis iVQfe in Rerum Naiura. 

The Moiifieur could not forbear blulhijng 
atthe Reflexion, but told him that Mazarine 
conveyM vaft Sums of FnnchGolA into Italy^ 
but never any thence to France. That is not 
the Queftion, replyM the Italian^ my AflertioJi 
is, that France owM its brighteft Lewis to halj^ 
that is, to the Manhood and the Inftrudions 
ef Cardinal Mazarine^ 



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: I waf apprehenfive of the ill Conftquences 
of Reflexions fo fevere, I therefore by mjf 
'Authoritybid the Jtalim proeeed while tl*| 
f eft waited their Turns. - 

Before I come to the extraordinary Anions 
and AdY!?ntujesof the Courtiers and Favo% 
^tes of the Court of Rome, where I have been 
iconyerlant (for Gold is more brought to Rome^ 
^an froin thence) I niuftfay a, word or two 
pf a Court in general, in which I ihall Ihow 
jfhe Excellence of that Life above all othew, 
the necdfary Qualities of a Courtier, and th^ 
i^rudent Maxims by which the skiliW mov« 
lii that flippery Sphere. 
■ I have been in the bands of many befide^ 
Ctourtiers,and therefore I ani acquainted widi 
^e Coramoii-places of thofe, who have not 
bieen ^bie to arrive at the.IfeppiHefs they rail 
Jt; J:hey tell you, f^VAtJuUqiti volet ejjefsm?^ 
He t}>4t v^USe fiotU) let him wmcL the Coutt*^ 
hiit, no Body his j&id let.him airoid tl^ Cour^ 
i^ho would bo great, rich, and ha|>py. Now 
which is the moft valuable Statelet the major 
fity of MaAkiJod^deternvne ; the pious are few 
zm nD[i£erable,theii' opinion theitforeis of fmall 
iD^ieiglit with die many whoaim ^ W^Ithan^ 
Crrandeiir/ The di(^ce of Happinefs is natural 
ioall Mieh,and the iureft means t)f attaining 
thatcanneM^erbejuftly condemnM. The^)C^ 
<EuIatiye Notions of vain Fhil6fb^el's,whoii6-' 
ver lb fer believed their own Precepts as to pul 
them in Praflice, may ferve to lard the Dif-^ 
COurfes and Harangues of thofe poor Wretches^ 
^ho want Genius and ?ower to raife them- 

felves. 

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I ^ ^^me am J^emm pemmnes, 4 j 

Selves abdye the Vulgar. But Men of Spirijf 
%ill rather purfue a Sub jbmce wliiph in hei 
^joy ment yields them all, they can defire i|» 
jhis World. . '■ . ^ ^ • 

; T/r^i/ diftinguifljing the Oreat^eft qf thq 
^oraan| from p^her ^atipnS, %$, ' 

Es^cu^nt dliijfiraffti^ melius JEjta 
'.fredo eefaidem^ vivos ducetfi dtntarmef vulttts^ 
OriAu^cAufA/meUifSyceeliei^Meam ^ 

peferibent Ridio, (^JurgentU Sydera dlcfftt ; 

He tibi erdnt j^t^^ &c. — -— y w /. g/ 

deif ing, that the heigl^t of Humaue Perfeai- 
i>A wias tb be abj[e toljndw the Art of Ciovem- 
teent. ' Now 'tis eyMeht, that this Art i$ on, 
hrknbwntoijije Co»rti&sofcv&j Coimtiy* 
^e ftatt therefore of a Ciwrtier\s thfif feoft ex- 
<jellen| pf any, even by the O)nfeffion of a 
Poet ; a Creature inci(^ble, by 9. natural diffii ; 
4ence an^ n^led of In^uJfry, of atts|ining 
thatHappiaels. .- ^^^ 

^efides, yul^ar Minds a^ always in pai^ by 
Torture? of their own creatiUg; pr it leaft that 
fn«4lfQ ftrong of the Nurfeiy,tibait aBoy of 
genie would be alba^'d of them-, thefe are 
TenJors of Conference, the Vanity of Immor* 
tg|ity,asif the Soul wcretp ^cany'i froni 
tiieB0dy to feel Tpjr^ents ^^jpaij^bk for 
foll^wii^ the dl^a^e? of Nature in a higher 
gegree than others jas ifan Imjc^teri'^l Being 
(juld be fenfiWe of tuat^rial Fuii8liea€nts,or 
m% it were % ijrpc w o^y'tl^' Jfewraign " 

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44 The Golden Spt. 

Xjlw of Self-prdervation, by the Diredionsof 
that Sclflove^ which is founded on Rea(bn, and 
implanted in all Mankind in i greater or lefs de* 
gree of PerfeSion* Bat a Courtier is free froin 
gU thofe Bugbears of the Priefts, they ad by a 
Spirit fo much above the Vulgar, that they have 
nothing common with thenu Not ixit they 
have fome Appearances that hold a (brtof like- 
nefs to what the Vulgar call Virtues. For Fritnd'- 
fiip they have Complaifance^ Affurances^ and 
wiightj ProfeffioHSy by which if any one be de- 
ceiv'd, it is the fault of his own Ignorance or 
Pride; ignorance, in nbt kifowing that this is oti« 
ly MoJcyOn which no Man ought to look witha 
ftri^is and credulous EyejPride in fancying him- 
felf an Exception to the only general Rule that 
lias none. Vor FiJelky they i»vt Selfltttere/ij, 
a much furer Tye than the Airy Notions of ^q* ^ 
nour and Probity j for as Idng as it b th^ir in- 
tereft to be true td Prince or Acquaiqtai^ce, fo 
long is their Fidelity to be depended i|p6n^ and 
no longer; It is therefore the Duty of tbe Princely 
and Acquaintance^ in regard to th«m(elves never 
to truft or imfploy thofe whofe Intere^ they otn* 
not make to be true and faithful. 

For Religion they have fometimes Hypocrijte^ 
that i$9 where it may be prejudical to their Initef 
reft to confefs the Atheift, and there thQir P^rts 
aYe {o fine» and their Addrefs fo admirable, as to 
impofe on the Credulous the very Works of In- 
fidelity, for the EffeSs of Grac<f, and fo while, 
they play the Devil, pafs fok Ssjints. Infteadof 
that foolifli Principle of for^giving your Enemies, 
^\xiq\x makes a Man only vm Anvil ofMroncs; 

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thofewho are refolvM to thrive, hold it for a 
K^im never to be difpens'd with, that the lead 
Oppofition to their Aims is never to be forgi- 
ven, but revenged to the laft degree : this makes 
them tremble, and all others afraid to engage 
thein,wantofSuccefsin the Attempt being cer* 
tain Ruin. There have indeed beenfbmeFook 
in Poft, who have believM it the beft way to 
take aw^y Oppofers by Obligations ; but they 
are but woful Poli^ticians, not to know that mo& 
Men are more influenced by Fear than Gratw 
tude^or a (enfeof Merit. 

What (bme have argued about a Prince, fome 
good Statfmen hold will reach his Minifiers, and 
fi> by degreesall his Court* and that is, whether 
it is iafe in thefe great Pofts to be lov'd or fear'd > 
bcKh indeed feem very neceflary, but fince it is 
amttter of great difficulty to know the Advan** 
taga of both,; it is fafer to be fear'd than lov'd ; 
for we msty with juftice affirm of Men in gene* 
raf, Tliat they are Ingrateful, Inconftant, DiP 
femblers,Fearful of Dangers,Coveteoi» of Gain : 
While thofe to whom they are obliged are Prol^ 
perous,and out of all Danger, all are obfervant 
, of them, affiduouS) pffering to facrifice their 
Lives and Fortunes, and Children for their Ser- 
vice; but as fpon as ever Evil Fortune ihows her 
Face, and frowns en their Benefadpr,they ali 
fly away, as from Infection and Ruin, and al* 
mollfonVear they ever knew the hopelefs Vi- 
^[imy lb little will they own their Obligations, 
Befides, Men make lefs (cruple of of^nding thofe 
w|io aijqi to be belov'd, thari thofe who endea- 
vour tp be fear*d. For ^*ove is conftrain'd into 
' ■ , fonpa 



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MX3 XOT VJO iO E If OPT. - 

7* ., « . •. • ■,'■,> 

fome Lftw df pQty; but Mankind beiiig kifedetf 
with :ill manner of iDKffionefty, makes no Scrtf* 
^le of breaking that Law oh the very iUgbteft 
Occafion of gratifying his own Profit or Intereftj 
. But on the contrary, Fear is retained in its De^^ 
lerence by jj>Iaciin| perpt^ually before! i^s Eyie 
th^jmagp of the Puniflntient certain, ami fnh 
finding over Us Head: yet is there a Medium ifi 
this t<)0, bot^ for Prince and Nf ihifters, that this 
;^uit be not pufii'd (b far as not only not tq con^ 
diltlte Love, t>ut alfb pro^re Hatred; for it il 
dot inconfiftent thait a Man ihoufd be it the 
&me time iear'd, and yi;t not hated, Tfmt isf 
the Execiitions muft be few and fSidotii 

This being thus pretty well provM, it ^tU b^ 

ho wonder that the moft compleat Statefineh 

have their Bravd's, their lafhtimentsof l^te to' 

PoifoUyStab, or Suffiicate whom ever they pleafi^' 

and that ftand in the way of their P^ide, Liifl or 

Ambition. Thefe things may feem ftrangi; to 

you, Sir, who have not been conver&nt with' 

Courts; but you mufl all know and confider 

that Boola efpecially have fnaCd a ibrt of Men 

who never in Reality exifted^in the World, that 

is Men of Virtue and Honour,Probity,Sincerity4 

without Self-lnterefty and the like. For it is 

certain that the manner of Mens living is (ovtf 

ry different from what the Moral Rules pre* 

fcrib'd for the Model of their Lives, that wfao« 

ever fhould negle^ what is done to purfiie what 

tiught tobe don^ pulls on himfelf a certaih ftpitt 

indead of OonHilting hisown Intereft ahdlii^t^ 

neis, which is a Sin againflhimfelf, and by Coii« 

fequeaceaSin againft Hature; for,fbranyMah td 

b« 

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TV 

^«n Honeft Man amoog fiicb a number tbtt 
9re Difliondlyinuft find birafelf io greacdai^ar 
df Perditioa* 'Tis tberefcve,a neceflary Maab' 
Ub for Princes and Courtiers to confider how 
Itey may be in the number of the later, and tura 
it to their own Advantage. It may be faid thai 
it is to be wiih'd»that all tbofe virtuous Chy- 
tnara*s made by Speculation were in Courts ; but 
fincethofe are not to be had, n(»r maintain'd a* 
gfuoft the very Grain of Humane Life, that Pn»- 
(dencefupplies all their Places, which can (b far 
di%uife their Vices as to avoid their Infamy, suid 
fycutc their Intereft* For it is a great Aocam- 
frfifliment, nay, perhaps the verj^ fupreaoi Pei^ 
ieftionof a Courtier,toknow how to pot onfiich 
Sbapesasmay be conducive to hislncerefl. For 
llksa are generally fofimpleandibobfequiousc^ 
their preient Neceffities, that whoever is a M34 
An'in the Art of Diflembling, will (con fiw) a 
Bubble, who will forrender himfelf to be deceiv'd 
by turn. 

I fliall only name JkxanJerthc fixthPc^ 
oi Rme, in whole Cuftody I was all his Pcfe» 
dam. He was all Impollor, and apply 'd his whde 
Study and kxeroile in all the Arts of Fraud and 
Malice, by which he might deceive all, with 
whom he had totlo ; nor Was hedifappointed in 
findiagSubjed matter enough to work on. No 
Man was ever more officious in hb Ai^verati* 
pm; Aor had any one evo^a more (pecious and 
l^ufible way of taking a folemn Oath;.. nor 
did ever ^^ture produce a Man that, ever per- 
fiMTiii'd lefeof eithoriyetall his Deceit fliUtarn'd 
to his AceottOt^ in bringing him that SQ^cels 

which 



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which he always proposiM; for hewa$perfe(9:ly 
Mafter of the Manners and Nature of Man- 
kind, and of the Art cf Deceiving. 

There's ftill a greater reafon for all of my kind 
to (peak well of Courts^ fince there is ftill the 
Gel Jen Age. Gold governs there with an ab(b« 
lute fway, and with that you may compafi 
whatever you defire, and by your Addrefs and 
Management there, you may obtain that Gold 
which obtains all things; nay, it is remarkablei 
that whereas in all other ftations of Life you get 
Wealth by Labour, and Exchange of one Com* 
modity for another, here you fell nothing but 
Words for it, or Trufts, or Dignities, or other 
Titles which tho' of little value in their owd 
nature^ yet have fuch advantageous Perquifits 
annextto them, that they are very well worth 
the Purchafe. In Traffic or Trade you deal with 
a few, and in Things that are inanimate; but at 
Court you deal in Mankind^ you (ell and buy 
Nations, and make the People your Property, 
while their Seednime and Harveft flow all 
into your Pocket. *Tis true, all have not an 
equal (hare of the Crop, yet thingsare generally 
fo manag'd, that few but find it worth their 
while, add chufe rather to be a Door;keeper 
there, than a Major Duomo elfewhere. 

Not to detain you longer in generals, I/hall 
give you one inllance of the amazing things 
done by a Lady iri Power in the Court of Romti 
who wanting the Prudence of a Man, let her- 
Defires aim too far, and by robbing all, made 
every one her Enemy: Whereas if ihe had fet 
ainy Bounds to her Avarice, ihe might have had 

power 



dbyGoogk 



I anxotyvf 'jjoma ulymma. 49 

j^pwd'and Weskp /<vith feturity^^ fer if 
kny^Favctofite Be w wiioUy- devotea to, Cove- 
teoufnedl, to have ijd regard to any thirigi He 
only heaps RicheS io^ethejt" to fet other fiic- 
ceeding Favpuritesto emplojr their .P6w.er, to 
favifti'frprii them thofe enormous heaps, from' 
tirhidi tlieirill COndua has banifliM all'Peifen-' 
de?s.- Fcif a Courtier mindinor whom He 

))lunders,aridhe that is lUiely to yield t;he 
ow«ft Spoil; i^ the moft likely to be madea Sa- 
crifice to dtlier^i / 

*I%fi,.mfiiny of 'i>^<i Olympia, ^fler^ 
mrm> md Favourite ofTo^ Innocent 
the Xthi 

IN the Time of imdeeiit the >#, 1 ^zi 
pai't of the Cliain ^hich Donna OljmfU 
wore ^hen ihe was yet under thfe Circiim- 
ftaac^s pf n6 extraordinary Fortune, and was 
therefor^ liungutiinherClofet when fhe got, . 
Jewels ihpre rich in her' Adriiiniftratioh of 
the Po^eddm. By which theani I btcartie a 
Witnefs of many of her fccret Intrigues of 
State and Ariioun She was of the Family of 
MdUUehiniy xbait made but a little Figure in 
Kome^ tillflje rais'd it by her Int«r«ft i^itiflf 
Pope*, She was marry d yoUrig, and difco'^ 
tover'd from hfer Childhood an Ambition of 
Rule^ in her Cljildifti Plays alv^^ays giving 
I^ws to her Play-fellOvirs. Being come to Age 
of Marriage, fhe refufing to turn Nua, ^Vas 
iftarry^d to Signior BAmfhilio, Brother td Gib- 

E vanni 



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leXth. jBy)li^mhaviI]|ghad^e- 
s and but one Son. her Aifeffc^T 
to -her Husband, out ftrong to 
le Abbot, aft^^ards BUhop» 
and Pope ; £or the Husband 
1 his Prerogative a$ Ma^er, ne- 
her in any of his Affairs, but 
rer did any thinfl without her 
nadehim in her Eye feiein beau^ 
ing, tho* the moii j^rbidding 
and ugly of any Man breathing ; and her Hus- 
band difguflful and loathfom, tho' ;f M^npf 
tolerable Appwrance. She ofiher wjbnt in 
the. Brothers than Hu&bands C<x^f and was 
morebften with him in the Clofet, .than her 
Husband in Bed ; fo that he frequently could 
not tell where to find either Brother or Wi^ 
they being perpetually together. 

Nor ca^ this, appear fo extraordinary, if 
you do but con/ider. that moft of the Prelates 
of Rome oblige the ambitious Ladies, by adt 
mitting them into their Council, and follow* 

noftbbly andimi 
iJobotPatifphUf^ be- 
dding JPace, could 
I a' Lady of fo mat 
Shape and Perfofl 
herwitliaCharm 
;h or Beauty, ^c, 

iigratefui tpyouta 
laraOier oJf|heNafl 

veyouauAocp^^ 

01 



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%t her Story,; attd (how her. in that Power 
Vhiclrwas fo' foimidable td i^twf, and hatl 
like to have been fo fatal to her felfat the laft. 
In the Company of the Ladies fhe fpoke lit- 
tle, but ihe abundantly retrievM thatTacituf- 
'nityby her Loquacioiifnds among the Men. 
She usM to fay,that fliehad not Words enough 
'to throw a\vavan that Sex, from which fhe 
could learn nothing of Confeguenceor Value. 
Among the Men, her Difcoiirfes were always 
fupported by Reafons of State,and embelhfh'd 
frequently with fome Maxim or Sentence, 
tter Memory wasfo happy, that by reading 
or hearing any thing once over^ fhe wourd ne- 
ver forget it. She ftould not fubmit to the 
"Opinion of another , without doing her 
Temper the laft violence,defiring rather to pe- 
rifh with her own Opinion, than live and prof- 
perby the AdvicTof another. She was co- 
vetous to a degree, fo abandon'd, ti^^| (he 
could not endure to hear any body fo miich as 
talk of or mention the Bounty of others ; nay, 
flie made a Virtueof her Vice,by this Maxim, 
that Women were made to gather together , and not 
to Mfi>erfe, She often chang'd her Servants, 
that they might not by long continuance with 
her grow too familiar with her Condud ; fte 
feldom went to the Balls, Feafts and En^ 
uinihents of the Roman Ladies,that fhe might 
not be obligM to make the like. The Often- 
tatipnofher Charity to the Poor Religious, 
got her fome Reputation of Devotion, tho the 
toeer effea of Yain-glory, never doing any 
Charity that had upt firftbdln carry'd round 
-•• ^ ' E 2 "^ 

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die Palacc;in Proceflion in the Eyes of the Pep- 
pie; but even thofe fhe laid afidcas foon as ftxe 
was got. into the Vatican. Sh^ gave Iier Son 
no Education, fo that he coujd icarce read at 
.Twenty^ kft Learning fhouldroufe his Spi- 
rits, and make him interfere with her in .the 
fnanagemejnt of the !Houfe of Pamphilio^ Her 
.T^ablewas penurious, and yet fhe made Ker 
Steward bring in his Accounts every day to a 
farthing. She was prodigal of Compliments, 
and gave larger Promifes.t^ian any one could 
d^fire of her,^. being admira|)ly dexterous at 
evading all jfhe had lo promised, with Excufes 
adapted to the Perfon and Circumftance of 
the matter. . ' . ^ 

The Abbot FampMia is now made a Cardi- 
nal, and all his Favours difpens'd by Donna 
OljmpU^ who firft taught him the Art of Difli- 
inulation^tho' it be as ancient as principal Cu- 
flpra of the Court of Rome. Toward the later 
end of tJr^^t;* VIII, Hie thought everjr moment 
an Age, fince from a calculation of his Native 
ty file found he would arrive at thehighefe 
JDignity of tlje Church in the 70th Year of his 
age : when Vr^m dyM, and the Cardinals were 
jgoins into the Conclave, ftie took leave of her 
Brother-in-law thus j Perhaps I Jba/l Jbortly Jee 
jm Pope^ but never mare Cardinal Werejvu but 
Fopefs^ replied he, J ipouU mHingly relinquijb my 
Claim. Being contrary to exjpe&ation chofe^ 
Jlie threw open the Gates of her Brother-in- 
law's Palace, to be rifled by the People, With a 
great dcalof feeming fatisfafition, having firft 
fee ur'd the beft and moft valuable of the Good^, 



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The Story oflDonmOLYunA. 5 j 

ihd^ flie had iaid but a few days before,That m 
cmdition her Brother-^m^Um tvere chafe Pope^ fbe 
muld not only ficrifife the Palace^ but herfelf^ to 
fbe People. 

So known a Favourite fooii drew all the Vi- 
fits, arid all the Addrefles of every Pretender, 
to Donn2iOlympid} and the firft thirig fhe pro- 
curM at Court, was^ie Ruin p( the parbarini^ 
Favourites of the formdrPcfp'e, getting their 
Abbeys and other Revenues intp her own pof;, 
feflion, imprudently fliewing ah Example how 
(he. jOhould be usM ner fdf on the'decfeale of the 
prefent Pope her Proteftor ; for Ihe exceeded 
all the BarbariHi had done, and difposM of all 
Ae Court Affairs, public and private : And to 
lecure^em the better, fhe got her Son O/r?///^ 
made a Cardinal, aiid (as hrft Nephew to the 
J^ope) declared Cardinal Patron^ hot out of Af- 
fettion tb him 4s her Son, but to wreft the nu* 
riigemcnt of Affairs out of the hands of PancU 
^w, and put 'em where (he fhould naturally 
.^ifpbfe and direCt^em at her pleafure. 

The Amours ^Camillo andtheTrincefs 
of RoHam. 

gAmillo was a very yonng ^ 
unqualified for^ as little de 
uty ; he liad a Soul more inci 
ot bove than a&irs of State ; h 
already on fire, by the Beauty an 
of the youn'g Princelkof RoJJana^ 
band being ojd, \yas not thought 
V> her Inclination a^aPrincd fo 

* ' ■-. * 

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ro I. DEN OPT. 

i near Relation to tlie Popq^ 
fall that' a moderate Ambi« 

% 

Roff-aM^ befideshis Age, was 
Paralitick Diftemper, 
afin'd him to his Bed J 
young wife, andihe 
n, and being Miftreis 
i,difguisM her Difguft 
with him for a fincer^ 
ftirr'd from him but 
;h, where Camillo was 
her J fq dividing her 
Heaven and Love^ (h€; 
a foihort a time, that 
^enofufpicion of any 
:e than Devotion, 
efings hVd ma'de Lovft 
h their Hearts, CamiU 
ifs i'erion was extteamly charming, biit his' 
ignorantEducationdenied him tholefew Qua- 
lities of Mind t7iat, are more valuable. The 
Pnncefs, befide^ a beautifiil Perfon, was Mi-' 
t?iSu!^J^Wl'h 1°^ ^.Spirit ec^ual 2^ 

was more 
outatalk 
i'd him ta 
utthe'-ol^ 
iibirt^^t^s; 

CamUa iq 
iipport by 
%by haV 

, . . ... ... ■ ymf 

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Yhii&(ny (ffJomta 55 

vfiig her in his Arms ks his own, his Mothcrt 
Ambition interfered ^ithhisPaffion, and^un* 
known to him, has him affumM to thtf Scarlet 
Robe and Hat,, and decl^r'd frfi Nephew and 
Cdrdind PatroH, TKs niade fo mucn noife in 
Rome^tbit the Princefs of Rofiana cdukl not 
long remain ignorant of a Change fo fatal to 
her Repofe; the Rage and Fears it gave her 
were beyond expreffion, but had the ^od for- 
tune to be happily cancelM by the Death o^ 
her Husband, fo tnat they were all taken for 
(Mferings to his Monument, where ftie loon 
after placM him in a magnificent manner, he 
having added all his to her vaft FortuncJi^ 

Notwithffandin^ her green Widowhood, 
fhe Gbuld not refram upbraiding the new Car-, 
dinal with his Ficklenefs and Inhdelity ,wheren 
fore by a Confidant flie fends him this Letter : 

'T*!^ Coniemft is fnorejour due than Anger ^ yet 
-» I cM^t but let you knotv my Refentments *^ the 
form would have me defer my declaring them till the 
Prince has been longer in his Grave ^ yet Anger can- 
net lifien . to the cold rernonftrances of cautious Vor^, 
mdity. TouMen are flrange unaccountable Ani* ^ 
mats. 




amuji 

had ndtfBj my^ when you /eftgn^ 
ma^fterofhonoturable Vretenpns^by preferring Am^ 
bit ion to Love ? Did you think me fuch a, Tr^^ 
that you mi^ abufe my Credulity without anyPu^ 
nifibmenty becaufe tm a weak jVoman^ you a PoPe'^s' 
Nefhet^yand exalted tathefacrid Purple? J^ti/ake^ 
mtyourfetf pr m^ you are not abovt refe^m^//^ 
' ^ V • B 4 nor 

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par luHdhle to re%;.^ngi 
Ij hear what you b4v,e i 
demtJyou. farewell. , ^: 



par lunahle to re%;.^nge; ^l^onfefi^ t would mtting- 
ly hear what you have to L^ i before I utterly con'- 



, He foon retur^M her this AnfMfer^ not a lit- 
tle pleased that fhe \yasnow a Widow, and at 
liberty to difpofe of her fclf according to her 

Inclinations, / 

My charming Princefs, 
r I ,?H6)^ I dread your Amer more than th^t of all 
, j|^" . the Powers on Earthy jet at this time I had 
much rather caufe pur Anger to write ^ than that, 
your Indifference jlfQuld hep you filent : There is a 
Charmtnyour dear Anger ^ that makes me fee I am 
not indifferent to themofi beautiful Princefs in thf 
World. Believe not^ Madajn^ that Ifhtnk nryfelf 
out of the^ reach of your Revenge ^ if I could be vo- 
luntarily guilty of any things that could jujlly fro- 
vokeyour Indignation ; for^ Madam^ you^ttalwaies 
have it in your power toPunijh me^ec'aufeyoi^Jl ever 
he able to make me milerable with a Frown ; but /^ 
beg you tofujpendyour Anger till lam able to con- 
vince you by an Interview ^ where I may tell jou what 
is notfo convenient to commit to Paper ^ Appoint 
your Time^ and I will commit myfelf .toypu^to pu- 
nijh or abfolve 4ts you fhaU find me gmlty or tnm- 
^nt^ Adieu^ ' ' ' 

5 ^vas not a little appeasM- ^h 
>m Cardinal CW/to, and tool?-. 
Him to come the next Evening 
*k to her iPalaceiwhere fhe or^ 
I for Ills private reception* Tii^A 

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The Story «f Thnma Glymfia. 57 

Room (he reccivM him in was all hung witn 
blacky and illuminated with fome few white 
Wax Tapers, where |he attended him on i 
mourning Cduch, in a deje£ted pofhjre, from 
which ihe arofe as he came near her, in a very 
bumble and fubmiffive manner ifUlmj/ Lordy 
feid (he, /V this the Habit of a Lmer? My adofr^T^ 
hie PriMcefsj (replied he, kneeling down ^ncf 
itakine hold of her Hand, on which he fix'd i- 
thouland buf ning Kilfes) this is not indeed the 
tiihit of a Lover worthy jou^ hut of m unhaffy 
Creature made a Viliirn to the Ambition of a cruel 
Mother y n^ho has no regard to the tender Sentiment si 
cfan amorous Soul. Ambition and Avaricf take 
Iff all her Thoughts^ and Nature gives her no cpn- 
f deration for my Tgiith^ Inclinations abhorrent of 
the Dignities to which pehat(^ainjl my will) com^ 
^M me to wrefifrom ihe hands of PanciroUo, tht 
managing of alL Affairs. But (interrupted the 
Princefs) muftwenowjutanepd toallyourVows^ 
and cancel aU thofe AJJurances p^ hav^giv^n me 
of a Faith inviolable r Muft; aH ke fi^rifc'd to 4 
Mother I That wiU indeed be aFrocfofyour Obe^ 
diencejibut how \agreeableto your Honour^ I leav4 
toyourfelf. Alas^Madam^ nplied CamiBoy if 
you ttnyet credit a Man you have but toomuch rea^ 
fojf^ nottp^ ktliweyfincf any thing could make him 
take s flff. th^w4S not anjwerable to that Love 
whiehyoH'have infpir^d^ yet believe me^ JwiHhave 
no regard to her Imfofitions ; Jam notyet bound is^ 
Priefis Orders^ J can but throw uf all thefe fore^M 
Dignities^ and lay apde the Purple^thefi Traffics 
of froud Titles^ if you would but receive m^e i»ta 
nur f^jour^ which lionfejs I havt forfeited. Aji - 
•'.; '" ^ ^ . ' ^ . ^ ■ * ^rr 

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55 . 'a«l<r UOXDEN OPT. 

fifreyourftlfj MiUam^ th^iUUes whoSy i» you f» 

direSfmjf J^nsy dnd J km' eitbm.Camillo youi^ 

Ad^fer $nd Hushmd^ orMfi the wretched Cai?di-«' 

nal l?axroaywbm sBMf PomjertJM sffcfd no fais^\ 

fstBim^ wifjihJt gives you any FAtHy snd deprives 

mei^dll that ha» make me enpe^ Can you fergive 

,me f Can ydti receive me again into Faj/^t^r ?, Can 

yougive me any Hofes^ that IJbaSnoi ItipfMesfigh 

in ijaiffy hut he At lafi fetnUtted to call you mine^ 

mthout fear of Sefaraiion? Speak ^ myXaoddefs^ 

on you only my Fst$ defiendi ; you^ alone can m^ke 

me hafpy or miferahle^ / ^ 

After a Uttfe paufc, with Ijer Face covwM 
withBluflics, atlaftfhe made this Reply. J^f^ 
you J my Lord^ can quit this Gwardeurfor my ahf 
I cannot be Jo ungrateful as to dijirufi the fineeripf 
, i^yourVrof^nf\ ^nd as I then jhould mthrea** 
Jon believe thi^jou lov^dme abo^vi all thin^SyfoI 
do not find anj/Difpojition to make jou a Return un^ 
ftfitabie to your Deferts^ Do ther^ore ntyotsr Lov¥ 
prompts you J keep not my Heart in fufpence^ nfm- 
urge me by Dtffinmlation tb betray myinnocent^en-^ 
timentSy fo as to yield you matter of Triumph ^ and^ 
tne of Dijgrace \ for as I cannot rejif: your^ Ten^ 
dernefsj JoJiiiSnot bearjiour NegleB. . \ 

?Rus<i«*6rfation ended with muttiaj Affu- 
ranees ofiiivioiable Love; and a ccwiveMieat 
timeJfcw the* dfecency of Widbwhood Jbehig 
iiow ovor^ Catfiillo lays afide the Piffplc^ to thcf 
fur priMtt all A4^ jOy of the Princcfs, 
aad the indigimtionof th« Pop^ and Donna 0- 
lympiOj.whQti k&s Marriage to the Frinccfe fol- 
lowed yery near his renunciation^of the Cardi* 
fiaPs Cajp.^ ' TkQ Fope and tus Mother j after a 
...... \ ' ■ ■ i '-^^-' --^ - . lon$ 

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Tbfi Story of Pmta Olympia. 59 

^ngdebate, refolve to baniih both Camilh an4 
thePtincefs, Donna OljmPia fearing the Wit 
and Beauty of thePriiiceis would win. fo on 
the amorous Heart of the ol4 t*Ope, as to be a. 
dangerous Rival of her Ambition ; making no 
manner of doubt, but that the Pope would be 
better pleasM to have to do with a young 
Niece^ than ao old Sifter-in-iaw. 

Thii$ Refdution being taken. Donna Olym^ 
ft A fends for her Son, and in her Clofet accun 
fes him of FoDy and Uiidutifiilnefs, where he 
cave her a fiill account of all theProgrefs of 
nisLove, as l have told you, and beg'd her 
mediation Wiethe Pope, to forgive his fonow*, 
ing the Didates of his ^flion, iuice it lud di-^ 
retted him not only to one of theJBneftand 
mod accomplUll''d Ladies of Rome, butalfo o^e 
of the greateft Fortunes. Bpt Reafon and Na-. 
ture were of little force with a Mother to her 
only Son ;. for, redoubling her Reproaches, Ihe 
bid him be gone and never fee her more, but, 
retire to his ft)athful Grotto's with his fine Wife, 
jind le^ve the World to be manag'd by thofeof 
great^i: Genius: So Ihe flew put of the Qofet, . 
aad left him torefle^l on his Fate, 

But Don^'p/jwfw returned to the K^^/V/w, 
iui(|,fet her fc|lf entirely to make the beft oi 
her Market, and to in^rofs all flie could fcrape 
^<%ether, either by Raillery, Extortion, or 0{k 
preffion. She reduces die Pope's domeftic £x- 
pences, that fhe might pocket all fhe could; , 
pp Judge Criminal was made, but by her rc- 
comijaendation, to whom fhe gave inhuman 
IqftruCtions to gratifie her Avarice, ordering 
i'i>:' '.■.■■! ■ ; ■ •; .i' -■■■ fbem; 

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'*66 • ■51'^ G O I. D E N S P T. ' 

them to 'regard not the Bloo4,, f)iit the Purl^ 
of the Guilty^dmmonly fending to 'em for th^ 
S-edcmptions, pretending' (he \yould lay *eni 
but for the benefit of ' the Poor; fo that th^^ 
Judges aihiing to makfe forhe advantage to 
themfelves of their Polls, brojight E?t<?rtiOn 
knd Oppreflion toits utmoft extent. . In fine,' 
^vhatever Office at Court fell, Doniia hiympid » 
difoos'd of it ; the Officers of thelI)ato'rv wer^ 
to keep thofe in fufpence who pretended, to Ec- 
clefiaftical Benefices, till ftje had fiilly informed 
her feif of their value j and thofe who ofFer'd 
mofty without any cdnfideration of Capacity 
-or Defert. were njadfe Bi^ops, Abbpts^^. but 
they muft firft bring the full value Of thfe^lace, 
feer rates being, that an Officeof looo Crowns 
aY^r, that lafted but three, fhould pt(yher 
one Years Income ; iffixYeai^, double-, and 
fo in proportion: but if it were an Office for 
Life, fhe would hot blufh to ask the Mcriety cS, 
the Revenue for the firH twelve Years: Sopne 
BifhOprick? lay vacant more than five Years 
together, (jhe receiving thij* Profits all the' 
while) becaufe fhe could ho|; meet Witha'Chap"' 
that would *come.up to her ititD^;^ ' ; ;' 

An Abbot of iVi«/>/w'tOrailB4Woop Crown?^ 
for bdnna Olympuht a Bilhbjji-ick; in hefj 
Gift, perfoaded his Brotheris to |6yn in felling . 
all the Paternal: Eitatev tvhiefi, ^it\^ all' their 
Credit, could juft coriie up to the PurChafe ; 
but the Abbot dy'd-befdre he was well fet-- 
tied ih his Seati'Mfhich by that means return*d 
to Donna OijmpA^ and me foojj'fold it a^ain 



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i)r the feme fum, while the Abbots faoHfh Fa* 
mily w^s Wf^^ ^y his Ambition. 

The faiiiPancefs her D*ughter-in-Iaw had 
by this tioi^ a ^ufly Boy, bqt her Malice gave 
tot to the Pope and maw others,- that !>» 
CAmiUo was Jncapablepf (jeheradon, and that 
the Princefs muft have found fome more fub- 
ftantial hplp t6 impregnate her. This was 
believ?d by the Pope, bec^ufe flie {aid it, but it 
did hot mSiU^ct^CAmilloXQ a Jealoutie be was 
otherwife apt eiaough to en|:eitain,but in pique 
of honour itreviv'dhis nowlanguifhing Lpve» 
^d made his Princefs have a fhort ceilatioii 
of thofe ill Humpiirs which PoiffejEon had fu^ 
ter'd at l^ft to appear. Tho flie gained nothw 
point \Ti embroiling the Haj^inds of fo near 
a Relation, file purfuM that of her Avarice fo, 
impetuoully, that the Prifons were fiiU of Ibk 
flocent Perfons, and the Streets of the Guilt]r^ 
thefe preventing their Confinejment by a Brifa!e^ 
and tho^ conrirainM to remain in Cuftody tiH^ 
they could purchafe their Enlargements. 

But there was a Roman Gentleman, confix 
dent of his own Integrity, fworethat Donna 
OljmpU fhould never touch a farthing of his 
Money; ^nd to fecure this, took his Son from 
a Clerk's Qffice, which he was in, left he 
fhould beobiigM to make any Petition to her: 
But all in vain, Donna OlympU was not fo ea-» 
fily to be avoided, for ftie hearing his Relblu- 
tion, foon drew him into her Net. She or- \ 
dcrM a Sbirrato pick a Quarrel with him, and 

give hini opprobious Language, which the 

Gentleman being unable to bear, correfted 

hin^ 



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<-. 



]^m with a Box or two on the Ear* He ^s^ 
upon this feiz'd, cafrjrM to Prifon, and con- 
^emn'd to dye for contempt, and ftrikisg a 
fhiblic Miniifter ; fo that to lave his Life, he 
#as obligM to pfeferit Donna OljmfU with a 
Purfe, and pay a confiderable Sum into the 
Exchequer. 

' T6u may perhaps wonder, Sir, at a Woittart 
paft threeicore years of Age toiling iiight and 
day,without alfowihg her felf any Reft, when 
file could not make ufe of what me had alrea-' 
dy attained. But, Sir, if you meafurc thii 

. Condud of Courtiers and Favourites' by cOm-^ 
mon Sehfb and Reaibn,you would make them 
&ad People. But they have aPIeafiirc pecu- 
liar to themfelyes ; for great Power arid great 
Riches are tilings that yield more HcafiirC 
arid Satisfaftion than the reft of the World 
imagine. What tho* the People were lb pro- 
vok'd by her Thirftof Gold, that when they 
ftw her Coach pafs by, they came up rudely 
to't,, and caDM her Wnore, and were fo rude; 

' ■ that fhe was fain to make her Elcape to a Mo^ 
iialhy,and fo to the Palace, and have his Holi- 
riefe to (jualify their indignation with a Daub 
of a qiiaritity of Bread. Nor did ftie mind 
the fcurrilious Ballads fung of her a tot the. 
5itreets all the Nights; thofe difagreeable 
Thoughts being loft in her Power, fmce there 
\Vas no talk in the Palace but of Donna Oljimfh\ 
DoiaoiOljimpia here. Donna Olj/mpia there, all 
Letters were deliyer'd to Donna OljmfU; 
Memorials were no longer given to the Pope^ 
tut to"D0tiin2i0lj!ntpia, Prdcnts were dail/ 
■ mount- 



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m^^pting the Stairs of the Vaficatf, whence 
noof <^ver rfturxi?d. The& G}|:^ie& made 
lPoDJaatr0jn*fi^ an ample amisnds for the hate 
ipf the.Peppk. laf^oK, fhe got iq<^ Ten 
Pays ,l)^rePQpe Jnmeftf dyM,rhalf a MilUo* 
Ofc Mqn^ ; e^iy .one: Hiding haft to purchafe 
while yfet Donna Olympa. could fcU^; Among 
the 1^ theHB was a Canon who had mgde a- 
t>ove^ni^undred ApI^iCf^tions for a^^fhopt^idl 
in vaJ^n, projBFeri^g Donna OlymfU bw 5000 
Crq^n?^ jvherea^iijie! demandwl; ^ght, and 
tho',^e,'advanc'4 tQi6ooo, fhe would by 00 
m^^ap^te the twp thoufand, till now, the 
]^op^ W^si dying,;, ftie fent for him jtD come to 
be^, a;Q4 ^^^^ mtnifyethe contHoju'd inthe 
lanye' mind^ bur finding him alittl^.cod ia 
thp;5ijaiKer,afluring her, that through a vior 
'tot "Temptation of the Flefli he j»d ipent 
two th^pj&ndon afairLady for the favours 
Ibe had granted him. Well, welL j(faid Donim 
Qlymfi^^thtn you hayefoqF thouiand left,iBalce 
hafte and bring thiem to me, that you olay not 
lofe what I have ^us long kept for you, for 
I would not lofe the Satisfkuion of having 
prefeated fo. worthy a . Man to the Hlhoprick, 
while the Church wants fuch aUePaftors as 
yoii^ Thus he was declarM Bp.the minute 
fie gave;iptp Donna Olympiads hands the 4poo 
Crowns^.. ! 

^ ']pie Pope dying, after three mohths com 
teft JlexMfder the Vllth was chofe,he b^an to 
pro&(nite heron millions of Complaints, but 
the j?h^ue ifiterrupted the Caufe, by carry» 
ip^oS.u<mmOljfmpUsxOrviato, , . 

Here 



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■ . . ■• . '.": • ; ' ' i'f^ ''■. 

Here iny little Ko»i» Kecd riiade i ftojfj 
^nd lexprefs'd my Satisfkdion at aaAccdum,- 
whicKcontain'd w odd a Story as that of Ohmi' 
Mtf, valuing thy fclf on my own Happihe^ of 
being no ftibjeft where rach arbitratydqings 
might take {ilace. . 

Your Aoman Cdurticrs (began the Lotek^d*0r) 
is ibmething dj^er^nt ftdrn*. an^ of Ftmccj 
you have nothing in chacci^ thare bKit Money 
and Power ; we have often more gay Puirluits ; 
at leaft'we mingle a Gallant Air with^durfe-i 
vereft PoUdcs. Monf. 'Buquet was a very 
great Favourite, and Interidant of tH^ FinaiA'' 
ces; he had Ambition enoilgh; and niade ufe 
of* the Happinefs of having his Mailer's Ear 
to the Advancement of mahy of his Creatures^ 
JFor it is natural for all Minifters of Stdte and 
Favourites to place their Friends and Crea- 
tures about the Prince, becaufe they are Sjnel 
on their Enemies, and fortHy their own Intis* 
refls. It is true,tluit it isd^gerOus foi^ a Trmdi. 
to ha^ie the Creatures o( any one FavdufiiH^ 
pnly about him, they locking more ori the In* 
tereftof him that immediately rais'd them, 
than the Service of the Prince, who was but 
the diftant Caufe of their Advancement ; they 
only ferve fw Watchmen about the Soveraign, 
cafting Nets, Chains and invifible Hands up-' 
on him, fhutting up his Prince by this means. 
ThisMethod gave Monf. Fwjw«f ^"^^ ^ 
all the Extravagance of his Ajnours* There 
was no Lady at Court, that had aaylhareof 
Charms, but he felt a Tendrc for her j aor any 

eat 



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due whom he &nci^, but he attempted ; not* 
attempted any one, but he coriquer'd ; jSJot bjr 
tte fieauty or Comliaefs of his Perfon,for that 
was Fery difagreable ; nor by the Vigor df his 
Youth, orFinenelsofhisAddrefs, for he Was 
above fifty, and unhappy in a very Unharmo- 
nious Utterance: But having the whole Ex- 
dieouer of Ffance at his command, he was 
Majter of manypieces of this excellent Gold of 
which I hive already difcours'd. Nor is the 
Wonder extraordinary,' that Court Ladies ar« 
fo complaifant, to prdtitute their Bodies to the 
'moft powerful Man of the Court, who could 
ufe fuch prevailing Arguments as Pijloles to 
oampafs liis Ends. 

Tjf Story of Monf. Foucquet and Madam 
..;;'• the Countefs of 

^Vrr what was now extraordinary, wasT 
I Tiis Amour with Madam the Countefs 
., a I:Ady of a great deal of Beauty, and 
nolefs renown'd for her Virtue than her Wit 
and Underftanding. She never came to Town, 
but liv'd in a Country Seat with her Husbknd^ 
who was a Gentleman of an ancient Family,' 
and had long held his Title, but his Eftate Was 
very much IhatterM, and fcarce fuMcient to 
keep 'em in that Splendour whith his Quality 
required. 

It happened that Monf. Foucquet, in his Pro- 
gfefsy came to her Husband's Chateau, aS the 
oWy place fit to receive hifn in thofe parts ; his 



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Reception was anfwerabk tt> his Digaity, and 
tlie hopes the Count had that this C^J^srtuBity 
might be fo improved, as one day to Mit him 
into a Poft that might fiipply thfe defras of his 
Eftate: ( tho'in that he might have been de- 
ceived, had not his Lady's Eyes bfougjte ftron* 
ger Arguments for his Service than his Merit, 
fince Meyit is a thing littJe minded by Cour- 
tiers.) 

^ By that time the Count had a little rdfrefli'd 
theStatefman, Sup{>er was ready; ahd, to 
make the Entertainment Compleat^ Ivladam 
the Coumefs was *at the head bf th« Table. 
MoriC Foucquer^thd^ fomethii^ tirM with the 
fatigue of his Journey, yet he wasextreamfy 
fenuble of her Charms ; every Look he caft on 
ker^ and e'ry Word flie utterM, encreasM his 
Flame ; fo that by that time Supper was o- 
ver,and his Appetite fatisfyMwim mating, his 
" IS fuller of Love. He had not been 

1 Succefs in his Amours,and therefore 
bfs doubt of the like iii this. He only 

to find foftie means of delaying Ws 

2 a little wliile, till he could either 
the Husband to Court, or the La- 

; Bed* And he was not long about 
sr; for walking after Supper with the 
happy Pair in the Garden, he ^ret^^d^d to 
flip and fprain his Ankle, fo much that he was 
carryM to his Chamber, and there attended 
both by the Count and his Lady, they hof^tig 
by Afliduity at this Occafion to lay foine Ob- 
ligation upon him to have a fevourabte Ey« 
i:o their Affairs. -^ 

This 



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■ This pretended illnefs kept him there fome 
daf^ while the diligence of his feir Hoftefs 
gave him frequent opportunity of telling her 
his I^flion,und that he was the greateft wretch 
alive without her immediate Compaflion. Gal- 
fejitrysof this Nature, tho* not fo common in 
fhe^ountry as Gity, yet enougli cftabiifh'd, 
e'rf' where in France^ made all his AddrelTes 
^h for Compliments of that Nature. But the 
Cbunt^fs being left with him oneday/«and 
iio bodyby but' his own Servants, they had 
tl» wit to withdraw by degrees till they left 
him alone. XVheri he prefs'd his Paflion with 
an the Eloqence he had, he fekM her 
Hknd,ajndgaveit a thoufand Killes ; nor fatis^ 
fy'd with what but enflam'd him more, he 
ravifh'd fome from, her rofie Lips, which fhe 
receiving with the utmoft difdain, was lea- 
ving theRoom,but flie could not difengage hef 
felf from his Arms in a minute ; which time 
he us'd to mollifie her back with affurance of 
aprefent of 20000 Louis iaf'Or^j for the Favour, 
which would bfe a: Profit not Injury to her 
Husband, whofe Eftate ftood in need of fo 
powerful a Relief. She by this time had got 
free from him,and left the Room,which Monf. 
Fousquet did not at all endeavour to hinder, 
affuring himfelf that he had fliot fuch a gol- 
den Dart at her Perfon, that the more fhe re- 
flefted on it, the more favourable Eifefts her 
Thoughts would produce. 

The Count i-eturmng, found his Lady in 

Tears, and with rib little difficulty got out of 

•her the Caufe* The Count had been at Court, 

Fa and 

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.JL §^W "^m^ \^ JL^ JL0 A^ A-n «^ 



a nd knew what a latitude was there allowed 
in Addrefs to the Ladies^nd was not therefore 
much furpriz'd or difpI^sM at the Adven- 
ture. The Twenty thoufand Louu d^Or^s are 
perpetually in his Head, and he began to rea- 
fon a little Philofophically on the Subjeft* My 
Eftate is eating out with a deep Mortgage ; I 
have not hopes of any Redrefs in a R^empti- 
on J am out of all waysof Prefernjent; here arc 
20000 Piftoles in fubftantial good Goldman Ac- 
my enough to drive away all my Neceflities ; 
the obliging the only, Alan that can make my. 
Fortune, and raife me to what height he 
pleafes^. And what he feeks, what is it ? a 
pleafin^ Theft of an imaginary Treafure, for 
which he pays jne with a real. It is what I 
may lofe whenever my Wife pleafes, to fome 
Scoundrel for nothing. I have no other Te- 
nour of it but her Will or Humour. 'Tis true, 
fhe has yet been very virtuous ; at leaft I have 
not been able to difcover the contrary ; and 
that is all the Ground I have for my Satis- 
faftipn. But if. fhe has hitherto been Chafie, 
how can I be fure but my Page or my Chap- 
lain may find an opportunity of pleafmgher 
fome time or other, and if a wanton one likes 
her Man, Ihc will deny liim nothing. Since 
therefore the trifle is fo fmall, that Foucquet 
would give fo much for, and that very trifle 
depends on a fecurity io much more trifling, 
a Womans Virtue, that is Humour, I think 
it is the white f^ot of my Fate, and not to 
make ufeofit to my own happinefs,would be 
a fin againft my felf. . 

' Arm'd 



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M(mJ. FouCQyEt''j Amours, 69 
Arm'd with thefe 'good Rcfolutionsj he 
charg'd his Lady to be as complaifant as flic 
cpuld, and to raife his Defires, and by that 
means his Price ; and let her know,that if Ihe 
fliQuld liften to the Statefman*s propofals fo 
far as to furrenderher Perfon into his Arms, 
prorided fhe fecurM the Sum, he fhould count 
it rather an Obligation than an Offence. She 
exprefs'dherRefentment at his Bafenefs to a 
yeryliigh degree, and could not be brought 
into his Company while fhe ftay'd, except at 
Meals, whence fhe alwjys retir'd as foon as 
they were over. 

The Count in the mean while addrefs'd to 
hucquet for fomePofl of Honour, tliat might 
put him into a capacity of Retrieving his fin- 
teBg Family j and the Courtier havingan Eye 
tolas ownhappinefs, gave him fuch AfTuran- 
ce$,that he did not doubt of Succefsat his 
coming to Court. It was now titpe for Monf^ 
Fmquet to leave the Counts Houfp, which he 
did with all the Regret in the World, alluring 
the Count, that he fhould no fooner come to 
Court, but find Preferment ready for him. 

The Count flay'd no longer after him 
man to fettle his Affairs, for an Abfence he 
*^d fome Reafon to hope would not be very 
ftort. He and lijs Countefs being corne to 
Town, Monf. Foucquet prpvided him a Regi- 
ment for the firft Step,which pleas'd the Count 
w> well, that he allowed him all the fr& accels 
f his Hoiife that he could' defirc ; but flill 
*ound the Lady obflinate. The Count was 
?9wgonc'to the Campaign, zsid tmcquet 

F '} try'd 

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yo Ti^e? Go L 1>EN Sp Y. 

tty'd all the means the Invention of Defire 
could prompt, but could not mafter her obftir 
nacy. In the midft of this conteft. News isi, 
brought her of the Counts being kilPd in the 
firft Encounter he was in. The grief of her 
AVidowhood, and the decenCy of Religion 
put a Neceflity on Monf. Foucqtm to forbear 
his Vifits. But the Mourning was not quite. 
over for her Husband,eVeill news was brought 
her out of the Country ,that the greateft part 
of the Eftate left her by her Husband was 
feiz'dby tht Mortgagees. This news was not 
unwelcome to Foucquet^^ he therefore having, 
advanced his Price now to 6cooo Louis d^Qf^s 
fhe fent him this Letter, which was found a- 
mong his Papers when he fell into Difgrace. 

TourFerjonlhate^ yoar.Moheyl have occapon. 
for^ wherefore if you bring the 60000 Louisi 
d'Or's with you ^ you Jball mt depart mthout your 
odious Satisfaiiion^ 

The next Evening MonC Foucquet was ad* 
mitted,aild having given her in Bills, Jewefe^ 
and Money the Sum agreed upon,theCouatcfs 
conduftedhimup to her Bed-Chamber, and^ 
with a great deal of Reludance furrender'd 
her beautiful Perfon inta the Arms of the* 
only Man in the World flie had an averfionto. 
But fhe ftay'd no longer in Paris than tatak<^ 
one to difcharge the Mortgage and return 
her Money into' the Country • Where fliQ 
led a veiy penfive and folitary Life, till ih^ 
was vanquifh'd by the vigorous a4dreifes of 
a jolly young Chevalier, who marry ^d and bu-^ 
rfd her in afew years'Time* : . > • . 

•■■ ^ ■''..://: •:; ^ ^ 

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But that you may not ontdo me in a Female 
Favourite (purfiiM my Lm^ d^Ore)! fhallnot 
oniit the MarchioitefsD'i#iirrr,to whom I be* 
longM from her Rife to her Execution. 

She was a Lady of the Bed-Chamber to 
Maria de Medicis^ and fq very much in her F*» 
vour, that marrying Concbim an JtdUpy as 
(he likewife was, fhcraisM him to the digni- 
ty of Marflfdl of Fr^/wf , and thence by her In- 
itereft with the Queen, over whom fhe had an 
abiblute Afcendant,to be prime Minifter, and 
to have in his Power and Gift all the great Of- 
fices of the Court and Kingdom, which are ve- 
ry numerous, and capable of making a great 
train erf Dependants; which difquieting the 
Princes of the Blood, more provokM by the 
Infolent Carriage both of him and his Wife, 
they ftrove in vain to put them out of the Fa- 
vour cvf the Queen Regent ; fo that they fliot 
him in the very Palace, and try M, condemned 
and beheaded hen 

While yet fhe was in lier Profperity, fhe 
was ^^reamly foolifti in her Avarice ; encrear- 
iing by her Oppreffions and fordidDeeds that 
Envy which naturally great Power and Fa- 
vour pi-oduce. There was no Degi-ee of Men 
but felt tlie EfFeft of her Covetous Temper. 
Tradefinens Bills were never half paid, tho' 
sillreckonM to the Queen: Whatever Gifts 
theC^ieen bcftow'd^ two thirds fell fhw^timo 
her hands, and the Receiver thought hirafelf 
well d^witli, if a third came to his. There 
wis a young Qentleman that had got toge* 
Iher live or i^ bundered Louis d'Ora^ and an- 

F 4 PT^ 

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'Ji X VC VJ O X. £ M %J y X. 

ply'd toherLaqueytopurchafea Place for his 
luDriftance. He was told, that the beft way 
of prefenting, was,to buy fomefine Diamond 
Ring, in wmch having kid out ^oo of his 
Louis ePOres, he brought it to the Marchionefs 
^Ancre, who having furvey'd it, gave it a 
thoufand Praifes,and told the young Man,that • 
he could not have given lefs for it than 500 
Pfjtoles : he willing to magnify his Prcfent, af- 
fur'd her, that flie had gueft the Price moft 
fexaftlv. This v/as what Ihe defir'd, fo prai- 
fing the Jewel again, IhereturnMit, and told 
him, that Ihe hatfinuch rather have the value 
in Gold,fince fhe had fo many Jewels alrea- 
dy, that (he did not know what to do with 
them. The young Man was free to difpofe 
of his Ring to fome lofs, and fo making up 
the Sum, delirerM it to her* in Gold, and h^ 
had the Place he defirU 

The Fatal Ra^e, 

T Here was another young Gentleman^ 
all whofe Revenue depended on an Of- 
fice in the Parliament of Paris, in which he 
had a quarter-fliare, and on another Man's 
Life; however, he joyns with all the Paten- 
tees,and undertakes to foUcite a frejih account 
of more Lives in Reverfion. He applies to 
the M^c^mfsiPJttcre^s Agent, and agreed for 
<oo Piples ; but his Ijidy in the mean whife 
mving notic^of thie matter, aiid Ending flie 
«Kuld fiet more Money for it,' makesa Crea^ 

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Ibe Jtatal Rape. j2 

The bargain being thus made, the young 
Gentleman was furprizM at the difappointr 
ment, and foon finding whence the Blow 
came, very boldly wrote the Marchipnefe 
D^Jncre the following Letter, which conjing 
to her in the Church, as fhe could not {ox^ 
bear reading of it, fo could flie as little for- 
bear tearing it in pieces when fhe had rca4 
it* 

/ rvijh jou^ Madam J a long continuance cfthoj} 
great Favours you poj[efs in her Majefij^ and 
tha\ by A£ts of Goodnefs and Kjndnejs you may 
ferfetu ate your Memory to Pofierity. But it has 
ken the Misfortune in all Ages of Perfons of your 
txdted Station^never to hear the Complaints of the 
hjurUy till they became fo univerf4j that nothi?^ 
ht their Difplacing or Ruin could aPpeafe the i^ 
h^d people. That you may not be igngroflf^ 
Mddam^ in apiece of Injuftice lately 4one fo me^ 
Imujl inform you^ that I ha^ abfolutely agreed 
with th^ Marfhal's Agent ^ and with his Confenf^ 
for the place that Madam dc *^^^ , has for your 
lady big^d in her nami, I de fire you would d^ 
mjufiice^ and not profiituteyour CharaSierfor 4 
Jrim^k^lotP your purfuit. 

ib^s Gentleman had a beautiful young 
Wife, whom he hadnotloag marry'd, who 
by a Relation being introduced to the Mare^ 
fihal^ fo pleaded her Cafe, that fhe at once 
ConvincM his Judgment of the Injury he had 
done her, and his Heart, that he fhould at- 
tempt yet a greater. For being flruck with 
jviolentPamon for the young Lady, he was 
fefolv'd to gratify j^s Inclinations ^phe e^T 



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74 T7)^ Golden S p r* 

j)enceof the Happincfs of the Lady arid tier 
Husband. He therefore gave her hop^s of 
fucceeding in her Petition, and orderM her to 
come again when he had made a full enquiry 
into the matter. The time being come, and 
the Marefchat having prepared all things in 
order to the farisfying of his lafcivious De- 
fires, fome Ladies were ready to receive the 
poor Vi6i:im,and amufmg her Innocence with 
pleafant Raileries and Stories, t^ok herinfen- 
fiWy from thofe that came with her, and had 
jher into the Lady's Apartment ; Where ha- 
ying refrefliM her with a noble Collation,thejr 
i:ookcareto fpicefome of her Glajffes with a 
foporiferous Potion that would not work im- 
mediately. Thence therefore they went to 
bathinaB^/^/t^ftrow'd a:ll with FIowers,ahd 
Icented with delightful Odours, they wafhM 
her with rich Watei-s, and having all done 
the fame, they lay down each on a Couch foir 
a few moments in loofe Linnen Garments, fit 
for the Heat of the Seafon and Place. - The 
Opiate now workings the Ladies withdrew, 
and the Marquefs all uhdreft came^ ai*d ekfriy 
takes poflemon of theunreiiftingfairone.But 
JicS W2^s not eafily fatisfyM with viewing fuch 
naked Beauties, which nothing couM equal 
among Womankind, and repeated his Em- 
braces till he found the ' Pbtion gave way tq 
the Power of Nattfre, and that ftie in the 
midft of his Careffes gave him a Return that 
he did not expeO:. But the fury being over, 
he found that fhe wa$ not well awake, andicf 
left hef to coflae to her felf- 



i?yhc^ 



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^ The Fatal Rape: 75 

. W%ii flie was now perfoEHy awake, llicf - 
finuid her fdf in a pofture that was fomething 
iunufiial, and was fenfible by foqie Remains 
land Tokens, that foul play had been oiFer'd 
her. However, hearing fome-body coming 
in, Ihe diffembled a while as if ftie yet was 
afleep; when the M^r3^/y^y},not yet fatiated with 
Enjoynlent, affaults her afrefti, and tho' fhe 
ftragled fufficiently and cry'd out, yet he 
! . amM his lewd will, and had the pleahiue of 
tong her Eyes,, tho' full of . Rage and Indig- 
Wtion, while he felt fuch Tranfports that 
fionebut happy tx)vers can guefsat; ftrug- 
lmg,at laft fhe ftew from his Arm$, but knew 
not what to do with hei' felft She ctirs'd her 
fomine, calFd him aU the treacherous Vil- 
litos fhe could think of, and thofe abomina* 
We Women who had betray'd her thus to 
Jluin. No Ruin, my Dear, (reply'd he) can 
come near the Woman whom the Marquefe 
PA»cr€ fecures in his Embraces. May all thci 
Curfes of thelnjurM overtake thee(interrupted 
fee) and mayft thou fall by the Hands of tome 
Affaffine, or rather Common Hangman. He 
prtfs'd to kifs her and renew all his Dalliances, 
m hopes to appeafe her Grief by making her 
Guilty by her own confent, but all in vain; 
Ihe' was inexorable, he as outragious; tearing 
*ff herloofe Garment, and leaving her beau- 
|8ous Form all naked td his Eyes, (he fle<| 
iato tli« Bath to hide Iter felf ; he throwing off 
his Garment,purfues her into the Element of 
Waves, but there with ftrugling with him flic 
l^as ftr^ngled in tl» War^i^s. and he in ^ fnght 

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^6 The Golden Spy. 

tetires, and comes to the Inftrumcilts of hi$ 
ViUany, bids them to try if there wcire any 
Relief, but in vain, tlid poor Lady was ftone 
dead, and ^in the J^ight thrown into the 5eMr, 
and being fo found,was thought to have been 
murder'd for her Chaftity. But the Husband 
having in vain follicited for Juftice, had no- 
thing to truft to but Patience, till the Crimes 
$f all had brought 'em to a fatal and ignomi- 
nious end. 

. My little Piece, with a true French Loqua* 
cioufnefs would have gone on, but that tbt 
Gumea now urgM his Right and Turn of DiA 
cpurfe, and that fince I had out of Civility to 
Foreigners given tliem the preference of fpeak- 
ing, that they on their fide fliould have fo 
much Moderaticmand Manners, as to be coh- 
^ent with what they had faid without taking 
up too much of th^ Night in their own Rela- 
tions. This bluff Reproach made all be fi-. 
Ipnt, when I encouraged my Guinea to go on, 
and let me know what powerful things this 
Gold had effefted in this our Wprld,as well as 
in the Greater of the Continent. 

I fhallfirft (reply'd the Guinea) fay fome- 
thing of a Court in General, as the Signior 
li?LS done, tho' I ihall differ with him in my 
Septiments of the Excelknceof either the pon'r 
dud or Principles of mofl Courtiers. This , 
other World of E^^land is as much difl:ind 
from the Continent in Happinefs and Liberty^ 
as in Situation. The Name at leafl: yet re*-, 
mains l^ere.and the Thing, tho' often invadtt^ 
jn almofl c ry Reign, yet has ever triumph'^ 

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to the end, and brought its Enemies to Sham? 
and Confafion. A Court therefore here is of 
a different Nature to what it is in an arbitra- 
ry Government J- for here the Courtier or Fir 
voufite has a. harder part to play to come off 
with Credit and Succefs,than in Itdj or France^ 
wher^ they need only the Art to wheedle and 
impofe on the Prince, and they are Maftei-s 
of their Defires. But here the Courtier, Statef- 
man or Favourite muft have as carefol an Eye 
to the Good-will of the People, as to the Far 
vour of the Soveraign, or their Profperity wiU 
be of a very Ihort date, 'Tis true, the Englifk 
Favourite may not be one jot honefter than 
iitc Italian or French ; may believe as little in 
God j and the Duties of Religion or Morality ; 
may be as voracious and as infolent as either ; 
bitt then he miift endeavour to alTume Popular 
ftinciples, declare for the Laws and Liberties, 
pt on the Vizor of the Patriot, to win the 
People into a Credulity of the juftnefs of his 
Defigns and Aftions, and then he works with 
fafety, becaufe his Mifcarriages and Rogue- 
ries, if difcover'd, will be turn'd on the ]VIar- 
lice of the contrary Party ; and he will have 
the Party that is ftrOngeft forget his Crimes 
in his Misfortunes, and clear him of all Impu- 
tatioijs he atchiev'd for a Popular Name. 

I would not. Sir, have you imagin that I 
^ve been fo httle acquainted with our Court 
ia all Ages, as not to know that Jvarice^Trea- 
cherjj Dijjimulation^ Ingratitude ^ Falfe Fromifes^ 
and Poyfonings too, have had place here as well 
as ia Italji or France ; but I can fay in general, 

that 



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that our Courts have been freer from Bkd 
than thofe, and outwitting or undermining a 
Man has often been the extent of the Reveng* 
erf the moft inveterate of our Favourites ; nay^ 
dhfc Pbople have generally been fatisfied with 
themeer difpltcing of evil Mimftgt^, withdift 
puni(hing 'cm- for Oimfes A^Iiich naturaHf diJ^ 
lerve the Worft of Deaths, bat 4eavi)ig' them 
to enjoy in a Rfetreat what ^they kavc fpoilM 
the Public of \^hen in Office. Whether thii 
he an Argument ^ their Goo(dnefV'-br Folly, 
I lekve to your Judj^ent. But if Reward 
and Funifhiftertt fafe the life of good Difciplin^ 
certainly the Engl^ have always wanted it 
moft of any People alive. 

I (hall not detain you here with a Difcourfe 
I heard once fpoke to a great Prince in this 
Realm, to prove to him, That it was direSly 
contrary to the very Dutjrof a King^ to hear 
.any particular Favourite^ firice the Prince be- 
ing made for the Peoples Good, that^s the only 
^End he ought ever to purftie : For 'tis impol- 
iible that any Favourite, who has' fo many 
fay-Ends of his own, ftiould ever lay before 
the Prince the Real Good of his People; that 
is only to be known by leaving his Ear open 
to all, to the public Reprefentations of the 
People, and to all thofe whom Birth and Dig*- 
nity have brought to a Right of Admittance to 
the Princess Ear, as well as his Peer^. 

This does not exclude a King fi-om implod- 
ing oneMinifter more dsfem another,becaufe^tis 
certain one Man has a greater Capacity than 
another, and by confequence more fit to be 

im- 

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imploy'd. Difmifling therefore thele nice 
pmiA% I ihall only ^ive you fome account of 
the Power of Gold in thefe Nations. 

And firft, I fhaU ihe^ you not only a Fe- 
male Favourite of this Nation, as voracious as 
your Olympia ovd^Jncre^ but whole Fariidmems. 
fdilin^ their native Liberty for Gold and Fa^ 
vour with the Prince. Wnat is it for a Wo- 
njan to furrender her Honour for a Bribe otom 
portionM to her Wifhes? But for Men ot E- 
iktes to part with the Security not only of; 
theniy but their Lives, for a Bribe, which very ^ 
&ibe is not fafe in their ha&ds by that means^ 
is a Miracle that only Englijb Gold ca^ per* 
f(Srm, 

But to make a right progrefs, I ihall begin 
with my Female Favourite; 

Edward in. was a Prince who for many 
Yea« made the moft glorious figure in tte 
World of any that fete on the Englijb Throne 
fince William the Bafiard^ yet in his declining 
Years a Lady had the good Fortune to capti- 
vate his Heart, in fo powerful a degree, as to 
fuilv his paft Glories, and ^ve the State fome 
Dmurbances, which were complained of in 
Pirliament till Ihe was banifbM die Kingdom* 
I was then part of a Gold Ring wliich fhe 
^ways wore on her Finger, and fo I had the 
opjbrtunity of being a Witnefs of all her Afti- 
OBS. InherPerfonlhe was graceful beyond 
any equal, enclining tq tall ; her Skin white 
as the driven Snow, her Hair Jet, her Eyes a 
huffiuiftiing Hazle, per Teeth even as Pearl, 
and of that very colour : henCheeks vermi- 

Uon'd 

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lionM oVwith Nature's moft exquifitePamtf 
iier Lips as ruddy, and her Breath a^ fra- 
grant as Rofes ; her Hand fmall, her Fingers . 
taper^ her Foot little, her Leg exadly turn'd, 
her Wafte fl€nder,her Bofom full, and Breafts \ 
hard and round, her Neck proportion'd ; in 
ftort, her Features were perfeftjnbr any file- 
iniih to be found in any JPart about her; fo 
that if any thing could cxcufe the old King^ 
fuch an Angel as MictA Ferrers mighty but 
Kings are not Matters of their own Aftions 
nor Paffioiis, they ought to be more mottify'd 
than we fuppofe the Carrhufiam^ or than the 
Stoic vionld be thought : at leaft, if they yield 
to a Paffion, it ought to oe bounded with fiich 
Caution, as not to reach the Public. But 
King Edmrd^s Dotage of Reign grew more 
ftrong, as his Body grew more weak ; and the 
lefs he was capable of pleafing a feir Lady, 
the more he was fond of retaining her. But 
tho^ this Lady had all thefe Charms of Per- 
fon, yet her Mind Was wholly disfiirnifh'd of 
all thofe Graces, which Ihould h^ve confirm^ 
her Merit, and made her truly defirable. She 
was a very Female Cataline^rpvofafe of her 
own Riches, and voracious of others j as Ihe 
could give Wounds to others,fo was her Hear^^ 
extreamly capable of receiving an amorotfS 
Impreflion; nor would Ihe ever difappoint fcer. 
defires by needlefs. Scruples of Honour) ot' 
Fear that the King ftiould ever hear of her. 
Intrigues. Yet this it is to be Whore to a 
King; her Vifits were admitted by the moft 
virtuous, and flie was carefsM by all the La^ 



dbyGoogk 



1 oe cjngujij remote reevoKme, frr 

! of Quality. The King in hdnbur of het* 
id proclaim'd jf«/?/ and Tourna,me»ts in Smiths 
feldf and this Lady being rhide Lady of the 
^A^,rode from the Tower of Lomio» throtigli 
^^ffidCf ztttndtd by many Lords, Knights^ 
Sipures and Ladies, every one of the whei' 
Ladies li£iadii^ a Lord or a Knight by his 
HOTfes Bridle till they came to WeHSmithfeU^ 
^hereasfbon as the Ladj of the ^X^A^arrivM,' 
lie Tournaments be^n, which held for fe^ 
ven days t(^ethen There was at the upper 
end or the Lift a foft of Semi-circular Thea- 
tre or Throne,adornM with fine Tapeftry,and 
, iiarious Seats in the midft of which, ort a fort 
of Throne above the r^, fete the Ladj of the 
^A^adorn'd with JBeams more piercing and 
Wnine thanthofe of the fiery Planet it felf, 
,*)8 each fide late two rows of Ladies fpark* 
h^ as the Galudry or fixt Stars, behind each 
^ir ftood her Knight. But all the Eyes of 
tlic Affe^bly were dent with defire and ad* 
oiirationi Happy above Meafure (figh'd each 
to himfelf) the Man that can gain the Good 
'^aces of fo Angelic a Creature. But as her 
fieauty was able to inflame all Mankind, fo 
washer Bounty of that Beauty able tofatis- 
fy all luif Adorers ; tho* that part of her Cha- 
Klftef was not known at this Time, perhaps 
«Mce difcover'd by her 0wn dear felf, who 
fin this fetal day had not thought of any othef 
Jcribn but the old and feeble King, and on 
him only for her Profit^ for the Gold, Jewels 
*nd Grants Ihe got of him, not for the amo- 
fOUs Pleafurcs he gave her. But this Tilting 

Q being 

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in her Honour, under the Title of Lady of the 
SVNj as. flie appeared in greater Glory, and 
miore confpicuous than ever before, fo did ma- 
ny a martial Knight exert himfelf botH in 
Feats of Arms and Addreft, much more than 
ever they had done, without hopes of being 
gracious in her Eyes. But Woman, like For-* 
tune, feldom chufes by Merit, but by the 
blind impulfe of her own Fancy, influenced 
by fome odd, fecret, invifible Charm, which 
no-body elfe can difcOver. 

Thus the L^y of the SVN took little No- 
tice of any of the Noble and the Brave, who 
had performed their Parts to admiration of all 
that beheld them, but had foon fixt her Eyes 
on one Michael de U Pool^ a Merchants Son ^ 
. the City^of I^/^^/^,Cafterwards iii Richard 2^ 
time E^ltIoI Suffolky &c.) This Gentleman w^ 
very young, and guiltlefs of the Raz^r was his 
Chiny the Doun fcarce yet appearing there; his 
Hair was flaxen, his Complexion clear and 
ruddy, his Stjature pretty tall, his Air and ' 
Mein bold, yet agreeable ; his native Aflu- 
rance wasfortifyM with his native Ignorance 
("wonderful matter to make a Favourite of) 
and that had i>lacM him on the Theatre among 
the People of Fafhion, and fo luckily as to be 
wholly exposM to the View of the Lady of the 
SVNy who fouijd her felf a? much furpriz;?d 
with his Charms, as all rile Men were wiSft 
liers^ 

Ther«f 



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, There ?^ere others there who would have 
^iven many a lavilh Prefent to have made fuch 
a progrefs in her Heart as Michael had done^' 
but in vain ; among the reft was Sir Edward 
Hunsfield^"^ Man ofconfiderable Fortune,' and, 
tone, tho' Nature had given him not one gene- 
ix)us Quality, had Folly and Extravagance e- 
noiigh tofquander it away in a few Year^,. 
without the Imputatiori ot having done the 
leaft good with any Part pf it. Sir Edward 
knew notning of the finer Sentiments of Love, 
but only the brutal Enjoyments, which hke 
a Briite he had rather > come immediately to,' 
than heighten hisDefires and Pleafure by all. 
ihe Idepent and charming Approaches the 
^Ifiil Managers of Pleafure majkeiife of on 
fijefe QGcafions. Having therefore feen the 
Iddy of the SVNy found an impatient defire 
-bf lying with her, and letting his Confidant 
know his Diftemper^ hereply'd in this Man- 
fler: Staj^ dear FriendySirEdvfzxAjftnteyotir' 
Ambition is fhounted fo high as the Miftrefsof 
k Kjng^you have this corHfort^that herTjemfer is 
fnch^ that yoti niaybiiy her Fd'bours with Gdld^ to 
vSich [he facripes dll things: The Knight Was 
Wljpleas'd that- any \^i^ay ^x^as cut out to a;; 
tteafure that had rais'd hisDefires to a great- 
ly ftretch than ever before he had experience,; 
ind gave his Friend or Pimp fiill Povi^er^ to 
treat with the Lady's Agents ill this Affair,' 
which with fame difficulty Was* concluded for 
toooo Nobles ; and he being admitted to her^ 
Apartment,' found the Lady in Bed, ready to' 
*«ceive ttot and Ws" Money; But tiw Knight^ 

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misfortune was (8^, that when he bad^ti^ 
ter'dthe Lifts of l^enus^ and the willing Fair, 
one ready to furrender all her wond^rfiyil 
Charms to hi? Arms, the Knight proved leisj 
than a Man, and fpeni the whole Ni^t in 
fruitlefs Attempts at a Happinefs his Stai^ 
had deprived hun of the Power pf poffeffing-r 
The t'mie of parting is come^ the l^nigw 
full of Difpair and Rage, ciu^sM his Stars, and 
whatever had difabled him from reaping t|6 
Benefit of his Purcliafe; yet Apologizing in 
as tender a manner as he could to the Lady, 
beggM that fhe would aUow him another tinw 
of TryaL But fhe fmiling, tdd him, that ft» 
fearM it would he to no purpofe, bwt that if 
he pleas'd to bringthe other ioooo,flie would 
give her felf the Mortificjitionof his Embra- 
ces another Night, but on no other Condition^ 
So departing with Sliame,Sir EdrPMrd never af- 
ter folicited fo vain and expenfive a Suit. 

De U Poole in the mekn while fennd his Stars 
more propitious, arriving at greater Happi- 
nefs with l^s Cliarge. For before the days 
of the Tournament was over, he had foun4 
fome favourable Glances from the Lddj of 
the SVNj to which his own Vanity gave luch 
an Interpretation, as to raife, his Endeavours 
to improve the Imagination to a Reality. Fof 
as foon as the Sports of the day were at an cnd> 
he took care at the rifing of the Company to 
prefs among the Crowd, as clofe to her as 
polfible; and Ojpportunity oflFering, in the 
^iurry> feizM her fine Hand,andpreK'd it with 
Ardour;. She firftfuff§r'^ his Affurance* and 
*"•."' theft 



dbyGoogk 



Tie^lifi Female Favomte, 85 

rifen ^icreas'd it by returning his Advances, 
tin he found out the way of being admitted 
^vately to Clofet ; and where the Man that 
knows himfdtf belov'd is alone with the Wo- 
inanhe deiires -^joth by Ambition and Love, 
diereis notimeieft befqre he fecures his Aim, 
hf feizing all Aat the Lady could give. Her 
Rdiftanpe was not great, and Ihe perhaps dif- 
*over*d more fire in the Encounter than tlie 
Iftppy Man Ihe beftow'd thofe Favours upon, 
that fo many figh'd for in vain. 

' Thefe amorous Thefts had bee? fometimes 
Wpeated when the Negotiation with Sir Ed- 
pa^d was finiih'd, and Five thoufand of the 
Kc^les fhe received firoijj her BubbJ.e flje gave 
^ her feVouf^d Gallant, ^vi.th which he pur- 
"<las'd an Annuity (^500 Nobles a year,which 
iepoiTefttill his'Difgrace and Ruin in the 
Acceding Reign. 

peU PooUy tho' he had a mixture of Love 
in fliis Intrigue with this lady, yet Self-In- 
treftwas thf charm that preferv'd his Conftan- 
<y fo Iqijg, that foi^ie of the Enemies of 
t^Ladji rf the SVN,by their Spies, had fonie 
fiotice of the Affair, and did what they could 
to put an end to the Dotage of the King, by 
BK^ing a difcovery of her Infidelity. It was 
With all the Addrefs of Cunning that they 
toidd infinuate (b much Sufpicion into the 
Kin^ as to makp him agree to a tryal of find- 
ing mm in her Apartment alone with her, as 
fee promis'd to fliow him. Information was 
^ro^ht, and the King and his Friend^ pafs*d 
^ t Mafter-Kfty^mto her Lodgings, at th 

G J FCf 

\ 

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very Minute that la Foole was happy in Im 
Arms. The King, I fuppo.fe, opt of a defire 
of not being undeceived, making fome noiije 
at the laft Door, the Lovers had juft turn'4^ 
to difengage themfeivesi and by her dexte- 
rous Addrefs fhe hid him under hc^r Pettyr 
boats, and fet down upon him, and feigning 
theCollick, received the King and his Atten- 
dants without the leaft fuiprize; difcoyering 
?ill the wliile the Agonies of thofe Iharp Pains 
ito which fhe pretended. The ^opm being 
iearcffd, and every place examin'd, the Kin^ 
look'd on her with a4>leafihg Eye, but frown^ 
ing on thofe that had accus'd her, led them 
fpeedily from her Apartment, begging par? 
^on for their unfeafonable Intruiion. 
' The Company being gone, (he immediate* 
lygot up and deUver'd the Prifoner from his 
confinement and. pain, and throwing him oil 
the Bed to recover his fright ^ fhe goes antf far 
flens all the Doors,to prevept any farther fur- 
prize ; when returning to him, fhe could not 
forbear laughing at the happy Event, and the 
\voful Condition her Lover had been in while 
he bore all his burden pn his Shoulder?, almoft 
ftifled with the very Heat of the Emp;yr^ 
of Love. Having rally*d a Iittle,and lightncd 
bis Spirits, they ventur'd into the Bed, and 
there revel'd in the very Luxiiryof Pleafur& 
till the Mornings approach gave him notice 
i© retire, which he did with all the fafcty 
jjn^ginabie. ' : i . w . -^ } 



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The EngUfi Female Favourite. ^7 

TiPd with the Pleafvprps, not the Pains o^ 
the Night, the Lidy kept hef Bed to a very, 
unufual hour, which ferv'd for i confirmation 
of the reality of thatlUnefe flie had only pre- 
tended : for when a Man has a mind to be de- 
ceiv'd by a Woman, the very things that 
ihould difcover thelmpofture confirm him m 
the belief of its being a Reality. Thus Oic 
King, almoft afraid to fee her, after he had bc- 
trayMa Sufpicion,without being able to juftifie 
it byaProof of her Infidelity, approachMhcr 
Bed with avifiblefearof herAnger. Shew^s 
not infenfible of her Power, but was refoly'd 
to'turn it to her own advantage, and therefore 
.receives him with a feeming Difdain, and Qm 
ftiort) makes him pay dear for doubting her 
.'Honour, when he could bring no proof ot her 

tier imagin'd Innocence in this, gave her 
fiich an Afcendantover the Kmg*s Soul,, that 
he could deny her nothing: This Advantage 
flie was rcfolvM to makeufe of wlule the King 
wasaUve,and the Death oftheB/4r^Prwe had 

remov'd alf her powerfol Oppofers. She was 
poffefs'd of this Maxim, That if jhe got but 
Money enough, jbe could he guilty of no Crmes but 
*tms in the power of that to flop the Trojecutfon, 
-She firft engrofs'd all the pi^ofitable Places to 
her feif and her Creatures; every thing that 
Would bring in the Gold, Ihe took care to di- 
We of at tie beft Market Price. If there waa 

ally Suit ihLaw depending betwixt her felf (or 
^ny of her Creaturcs)>nd any otlierjhe would 

l^ffelf appear and fit' m Gou^ts^f M'-^-r^* 

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>^ Arf'X# ^ A^ 



py her Prefence and Influence to wreft Juftlcflf 
IrDmitsbyafs: And tlierc were fuch Judges ia 
Commiffion, a5l would endeavour to gratifie a 
J.ady, from whom they mi^t hppe ib much.^ 
Virtue is not naturally ^r 45 leaft cuftortiia- 
rily j the Grpwth of Courts, or any of the Ave^ 
nues to 'en> ; fo that '|:is no Wonder thatmoft^ 
if not all thofe who f\ad any dependance there j 
pr any Views that Way, were rwdy not only 
to fubmit to her Exorbitances, but even to fla)^ 
tcr 'em with the fpeciousName of PrudetKe^ 
and an innocent Care of her hftereH,. I will not . 
■ib much condemn her for fleecing fuch as ap- 
ply'd only for the Means and Power of fleecing. , 
|bme others, that might h^ve a Dependance oa | 
the Offices they purchas'd, j(ince thofe wouldi.i 
elfe have made ufe of her Power on|y fQr theiF;-. 
pwn advantage, wliile the In^y of thcii; if 
Aftions would reach up to her who had pre-. • 
ferM'emj but by making them pay for what . 
Ihedid for'em, Ihepromtuted iiof bet: Cli^- 
rafter to the Hate of tfte l^eople for nCtth^^^ 
Yet fhfcan ifever be forgiven, in fulferijiig n^ 
mercenary Temfper to yanquifji all Confiaqracv 
tiOnsfor the Frailties of Love^ t<^ which fli^ . 
ibund her Heart always very much indiQ'd': 
For, from the King, fhetry'd ihoft Pe^r^of 
his Leige-pepple,' even ^0 K^pe-d^ncers andt. 
Players, pr any Man whofe rqbuft AppiearanccI . 
promi^'d a vigorous fatisHi^ibn of I^erialaciou^ . 
Jinjoymen^s, Yet flie prbyd an' implacabl^ 
Enemy to a young tady, c^lVd Mat^^f afi^: 
Jhcr Lover Gotojre^ |n the Mi^brtun|s whibh at^ 
landed '^ on the ^ifcpverV9ft%i^|a?ri^c^, .. 



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TkeStcry of MATILDA W Golofrs. 

MAtilda yrzs ^Relation of this Favourite 
Lady of the SuN^ and all her dependanc^ 
3jiras entirdy iipon hei: leather ^lid Mothei^ 
who were very nearly related to her. In hopes 
of Preferment, Msttlda was lent out of th^ 
Cvunfry to 0>«rf , tb be under the Eye ofJlicUy 
the Lddj of the Sun : On the Road Ihe and her 
p>nipany were overtaken by a young Gentler 
inan about the ageof Twenty, and his Servant. 
)t hapnea t|i^ Wab^s were extreamly out iii 
inany parts of the Country, efpecially in that 
jtart which they were yet tqpafs, between the 
place where they joynM cothpany and Lo»do»» 
After fome hours Conver&tion, th^ yoUng La> 
dyand Gentlenvin founcl th^ipfelves ftrucK 
with a mutual Faffibn for one^another, an4 
every moment improving it, they came to a 
Ikie bverflow'd with Water, and in it was a 
Bridge that was to be pafs'd, but was entirely 
covcr'd by the Flood, which to mifs was tp 
hazard in a great meaiure their Lives : Voung 
Qohfrey in pain for his Mift^pfs, rode before 
heir, t(i dircft her Horfe in the way, but in the, 
midf^bfthe Water, juft by the Bridge, her 
Ifearfeby fo^eftran^e Accident ftartled with 
foch vehemence, that he threw the Ijidy from 
his Back, ytho fcreaming but as Ihe was filing 
into the Water, flie foon fank ; the Lover im* 
inediately leapM froA hi^^prfe to fave her, 
jiiid' as (1^ roie a fecbnd time, caught hold m 
m Arm, arid drew her clofe to him. There 

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^o i'be GoiD^U S p Y, 

was, about a Bows Ihot off, a fort of Iflaod in die 
Walter^ that held fts Head a Iktle above the 
Stream, and attended by two or three Trees and 
a finall Huttor Houfe, the only hopes of lif^ to 
the defpairing Galj^nt; thither he lleei^d bis 
Courie, fiipporting his dear Matilda with one 
Hand, in his cumberfom /Vccbutrements, now 
^Imoft fpent with getting tothedefir'd place. 

Scarce was be able to get either himielf or his 
dear Lady up the Bank, which at the place they 
came to was fbmewhat more fteep and flipperjr 
than in any other part ; yet, unable to venture 
farther, he exerted himfelf, and with no litd^ 
difficulty got her afliore, and by degrees into the 
Hovel that was there. It had been a Recepiads 
pf fohie Wretch that as'd in theSuthnier-timew 
live there on the Alms or Expences of Jraw 
Ie»,byftlling a Dram, or feme fubh thing, « 
they paft'd • but in this Seafon it was Wft 
defolate, as unable to aSbrd any Benefit by hcia$ 
in fuch a (blitary place. Thei-e was in it a fort 
of a thing like a Chimney, a broken Stool, and 
two or three Hurdles that might fupply the office 
of a Bed : There wetp likewife fome little pieces 
of Sticks, that might make a Fire, could the^ 
find any means of lighting the Fuel; but Ibdilr 
■ftry overcomes all things^ Gphfre more ctMi* 
cern'd for his Miftrefs than himfelf, gently ptaj 
ted heron the Hurdles, and bending her Head 
down, would have made her bring up the Watci 
fliehad fwalldw'd, and by good Fortune having 
A Bottle of Cordial W^ater in his Pocket, be gave 
^icr fome, which produc'd hew Life and V»g?2 
tofupporther under this Misfortune. Searching 

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liboiw, he found a Flint and Ibme Touchwood, 
flod bf the help of his Knife be (truck fire, whidi 
leiinpiov'd to far, as to light the Sticks whicfi 
Fortune had thrown in his way : By this means * 
ihey^dryMthemfelves, expediag their Servaata 
would bring 'em ibme RelieE But they by good 
Lock haWng e&ap'd the Danger, aiid Golofrfs 
Man having got fair Ma/ler'sHorfe, ne'r defignM 
toproceed in fo'ckngerous a) Road) but by the 
^opportunity gptiip into the higher Ground, 
and made his way over Hedge and Ditch to the 
iirft Houfe he cpald fee. The Lady's Horfe was 
^ve down with the Scream, «nd her Servant 
|vhhmuch adb getting back again, never flaid 
i^examin wjietber his Miftrei^ere £ife or no^ 
lit returned home to Jiis Mafter with the News^ 
pt Ihe was drown^. 

\-($9icfrfs Man had found his paflige fo difficult, 
Alt wh«n he<»me in fight of aHoufe it began to 
wduskifli, aodalmoft dark by that time h«had 
reach'd it : It fortunanly prov'd to be a Mill thaH 
ibodon that Rivulet, whichthe Rains had now 
jBade^ dangerous a Torrent. The Miller had 
aJittle flat Boat, which he us'd to paddle witb 
^tbe head of his Milt«pond, and wasfoonper-^ 
MKaded by the Man to venture down the Stream 
wiA that Boat, to fetch up his Mafter and the 
Udy, but no Price could win him to fo dange- 
ions an Attempt in a Night that afforded not one 
glimering Star todire^ fo uncertain a CouHe, 
but as foon as the Day b^an to peep they (et out 
9a their Voyage, and in three hours timearriv'il 
ll the place, where they found the poor Lover»^ 
»4erpair of all Relief: for having throughly 

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dried dwrnfelve^ by the Fire, and again ril^Mtf 
diemf^ves with a Dram, they hod leifture WGoi^ 
fidcr their difmal Cirpumftance ; yet coald oat 
all the Danger they had paft, or that which th^ 
wiere now in, refirain his declaring his Pa^ion« 
and preiUng her fb far as to confefi, that by G^ 
fiitude and Inclination (he was inclin'd to reww 
8 I/>ve (b agreeable to her Wilhes. 

Vows of eternal Love and Frtendfliip heme 
pafi'd, he began to coi|fider how he (hould m 
JMeans for her to get Ibme Repofe ; he renewed 
the Hre, puU'd ott his Coar, and wrapping h^ 
in it, laid her on the Hurdles, her Head lyiog^ 
his Lap, to his no fmall pleafure and fati^faQiiidd; 
Tba* ^4r«//f's Fatigue had compei'd her to y 
to (bme Ihort Slumbers, yet Gdtjn bad a 
cure of too much Plealinre and too much 
to have the relief dT a i^lnk of Sleep all 
Night, but pft^n in the Tranfports of his PaifiM( 
|iug*d ^a^ilJa fo eagerly, that he wa^'d her fr^ 
btrRe^fe. 

T\k Miner and his Man beii^ come, they afl< 
Wfnt on bcNird this noble Veil^ ; and the Miller 
beiiig as skilful as Typhis^ they arriv'd fafely at 
his Mill* and there with what the Miller's Stodic 
could aflford they refreih*d themfelves, and M^ 
$iUa went to reft in the Millf r's Bed, and G9iifr« 
in his Man's; and tho'neiither of *dn were Beds' 
<^Ooune, yer they ilept heartily, beiiig warcf 
andiecuie. 

But the Convenience the Miller had wa^ 

iiot fufficient for the Condition of the Guefts; 

and no Towii was nearjor than four or fivef, 

^e, and thq Lady found her felf m a v^ 

pac| 

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IpdCsnditiof^ very feaveriih and weak, buc 
m^ Mt by the help of the Millers Wife to 
4^is her fdf, and get on Horfeback, and by a 
gently pace to reach the firft Inn of a tdera- 
Qle Accommodation, where ihe immediately 
took her Bed, aad he fent for a Phyflcian, the 
beft in the Country, but ihe grew worTeimd 
worfe, becoming lightheaded ; fo that Golofre 
who never was from her, thought ^ at; lafi 
n^ 0nd his Man away to her lathers Houfe 
ipifl^rm him of her Condition ; this w^s two 






s Journey at thatJSeafon, and before her 
mei 



er could come^ her Fcaver had left her, 
^ ihe was ina&ir way of Recovery. 
Uatilda took care to give a large and pa- 
^-jue Account of Golop-e, and the Services 
1 done her, and that owing her Life to 
ihe could do no lefs than comply 
his Importunities by a promife of Mar- 
Je, if (he could get her Friends Gonfcnt. 
ic Mother had view*d him with Eyes that 
Mrfuaded her to think kinder of hint than of 
aJSon-in-Iaw ; and confidering that their flay 
was not to be long together, ihe madefeveral 
sfvances to the youne ^an, which he would 
Mtter have met, had his Heart been free from . 
tpp .Charms of the Daughter ; for the Mother 

fs npt abo^e Thirty four, and very Youth- 
both in Appearance and Thoughts,lhe had 
wty enough to render her defirable^ and 
^jrpyocation enough from a fumbling old Hus- 
Wid to wilh that others might thmk fb, efpe- 
'*""7 young Golofre f whom, every moment 
lov'dmore and more. She had Addreis 

enough 

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£nongli to put off his Demands'afld her Datigfi- 
ters to tke decifion of her Htsbaiid, to whoiii 
it was neceifary that fhe fhpuld return, tfll her 
lieatth was confirmed, arid the Fathers deter- 
mmation in that particular^ received. , 

Being therefore now abfe tb fit a Horfe, ad 
eafie one was got, and the higher Roads cho-! 
fen to return to her Fathefs,whither young Gfo- 
lofre was invited on what hie thought the Hap^'^ 
pinefsofhis Life, but indeed Only for theufe 
Of the Mother, who had attempted by broad 
(ides often to let him know heir Min^^ of 
which he having inform'd the Daughter, (he 
took care to allow as few momeiits of Perfe- 
cution to her Love as poffible ; but itwasim* 
poflible always to prevent fome Opportunitidi,' 
when a Mother that govern'd the Fami^ 
made it her Bufinefs. Bertha ( that was t6e 
Mothers Name; had manag'd the old Mad' 
fOj as to give Denials to the Pretender,* 
truing him, that fhould he yield to his Sluit, ic 
was only to deprive himfelfof thofe Honours 
which he had coveted, by feeing her marry'^ 
to a Man of the 6rft Quality, by the Inter€|| 
of Madam AlictA their near KinfWoman; That 
he had now, thro' her Intereft, a fair profpeft 
of arriving to the Dignity of a Lord and Peer' 
of thit Realm. Thefe were Arguments' 
ftron^ enough to fecure her Husband from 
granting a Boon, that/nuft deprive her of the 
Happinefs that fhe efleem'dthe greatefl in tSii^ 
World. 

Golofre began to be weary of dfotibtful R^| 
plies, and therefore prefs'd the dd Gendeman' 

tor 

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to be plain with him, and.let him know what 
he had to depend on in a point of that con- 
cern to his Repofe ; and found at laft, that the 
Father, uiiable to put him off longer, let him 
know that his Ddire was not in his Power j 
rfiat his CouGn AUctA had taken her for her 
own, and demanded the entire difpofal of her 
Perfon, that in Gratitude for the Life he had 
favM, he would write to her in his behalf.This 
being all the Anfwer he could get, GoAj/* 
having inform'd MttiUa, of the matter,refolv'<l 
to go immediately for L(j»<fi?/»,and try by lome 
means or pthet to get into the good Graces, 
of her who had the difpofal of his Happinefe 
in the Perfon of Matilda, Xhe Evening Iw- 
fore he was to depart, Bertha at her wits ends, 
^s refolv'd to put all to the hazard of a tryal 
of Skill'. .When,therefore,Go/<?^^ was in Bed, 
and afleep, as fee had taken care her Huf. 
iSnd fliouid be, by a private Door ihe let h^* : 
fe|f in her Shift into the Charpber where her 
Beloved; lay, and gently got into the Bed 
without waking him, fhe having taken care 
that the old Gentleman and he fhould.have . 
bpth their Load, Bacchus over-powerii^ Femf 
and all her Night Torments, Lan^ilhmc^nts 
and Watchings, Gotofre flept moft-profoundly, ^ 
How Bertha, managed the- njatter I can't tell, 
but being a Woman of Addrefs, fhe did not . 
entirely lofe her Satisfaffeion ; .which eagerly, 
purfuing, the Gallant awak,'d, and furpriz^d 
betwixt fleeping and waking at a Woman ia 
^edwith him, and in fo familiar a poflure, 
lib was renipving away from her, but fhe claf- 

fing 

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,?U* iiO^-VJ O i E» E If O! F T. , 

tking him about the Wa(te,cUng'd ^ clofe.!|. 
be eafily ihook off JVhether^ dear (jolofre,io/ 
thou fiet from the Unguijbif^ Matilda f faid ffie J ? 
My Parents detfjf me thy Lawful Embrtees^yHt mt 
being ible to live without them, in my Nighi tf 
jyij^dir I have thrown aftde my Virgin Mddefiy to 
poffefs them without the Ceremof^ of Law, mtai 
has paft betwixt us in thyfieefwas hut ahaJf Sa- 
tisfadtioni while I was defriv^d $f tlrofe Tranfforts 
thy Love for Mitilda^ft/ give thee tofnd her 
in thy Jrms,fuferi>ig thee to rifle aH her Charmsi 
Why thus cold, thus indifferent? Sfore my Mo- 
- dejlyy while darknefs hides i>tf Blujbes, and thyfelf 
41 Man in Reality^ as welt as in Jpfearanee, 
■ Go/o/^ had too noble an Ideadf Matilda to 
think, that flic could either aft or fj^feSK iff 
this matter, and bcliev'd, that it i^asno (V 
ther than her Mother, and thusreply'd, ffn- 
ving to get loofe from her hold, while Ihei 
twin'd her felf about him like a Snake, not tj 
be fliook off. Madam (faid he) difmifs mejuth 
Impudence unmans-, me while you kept your Ktrtue 
you had Charms^nowyou aSHike the moft aban* 
don'd Proftitute^ you have none : Difmifs t^t of I 
(baUraifetheOmfeandexfofeyoutoyourParemH 

who as Ifnd they do not love you^ fo have thef 

%afeMan, reply'd Betthi/ooweHthouknoal'J^ 
in whofe Arms thou art-, Matilda would have 
found thee more warm ; yetknowy thou canflnever 
enmher without Incefl, and I will take tare^V 
pebble, that you never fee each other more,^"^*^ ^ 
you ought to conftderthe Injury you hofvedantme* 
for my Virtue munded m »^4P/#« w»t n^ 

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/Matilda ««fl?« Go LcxFRte. 97 

hnierittj Life ever miferable. If thou hajlfav'd, 
my Daughters Life^ wilt thou murder me for her 
ftke? No, 1 know no Reafon hut that/he Jbould 
die for her that gave her Life^ not I for doi/fg 
it. Do not firuggle thus, I cannot hold thee long : 
Am Inotfair ? Vm daily told of a thoufmd Charms 
that yet Jmile in my Face, have I not one to touch 
thy obdurate Heart? Not enow to move thy Com^ 

fifton, if not Love ? — AS fhe would have 

gone on, he broke from her, ah4 fhe in her 
Agony could not h^Ip reproaching him fo 
loud, and in terms io vehement, that he was . 
afraid the Houfe would be difturb'd. She 
apprehended his fear, and following him out of 
Bw — No, no, faid fhe, if I ca,nnot live in Haf^ 
p»efs, thou Jhalt not Uve beyond me, here J will fix 
Vfjfelf tiUmy Husband come and trans fx us both, 
thit will hefome Pleafure, to dye with you, and hin- 
dtr any other from enjoying the PUafure that is 
hifd to me. She urgM him with that vehe- 
mence, that he perfwaded her to go into the 
Bed, and that h^ would come to fier, and do 
what he could toacquit himfelf of what ilie 
expefted from him. - 

Perfwaded by thefe fair Words, nor yet wil- 
ling to be caught in that condition by the 
family, fhe return'd to the Bed, fuppofing 
wme neceflfary Occafion might oblige him to 
% a little ; but he making to th? Door, with 
much ado got it open, and flying to his Man's 
Chamber, fhe purfu'd him ; he had fcarce got '■■ 
me^refhe wasi come to him; but being thus 
excluded, fhe vow'd Revenge, and fo left 
ni©. 

H But 

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But all this had made fo much noife, thit 
not only Mantdayhut fome of the Servants were 
rouz'd ; and coming out with Candles, found 
Golofi-is Door open, tho' all his Cloaths there, 
and prefently Bertha foil of Rage and Tears, in 
her Smock : She could not bear the fight of A&- 
iilda^ but giving her fdme blows andfcratches 
on her Face, fhe drove her to her Chamber, 
^nd had it not been for the Servants, had cer- 
tainly deftroy M her. This rouz'd the 01d-ma% 
who miffing his Wife, and hearing his Daugh- 
ters Voice, gets up, runs to her Chamber, an4 
examines the matter, interpofing his Authori- 
ty: il^D^^r, (fiid Btrrha) Ij/wgaw^key Ihe^i 
Matilda^r Chamber-door open^ and Jhe trip Wm 
as I magirP'dy^to GolofreV Chamber ; fearing w 
vporfty I immediately went after thus in my Shifty to 
prevent what I feared : J heard her pfen his Door 
knd fleal in • IfoHcHv^d and purfu*d htr even to his 
iBedy where Jeizing her y her Gallant rofe in hrde* 
fence y threatningme in a vile and fcandalousTnan- 
her ; hut^ unable to m&v^ me^ Igot her out^ and my 
iajjtonprevailingy heather arid fcr4tch'^d her fn^y 
hut am forry I proceeded fo far ^ fince t ^ad happily 
prevented the J^fchief. 

This raisM the Old-man's Indignatwn,and 
taking his great Sword, would have gbpe im- 
mediately to his Chamber, and mad^ him pay 
his life for his Attempts on thf Homp^r 'orhis 
Family; but beiug a little pacified qy his l^a- 
dy, and defirM to defer it tillthelq[idrrii|3g, he 
>vas Jed back to his Chamber andi^d by nis 
fdfe Spoufe. The Servants andMatiida^w 
that all Ber/ka had utter'd Was entirely »I^^; 



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t 



MArtit&A and liotoFiiE. 99 

jid MMda, who fen^sw her Mother's Paffion 
ytGotojrey was fatisfied that fhe had made 
feme fruitlefs Attempt on his Virttie, nothing 
elfe could have put her into fo violent a Rage. 
Gdo^e^sr Man, in the mean while got up^ 
flr^ himfelf, and coming down, found the Ser- 
vants with Lights, by the help of which he 
gathered his Matter's Cloaths together, an4 
carried \m up to his CHamber, where he dreft 
him, and told him what he heard from the Ser- 
yzvAS belo\V'. Golojre -viras mightily touch'd 
Mtli the Misfortunes of his dear MstiUa^ and 
chof? rather to expofe hinifelf and Bertha to 
the Referitmeht of the old Gentleman, than to 
Icive Matilda expos'd to the Malice and Re- 
^^0 of fo barbarous a Mother" : He therefore 
rcfoYvM riot to-ftir till he had feen the old Gcn- 
ddftttru and fet things in as good apofture as 
he poflib ly could. The old Man was up before 
tes ufual Hour, full of Refentment for the fup- 
^s'd Injury Golofre-hvh done him ; his Wife 
^ih'd him on, hoping that one or both would 
611 intkeQifarrel, and that if either furviy'd, 
It might be in her power fooh to fend him af- 
ter the other ; to fuch dangerous Extreams do 
ottr Paflionsdriveus,when we give our felves 
uptotheircondud, without regard to Virtue 

brHoneftv. 

. MafiU'a had fock'd her felf up in her Cham- 
felfcr with only her Maid,' foil of Tearsand DC". 
fpair both for her felf and her Lover.' And 
myvv'the old Gentleman and Bertha czmt into 
fheHall, where they found Golojre ziid his Man 
tea^y to takcHorfe as foon as they had feen 

H * him,. - 

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I 

him. Bertha J to/amufe her ftusband, ifflmcy 
diately fdlls on the youn^ Man, caHing hin» 
bafe and treacherous Villain, a Spoiler of their 
Honour and Peace, and thundered out fuch a 
Volley of abufive Curfes, that the old Man 
was fain to command her to be filent, and 
leave the righting his Honour to himfelf. 

Madam^ laid Golofre^ I amforry your MUnefs 
And fotty have put me under, anec^ffity of declaring 
to your Husband^ that your Rage at me is becaufe I 
rvould not be the Spoiler of the flonour of your JR^- 
i»/7y, and not becaufe I md in vain attempted it:, 
but the Prefervation of your Daughter^ J Life ^ and 
the clearing mine own Honour yoblige me to a Courfe 
I tremble to take. 

THefe word^ alarmM both the Husband and 
Wife, but fhe, who had only Impudence ta 
bring her off,be^an to fcold again, hwt her Huf- 
band told her, tnat a method fo prepofterous 
^ ould more confirm Iiim in his Doubts than 
all the Evidence Golofre could bring. Silence 
being therefore made, Golofre in as modeft 
terms as poflible let the old Gentleman know 
how £he had perfecuted him !witli her Love, 
and that if he had that Night but yieWedto 
have broke the Bands of Ho^itality, there had 
been no Difturbance, but he had departed in 
Peace, and done a Villany, which his refilling 
to be guilty of has involved him in. He then 
6blig'd the Servants to give an account of all; 
they knew, and by cbmpving all together,the 
Husband was fatisfied of his Wife's defign of 
making him a Cuckold, butnotof theMatter..^; 
of Faa,.fince he eafily belie vM than Golofre^^ 
" Heart-. 



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The Ei%lifi female Favwrite. i o i 

ffeart being prepoffefeM with the Love of the 
Daughter, he might eafily reflft what could be 
therdbre no Tejnptation to him. Comoiand- 
flig his Wife to her Chamber immediately, he 
took his leave of G(?/^ip, and at hisdetire fcnt 
his Daughter to ^ Relation ten miles off, till 
her Face was recoverM,and flie got to Lpndon^ 
there to undergo as heavy a Perfecation for 
Love under the Lady of the Sun* 

What became of Bertha and her Husbaiid I 
jbownot, having only heard what I told you 
J^Iated- by Matilda and Golojrej to Alicia^ in 
hopes by that means to fotten her Heart to 
pity a Love that arofe in Misfortunes, and yet 
never met with any Smile of Succefs. 

When Matilda was come to Londan^ fhe was 
pacioufly received by her Coufin the Lady of 
wSuN; and the more, becaufe fhe found in 
her Charms that might be able to engage the 
Heart of fome Man of Power to ftrengthen 
her Ihterefl: when the old King fhould die, and 
Mrheii fhe piuft expeft the Aflaults of her Ene- 
mies, for all the Irregularities which fhe had 
committed all the time of her Power. 

She try'd the King's Sons, but there fhe was 
too much hated to hope for Succefs, or any to* 
lerable Terms : flie at laft confiderM of her old 
Gallant de la Poole^ by a fort of Prophetic Spirit 
ferefeeing his Power andlnterefl in the next 
Reign, tho' then there was nottheleaft appea- 
rance df any fuch mighty Fortune attending 
him. De la Poole faw her with admiration, . 
and had he fupposM that Aliciah Power would 
have |>eeQ of any long continuance, he had 

H J / fooa 

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Xpa The Go|.DEJC Si? IE. 

icon ffoirg'd the Bait ; but asMatt€rs ftood^ht 
kept mr in fuch .a fulpence, that fhe hadflC| 

, reafon but to think that He thought theMatdi 
very honourable as well as adyahtagepus tQ 
him. . - 

Golojre had made fuch m Intereft ^ith a 
Privado of the Lady of the Sun, that he was ad- 
mitted with Matilda, to make a fujlrelation oiF 
all that had pafsM between them, which they 
told in fo moving and pathetic a manner, a^ 
inuft have mov'd any one who could be {cnfi- 
ble of any thing but her own Intereft ; (be. was 
too much a Courtier to, difmiis 'eip without 
Hopes, tho' fhe rcfoly'd to difappoint'theii 
pefires. 
' Golojre was no fooner gone, but Matilda waJj 

/order'd to be ftriSly guarded, and all Admit* 
tance (even Letters to or ivom Golojre j entirely 
forbidden : And de la Poole growing colder as 

, the King grew weaker, ftie applied taanothejj 
young Spark, who was very great with all the 
King*sSons, had a Place about the Priiice of 
Wdesyznd was therefore hkely to fecure he? 
th^ better when he cam^ to be tying. He few 
her, liked her, and immediately agrees with 
the Laij of the SuiJ, who acquaints MatiUa^- 
That fhe muit prepare to marry tliis Gentle^ 
man. in two days time, becaufe me woijldi lioi 
leave" fo ufeful a Match to the hazard of i?or^ 
tyne. ' A ' • ; ; 

Matilda yfzs ftruck dumb at theNews,aad 
diftrafted withDefpai^,refolv'd not to outline 
the vioUi ion of her Faith, With fome Indu^ 
itryand 'mwe Cold ihi br^by: we^of heC' 
' . -.' ' ,"■•'" •" • • r' ■■■■ (3uar4s> 

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Matilda (jwfl? Golofre* 103 

Guards, (ior Courtiers can't refift Gold on any 
Confiderationj who conyeyM a Letter from 
her to Golojre^hy which jOhe infprmM him of all 
that was defignM againfl: hisHappinefs and 
hers ; protnifingaf he could contrive any way, 
tliat £be would flee with hini from the. hated 
Court, to the fartheft part of the habitable 
World. It was the good Fortune of thefe Lo- 
vers, that the Meffcnger who brpught Golo^e 
the Letter; was the Spn of a Neighbour of his> 
who had formerly be^jn fupported by his Fa*, 
mily Time out of Mind ; and enquiring his 
ISfaroe, took care to let him know his Obliga- 
tion, anjd with Prayers and more Gold agreed 
to help her to ^fcape to him tjfie next Night. , 
Galofe got a Priel^ and every thing in order 
to fix Ma.tters fo faft, that it fhould not be in 
iht p6wer of Fate to jfeparat^ 'em any more^ 
AH tilings being therefore done with Diligence 
and C^re, Matilda Was conveyM to an Apart* 
nient provided, and immediately married to ^ 
him ; and the Hour of the Night, and further 
fecurity of their Love requiring it, they imme- 
diatdy went to Bed • where I leave *em to 
thofe Joys true Lovers find in each others Em* 
oraces, and return to the Lady of the Sun, who 
Was foon infbrmM of her Efcape, aiKl of the 
•Servant that convey'd her away. Her Rage 
being highten'd by the difappointment of that 
R^ftigeftie promisM herfelf, fhe imploys all 
her Creatures to make ftri£t enquir}^ after 'em, 
^ho at laft lighting on the Houfe^ fearch'd ir, 
and fdund 'em iri^^ed together. Go{ofie toldl 
!«niilie was his Wife, aod that no Man had 

H 4 P9W<Mf 

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A wi*. jL ^^U' V4 JL^; jw i^ r# XM I-' jr X'« 

power to> feparate ^em, which now could only 
be done by that God who joynM^em* 

Build not on that^ faid one of the Leaders of 
thofe who fearchM for 'em, for the Court cap^ 
do as much as he that made you ^ in this or 'any thing 
€lfe^ rvhen it fleafei : However j pnce I have not 
yet Power to do any thing in this j wejhall onlyfecure 
you here till we inform our Lady what difcov^ry we 
have made. " 

Alicia was more enraged that flie was difap- 
pointed, than if fhe hadallowM hini a Favour 
tbrFriendfhip; but refolving not to lofe the 
means of her future Security, flie determinM 
to deftroy him by the force of Law if poffible; 
if not, by more dandeftine means. She eafily 
obtains a Warrant to fecure him for ftealing a 
valuable Jewel at the fame time he carried off 
her Coufin ; fhe hacj thofe th^t on his Tryal 
would fwear it, and doubted not of the Kind-^ 
nefs of the Judge to wreft an Evidence to her 
jfide as far as he could. Matilda v/as forc'd front 
her dear Husband by the violence of the Mef- 
fcngers, and born to Alicia at the fame time 
that Golofre was carried to Frifon. The poor 
Lady Matilda fufFer'd, tho^not in fo naufeousa 
Priion, yet in a fine Room, all the Perfecutibii 
fhe was capable of from the Lady of the Sun, 
whofe Rage was proportionM to the Difap- 
pointment ihe had given j;>er: She upbraided 
her with Folly and Ingratitude, prbtefted that 
lier favoured lover or Husband fhould be; 
Ijang'd, and that fhe would turn her out to 
Milery, if ihe<lid hot comply, and marry the 
P^rfon £he had chofe for her, - ' 

^ ^^^^^ : ''-' * Thus 



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lyiATILDA mi UOILOFRE. JO 5 

Thus was Ihe for fome time perfecuted, and 
Golofre by theunwholfom Damps of the Prifpn 
became ackly, when the very Perfon JUcU 
planted for his ruin, deliverM him. The Lady 
rf the Sun had chargM Matilda to receive her 
Friend kindly, and to make no difcpver}'^ of 
her being already married, or fhe would take 
care, by the next Vifit, to remove her pretend- 
ed Husband out of the World ; and fo intro- 
ducing Ker Friend, left the young Couple to- 
gether. He prefsM his Love, fhe difcover'd 
libthing but Defpair, till ^fFefted with her 
Grief, he began ferioufly to enquire into the 
Caufe ; a|id having work'd her into a belief of 
Eis Sincerity by his Proteftations both of Secref 
cjarid Service, flie told him the whole Story . 
pf her Amour and Marriage, and the cruel 
Event of it. Norv^ Sir^ ffaid fhe; ifj/our Pre^ 
tmces^ofljove are real^ you wiE not fee me mifera^. 
We, bfit bringmefome Relief '^ yft no Relief can be 
o^anf force with me ^hut the Safety of my Dear Go-* ' 
lofte ; affifi in that^ and you^ it oblige me in fofen^ 
fthle a manner y that any thing in both our fower$ will , 
he^er your Due. The young Courter, tho* 
touchM with the Story, was yet fp mych a 
Gourtier as to do nothing without a Bribe, 
where it could be had, and therefore preffes 
tbofe Favours fhe could grant, without depen- 
ding on any one elfe ^ She refifls fb yigoroully, 
that even Force was offered, till fhe defir'd a 
Parley ; the Articles were,' That when he had 
fet 'em both at liberty, ahd done fomething 
>frorthy fuch a Favour, he might demand With- 
pUt fear of a Repulfe. Tko^ M4tilda never de- 

f ' . 

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io6 TheGoi^nnti Spy. 

fign'd to comjily with his lewd Defiresi yet flw 
had found, that Sincerity was of noufe in a 
Court, where talfePromifes are current Coin. 

All the young Man could do, was tQ find out 
0otoffes Prifon, and remove him to better Lodg- 
ings, which he had no way to do, but only by 
chreatning the Goaler with fevere Puniihment* 
if Golofre mifcarried under his cuftody ; telling 
fiinr, Th^t Madam y4/ic/<i's Reign was very near 
an end, when notonfy Ihe, but all her Crieature^, 
would be brought to aafwer their illegal Pra> 
dices. 

GeUfrt being removed into a more wholfpme 
Apartment, began to mend apace; and the La^jt 
of the Sun hearing \yy her Spies 6f the Goafer's. 
fadden Kindneis to the unfortunate Prironer,fent 
tiim a feme Reprimand, letting hJLm know, tjniu; 
iince he hid removed him from a place that 
liirould have di(patch*d him to their hands, ftie 
expeded he Woijfd now take care hinifelf to^ml, 
Kim to another World. In thefo Streights, on; 
both fides, the Goaler knew not what to do; but 
cpnfuiting with hb Wife, (a notable Ba^ige,, 
and dne who had taken ibriie liking to GoUfr& 
file adyiis'd' him to fend to Alicia^ that be fboutd' 
be dilpatch^d the next Night, and at the fame 
time to convey him away to fome plape out of 
Town till the King was dead, which was hourly 
cxpeded. 

Tho* this News was agreeable to Alfcia^ it 
fiuck ^tffi/ydi to the Heart, who was juft exfaj 
ring with the News: When her new Lover can^ 
and found her in that concTition^he was extreaffl' 
ly fiirpnz'd at an Account of theCaufc, and go- 

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iogcotheGoaleriail^r'dliim of aibverePuoiih* 
isent «s fpbn as (he King was deparjced, whq 
could not hold out a day longer. The Goaler at 
iafi; taking him afide, lindef the adurance of Se- 
cvecyj tdd him what he had done, and where h^ 
might; find hitii. He comes bade (o Matilih with 
this good News, which immediately reviv'd her,, 
and made her defire that be would tal^ehor out 
withttitnyand convey her ip her i^usband, fince 
by his Authority fhe might go out, tho' not 
without It ; and. tba( it*was now aj^rop^f time, 
Micid beiiqg confin'd to the King's Chamber, he; 
jwiflg now on his Death-bed. 

The Gallant, who could deny her nothittgi 

pofflply'd with her Defiresj^nd convjcyMber tflf 

Ikt Dear Gohfrct delivering her into his Arms,. 

with aq aiftirance of all the Service in his power 

«any tim?. TheGallant being gone, MaiHtli( 

and her Husband refolv'd that moment to retire 

fiir froi» the Ooiirr,. and' to live on that pretty 

Fortune he had, where neither Luft nor Ambi-. 

tiqn fljould ever interfere.with their Love. . ' ■ t 

In the mean time it was now the turrt of tlie. 

hady of the Sun to grieve for the King, there 

^ere manifeft Toj|fens of Death, yet did (he ftill 

Sttter ^m with Hopes of Life, (o that he neg)e^« 

cd making that Provifion for his Soul which & 

*ying Ghriftian {hould,till he was taken quite 

fpeechle&r Mean while the LadyofthcS\x^i<xk- 

caie to malrc ufe of her Time, purloining away 

the moft valuable things in (he Palace, ifealiog 

the very Kings 00* his Fingers as he lay expirii^, 

3od then, like a true Harlot and Favourite, left 

r,™ g^fping for Life, not capable of Ipeaking i 

w "*': ■ '■••'■■ ■'■' .''■ •' ■ .Warii* 

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|o5 X&<? GoLBEN Sp r. 1 

Word, and with only one poor fimple Fryar in 
^eRpom. 

The old King being dead, and the you^ 
one proclaim'd^as there were many about timil 
^ho wifli'd for their fliarecrf the Plunder of the 
f^ady (f the SjiiJ, either by Bribes or Grants, fo' 
thpy Ut her not lon^ continue unmoldfted^ 
bringing a Procefs^againft her: Yet fheonherl 
iidenad fo well imployM hertime, that with* 
her Money flie had corrupted many of the ' 
Lordsy and all the Lamyfrs oi EngUndy who did * 
not only fecretly fplliciteher Affair, but pub- 1 
lickly pleaded her Caufe, and usM all their In- 
tereft in her behatf : Ypt fhe was fo much and 
generally h^tcd for her rapacious Avarice, that 
file was fo vigoroufly profecuted.by theParlia- 
ment,bciag by her own Mouth con vifled, that 
Oie was banimM the Land, and all her Eftate, 
movable or immovable, forfeited to the Ex- 
chequer y frpm whence (hj the late King's Fa- 
vour, or rather Dotage; it had been unduly 
taken. 

On her departure Jfhe gave the Ring, in 
which I then waSj|,tp Michael deUPmey in 
hopes that if he arrivM ^ttfiegood Fortune 
dliat had been foretold hirn, he might do her 
ibme Service as to recalling her into her own 
Country, from a Banifliment fhe abhorrM j 
but he, like a |rue Courtier, before he was fo, 
loon forgot her ; nay, made it his bufinefs tq 
joyn with all that rail'd againft her. 

I hope, by what I have told ycfu ({aid my 

Quine^) of the Ladj of the Sun, IVe been equal 

\ * ' Vith 

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with the Seigmor and Monfieur ; bot what is to 
come fhcws my Power more thanany Inftance 
they have produc'd ; it was in the next Reign 
after my Lady -(^//ciVlfdcHnimoh that this Ex- 
periment was made. 

The Cirandfon, yet a Child, fiicdecded Ed^ 
•mrd III, and tho' he rdgn'd 22 Years, f et 
without the Glory of his Grandfather, he had 
all the Dotage of his Age ; for never Prince had 
more Favourites, and thofe moref unworthy of 
his Favour, and whofe curfed Advice at laft 
brought him to an ignominious End in a pri- 
vate Itate. EVe yet he was of age, this Michael 
de U Poole^mndc Earl of Suffolk, Robert de Veri 
Didre of InUnd^ with aa Archbiftiop of terk 
had led kim fo aftraj^, that the Parliament did 
threaten to depofe mm if he would not furren- 
der thofe Mifguiders of hife Youth, and come 
to them; which being oblig'd to do, his Fa- 
vourites fled : J)e I a Poole ^ before he was fet at 
liberty by the King, to make afecond Efcape 
after he was taken at Qdite, gave me to tlie 
King, as a Token to remember him, afTuring 
him I oncebelongM to thefineftLady in tie 
World ; and that as he belie v'd he Ihould ne- 
ver fee His Majefty. more, fo, as hi^ laft Advice, 
he recommended th^E. of Nom»gham to him . 
for a Man of Judgment, and one who could put 
him in a good way of managing the Parliament^ 
who liad hitlierto been fuch a. Curb to his In- 
clinations. 

The King took his Advice, and being now 
One-and-twenty Years of age, aiTum'd tl^eGo- 
''cramejit himfelf, and by the Advice oi Scroop 

Earl 



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Earl of Wt/#/r^ and the Earl of N^mghm^ 
made maoy alteratiojis. And thetitaedf Ear- 
Uament coming oii, he advis'd with* his ne^ 
'B^vonnvtMottinghitm how to order that nointJ 
My Leigey ( laid my Lord Nbfta^iram): pme of 
har Tiimef bavh tABen ikBfmifoi^Mc^fMrhfdr the 
I^hJs thty ^veaiki^dat ; they hwe tskek it witB 
\ Diidah^ timi they ctmkfHhtJifwhat t^iy pka^l 
tUthnt hhg aemmtdbk tik any drntig Meti; ami 
baveontimji IhtknP g^nin'fo unp^fmlai^^ that if 
they have npt hfl their (y^i^0t; iiey have ciMfide- 
raUy Jhaln^em^ andhtkl a Rei^ perp€t(kOy Ji*. 
fiHrPdrpitkTtmultsamlfVar; ahcreofiftbeyl^ 
imt cokfider'J matttrs juftbfi^ they mig^t bitveked 
mpt^h niore abfolute^ ami i^uohmor& fecare in^U'it^ 
Arhitrary Proceedings^ iftb^had hut' (tuJied t^ 
Art of hrikng the Mmhers of Pai4imnmt. Tour 
Mo^efiy has' a gnat- mmBer of Places i^yo$ir 6ift$ 
tfihich oagkft&kdifirihnttdamotigtheleadmg^ 
ailive Mtfa^s of your HoufeofConMons\ toothM 
you mafi give PinfionSf which will never lie a Far^^ 
thing oat of your Pockt, for they will not fc^UpUt^ 
j^ive Taxesyfo long as iy your Gifts they have ai 
Emttaft aid Intereft- for their Mimey t Nor wA' 
they k over^^mce in examimng into AscQunts^ whei 
their own Receipts muft le found antongfi ^em. Bf 
thefe two Articles you engage another numereut 
Party of Gentkmeuy who are in bapes of the fixmt 
Advantage, and thkfe wiB go ^greater length thai 
ihofe already inPayyfincefheywiiperfwadetht^' 
f elves y that the more thej, do to merit a Rewardf 
tbegreatjtr the Penfionor Place wiBhe. Whenihii 
dhtb^ isfixdy you need advance hut one or two in 
a Sejien^ and you carry.aB'iefore you*^ all your 

A^m^ 



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jifi/Ms are (iamfdwith Jare Divino, <md yattca^ 
it> wthing that can hefomd fa^lt withy finct y$% 
6ave thcH the i»hle Power of the Matimt taiack 
you. 

The Kieg feem'd well pleas'd with the Ad- 
vice, and r^foly'd to put it in execution, the 
time fi>r JLleCtiott coming on,his A^nts weiji; 
t^ ^, j;he Bojrwilghs^and ftai-'d ni> bribes toget; 
Men fit for the turii, an/l capable of being 0«i- _ 
nag'd by thp CourtjfQ. about X-*)f(^^ thfii 
IParliament meets, a^dcai'e was taken to have 
Sir John Bujby chofen Speaker, and Sir WiHiam 
Mtggat and Sir Henry Green were the chief Ma- 
nners of the.CourtCaufe ; Men who were 
igiQ9ra^t,CQyetoys,a;}danibiifipus: Norraufl 
M^9. JLegtve oiat their Flattery^ Sir Joh;^ Buiki i^ 
lijsSF^^hes no); being cojjtented tagive thei- 
i^ing J[;i? due Titles. of. Hoiwur,. but fuch 4$ 
were fitter for th^eJVJfijefty pi tiie Aimighty,: 
than fi)r W E^J^riWy ^^^i^ice, , ' /, 

iSuch a Power had Gold and this Methodf 
with the Parliament, that meeting in the be- 
ginning of the Year 1^98, at Shrewsbury^ the 
King, by the Intereft he had made among *era, 
caus'd not only all the Proceedings of the Par- 
liajijent in;the te^thpf his Reign Twhifh were 
great'Aflferters of Liberty/to be condemn'd 
aodannull'd, but even obcain'4 a Ceaeeffiofk- 
. of 'em. That after the prefent Parliament , 
fliould break up, its whole Power ihould be 
confer'd upon, and remain in certain Perfons 
hj them particularly nam'd, or any feven or 
cig&m 'em, who by vertue of fuch Power 

"granted 



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granted did afterwards proceed to adand de* 
teririine many things concerning the publick 
ftate of the Nation, projterly the Biifinefs of^a 
ParUament. , . . 

Yet, in coiifidance of th ji Method, the Earl 
o{ Nottimh/m loft his Country, and the King 
himfelf his Crown ; for there is fuch a Love of 
Liberty fixM in this Nation, that no Coiirr yet. 
has been able to overthrow it ; as nioft Cohf ts 
/except this prefent, where Patriots only pre- 
vail; have made it their fruitiefs Endeavours 
to do. 

The Guinea. perceivM by tiiis time that t 
^rew fleepy, and therefore excufing himfe^ 
tor the length of his Entertainment, after two 
others had fpent fome Time in it, hopM the 
Variety of the Matter would make Amends 
for the long tedioufnefs of the Narration} and 
fb we all committed our felves to Silence* 



The EnJL of the Second Nights Entertainment. 



THE 



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II, 



^T H E 

Third Nights Entertainment . 

I 

GAMING. 

THO' much of the taft Night was fpent 
in the Accounts my Golden Spies had 
given me, yet I loft good part of wliat re- 
mainM, in ruminating on what I had heard- 
Ithat had falflyabus'd myfelf with an Opi- 
nion, that none were worfe than my felf, was 
ftrangely furprizM to find Men guilty of fuch 
Crimes as would never enter into the Heart of 
Man to ad or imagine : Is it poffible ^faid I 
to my felf; that all thofe Maxims of Right 
and Wrong, of Virtue and Vice, which I have 
learnt from my Childhood, and read confirmed 
in the Commonwealths of old, fhould be no- 
thing but a vain Speculation, that only fervesf 
to miflead him who believes it into Ruin and 
Perdition? Can it be, that what feems to be 
founded on the Criterion of Truth, Evidence^ 
ftould indeed be only Matter of meer Scepti- 
cifm ? And, that thofe who feemingly govern 
*i» World, and dired the fecret Movements 
of the State Machine, ihould lay thofe things 

I down 

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down as Maxims of Wifdom^ an<;l the facrcd 
Rules oi Prudefft Co^du^j which bear all the 
Marks of a Confummate and moft Diabolical 
Villany ? This ftill raisM my Wonder to a 

freater height,to confider how they could keep 
luman Society together, or that any Govern- 
ment could live, much lefs flourifh, under the 
Direftion of fucli Maxims as are deftrufttveof 
the PubhcGood and all Particular Happinefs. 
The Confufion of my Thoughts upon this 
intricate Subjeft turnM my Brain fo, that gid- 
dy with the View, I tumbled at laft into aft 
uneafie Slumber, wh'ch held me till the ap- 
proach of Day : Soon aft^r arifiag,' I put att 
but my Gumea into my Scrutore, and retiring 
into my Clofet, talcing it out, anii laying it qa 
my Table, I thusaddrefsM my, felf to it. 
. The Rdations you all gave me laft Nigjit 
have not a little difturb'd my Repofe : 'Tis 
true, I was not much affeded with the Villa;f 
nies of Italy dind Frai/ce ; the Mifery ctf Slavery 
both in Chtirch and State, under wliich' they 
groan in a different degree, would niake one 
eafily fuppofe they can renounce all the Duties 
ef Religion and Humanity : But when you 
came to advance the fame on the Great ones 
of our Nation, I confefs, I was in hopes "that 
having receivM fome Difobligation at Court, 
^u dealt with it as moft Grumbletonians do. 
Therefore llnce we are alone, pray, be candid> 
^tid kt my Judgment right in tliis Particular.; 
Is not our Court always free from thofe Villa- 
nies of the firft magnitude, which are fo well 
Kaownto-pre^il in all other Courts 2 , : 
. T ' Iain 



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^ubt m^^e^adty,' who c^Id'tedei^e'rio ■Ad- 
vantage ftoffi iihlMDihlig a Fdflty (Jh'ydU-in any " 
^g-'of this cftturd; biit l^atTl waiiHg'fe '{ie-'^ 
hmfthyihcveMlitf, fr^'\£h diaHfelfeOfjii' 
i^Avbu hiavebf yourC^dlfirttrymen^ Irtt^in-^ 
ing therii fre^frotft 'aft the Vices of othe^ Na- 
tioas I But that's ^ very great tniftak^ ;. 'IVe 
bs6rt4n maiij^CGUntti^s and Courts, and knW 
t^t the Magftitude ofVicfe' is vat ied fdm'e-' 
$knes by idiftertat Modes and Kinds. -Th'©" 
^i^^fif it*stru'e; feldom liiake fo little of Mur-* 
(fer iritheir Revenge as ttie '^mhrdrfitl^^Mn-} 
m. tlieii th^y iirid to 'th^ Mf as fma#a'€oni 
4em ill the public Depredatiods as ahy^Goftn- 
tfy' in Cht^pmd<ym ;• And it i!s tfeiiiarkabJS, thaft' 
the two great Courts'ofCcwnicouffe, the Riv^ls- 
df the £>?^///?i Gouit, I mean Kom and Vit' 
fiPks^ have 'ekoh had theif Time in eficotipag^ 
ifegthe finei' Arts and Sciences, fuch asP^V/?/^i 
*%i Poetrjy Eloc[uence^ Mttftck^Uc, bat" the 'Ek^ 
^flftoMrt has never yet thought it \ii'6rt-Ii its ' 
Vliile to • encourage Men of Art. - *^s true7 
tliere have been fonie fofwirdpufhingFeno^ 
fortified by Il^ibrance, \vlid'fharing a Tiiial^ 
finatterihgih fomeof thef^Arts, have founlf 
eafie^ccefs'td, and particular Favour lix)iiij, 
the Great Men o^Britah^-^^ho felddn^ yet hav^ 
hadDifeernment'en'ou^.to diftinguifh, orGe* 
Herofity enoiigh tbpiefera Mm of Art to a- 
bold Pretender'.' ' \ ' 

This is^ a Mark of a Scandalous Avarice, 
every one'aimjrfg. at the making his own Mar-^" 
feet ,<iftlW' Public > which is the Bubble to 
. '" - I 2 e'ry 

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no xpe V3r CM- o en op y. 

eVy Side and Party, wljile all inake a .Ck-: 
mour of theService of Frince ajod Onintry;,, 
tl-a: they may have it ia their P05srer to lby% 
only therafdvcs; jfnd fcarceaay NatioacaA 
fliow fo many FtfniUes rai$'d,aind fb maiiy/ 
BftateS'gotby the Public, as this Ijlapd, thatj 
boaftsof her Virtue and Liberty. , ^ 

My Guinea then paufing a while, calM 
fpfelytome to lay my Ear clofertohirajfince 
wliat Jieliad to Utter, was not to be trufted ^^ 
aVoice that miglit be interrupted by any otliejf^ 
I was curious enough, not to mj^e any Dif- 
ficulty of punStuaJly obferving his Directionsj 
where he unfolded fuch. Moijftrous Viqes.to. 
ths confpunding of Sexes and Nature; fwch 
prodigious Hypocrifi'es,to the.callingindoubft 
of every thing that is feid aijd done; fucb 
tdllanous Defigns, as would make one think 
that there was no other Hell, and that the 
Devil was not only Prince of the Air^ but 
Princeof the Earth. 

He puU'd off the Mask from die falfe Pa- 
triot, and ftiow'd Iiim a crufty hypocritical 
Knave,that laugh'd at the caufetefs Credulity 
«f the Pec^le, by which he made his Mark 
«f the Liberty and Property. Inihort, tli^ 
Myfteries he reveal'd are like thofe of Boftt- 
iea, wliichare not to beexposM to unhallow'd 
:py^, for fear the Senfe of Things Ihould de- ' 
iJtrck all confidance betwixt Man and Man, 
and fo put an end to Humane Society. 
Tli^fe things I refervefor a more lucky Op- 
|)oriunity ; for tho* the Piety, Public Spirit, 
Generofity, Learning, and good Scijfc of th^ 

Pre- 



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U AM TNG. 117 

Frefent Couf t muft ever ■exempt it firam aii 
parallel in this Account, yet fince the De- 
pravity of Men is fo great, that either thro' 
Biivy or Diffati^aion they will fincj fpots 
ik'thfc Sun, I ffeall not give thofe evil Incli- 
riitionsthe ^tisfaftioft of finding Fewelfoc 
their Malice in what I fhall riius publickly 
"^liv^r. Putting,therefore, my Guinea Lri my 
Pocket i left my Chamber, and took the Ali- 
as ^r as H4»»yfM^,diverted my felfwith a Bot^ 
thf and theConverfation of a Friend ; I mean 
a Companion; for,hy what I had heard, I be-; ' 
gan very much to doubt whether there were 
iriy fuch thing in the World as a Friend, fince 
every Man has his own Intereft and Self-LoVe 
ib much in his Eye, and at his. Heart, that it 
is almoft impoflible to find any Qne without 
aDefign on his Neighbour for his own advan- 
tage. > 

Returning to Town, I fell in at Bradbury^ 
'm purfuit ot a Reiation,who was one of thofe 
Fools who would put it to the determination 
of die Dice, whether his Money fliould be liis 
own or not. *Tis true,that the Dice are fome- 
tlmes very good Judges in the Cafe, deciding 
the Caufe for the poor Sharper againft the rich 
Bubble; which puts me in mind of a 3tory 
much in fevour of the Cubical Gentle- 
nien. There was a French Qemralf that being 
toow grown old, defir'd as a Retreat the Go- 
vernment of fome Province,where b^ing th be 
.l^d^t'mmeum Aiid tuum as well as criminal 
matters, the King ask'd him how he Wojald 
^% Witllout any Infightinto the Law, as ha- 

• ■■■ 1 5 VifJg 

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ving always bwn bred a Soldier? .Hdtold th^ 
King he would vcnt:ure his Maieftics difpleaf 
fure on tiie jnft difthai^e of liis . Office. He 
has thfe Place, ccMBes off with woflderftil Ap4 
plaufe, in all his Decifions ; infoniuch that ni^ 
Reputation of an able as well as juft Judg4 
went before him to Court; where being ar* 
riv'di the King w^s very inquifitivc to }moW 
how hecould'order DE&ttersw well'as to pleaft 
every body in a Poft in which theabkfl: Law-* 
yers had fail'd. He told bis Majefty, that his 
Method was thisi—r he carry *d with him to. 
the Bencha Boxaind Dice, and havjing heard 
both fides, he then threw for Plaintiff ancf 
Defdidant, and whoe\"ier bad the bigheft Dice 
carrj^'d the Caufe ; and that heieldom mift of 
judging Right by this Method, to the Satis- 
faCfion of all that heard fo well-poisM a Judg- 
ment. 

> But finding niat my Relation, I tetir'd to- 
^vards Home, defiroiis to raake.fome further- 
Enqniries.of my woaderfiil Spiics, in matters 
I did not fo very, well underftand. Being got 
intomyiBed-cliamber, and having difmils'd 
my Man,, let my: loquacious Pieces at large, 
and^th my Gttmeu laid them on tlie little 
'liable by my Bed,.into. which I. got, andde* 
fir'dthemto proceed in their ferther AcccMUt 
of the Court, which yet I thought was far firoca 
coarpleat. ■ ' ; 

To^^iumber up the. Vices, as fome Trammtn- 

m call them, laid the J/4i««« Piece, or the Vir* 

tues,as the wiler /if4/4i?/ count them jwould'be 

anendlefs.Task* • You count Ambition, Mur-* 

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N . ■) 

4 1*1 • 

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Gaming. 119 

ther by Poifbn, or Dagger, Whoredoms ; pri- 
vate dilpiatches of their own WiVes, and other 
Womens Husbands, ContratSrs, Re-contrafts 
. for advantagfe of Fortune or Revenge, great 
Hypocrifies, falfe Complaifance to thofe you 
depend on, and Infoience to our Dependants. 
You^ I fay, court Vices of the firft magni- 
tude ; we think them wife Precepts of Policy , 
to gratify our Pleafure and Intereft. You 
make a great noife about Favourites maldng 
their Fortunesrby the Goverment ; we look on 
it as a Duty, and a Cuftomary piece of Pru- 
duce, and in this we have Precedents of the 
wifeft and beft Romms ; Cato the Elder thus 
rais'd himfelf from an unkiK)wn Villager to 
the Head of the Commonwealth; Afor/W from 
a Plebeian to a feventh Confulfhip. Sj/la from 
a defperate Fortune to the Head of the World. 
Nor did any of 'em regard thofe mufty School 
Morals which teach fuch a Refpeft to others, 
not center'd all in themfelves, while Epicfet/^s 
remain'd a Slave by following the contrary 
Maxirtis. 

Thus you Gentlemen make a mighty Do 
againfl: Gaming, which is a thing that has 
prevailed over all the World, ev'n from tliis . 
to Chim it felf, where they play away their 
Wives Children, and themfelves to Slavery, 
in the Ardor of their Sport. 

I was pleas'd with his mention of Gaming, 
and defir'd him to let us know what Difcove- 
ries he had made in th» Affain Gamwgijkid 
liej^may have many ill Confequences, r will 
cot deny it, but fmceit is fo citablifli'd a Cu- 
; . I 4 ^om 

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I '^iO JL A7^ O P L D E N O P T. 

ftom, that it is a fort of Rufticity and lU-br^- 
ing not to Game, I know no otjier ;^ule pf our 
Aaions but the common U^ge and Mode of 
?n Nations^ It is a thing fo MowM in Itdy^ 
that every Village dmolf y^eld us daily Exam- 
ples of the good and evil EfFeds of it; by 
which fome poor Rogups get Riches,and other 
wealthy Fools get Beggary: and like other 
Trades it feemS a neccflary Engine of Provir 
dence,to compleat that ViciiTitudejWhicb is fp 
yifible in all things uijder tlie $un. 

The Unlucky Cafh. 

'"TT^Here was in theTown of Leg/'^r;^ a Mer- 
% chant of fome Note, who, befides his 
^dyentures at Sea^did often venture an Eftate 
by Land, and make quicker Returns by the 
Dice, than ever he could do by all the Win^ 
of the Wind. He had Jong fince, fept his 
Prentice to China^ where fpme years he had 
been his Fador,; but having got a tokrablp- 
Eftate,he returnM home for himfelf, and in ^ 
^ little Time marry M one of the moftbeaatiftil 
"Women in that part of J/^/y. Frefcpbddi. the 
Mafter kept a very good Correfppndence with 
his quondam Faoior Antonio^ and was a more 
intimate Friend tlian ordinary, prefentathis 
Wedding, and faw his Wife with Eyes nojc 
fo hofpitable as Friendfhip requu^d; but that 
in Italy ^ never enters imp the Balance mth 
Pleafure or Profit ; ifiJ^refcvbaldi finding that 
his Heart was entirely* engag'd by the Wife 
pf Jf^tonip^ was r^folv'd by one cae^s or other 

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to h^op^ Maft(ir of his Wifhes, and pofleft 
the^ir PUminU in fpight of liis own Age, and 
her, and |i*er Husbands Youth. 

He emplpy'd all his Art, fet to work all 
the Engines of this Venereal War, which are 
thoi^ght tQ be of ufe in Engagements of this 
ija^ure, fijchas Prefents, feriiaje Agents, and 
tHp te ; hut the Ladjr was not yet weary 
enough of her Hjusband, nor was her Appetite 
fo deprav'd as to prefer an old batter'd Gal- 
lant to the Vigour and Fire of a lufiy young 
Husband. Tir'd at laft with the Obftacles h? 
met with. Chance threw into his Head the 
means of accompliihing his defires, tho' with . 
the Ruin oiJntonio and his Family. Antom 
had added to the JtdtAn Itch of gaming that 
adventitious |Iabit whi<;h he had got in tjjc 
Indies, * ' ^ , 

. frffcob4(U pufh'd qn ^he Hiimpur, and eve- 
ry 4ay won fonje of .<^«/owV>V' MoJiey,allbw^^ 
ing for fomeencQuraging Intervals, which he 
had to fix his piibble to |i:s Awns : In thi^ 
maj^ier being highly in pame, Antonio loft all 
his B[.©idy-Money, and, Bills pf 'Credit, a(id 
had at laft no ftock left but himfelf arid hi$ 
Wife ; he fet both, and left both ; FrefcobaUi 
would remit nothing of his good Fortune, but 
fells him to the Galleys, a:nd takes her to liis 

owiiHoufe. ' ■ 

Yet he had another task to accomplilh, tbo' 
]»e had her in his Power. It happen'd that 
(he either djflik'd his Perfop, or his Treache- 
Q^fo for, as not to be prevaird with by any 
fintreaty to accept of his offering ^ Heart 

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Hi T&^Gd LDEN S P Y, 

both defpis'd, and hated. This gave Frefco\ 
bddi fome Trouble^ but little Pain, fince flie 
^as in his Houfe, in the Hands of his Vaflals, 
who muft aft by an implicite Obedience what- 
ever he commanded. The Night being there- 
fore come, when he wasrefolvM to admit of 
no farther delay, FUmama being in Bed, and 
in her firft fleep, by a fecret door he conveys 
himfelf into her Chamber, and quite into her 
Bed, before fhe wak'd, and fpite of her ftnig- 
ling accomplifh'd his defires. But unable to 
ftruglefor afecond Embrace, he left her, ^ till 
^le had recruited for another Encounter. He 
faw her in the Day all in Tears, which he en- 
deavourM to mitigate by Praifes of himfelf, bis 
Riches, and Power to make her Happy ;1)Ut 
ail being in vain,lie told her, that jfhe had bet- 
ter, fubmit willingly to what her Fate bad 
liibjefted her to, fioce he was refblv'd to ob- 
lige her by Force to comply with his Will till 
he was weary of her, and then he would tutti 
fcer upon the Common. But if llie would ufe 
^hofe endearing Arts of which witljoiit 
doubt by the Charafter of her Sex fhe was Mi- 
ftrefs, Ine lliould cdmmaiid both him and Ms 
j^ortune. . ; * 

* I know not how it came to pafs, whether 
thro'' Obftinacy or tiriconauerableAverfion,fl3C 
could not be work'd on to oe eafie to his Wifhes, 
fo that tirM with being oblig'd always to com- 
mit a Rape by himfelr, he orderM two of his 
Servants to hold h^, whenever he had a mind 
to fatisfie his amorous Inclinations. As tMs 
, was but an imperfect: Pleafure tQliim, fo it ex- 
' ' ' treaoily 

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tteagaly aggravated her Mlfery ; whith fhe 

jyas relblv'd to free her felf frc«n,^v*n by her 

own Death ; yet refolving not to pcrifli aJone, 

(he with a great deal of conftraint pretended 

to rdent, aSiir'd him of a Complaifaace for 

his Paitioa, that would bemore agreeable tq 

his Wifties. Which fhje obferving for fome 

time, had procured her felf a greater Liberty 

than ufual, and in him a Confidance that he* , 

tray'd him to his Ruin* For having by this 

mtans fecretly got a Razor into Bed, in his 

firft fleep fhe difpatched him by cutting his 

Throat ; and not fatisfy'd with this, fhe cut 

off the oiFending Parts, and having provided 

ber felf with fome lAjpnty and Jewels^ fhe 

0ade her Efcape, and arriving at [die Pkoe 

*rhere lier Husband was in the Galleys,: [hff 

paid his Ranfom, and fet him at Libeityj 

which charm'd him beyond meafure, fo that; 

he would have proceeded to the Rights of a 

Husband , Ihe utterly refiis'd hira^ — No^ 

(fakl fhe) Antonio^you hdve dealt hy me toe n^ucB 

like. A Fool and a VUlain evertoharue £nj thing to 

<fo mth me more \you have brought me into too much 

Quiitto efcApe long the Pu^^hment of the Law *^ 

)tt ds I once lov^dyoUy I ha^ here fet yos at Li- 

If^t^ mth the Prize of my Honour and Frefcobal* 

di's Blood. Provide for your felfy lefi you jbare 

^ Fate. Kjiowhow to value your felf snd your 

iionour more^ knd if it bejoffihle for you^after what 

pH have dohe^ to enjoy Tranqutltty^ may you find 

^ in Abundance. For my fart ^1 have determined 

f^'mj Jelf^ and mil this moment return to Leghorn 

¥^jur render my felf to jF^/w^ 

• Jintonio 

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15^ J. Off \JO L D EN WP r. ~ 

Antonio ^lA aU he CQiild to perfwdds h^ 
from fo fatal a Refolutioii, and that finceflie 
had fo happily pfcaped, not to put her Life in^ 
in dangcr,wliich he did^as he ought to do) va* 
hie much more than his' own. But all pcrfya*' 
fions were in vain, the next morning fhefet 
out for Leghorn^ and he follow'd her fo clofe 
that they arrivM juft together, he ftill diffwa, 
ded her from entring the Town,but all in vain, 
for iThe went dire£tly to theMagiftrate's Houfc, 
and told him, that (he was come to lurrerider 
her. felf up to Juftice for the Murder ofFrefco^ 
idUi , who had receiv'd his Death by her 
Hands. V 

She had no fooner done, hut Antonio imtr^ 
posM, and told the Judge that flie was macL 
for iu was he who had murder'd FreJcobaUi m 
revenge of the Cheats he had put upon hini 
in Play,by which he had noi; only ruin*d him, 
but fold him to the Galleys. 

My Lord, (interrupted Eamnia) the falfityt 
of this is evident, for Antonio was a Slave iflt 
the Galleys when Frefcohddi was kill'd, with 
whofe Money \ redeem'd my unjuft Husband. 
TWs Goriteft held fome time,till the Judge en- 
quiring into the whole Story, was wonder- 
hilly touch'd -with the Narration ; but Mur- 
der being Deatluhe could not but commit her; 
yet took care fo to reprefent the matter at. 
Court, that Frefcohddi'^ Death was look'd on' 
as a juft Punifhment of his Barbarity; and Ed~ 
wAnix pardon'd the Crime. Antonio was 
banifti'd for his unjuft dealing by fi^ch a Wife, 
vet had his Exile, remitted by t^r Mediation^ 
i ... • ' • ^Q^^ ■ 

i 

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, Ipe (jmuct^ LOST. *35 

However, nothing could prevail with her to 
Bw with Aatoftio any moi^ ; but fliutting her 
feif upin a, Nunnery, ftiefpent her ftiort re- 
mains of Life in Prayer and Pennance, for (lie 
(k?d in Icfs than a Year after her Enclofure j 
and Araonio pin'daway in a melancholy Soli- 
tude a few months aftjej;. ■ 

This (affum'dmy Utthf reach Louis>d'Or) 
is an Argument of the.aboniinable Folly ana 




its Mifchief as in moft places where k reigns : 
It has debauch'd moft families in the King- 
dopi,and brougjit mai^y to irretrievable Ruin. 
It h^ 5aftardiz.'d the Nobility, yet fome have 
faade their Fortune and enpbled their, Blood 
fyit,asif itwereanEj(ceUence equal to the 
braveft Martial Atcliievements : Monf. Cha- 
milUrd, from a petty Counfellor of the J^arljia-, 
went of Paruy became (by playinjg weU at 
^Hiards) Firft Minifter of State. 'Tis true, we 
are fomething refin*d ini Morals aUI'talitme: 
fince the Miniftry of Cardinal Maz^rme, but 
wecgn by no means come to the Perfedion of. 
the Covert ofRome,t<^ call Vice r*V/ae, ancl Vir- 
tue Folly. Indeed fome few Politicians aft as 
if they were of that very Opinion, yet they keep 
a Decorum in their PrpfelTioqs^and double their 
Villanies by a convenient and ftrong Hy pocriile. 
Nay, in this Very Evil of Gamingour Court has 
qnuchreformM the Abule, which was grown to 
a vaft height, by forbidding BaJltt and other. 
Games of great Sums and great Chance, and !»«' 

ik 

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1^ Ibe K:xotJ>Mvt i>>Y. 
ble t&greit Cheats^ yee the Hufflotiri$ AilifB 
r'udicateid) a»ncft tobe eiMtretjr es^'d wti^oot 
leveitr La\«^ - Mtxif. €biM}fiW'</'O)0^it)a'hts Hiie 
to hi$ SkiM in one&k of Gstme, tmy* pybafKttci 
eXcUsM W the Fa^ouHs fte Ii(as beHbivir'd on f(M) 
SccWBct^eb, who hatVbtatiKt eb^frij^ji Figure tqs 
being the Appendix of Gamiflg^ ^ttipY^thc KiJt 
there iy orie^^ wholn by tvriy oTrWi<5iilt! tfte ToWn 
hasealfd the Ghervalifer A (?*/?!*/§»*;' :«pift>b wa«' 




a petitl^cce how ahd'tfteb, hcindftftfibiBfl^f tooSf 
care to iiftprove itlby Crarningwitfi^ftis Eqoa& 
tin by good Luck artd Addrefe 'he efJdrcas*d'hw 
Scock, to be able to '^t:a'Ij>midX^'^^3t^ 
with aGehtlemarithit; xvas playfn]^ ftii^a ^r^at 
^al of Money ; ah fhdulgence wl^iiU Men <rf 
(^lity dre very free of to Scoundrels,- .tfi©*fel* 
doto'to Men 6f ^enfe " ' * • ' • 

This fbon enabled bim to throw afidq his hUne 
Apr6tr, and entertain' Xome more^plring Pro* 
j^Sf by which he try'd one day to rhatke a con-' 
ftderable Figure in tt?e Town, few oi; none beihg 
fb juft to themfelves to exaoiin Whb and whence 
tte Moita! IS, that makes the Appearance of ?t 
Gentleman, and vfentures his Money: - He firfl* 
getslntO the Ordinaries, among the Foreigners,- 
who are pretty nunierous in Paris, by whom he 
rai^'d his Scock to about a thou^nd Lhisd'OriSt 
then being unwilling to run any ifazard,. took, 
up afaferCourfe, and fiiequented the Baf^t and 
Ifozard* tables of better fafhion, and being tho- 
rt)Wly acquainted with all who play'd, lent out 
bis Mfoncy, making 5 or toper Ce»t, in a Night, 
'"* befidei 

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befidesgqbg jiwwf </'0r by the bye with the 
Fortunate. . , 

Being now!gro:wn rich, he fees up bis Coach, 
and by I knpw not what means comes acquain- 
ted with MonHC^ftMii^W/vvho, managii^ the 
l!realiire of' the whole Kingdotn^and being prime 
Minider of State, had abundance of valuable 
Places in hfsGifc, fet oe'r Js^owM one of any 
value on a Map pfMerit oi; L^riung: Mr. Racine 
(aoexcelkpcPoet) dyit^ he left, among other 
Plaqes, one. th^ was a perfef^i/w Cure^ of about 
^oPiftqleisaYear ;. Mr.Ci&^/fe (a v^ry ingp- 
Djous young Map) fucceeds htm* but bapningta 
bf pre£br'd to a Poft of more v^ue, this becanae 
vacainr,and io.theGiftof Ci>«f»i/Ai/-^« whpinalt; 
ff<sme cpuldnot find one more worthy of ic, inu 
b^ Judgment, than the famous Chevalier^ the 
Vfry Jeftof theTown,eqi^lfy worthlefsio Mind 
and Perfon ^ hisCountenaqceconfefs'd ^heBoor, 
be had but one Eye, clupnfie in his Perfon/ aw 
I^rd in hisB^h^vipur, and 4uil in his Cpnyerfii* 
tiop; he wanted it not, while many a Man of 
Ifearolr^ W9S ftaryin^ yr'thoutbeingabie to re*. 
<;pmnaead themlelves tqtf^is Minifter of* State,- 
who wasalyvajs haid of Aqcq^toMenofPanv 
Mid opeq to Gammers and Sharpers : He yet af- 
feOs the Opinion of beipg a Wit and Man of 
Senfe, but wants enough to fljew it, by provi- 
ding \(x thofe who are more obiig'd to Fortune 
than Nature. But that's ^ <ti^iqg now quit^ out- 
of falhion in Frme^ a certain Proof of us Ipee* 
dy declining, , 

Icould 

,'• • • . » ' * 

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/ 



\iO JL jyc vr <7 J- JJ B N OPT. 

I could |tve you the Chiradldrs erf" (evettt c^' 
therGam^ttersin faris^ wlio have rsusVi tbcm- 
iclves from the 0>ach Tail to their Lord's Table 
and Lddy's Bed, but thole are things now <tf e'ry 
days experience; and you can't pai6 the Stroeti 
Without leeing Sharpors as well as Quacks in 
their Coaches. 

But the Infedion is fpread evien among the 
Nobility J they play not now for Diverfion, asf 
formerly ,and on the fqinre, but Lordsfand l>G^et 
turn Sharpers, and take the Trade out of the 
hands of the Scoundrels. There Was a cert^d^ 
Marquis of a very great Fortune, and who hail 
been deerh'd not only a Man of ^afe, but eveh a 
Critic and Poet ; who being cat up with Avf^ 
rice, that Parcimony would not (ktisliehis Thirft 
of Oann: Refolviog therefore to 4ct up fon»: 
Oamefter of the wor(V(brtj as not defigningever - 
to play fair : To learn to cogg a Dy e,^ he had for 
fome Nights tc^ether ty'd down his Finger, t* 
bring it to a habitual pofture of managing it to 
/advantage. This v^ Nobleman Arequeotiagf 
4he pubficGaming-hoij(es,tho' naturally a ^xmxI 
iiat^hty Man, Would fubmit to a familiarity with 
the mc^ infamous of People, if he thought be 
could bubble 'em of but xo Louis J^Orts, hanansg 
the reft was a Fellow, who living at the fag*end 
of the Town, had picht up about 500 Loms d'Ori 
by dealing in Ofials among the Poor : This Fel- 
low was lb mad as to venture wfattt he hdd got 
with much Induftry and Pains, at the Uncertain- 
^ of a merry Main ; but that he might ha vethe^ 
faired Play for his Money, he would frequent, 
only thole Tables where the Quality was. The 

Marquis 

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Mflir^iiis {boh fi^UiKl him out, and proving very 
mn^h^nt tahtrPirefolvM to have the Bubble 
(o bimfelf. The f^an.was tranfporcfed at being 
tafeeimotice of byvone of his QijaHty^ and fo he 
fwallpw'd the Bait. Thfe Offal-man had woa 
about z y Pieces, and breaking up from Play, ray 
Lord Marquis took him up in bis Coach to fet 
hfin down »eair home, but indeed carries him to 
hiscrwaHoufe, and bubbl'd him th^t Night of 
ail heLhad about hjm. He treated him handfom* 
Iff inviting him thither often, and fo difraiis^d 
Kia h^hly fatisfisd with the lols of his Money 
ai^ jjm gaining his Lordihip*? Ac<]^uaintancc. , 
"This held foroe time ; theOifal-man won in 
pifelkfornctimest but was (ure always to lofe Iri 
pHvate, till at Uft 1;he Marquis had ^^uite ftript 
hwu What to dp he knew not, having left nei- 
tfcr>himfclfnwiiis Family any thing to fubfift 
^n ; but at lafl riefolv!4 to try what r he Marquis 
Wcttitd do foi: hiiiH. who had won much the grea- 
twpftft of hit Money : lb he comes to my Lords, 
W« adnaitted asufijal, but appearing very pen- 
&^c^ and theiCaufe being ask'd, the poor Fellovv 
c<«ifels!d hw Folly,, defiring his Lordlhip to takef 
fomePityon h^condiiion, and give himfome- 
^Wogto begin the World ^gain,and provide for 
hb Faodly • //^y ir(?, faid the Marquis, thou art an 
^^ Rt^e^ to go i^iU throw Mtay thySubJlanceat; 
^^?w^ J thoM. art nff, tjybe trujled j for fince thott 
^^jptfucb an Itch^ t.o}rufi thee With /Honey is to 
i^^it'frommyfelftofome otljer^ for thou It onfy 
^^bePorteref it jpf^me Sharper. Go get thee out 
i^timifeyffi^Mik^Cow^nyforOffal-men; awaj^ 
mny Serm^nts ^fe joh (amily. Ah ! my LorJf 

K Jomc ^ 



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159 i/»^ ^,0 I.DEN OPY. 

fomefiiy^ cryM the poor Fefloy; W^dt m t 
dp? I have not one Farthi/fg in the WcrUy to h^ 
Bread for mj/felfand, Famip, Whyyjoit Rogttty 
(faid the Mai;quis; wouUjouhave me keep jmr 
FamH} f Go and hang thy fflf, ifthm tanfgttpa, 
. Idonej, .:* 

Thus turning him out ofdoors, the Filfofr 
took the Marquis's Advice, and went immc* 
diately and hahg'd himfeif. A terrible Exam* 
pie to fuch Fools as throw away their Fortuafis 
tx. Gaming. -■■:' 

But this Nohle Marauis ferv'd anotter 
Tradefman as bad a Trick as this, whidi % 
made him pretty famous in h» (itray. He \m 
to do with an U pholfterer, who fiirniiVd to? 
a Coutttiy VilUy to the wordi of about % <x 900 
Piftoles ; he had often waitied on the Mart^ 
for his Money ,but got nothing but feir Woods^ 
till at laft he was &in xq fpeak fb preflin^X'^ 
that the Marquis appoinficd bira a Time lb 
tome and receive his Money. \ The man was 
.extfeamJy pleas'd at hisSuocefe, and JrcturiK 
jpttnftually at the time appointed : He wasjn- 
troduc'd with all the Civility ima^nabk, had 
into my Lord's Clofetj where his Ldrdfti^ be- 
ing at Breafcfaft, he was madetoiit dowJQ ^ 
drink fome fine Wine, being affur'd that wbeB 
his Steward came he ihouW l^ paid all hiis Mo- 
ney. The Time in the; nifan while hai^i^ 
'^ii their hands, the Marquis ask'd th^ Tra^ 
.man if he could pky at any fort qf Gaine, jB? 
Cards, Tabks, or Dice; ^herefdie^Tfaat be 
ynderftood Trick-track as well a& tFK^ft M^: 
This News was very plwdTicig to^M^rqius* 

for 

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^f t!hat^^^asaMa'ft€^of; tW he perfeaiv 
fcaey hciw to difguife his Mastery,' till he liaa 
fix*d his Bubble : Thishe'efFc8:ualJy exechted^ 
hiving loft fome Crowns to him, till noW hot 
jnlftay, tbeydOublM their Bets ', iheMarquii 
^jm tf/o Gaines and lofes one, which raiies ' 
the Trader to a deeper Game, tiU at laft he was 
fflaha^^ ib finely, that he had ^oft mod of tin; 
Money he Came to rtceive* 
'The* 0pholfterer b^an to fume, telling the 
Marquis he would |)Jay no longer, fince hehadf 
not p^tyMfeir with hiifl. When finooth words ' 
^^(JuIdTJOt do, the Marqais buUy'd, affuring 
htni(^a gOodBaftinade by his Servants, for 
aili^fqlence thatpugiifc ndt to be pardon'd.; 
Wtiihponfideration of his Lofs, he would pay 
him the remainder of his Money, provided lie 
wpuld never C0me near hisi;Houfe more. The , 
Uphd^tier knew not what to do, curs'd his 
own M,y, beg'd the Marquis's Parclon, and 
rejeiv'd about Oo Lxmis ^Qresy (what reraain'd 
of his Debt; needing no Threats to keep from 
a ^ce.wherc he could expeft to meet nothing 
hat jQeftf aOiion. It was the Fellow's good for-^ 
tune, that it was not his All ; he could yet 
keep up his Payments, and by a thrifty llife 
afterwards made Ibifl to proiVide for his FaM- 
ly; bat put the Marquis ever after in his Littn 

Yet this Marquis, as ctinningas heisj ind 
temucli as he is in with all the Shaipers, had a. 
notably Tridk put upon him by three or fdi|r 
^inefVers of thii^beft ^redit and figure. 'Twas 
hcfi)rehai9dagi'e^dam<xig'emfelves^ to let the 
• ' ^ %» Mar^ 

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Marquis into the Secret^ by pretendisg to tafe 
him into ar Bubble, from- whoip thSgf projxKM 
to win at leaft three 6r four thbufend Piftoles a 
man: But they fo ordered the matter^ that 
-while th^Marqiits thought himfelf one of the 
Sharpers, he wa& the only Bubble, iofing in one 
•Night 6000 Louts iTOres^ which they di^^idcd 
^amoHg 'emfelves, as a lawful Tpophy won 
from an Invader of their Frftvinte*. . ; 

Buttliere would be fto end of relating the 
Adveiituresof tbis natUt*^ which are th^Bufi- 
'nefs andPra<3:ice of folnany hund^drfs as; live 
jlieerly on the Elbow ; were a truef Hiftory of 
the Aas and Deeds of riiis^noble Marcgii5i atone 
committed to Writing^y bis 'CharaQ:^r %btifld 
be^as fingulfitr imong' Pofterity as-^is in the 
prefent Age. • 1 - -^ • ^ 

But if thefe are the Diforders among tte 
Men, thofe it brings atnong the Ladies are tioi 
fewer, or of lefs dangerous confequehce; Parif 
and the Court, for many Yieart, had given dai- 
ly Proofs of it before there was any llc^putto 
'it, which has not be0n foextenfive as wildly o 
fupprefs th€ Eagernefs of tbe Ladies iixGmi/^ 
and the Irregularities it |M^oduCes. ; \ - * 

The rctir Ektravapdni. ^-^ 

MAdam de J^ontpehjler'V^zs aybungXa^ 
of infinite Beauties of Body and^Aiind, 
lor fhe had as rtiany Chafrns in her WityA^ file 
Ifad in her Face,' Shape,^and Mien ; al^ thefe 
were heightened with perfed M6d€fti^,yetac- 
^t;oilipcwied witba fpriglitly-Gaiety,tlkt-^ 
^" - .....' her 

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ker as tempting as inmcibk. This Gha* 
rafter fhc maintained fome timeaft^ fliecame 
to Courtyand her Husband was env}?Mas the 
Happiefl: Man in all the large Dominions ojf 
LEWIS the GreAt. But the Court, MT^hidi is 
a place of glorious improvement,in time worked 
on her, Temper,and fet at liberty the Woma^ff 
in her, wljifly afterwards playd its Part to thjB. 
utmoft. - c 

The Ladies of the Court firft taught her 
to play, then brought her into Gompaay that 
run the Humour up to tlie height, which al- 
ways having a Spice qf Avarjce ia it, hit Ma-** 
dam Montfenfierh Temper fo exadly^ that fbe 
exceeded ibon all theGameftersof either tlie 
Male or Female Sex in thofe Parts. But tjjo? 
W defires of Gain were infinite, yet her Luck 
Was not lb complaifant to hei^ Wifbes; Jhe 
ofenloft^ and was at lafl: forc'd* to ftrain her 
Credit to fupply her JLuft of Play ; and when 
that was fpent, unable to forbear the Cards^ 
and as una Die to prevail with Manjieur her Huf- 
band to fupply her Extravagance that way, 
fte began to refleQ: wliich way fhe ftipuld oe ^ 
able to fupply her Wants without him. She 
therefore threw afide her former refe wednefs, 
and admitted the AddreiTes of the many 
that admirM her beyond tlielr own Happinefs ; 
Jjay,{he began to learn to Coayiet it at laft, 
but yet kept witliin the Bounds Qf Honour. 
She would provoke her Lovers to play With 
her, who ot courfemuft lofe their Money tq 
h^3j iatppes that Gold genteely thus throwa 
into lKrI^p,wouldinak« a.i>^)»4f of her^ Bbt 

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i:^4- Ti^e Go lde^wSpV. 

Ihe kept off till Ihe Ited ruinM {bmis, aui4 tif*(i 

thd iw,wIlo would ndt be fuchFools to thrpw 

away certain Mgney for an uncertain Pavcwr, 

So that finaing at laft that flw muft coftie clo- 

' fer to- the pointy- and give real Satisfaction be-. 

■■- ibreone Man, whofePurfe might fypply her 

' Extravagant Gaming : and fay {bme ntrmizes 

revive the Hopes of others, lofer as to make 

'em Bubbles to thofe Hop^^which ftie refoly'd 

to gratify wheye ihe could keep them ho^lon* 

ger alive without it, ^ 

The fii-ft happy Man \(ras Vattder Vtrmn a 
Dutflmaitf whomwnaTapfter in the Halite, 
by lucky Hits dnd good Management -had 
arrivM to a yaft ftock of Money. Madam 
' M(mtpeftjier*s Eyes, Wit and Mien had warrij'd 
his Fiegmatic Conftitution into Love, and his 
Money had drawn her Thoughts to make him 
her BubWe. Vtmier Ktr>»/>wa§ a goodly port- 
ly Fellow, and one whofe Perfon might picafe 
a Woman "\vcn enough, whofe Inclinations 
' were tha:t way. But then he was in his^on- 
^ terfation a dull heavy lump, without Si)irit- or 
' Vivacity ; yet his Mon^y fopply'd all to ttts 
' l4dy, whofe tendre for Money was greater 
than tor xMari ; a perfeft Mercenary to her Ha^ 
-tiire, who would deny no Favour forGoldjflor 
,; grant any without it J withitthemoft worthr 
kfe Wretch was an Adonis y witbaut it the inw^ 
meritorious had no Charm. ? 

Shcdid-nOt Jiowevei* yield to P4i»^^^- 

»'*f, tillfhe had frara^ his Complaifeiioc'tcl 

. %s Utnwft flrretch I and- tift hegrew as ihJ^- 

ft^t-'fppthi Fiycmrsiife tl»3tt6^ 

- ? .V .... ... ...■.;. \. ^v . • , , ' .- . r , , .. , ..gi^AtlY' 

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' tkntif piirchas*d, as flie was to be. Miftre6<^ 
flKyreof his <^ol(i,t6 throw laway toothvrs at 
Gaining. . . v 

The Appointment at laft bcin^ made, Vkfu 
Jer yitrmin avet^ofd at the Happioefsyiadulges 
himfelftill thehappy mtfiateyaccordin|to th^ 
kudable Culiom of fats Q^untry, with tlie 
Bottle and an intimate Frkod . or two, who 
by his difcsurre had diicover'd to what Coun> 
Iry he was bound^and tb^efore to make them- 
felveslport, chey took care to convey fome- 
thinginto hisGkrs, that in a. few Hours would 
havefuch an BSk6t, as wpuld put. both Inm 
and the Lady into a milerable Condition. 

The Hour is come, and away fpeeds F*>ifier 
Vermn^ is admitted to theladys Room, an|i 
after a ndile Prefent, they venture to Berf-j 
where what was done I leave to themfelves: 
but they had not fpent much time in theje 
their Enj(^ment$ before a difmalCataftropl^ 
attended the Lovers, too fecure of their fiip- 
pihefs from abroad, without fufpeftihg any 
Enemy within. . ViaUer Verinin^ who had per*, 
form'd like a Lover of Vigour, attempting- thjp 
feme Race crfPleafure again,the unlucky Doli? 
given by his Bolbm Friends forcM an unfor- 
tunate Paflage both upwards and downwards, 
and in fuch abundance, diat the poor Lady 
quite frighted out of her Wits, fcrcamsom,and 
nies in a miferable Condition from the £ed in 
her ^hift, leaving th« HW^ in a moft e.xpir- 
jfig Condition. Thetnii|f Maid flits to h«r 
'Miftreis,alarm'd with tlienoife, but was al- 
mdft ftruckdownw^ theabonunabif ^m^ 

|C 4 when 

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1 56 The Golden Srt. 

-when file came to the Bed. The KnigM; w**] 

4eft to Ihijft for himfelf, while Atigd tooJc ^x^ 

to recover her Lady, by ftripping and wdftiing 

lier all over in a Bath that was at the other end 

^f theHoufe^ and whither Vtrmin could by 

' no means be admitted. ' 

What to do he tould not tell, ke ftill M- 

^mbogu'd, he ftill purgM to extremity, found 

•jhimfelf as fick within as ftlnking without; 

he heard that the Hourappi-mchM of Monfl 

de Montfenfter's Return, and did not believe 

matters would be amended by his finding hira 

4n*that Condition in his Houfe, and his Lady's 

Bed. In jfhort, there being ho Remedy, ii6 

w^as fain to drefs hirhfelf in that condition,an(J 

f:arce able to move,to get out into the Strae^> 

/and make the beft of his way to fome Bagma^ 

■ or his own Lodging. TheEyening was darjf, 

-yet as Fate would have it, one of his CompaF 

nions half drunk, comes by with a Light, and 

if new him ;i)y his Cloaths, reels up to hiffl, 

«^nd going to. embrace him, finds fuch an ufl" 

-favory flavour felute his Nofp, that he kept at 

^i little more diftance from him; he lookM very 

i-pale,and every now and then was taken with 

iMspafr EviL--" . : -. • ■ '* ■ 

' * ^Hi^'Fiiend fiiiding him very ill^ he enquir'^ 

4^m6 the matter, but being unaWe to ftand qr 

-tyfc^they went into the firftC^^^^, whence 

-fencting iiome for Linnea^nd his Servant|be 

-'Ni^'^s^theretbr^ut.to Bed, but continuing ^8, 

f'^attdeir^P^rmmMd ids Friend, that he verily 

-believ'dthat^te was poifonM by a Ladyvrl^ 

tiad thatf fligtttgrantedJbim the FayQnr of ^ft- 

^- • ^ -^ ,. V ' '' ' kiPg 

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^gh«- Husband a Cuckold, and (b related 
ipiim the Adventure with this particular,that 
alterlie had drunk a Dilh of Chocolate with 
her in the Intervals of Love, he found that 
ftrange alteration in himfelf, nor did he exped 
to live till the Morning. But his Friend per^ 
fuaded him to fend for a Phyfician, and try 
file means of recovery, altho' it ftiould fail 
of the find. A Camefter is never fit to dye,and 
r^dom willing in cold Blood, and therefore 
Vander Vermin comply'd with his Friends Ad- 
vice J and a Phyfi^tM was cpme, but found 
no Syinptoms of a capacity of taking a Ifttlc 
Reft, where we,leavehim,and return to the 
tady,who fled from him in a moft jamentabjle 
Pickle; almoft dead, Ihe.reach'd the Bath, s^n^ 
"svith much ado by the help of Sweet Waters 
and Perfume^ qualified the filthy Odours 
urbidi her unfortunate. Lover had beftow'd 
upon • her. Ljettice ^faid the Lady; was ever ^ 
.'Woman fo unfortunate as I am, who after I 
had iveferv'd my Virtue as well as Reputa- 
tion thus long,wnen Ill-luck and my hard Star§ 
hadreduc'd me to a neceffity of yielding t<j 
this Creature, our very firft meeting fhould bj? 
lb latal to my Satisfaoiion. 'Tis ominous, or 
mherafavoural^le Warning to ine.at the be- 
ginning of niy Folly, to adventure no.' more 
into fo hazardous a Voyage. Mas, Madam^ 
^fcply'^ the M.a.idf I Am forrj for that Misfortune -^ 
ht- 1 am.Mtt of jfoar Mf»dfdtarl^adjff»oif) would 
JU at all ikjeUed with^ one difafter, . e/^cially fince 
the Evil it has produced is fo eAflji redrffs^d. But 
Iwouldnev^t more have to d^ fntkA l^t(?hi3Qan, 

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igS The GoLj^fi jr Spy. 

- p^jo^by NMion is djkvedy BftaeyftUr jw'^ 
-GuH'ri>om than dffre Ladys Arm j he- is aln^^ 
'jRHUif^y and tphen^is Stofpaeh is avinhat^^kh 
W^ne^ he eajes it in any Place tvithout^any C&emo* 

The good Lady being^ no«rwell r^efh'd, 
' and by degrees forgetting paft Misfortim^^ 

• gave a willing ea.t to her Maids Advids, which 
was not tljrownaway tipon Iwf. i^or falltng 
to Gaming again, ftie hidherufual good For- 
tune, and obtia.in'd that HjKhequer which yan-, 
der Verfnin had fill -dj^i^ being quite difguftcd 
with tranct by the laft Adventure, left fafa 
aqd Intrigues to fomentxx^ Comer. She then 

• toick'd out among thofe who adfefs'd to h^r the 
■ DUkedf iV'fWifoafJ, wf]0 wasthea paft fifty, b&t 

•a Man of a tolerable Vigour for his Age, ana 
whateverhe'wanted iA Vigour of Body,hc had 
in that of the Mind: He had long follow'd 
%/bt&zmdeMdntfe»jiervf\l\i9. fruitlcls Addi«6^ 
fill Ihe havikg loft at p1g.y, was oblig'd to b(x- 
row!i66 Louu /fO/-'/ of hlm^ which he lent 
Wiiii fuch i GraCe,that ihe eafily irhagin'd hffli 
^ proper Man for her turn, an<i therefore re- 
folv'd to "adnlit him ta thofe Favours ihe had 
iio Riglitto difpofe ol^ She Save him fuch fe- 
vouraBle tppks', and fuch diliingui(hing mo-, ' 
rals of Regard, that he had hopes, that htf 
Happiriefs would not terminate on this fidew 
fitijoyment. He therefore, to engage her the 
more, vi^as Conftantly with her at Play, and al- 
, .ways prevented her asking him for Money, by 
* Conveying it privately When he'perceiv'd he? 
^cautfns; Aa(t haviiig ipade fuchapproach^t, 

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The t^mf t^r0!ti)^.. 1 yj^ 

^ was fdblvM aot to iofe his Aim by tbe Nest 
led of any Opportuoity of finiJluiig an latnr 
gue to his Sati^^op Ia tlw Arms ^the £acK 
Lady of frMHt» 

The lucky NCnuteiscome, and a &ir Op^ 

|)of tunity, join'd with a very little Importuni'^ 

V}y vanquiftiM all the former Refolutions, an^ 

made the Duke t^Nmoun as hapmr as he thert 

defir'd: fiuthewasofaftrange Temper,that 

the moft violent ?iiffion beiore Enjoymenti 

ibon after tum'd to Indifference, Coldnefs aiid 

Averfion. The Lady ibon difcover'd tlie 

Piange, and was heartily mortify'd at th* 

Negle£t. He avoided her Company as much 

as poffibie, and when he could not. he con- 

•ceai'd that Difguft of her which k> reign'd 

^ in his Bofom. Th? Lady one day prefs'd him 

!.to know the Caufe^with a deHgn to make that 

>-ufe of his Pocket as Ihe had "formerly done,but 

he frankly told her, ■ ' - ' - } Toa^ Madam^ me 

•rrrf mglea to jfour omt iE Conduct '^ forwhnwtk 

(nee 4dmitted- me to thofe Fai^Mtrs, beyond which 

-pu hid tmhiw togive^yoHfttt An endtotht^ ^ttf" 

.{ton ichicb^ tiu pithffd^yoa might have turifd to 

jour PleAfuri atd nrf Slavery, He would not 

ftayto hear her Ahfwer,but flimg from herj 

W left the Room; 

Two fuch Misfortune in the two firft In- 
trigues fhe had ever ventured on, ihoul4,Qne 
' would 'think,have'reftor'd her to Viituei But 
whatever Refolutiqns of, Goodnefs they rais'd 
in her for a time', the next ill-luck at Flay dc- 
ftroy'd them^nd threw her into the very fame 
il^ceipriti^S of ha?:?irding h?r Happinefs as well 
. ''■.•■■• ■ '■ ••' ■• ■ ■ ■•• ., ; a^ 

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i^u JL A^ >j u jt 1} 5 3f^ o p y:. 

ts Repotatjqnj by aGrimijparGpmmePCewitl^ 
i^e Bubble pt Quality or ptW^ 

i TWs fte^r^P^h Afe% and Pati^iice 

of many a Lover, till her Husbands Chapl^inj^ 
by his Intimacy with Lettice^ and by his. own 
Obfervation, had found out ;fo much of" Iiei; 
CondiiQ: that IW refolv/d to prefer his ^uit to" 
her, he thinking that fo dehcious a, Morfel 
fm^t not entirely to go by tfieMoiithsof the 
Clergy, without paying them at leaft a Tenth. 
)He found his Opportunity of ^eing her alone 
inan undrefs. and fit for fiich-ari AfTault as 
tehad'defignd^ lying fupiHely on the Couclj 
in a warm day, and her Limbs all diftei^ded; 
ifte got to* her ride,threw himfelf on his Knees^ 
ijid feizing her Body, defir^ her not to be fur- 
priz'd tin he had fpoke a/ew* Words to her,ofl( 
which her' Ruin depended, r The Lady a lit- 
tle furpriz^d(^t not difpleas'd with the Per** 
ibn,who was very Handfom, arid very Vigo- 
fousJaskM him what lie meant by this Info- 
lent BehaviOiir ? io which the Prieit thus brief- 
fy rq>ly^d. Mad/tm^I mufi be veryjhort wthyou^ 
i am frivytq Aliyotdr Intn^ueffrom the Duke Sj 
Nemour^ ^j^n to this time^ naj^ I could ^o higher^ 
toyourfcurvy Aiventiiremih the, Dutchman ; / 
dm^ Madam yA G'enttemkn and a SchoUrytny friendi 
who obli^d ^e tQ take Orders ^ could not dive^^e 
(f Humane Nature md Humane Paffions ; Beauty 



has the fame force on me as on other Toung-^^^^ 
I have viewed your Charms fo long with defiyey th^ 




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t&atfemtthe fdf»e Hiffinefs^ mfh ihh Cpmfm^ 
tlat-lflfafl i» f)ty H^firtefS) tfidU not fail m . 
i»jj(iive»gi. 'l ■-- . ;- ■ ■• ■■ •••'■•• • 
■ Madam de Moittf^enfier^ like ia.,true Womaif; 
^eny'd all flie ha4 been cli'ai^^il 'ivith, vow*d 
Reveiige if He^id ftQt withdraw^ and to call 
bur-JCbepfefs'dlfe^any furtheij but he was 
lobfilll'of' Eiift-tsa b^ifriglifea'd with words j * 
andithejffete pr(^fftiig; the 'matter, home,' Ihcr 
eafilyjftfffePd hi&tp'iovercottie^ and was fa 
well vpteas'd wit&'hik > £ondu^, that fhe con* 
timi'd^he Intfigtrfe with iiim, till the difcavecw 
«<as'Triie€aufe'3C5^heprCQhfinfemeiitr arid thd 
iPriyhi' Flight'."; Fotf Madaia having, in com- 
|plaifente'?io her laifl: of ;^amii^V* piraidfy'd lb 
IWafiy Galknts Lufts of ^fi»«!r,it bcGafceaGonlV 
mdrt mlk, till at laAat;reaichM faci- Husbands 
Ear. This made him more sratchfiilof her 
Hfiibnsj wiiich brea^at hlra'afciaft t6 find this 
Lady- ian5therfiritfft<i(i a vciy femiliaaj.Gonvefr 
fetioni Aom whibh the Ptiefli ' ef(;apM byleap^ 
ing^'froni the-WihdD«v ina 'vd^y imcanjonicai 
. Conditii^jand the Lady to WfconfinM toji 
NiiiBiery-diirihg>oher Jius&aiiiJs life. ; And 
&i\i "waS the.uiifartun3te £ridiofia Ddsauchecy 
whichiiiA proaiii|d«tdbeei^ir6m'fudia'l^^ 







iU! 



mU:;T- Madam "^ammont-h&A ««jre l»ni- 
.^ idence andlb^ttei- %Mck, fo^ ^flie was^af- 
•tttted much in the fame ma^oner, loft all fhe 

could 

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tJtoM get of her Husband, orbnliisCredlM 
l«iid thatFund filing, was fam to nin QiiTick 
I to the Chevdier de Betuvint Hc.^asiagay 
iAskAy had a great dea^«f Moi}ey,andave]f - 
HaodibmcL WifeofhisQwti; who yet fw»*d- 
ojot (b charmiog ja his Eye >s Mad^m Gr «e^ 
w«r, becaufe ihe was his owln. It ha|>pen*9 
* that thene was a pardeular Inti macy tltwiKt 
liirfe two Lady^s, fothatth^ general^ dilco- 
xftfA all the fecvets of their fiofoms to oniea- 
jBUKhertUidersthey wietfi dfa;Nature that would 
jiot admit ofany Partner, ^dam Grmmmnf 
d»ught tfaatthe Moneyt ftue hid lofi to: thr 
Cbpvalier was of det Kiod; and therefor^ h^d 
oeiKt uAA kt^ oneByllahleoF the maxtsBiOlf, 
file found Jier! fdf underatneceffity of doii^ 
a to &vt her bwn Honour, aiid keisp their 
Friendfhip inviolate; j ' • , i . • t 

.^ l^Ckti^erb&dlQBgbaid a ieerci: i^(^' 
Ibr Madaihilp Grmmomt^ hot never durft:tittdr 
a Word df it, Jdll^heluid goth^r fo OMif^ in his , 
Debt, tjmthcir had eeafoniJobelieirejfhe would 
grant'himanv thing, ratho^tbai^ap^y to her , 
Ibisband to^diichargie fe^CQtafiderable it De^ 
inand : and tfieithe beganto d!eekreiIi9JPll£> 
oaforher,alldlIr|^ it^vHthibnie \rdiemence^ 
^S03t being one ds^ at pky,' and having loft alt 
ba Money, Niras £dxico affiy to the Utw4i0 
as ufual ; but he denied H^) wkhout aiProyooi^ 
of a private meeting, where he might have the 
liberty of coqiVi^ng^rbC the eAgernefs and 
reality of his Paflidn. She was too feir en^g'd 
-iAherPky it© fcrupkj aad therefore ^gfeei^^o 
^ thePiopflBfel^ apdappoiatslheplac^ &n^W^ 

'^ '* ' .-'■■, '. -A 



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ffl^Qlltimof l&H^our am him ^c(x>i^m^y)bi|| 
\iw$notaJ[ittlcfurprk^^ > 

teat iR)^ more. thai) ever fhedejplgnM to ^llow. { 
him J l^wever, ihchftcl placM aServ^At wi^* 
if call^ toprevcspt the ^vorflrof her Fe»rs, 
. . .TjjcCj8w4w^Ja»\viiig 
W.ao m^8LO»de&Qipntm prompcii^g Hs owii 
Cftiie^ TJta*l«^^i«afrfeiQMada^ • 

afraid to put him JAto Pdpaip /^ W^ admifteiil 

ban^hgrnAtfraif^iiyothjrj yeffome il/^^ havefuch 
a wibfy arjfi^md Pm^lmj thstm ^t be a^grj^^ 
at the Prof iffion^ m eoM^JfUeve^ 4^d whkhfisrha^ 
i^tbe 0^f.i^iahU^m^(^ 
ikatyfhaime heard w^ 4^ othr tba^^aMethad ^ 
tdking to ^Ladfes^fhp ^a.v(f Tmth fMtf^ to Jcf^ 
^w w mmtename^ Jhy Ma^/nm^ I ^^terxupte^ 
the Chevalftr) n^ht Proof s$^uIdjouJuLve(fj^ 
fi^litf^f^Pa^^i dthmk I^^e^iri>mthAgrtat^ 
efiinM4tMre^ t^§ghp for j^o^^i^u^k^J^ 
that jpe do .commonly for ameer M^uamtanpe t.Vf^ 
do$fi fibdtn^ieh mw(mldw^ theSks in 

mdpf^atin notri^u^^um^ por^d f everde^jf 
ym the command of i^Pi^rfe^ *fK\$l^h^%^: ^fp9^^^ 
^^of cqn^imim^OH. tkaf I /^4 ^^u^hp^^ a^ /j^, 
Worldi^ md.oft^Wi^jm^>tfmtjqu 
t^. of. ?ne in Fortmfe^^a^ing it^J^yW^fa^im^ 4^ 
^jtoM^uitjmrfelfof 4lljdur-Djht4 pf Honour 
^th limmry buf at thefim^ * W^^ . 4/^ ky thefiu^ 
*^i ^iiifiomm . a Rward on a jR^^^w, thatwithf 
^titnmfi defTQj. ^Ufe^ i^phemcfi exqm^ 
^orments^ A l({P^il^Wg Deffai^y n^hiiliis w/i^ok^ 
ffyyo^r juflice^ unworthy your Charms. , Itmuli 
. be * 



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^ I^^ Jt«7^ VJOX D EN op T* 

h unworthy my JuJUce indeed, (affumM Madim 
^ de Grammonf) (bould I lijlenjp forude4SmIl ds 

* * anjujt a Requefij of regdrSng-neither mfownHo^ 

nour nor my Hmhmd^s^ the Ldtps of God^ or thi, 

Duty of A PVife. ■ Noy no^ Chevalier, .you muUi 

make me f$y Lxtortionfor the Money you lent to my 

^foSy^ if you require a Compenjationfo infinitely bt^ 

* yond its vdue. I can never think the Chevalier 
fo mercenary in his Aims^ as to take the ad'OAnkAge 
of my Misfortunes to AQcomfli& my Ruin : The Of. 
fer had been more fuffortaUemdit been done mth- 
S^ fuch Bond as mi^t make my Grant the ^eii^ 
more of Fear than Inclination. i 

; J/ro/^/ (interrupted theChevalier) Mtah 
no adv^ta^ethat Fortune has given me ov^you) 
^wittnot frefsmfPaffion aw/ farther At this time^ 
that you may no more upbraid me with a thing fofdr 
from my Temper : Buty Maddm^ when I hat/dcon-' 
vinc^dyou of this Error ^ by^gii>ingy6u a. t>^fbi$» 
^cf AByou owe me^ I hope youH no more Jiu/ple^th 
pncerity of mj Love. . 

^ Saying thefewords, he rofc up, and with a 
profound rcfpeft took leave of Madani Granu 
"montyKTid the next time he met her he delivered 
i^er a Paper,wliich contsdn'd a general Releafe 
of all his Demands, Shetookit witba gracious 
Smile* Tfnsy Madam^ is a Sacrifice to^my P^^ 
yet offered with as free and hearty aZs^l ^e^'&t 
Bigot prafd to his Favourife Saint : Admit \me 
thereforeyAs a Lover worthyour Regard^ ami ion;- 
^inue not to keep me Atfuch a difianc€j as makes a 
perpetual Winter in fny Bojom^ which ifthe-Sm of 
'your Smiles /hfne not quicklf^n^ will feeM m 
to de^. . ^ , ^ •. ^ 

^' Madam 

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Xbitatt Jifdravagatit,. 145; 

, Madatn Grammont was infinitely pleas'a at 
thisPrefent, and /treating the Chevalier with 
antne Complaifahce hg could exped'in fuch a 
place, IHeretirM, fwlly refolvM never more to 
play;, left having thus efcapM the wreck of her 
Hoiiour and Reputation, flie might Iplit the 
next tiine without any Refuge; She was al- - 
vl^ays civil to th^ Chevalier when file faw him^' , 
but carefiilly avoided all Opportunities of hea- ' 
ring or trying how far his Paffion might carry 
him to the prejudice of her Virtue. The Che- 
vaHer was ho Fool, and eafily pefceiv'd fhe had 
jilted hiiti out of his Money, making fo cold i 
Return to his Paflion, that he had no reafon tO| 
expeft fhe would ever give hifri that Relief 
which alone could render himfatis^ftion. He 
j»uld notblame her for ainy breach of Promife 
or diflioiiourable Conduct, but only himfelfv 
fonqvei"-aQ:ing his Part, in throwing up the 
oWy fanireKey to hisTreafure j however, the 
more difficult he found the Conqueft^the more 
eager were his Defircs ; he Watch'd her clofer 
thaft ever he did his Wife, and waited with 
inore Diligence', than ever, yet no Hopes ap- 
pear*d ; thieLady' was fliy, tho* civily and fo he 
retntn'd in Ms ftate of Defpaif, till a fuddea 
Thought came into his Head : He could not 
Imagina Lady (a given to Gaming could at , 
once fo entirely vanquifli that Inclination fa 
rar, as not to be viron by Art to a Relapfe ; he 
Jefolv'd therefore to fet forafe Friend to draw 
ocr in,without telling him the Endhe aim*d at.' 
yiePerfon imploy*d was well acquainted with 
*H the Niceties oi this Art. and in a little timpy 

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1^6 Hbe Goi-bEK SpV. 

by an aamtrable Ad<lref%goth«: to I^^^Jg 
Jl her Mdnev, and got herconfiderabiymftts 

into theRoomM of the ufualRefpea hemj 
to pay her,aiid in hisEyeseven «««*e|^t^^^, 
and Paflion than he usM to exprefs. Sbebli^t 

athifpfefence, ^^i^^^^'.^f^^^^^ 
would have^kftofF, but beingfo deep^n^j 
wiUingtorcdueeittofuchaSum^sflie ro^ 

venture to ask of, her Husband )^^^^'^, 
broving Unkind, fhe ftrove in vain, -^.^^ 
M encreafing,till atlengtiitir'dwitJiiB^^^ 
Lr^folvM tf |iveover Her Ant^^J^^^. 

as Willing fhe,But prefs'dhc^ ^^5"^^^, 
kdgmentof the Debt; ihe fecrri'dunv^^ 
but theChcvaliei' advis'd her to it,for he WO^^ 
certainly go.to.her Husband and dem^ «i 

4 H/A^H th»^ ttat too n^atdd render me uj^f^f 

ed? touM'ivekhav^djiourJelftoan'ea^^^^ 

.thtlJidy^i^fomepariicuUrs^tho <>f/J'^f^i 

Vive me no little fain ; :iHmev«r tt muld w «; 

%}ufiie9 to try another Frimd on thts unluci) Utc^ 

Ron, vohenjott frofferydm Service, ■ . 

' He gave hir BiU.s*o the value of her » 

.Whicbilie deliver'dtothe Ghevahers Fr^ 

. within abfoluteRefolutipn of never piayi^ 

. more^ promifing to d^feharge the Ghe^^ 

Debt the firft opportunity. Now he Itf ^ 

got her agaia ia Ms power, rcfolv'd not to? ^^ 

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The Fair licira'bagant. 1 47 

fe'fodiifli a Game, as not to mike ufe of his pref- 
ifent Advantage for his own Hs^ppinefs, He 
grew v^vy importunate, plainly telling her, 
that nothing but the laft Favour could reftrain 
him froni f^inghisMoney ofMr.Gri^»^«^;5?/; 
that he had alr^dy facrific'd fo fhuch Money 
fo imaginary Joys, that therefore he muft have 
thofe which are more fubftantial. 
^ Madam Grama/^tkntw her Husbands Tem- 
per, and that he would prefentli^ imagin, that 
a Woman who had loft fo much JVf onej^ with i 
Man, would not be very fcrupufousot paying 
it at anothQ<5ame, if he would fee fuch a Cox- 
tmbto accept it fo : She was at her Wits-end 
to know what to do^ a thoufand .times curfing 
h^ own Folly, who being once dfeliver^d from 
the like piftrefs by a fmgular Favour of For- 
tune, (h& own Addrefs and tlieCapriceof the 
G4ievalier; had nmdly again thrown her fetf 
into the very feme Dilemma. She knew that 
fee muft be either newly guilty, Or be thought 
fo by him, who only could make her unhappy 
bj Inch a Sufpicion; but Ihe would rathei: 
daufc an innocent Mifery than an aggravated 
Guilt, yet fain would avoid both. 

After a mature Debate inlier Mind, flie* re- 
folvM to Jilt the Chevalier again, but ina man- 
ner more agreeable than the fornier: For tho^ 
Ihe would not admit him to her Arms, his Plea- 
iav^ could not be the left, fo long as he thought 
himfetf in her Bofom. Madam ^^ Beduvi»w2LS 
'muchof her ftature and fize, both* exquifitely ' 
ilaap'd, norwas flie in reality any thing infe- 
rtoup to her ui Beauty, tho' the depray 'd Ap^e- 

L i tke 

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14S ThcGoLDuviS^t: 

tite df her Husband (defirous of Change^mi^- 
liim flight her, becaufe his own. '•] .; 

Madam deGrammont took the firft oppor- 
tunity of getting a place of free Converfe ^^itfe 
her dear Friend Madam ^^'B^^i;^^;^, and bein^ 
alone, after fome previous Difcourfe, '< — My 
Dear, (faid fhe) I have always thou^t my 
Happinefsf as uncommon as great, in poffeififlg 
the Friend/hip of a^L^dy of fo much Senfe, as 
to be fo rarely crofsM in all the Duties of lb far 
cred a Tie as Amity, as you are. How few erf 
our Sex have any Notion of it I how mi|ck 
fewer ever reduce any part of it into Praftice! 
fuffer me therefore to value my Felicity in tfuS 
Particular extreamly. I can't imagin why thf 
Men run us down on this head, is incapable 4 
fuch a Virtue. It is the Vanity of their l4^- 
ture^ ^replied Madam de Buuvin) they would 
cngrois all that's great. and glorious to tEcm- 
felveSy tho' they perform no more than the 
weaicft ofourSex, at leaft in our days; but if 
Men are always the fame, we may )uftly fup- 
pofeit meer Boaft : Mean while I find in my 
jBqfom fiich Sentiments for my dear GramnoMty 
tliat tliere'snothing I could notfacrifice to her 
Content, Ah, my Dear! (replied Madam 
Grammont) we eafily think fo when the TrlaPs 
^at a diftance,but when prefent, fmall Difficul- 
ties ftifle all tliofe generous Notions. That's 
too unkind (aiFum'd de Beauvm) to cpme froift 
your dear Moiith, put me to that Trial, ana 
then condemn me if I plead any Excufct Tbf^ 
Aifurance (fkid GrammontjAS fo kind, fnd ut- 
ter'd with fuch an Air of Sincerity,, that ImMft 

not 

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jtJtv t^a^T £i^irav^am. 14.9 

S)t let flip an Qcicafion whereon my Life and 
appinels depends, tho* I fear it may give you 
fome Pain. Speak freely (faid Beauvin) and 
lecure of no Repulfe, if in my power, *Tis 
only in your power, my Dear, (replied Gram^ 
rnont) nor can any but your felf relieve my Di- 
ftrefs. Make no more Ceremony, (aflumM 
the other) but tell me my Part, and fee how 
cordially I'll perform it. > 

Know then, my DtSLr^CfkidGrammont) that 
I have been fuch a Fool as to be drawn intb 
Play,and that too deep to own to my Husband, 
whole fufpicious Temper you are not altoge- 
ther unacquainted with : Your Husband comb- 
ing in, I thought by the Friendfhip that was 
betwixt us I might make ufe of his Purfe, re- 
folviijg to pay him again out of my Allowance 
hy fiicTi degrees as might not be perceiv'd by 
my llusband. 'Tis true, he complied with my 
^efires, and fupplied my occafions, but would 
you believe it, my Dear ? > — Shall I proceed ? 
Can I tell you the reft ? Can I make you unea- 
fie? 'Tis impoffible, let me rather periih un- 
happjr. 

This had firM Madam Beauvin^ and made 
her the more uneafie to know the Sequel, but 
having prefs'd her Friend withimpatience,(he 
went on in this manner : Since you command 
me^yDear,Iwillproceed, Could you ima^ 
»n him guilty of fuch I^rfidy toyou, and fuch 
liijuftice to me ? He preiles me to injure both 
itiy Husband and you, or vows to betray ail* 
Tilkin ! ("interrupts Madam de BsAuviti) are 
|H my Charms then vanilhM? amlgrowjirold 

L J an4 

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and Ugly already ? Nothing of this,Ct^fied M?^ 
dam i/e Gramtnont) you are as charrair>g as heir 
fajfe; but Men, whoaccufe us of Ficklenefs^ ar^ 
the moft inconftant Creatures in the World; nay, 
they would engrofs the Folly to theaifelves, ai| 
the Prerogative of their Sex, and yet grudge us 
the innocent Liberties of our Birth : HoWever,al| 
is well yet, fet me but prevail vvi^hyou tofiip-' 
ply my place, ru makc^be Appointment, an4 
you (hall give him greater Happioefetlmn be 
could receive from mc, could I induce my felf ta 
)be falfe to you and my Husband. 

Jii ibortf Madam Gratmnont eafily prevail^ 
with lier Friend to lie in the Bed in her A)>ar^ 
mint, and receive her Husband ki the dark' al 
.his Miftrefs, not his Wife. 
' This Part fo Well play M, (he appoints the Gfi^ 
valier to come to her Houlc wben her Hut^crf 
was abroid ; (he receives him in ap Undre<s,«fi| 
more to deceive him, and fufTers him to raviih i 
thoufaod Kifles from her, till (he led him ipw 
the dark Chamber, even to the Bed, and theflJ 
giving him the (lip, left him to hb Wife. Tte 
Entertainment of new Lovers was fo long, tha* 
Mr. de Grammont returns in the mean w Wle, and 
feeing his Wife look fo charniing in her D# 
habille, was very fond and amorous upon her^ 
till at laft preiling her to go into theBcdctaffl** 
ber, (he refused, whiph Refofal coniinuingr'^^ 
grew jealaus, and fwore (he had hid her6ali«i? 
Th that Apartment, from'whorii his coming **( 
diflurb'J berU : She Was ind mighty ftrait*whai 
to do, and now few a neceffiiyvdf di(cpV*Ml^ 
fll,pr being yet more upfortufiat^ j lb aiS^ 

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htm of h,er lmiosence,Miefit*4 him to fit dbwn, 
^d |he woiilA confefs tl^e whole matter to hFm : 
With jfoinc Perfqafions heallpw'd heriime to re-. 
tofxrp his I)oubt$,and clear her own Innocence ; 
then falling oq her Knees, IQie ask'd his Pardoi^ 
for veptwing to play beyond her own Stopk,' 
and To gave him an account of all that had pa(^ 
finc^ber Ja^ misfortune^ which was all that was 
^ecipfery tolet hpr Husljand knovk'. .He<iircove- 
red his Re:&ntment fpr her playing, ^ut could not 
l^t approve of her Conduft in preferving her 
ow^ Honour, and putting his own V^^ife upoa 
hioit which when he was UttisBed pf* he told her, 
he fhoulcl be more eafie. 
• This Diiicourfe had held fo long» that (7r<iw- 
moMt's V'oice was heard by the Lover, as bufie as 
he was j the Chevalier's Wif« took this Oppor- 
iimty to get from her Husband, alluring him,^ 
Ibat (he heard Mr. Crammont in the Anticham- 
ber, bid hina lie. (till, and Ihe would go remove 
4im to a nwre fafo place whilft he ffiade his re- 
tfeit. Secure of her fclf, and ready with an Fx- 
Hife, Ihe Qonies out, to tfteno fmajl fatisfaftioa 
fif Grammonty who fpumd he had cnade a di^O* 
•vtsry pf all the Affair. She advls*d Madam Grm" 
P^.tp keep him iii fear a while, and therefore,, 
HmHt^GnmmoHt ihoutd preTs to>go into the 
JH}Qm,%nd Ma<kiin ihbulc) diffuade and wheedl9 
him thence ; aiid that while ihe went to fet hij^ 
It lU»9!rty, they would retire into the next Room 
- jmdhiwr all t;h|tpafs'd betwixt 'em.Thjs W3s pqy 
i|J ey$pi}(ipii : ^t while Madam GrapMfMt went 
««>freehioii,Mr. (^ratw^f had a few;niqutei to 
^m^ fei? ?9iGm tft ,M?fMni.^<? Bf^uvin, who 

. : . L 4 lookd 

\ 

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15^ 1^^ V^O L DEN OP Y. 

IpokMthen mfinitely qharmins;. Madam^f{z\d^ 
he^ h^v^ could the Chevalier be Jo , ignorant^ as to. 
frefer mjWife fo you^ who excel her more than the 
Siher Moon the lejfer Stars of the Nkht:? JUafiht. 
eofge o^thni ? But do both yoiirfelfsndr nie that 
^tffiice which Flejh and Blood commands : Tau^vf 
done enough for your Friendfbip to n^ Wife ^ id 
fomething in Jujticefor yourfelf and me. 

He faid much more, and prefsM his Afiair fo 
Ijandfomly, bang himfelf a very graceful Per^ 
ion, that he found Madam /af^ Beauvin likM him 
better than his Wife did the Chevalier ; hiit, 
by that time file damfe back, which w^s ' vcrj^ 
f^edily, he Ij^d made liich a progrefs, that he 
. l^ad no reafon to fufpe£t a Succefs anfwerabi^ 
tohisDefires. 

Madam de Grammont returning^ told themi' 
that tho' file had found him in st tei-rible Fear/ 
yet if fheliad not alarmM him with the near*' 
iiefs of her I^usband, fliehad been ftill in dan-i 
per of calling out for their aiHftance; biit^thaC 
he would not go till ftie had made another Ap^ 
bointment for a fecond rendezvous, which &^ 
had done. Sh^ beg-d her Husband, firice he 
Icne^ her Misfortune^ to j^y the^Peot, whieli 
fhe vi^ould allow out pf her Pin-moiiy , left on* 
of a Vanity common to Men^ he ftiould gii^ 
himfelf the liberty of talking, at the expence 
of her Reputation, . ; ' -^ 

* C?r4;^i^d^rallQwMofh9rCare,andproflii5'4* 
to {Jw-form it,^ut pleaded as yet want of A4>? 
iiey, and tliat in |;he mean while' he muft bP 
kept in his JErrpur. Wlnlft Madam Grammont 
leftthein 4 few minutes, fafc mad^ as Apj>pi»c^ 

": ^^'- — ''/''■'- ' -''^- - ' - '-^ mot 

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itent with her fair Friend to comij an hour be- 
fore the tiiure, and he would tak^ care his Wife- 
flbouldBeput of the way, and her Husband 
denied admittance. This was punftuaWy ob* 
fcrvM, and Grammont had the fatisfadion.of- 
being fully reveng'd on him who had defign'd 
him fuch foul play, and believM that he him- 
f|ilf had efcap^d the like Shame. ' • "• 

>^ Things pafsM in this manner ; when Gram^ 
wi?#, umatisfied with his Revenge till his Cucr - 
fcold was fenfible of his condition, took care tO" 
have^his Wife out of the way,and got the Che^ 
*aliei? admitted and conduced to the Bed- 
chamber, as ifexpePd the Field of Battel. He. 
eOmes, was conduced in, carried to the B^^. 
and finds a Man upon it with a Woman ; ^on*, 
chiding it to be' the Husband, ^ "wcoild have 
witfedraSvn, h\xt GrammonrXoxtm^ him by the 
Hand/ drags him to it, throws open the Cur-^;^ 
feins, and difcovers the Chevalier's Lady upon 
it, in a panic fear of the Event. The InterTiew 
was furprizing to ail hmGrammonty who had 
defign^d it. What (faid Grammont) is your bu^ 
jhitjs in' my Bedchamber^ effeciallyat an hour which 
I dedicated to Pleafure t Upeak Madam^ ({siid he, 
astohisWifej do you know ^ this Jffignat ion ^ 
Ha t ffaid he^ who have I been hapfy with ? Not 
frith my own Wife 1 I thotsgh the Charms were too 
tranfprting for her to hejlow. The Chevalier 
Confounded, did not know what to fay, till the 
Lady getting oiF the Bed, began thus : 
' 1 uw jorry for this Evtnt (fwhat was dejign^d^ 
^t^m the Em& ofpur y^ 1^ 

^ tny frknd^s depre^ have fireauently received yoi^ 

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fii her fUce^ and this day ex^ed jfou'as Ins^d to 
d^\ but haw Mr^ iSrammont cMm to deceive me t, 
kfW0 ma ^ for in alt my Careffes I took hint for the 
Cim/sUer. Madam^ Ithif^ the Event fojujiy that j 
I eannot be difpleas^d at it ; ft^ knwingnothing^of^ 
^is ^jf^r^ 1 came tolied<mn Mnd t^ke a little Reft^\ 
but finding a La^dy in the Bedy concluded it mufi be' 
inyWife^ not imagini^ that sty bodyelfe could be. 
tberty itnd tofeizswhat I thought m^ Right ; J had 
nm^in^d in Ignorance^ had not your coming in that>^ 
ii^Mnner raised my Jealoufte^ and m^de mejeiz^your 
MfLnd^ tvbei^e ill this Difcovery aroje^ invphi^b^ by\ 
kfirsnge Miracle^ we that had committed theguil^ 
¥aS are ahiefiy innocent ; and you j who have beem 
d^fitffmted in allydur Deftgns mthout the guiltj^ 
fa£iy are o»ly guHty. i 

t inthemidftofihisccmfoiionMa 
ntont tomes in, and is i»fuiit6ly furprizM td 
itui *em all to^lwr : The Chevalier wgis tbs 
Hicft confounded, begs all that was paft injgh& 
be burkd in Oblivion ; and, to purchafe it, hQ 
WOTild remit his Demands Qf the Monwh^, 
had lent her* Thus was^ the, Bubbler bubpPd^ 
and die honeft Jilt. jiked y hut finding, out tk^ 
Falfhood ctf her Friend, Ihe pf evail'd wjth heB 
Husband to leave. the Court for the Country. 
1 I could tell you a tfiouiand Example? mor^ 
irf the ill Effefts of G A m j K Qf but I mmsa^^ 
ber that I ought not to take up all your Tini|?f 
l^ut leave fome of the remaining part of thi» 
Night to my Brethren, Here my little Lmis 
dVr gave over fpeaking, and dien my Gi^^^ 
^fter a fmaD paufe, began in this manner, 

; ' *• ^ ' . ' Jgain$. 

^ Digitized by Google 



t3? 



•W 



G A M ( N Q< 

Difcoiii-fe on this as Well as theformec 

Subje£t, with* Vindication of the FoUy anct 

yic€ w€ have talkM of, I fliall likcwife fa.K 

^mething in oppofition toit. Firft,the wretch'^ 

ed State whis Country, and a Rdifh of th^ 

Pride and Vanity,appears through his ddftntr 

ftive Paradox; battlie ill cffefl: of their Fpdir 

^(^,iathe igno^afuieanddeilruc^iQnQf all th4 

People of th«r Country, is a very wfdk mo- 

fiveto engage in any of their Princi^es* W|tt| 

lie feys, indeed j fraells much of tfee CmdAVJfi^ 

hut tha t is the worft proof in th« WoJcW of it$ 

Validity and Reafon. Thus in QAmP^i h^ 

kasgiysai it a turn, as an excufcafejc Mo4e| 

and wowld raak€ you heUcve,'that there is no^ 

Aingin it of want ofSenfe or want of Hone* 

%. Hondly indeed he laughs it, ^L^amew 

.Notion of the Schools ; but xmTr^mmtm ar^ 

yet happy enough to have it in Prafiiee in all 

Degrees and Stations, and that t^ Men of thQ 

|)eft Senfe and Undemandii^s, Fools having 

not Matter enough to make an Honelt Maq 

ipf ; at kaft th^ have not yet aaiy'dto f«c^ 

m abandoned Degreeof Vice, as to reduce i| 

to Principles of R-adice, and difown thofefiiiLr 

ternal Truths on which the Maxims of JVfor 

faiity ate founded. If the Praiiice of VJKW 

jsnot fo^eneral as it might he,, yet all allow 

theExcelenceof ir, 

*'^ ■•■ ■'..,. . '■ . Thus 



d byGoogk 



Ijo xw vj u JU JO e N OPT. 

Thusin' Gaming it felf, fcarch all the Court^ 
City, and Country, and you fhall not (or very 
rarely indeed) find one Man of Senfe a B^ 
got to the Folly. Your pradicM Gameftcrsi 
yourSharpersctf all forts, from the Lord to thk 
Footman, are the moft ignorant and fenfcleft 
Rogues of the Creation. The Fafhion an4 
in Company have, Iconfefs, drawn in fomt 
Men of tolerable Underftandiilg,but fcarce one 
of fine Parts. The Sharpers of Quality are 
Men witlK>ut Honour,Generofity or Senfe,and 
have nothing to diftinguifh them from the 
jVlob but their Title. They, like our Sigriuat 
here,alter the diftinftion of Right and Wron^ 
call a Debt a Man is bubbled of in Play,a Debt 
of Honour ; but that which is due for Goods 
received fi^om a Tradefman they nev^r pay 
lill they are forc'd^by having theirCoaches and 
Horfesf feiz'd as they ridfe the Streets. Tf\e 
vulgar Sharf>er generally rifes from the Refuic 
iaiid Scum of the People, and having no fente 
of Honour, Riches, or Religion, he is qua-* 
lifyM to ftick at no Roguery that will fill his 
Pocket, and raife him to make a figure in a 
Coach, whofe.original Station,both by Nature 
and Fortune, was at its Tail. Yet when thefe 
abandoned Wr>etches have got Money enouglu 
they are admitted to the Tables of Lords, and 
the Beds of Ladies. Thofe very FeIlows,wh9 
(without the Advantages which they derive 
fr^mi Cheating ) womd .have made their 
Servants ha\{e kickM out of doors, now. ^ 
their Succefs of Roguery they carefs in thetf 
^ibms. They hang the poor Thief, that rohs 

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JIgamit U A M I N G. 157 

but for Siibfiftence, and takes away but half a 
Ctown, when they proteO: and refpeft thd 
Thief pfaGamefter,whohas bubfaPd (that is, 
robb'd) hundreds ot their Eftates. TheMea 
bf Quality can, without any Indignation, fee 
Sir William walk in aThredbare Coat and Pifs^ 
burnt Wigg^and thoughtlefs S — — s in his 
Gbach and Six. 'Tis true, a Man that is fo 
egregious a FoOl as to lole an Eftate to a Shar- 
per, deferves as little Pity and Redrefs as he 
that Ventures his Health with a known andt 
common Whore ; 'tis true, both may efcape 
J)y prodigious Accident, but that is owing 16 
Fortunej^not thfeir Prudence. Yet methinks 
Men of Quality,who are proud enough in the 
wrong place, mould value their Dignity more 
than to projftitute it to the Power ot Sharpers; 
and the beft Remedy that I know of, is to 
make all Summs loft at play forfeited to the 
State.^ ' 

Tlie Parliament confifting of Men that* are,^ 
have been, or are to be marry^d to a ftrangQ 
fort of Infatuation, I wonder they don't put at 
ft9P to that Evil that may ruin their Sons, 
debauch their Wives and Daughters, and ren- 
der their Families infamous. But if the Wif- 
dom of your Nation pafs this over as a Baga- 
telle J I fhall not trouble my felf about the mat- 
ter^ but give you fome Account of what I have 
dilcover'd in my Progrefs through the Hands 
of the Sharpers and Garaefters, both Gentle- 
hten and Ladies. 

iThere are feveral Clafles and Clans of thefe 
Verminjfrom the Court to the Mob; and thofc 
^ fo 

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itfl The GotDESr Stir. 

ib various, that to dwell on each would wc» 
opt niany Nights in my Difcourfc/ Therein 
ho Extravagance that a difteniper'd Fancy can 
form,that is fo madlv whimfical as a Qamin^- 
room about midnight, \t'here nothing is drf; 
covered of Reafon or rational Being ; . *tis a 
Bedldm^zn^e'ry one that lofes expreues a va* 
riouS kindof madnefs; which has madeoh6 
ibmetimes wonder at thevanity of Men inaf- 
lumingtdthenifelves the Preheminenceoftlit! 
reft of the Creation ; whilft his Conduft dit' 
covers more of Chaos ^ and lefs of Defign, thari 
the moft Senfual and Brutal part of the Afii- 
inal Kingdom* 

Thefe Game fins or Sharkers are a-kin to the 
Devil theirMafter^for they not only lye in writ 
for the Ruin of themfelves, but their 5^exf^/ 
the Sweetners^ and the defperate Inftruments 
that go about the World daily feeking whom 

* they can devour. Some frequent the Coffee- 
hoiifes of Note, and the Cnocolate-houfes ; 
others the Play-houfe, whe^e while the young 

: lieir comes to expofehis Shapes to bewiten 
the Lady's Eyes, and fteal away their innocent 
Hearts,the Setter gets into their acquaintance, 
and under the fliape of a profeffing Friend, 
gay Gallant,thoughtlefs Rake, grave Ad vifef, 
drunken Scx)undrel, or any other Appearai»ce 
he thinks moft likely to take with the young 
Gudgeon, wheedles him to a Bottle, and de- 
livers him over to the Executioners, the Siv^- 
nersy and the Sharpers ; who by peculiar Aits 
only known to themfelves and the DeviI,work 
the moft averfe'by degrees lip to Gamix^,and 

then 

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Agamjt Gaming* 15^ 

then Tiianage them as they think moft conduT 
cive to their own Advantage. The Setter all 
the while is cohcernM for his Friend, a Bubbki 
-to appearance like him, tho' ias foon as the 
Coatt is clear hfe jfhares the Spoil wi^h the bar- " 
baroius Rapparees. Yet as villainoufly fcanda- 
Jous as tliis Setting Trade is, I have known 
Agents, Envoys, and other weighty Negotiate 
tors raisM out of their Tribe, and many a 
Man of Quality has no morefcrupled the let- 
ting a Friend, than a Man of Mode pimpii^ 
for his Friend, or Cuckoldinr; him* Nay, 
^tis ilow grown fo common,that it's profeft a- 
mong the Gentlemen of the Town for as law-i 
. ful a Vocation, as any Corporation ^ and it i* 
.thought that a Miniftry may come to get thent 
incorporated into a Body Politic, and then I 
know not biit St. Jameses and C&vent-Garden 
. may entirely rival the CW^^ ;. ^Ad that therd 
inay be more Adventures z^White'^ sznA Brad^ 
burj% than to the Levant ^ or both the Indies. 

Tho' there be a thoufa nd Tricks in the Play 

^ betwixt Man and Man, yet that betwixt Mail 

. and Woman is ten times more hazardous. For ^ 

. the Man-Sharper endeavours to difguife thfe 

Cheat fo, as to dec^ve you into an Opinion^ 

that you have loft your Money on the Scjuare, 

but the .Woman-Sharper thinksyoy obligM in 

Cpmplaifance to overlook the moft clum fey 

of her Impofitions.. And to take notice of a 

Xady's cheating, is thought an unpardonable 

fiece of IB-breeding, ^is true, there are other 
-adies, who arekfsskill^din thefe Arts,that 
, wiUTk as great Bubbles as the Men,and when 

they, 

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I o» ±De VJ O X D E N iSfWT. 
they have play'd away all their ready-Money 
engage thdr Charms than in this Natipn ; thd* 
perhaps they have not made fo great a, noife' 
, elfewherc. Ifhall give you two or three In- 
ftance?,and fopiit an end to your AttentipDr" 
this Night. •, 

Xbe thul Bktfavcigdnii 

THE Lady- -7 has one Leg Ihoitei^ 
than the other, her Back overlooks her 
Head, and her Face is as formidable a^ iWl?^«. 
-^xu'sifhehas but one Eye, hte t\\t Cy clops yhnt 
that not in the middle, fpacious like die Gre- 
cian Shield, or Sun, but (mall as that of a Pig ; 
lier Nofe thin, high and crooked ; her Teeth 
f otten, her Mouth wide, her Lips thin ancf 
ItifF, her Breath contagious, her Neck long and[ 
lean,her Breafts flabby, her Arms,Hands,.aBd^ 
Fingers long and fcraggy, her Legs crdoked, 
and her Feet large. Her Mind is ndt furnifh'd 
with greater Beauties than her Body: Sh^ 
is Vain,Talkative, Loud and Silly. With all 
thefe Defefls fhe brought her Lord a great 
Fortune, but with it fuch a Spirit of Gaming,' 
that wotjliJ bring one ten times as great toi 
Conclufiob; 

Sometimes (he was a confiderable Winner,^ 
feldom rofe from tlie Table without carfjnng' 
ofFfome hundreds. But Fortune, th?t is ne- 
ver iixt, various as the Wind,and as uncertain, 
by degrees turned her Back to her, tiU fhe hacf 
now loft all that fhe had ever gaihM,to a handi- 
Ibm young Fellow that had beeil P^ge to ont 

' of 



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cllter Family ; and who being barn a Gender 
i^iajri,had apply'd himfelf to the moft honoiit 
raWe way of. raifing hinjfeif from Contempt^ 
hy getting a Cpmmjflion in the Guards, Thi$ 
brought him to Court, and ahandfom Affiir 
ranee tp the Baflet-Table, and to Piquet witli 
the Ladies^ . where meeting generally with 
good^luck, he at laft got Money enough to fe^ 

up for a profefs'd* Gamefter. My Lady ? 

happen'd to play with him one Night ; aii(| 
tho'fbe. had never till thejj found any motioa 
ia her Heart of Love, or any Defire but of 
Gain, yet by a certain Fatality, fhe wasjp 
fmitten jvita the Captain, that flie could iiot 
mind her play,but loft all het Money , and veh* 
tut'd,on upon. Tick* \ Which fbe furely paid 
iht next tinje fhe faw hirn^ and challenged 
him to a ir^IJi Encounter, jn which fhe was air 
• ways a double lofer, both of her Money and 
i»r;Affej9:ions;,yet bewitch'd with both th^ 
Love of him and olF Play, Hit ftifl renewM hef 
Folly as opportunity ferv'd. When Money 
could not be got at home, fhe would take up 
Jewels, Plate, or any other Goods, which 
•Jawning for ready-Money, fhe threw it away 
fti the fame nianner. 

, 'But nothing gave her hjoredifhirbarice thaA 
tjiat Hie fho'uld/lofeall this^ Mony to a MaA 
djat was yet ipfbnfible of her raflion,, and 
whom fhe could not tjsll l?ow to acquaint with 
her Folly, for fear it ftiould not prove fo agre^ 
* Afe to him a§ fbe could defire : She made aU 
}^ dumb Signs' imaginable, by ogling him 
Vitll hei* finfgle Peeperj bUt he finding nothing 
.• ... ' ' '^' M agired- 



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/ 



agreeable in her Countenance, feldom difo- 
bHg'd liis Satisfaaion fo much as to look at fo 
fhockingaPliiz. The difficulty of her Ambur 
heigliten'd her Defire more, but ftillwithas 
little hopes of Succefs, She at lad refoh^'eSto 
write to him, and to truft no Body with the 
Affair ; the next time they plaid, flie conveyM 
it into his Pocket with her own Hands, "Wnw 
the Captain came home and found fome oc- 
Cifioii tor Paptr, he found the Lady's Lettw, 
and feeing a Womails Hand, he foofi opened 
it with fomeeageriiefs, being both in ms Vi- 
gour, and a paffionate Admire* of the 8«/ 
No Body cart exprefs his fui-priz'e *when he 
found it fubfcribM by my Lady--- — ^ : He 
threw it afideat firft without reading, being 
fo difappointed in his Expeftation ; bik thiti- 
ing, perhapSjthat it might only be toborrd^^ 
Ibme Money of him,fince he had won fb fiietA 
of her of late, he took it up again, and tm 
in it thefe Words : 

I doubt riot but you'll he m much futfrwCd kfth^ rtd- 
in^ M I was confounded in the xoriting of tbk better* P^ 
litewife fenfbU of the Itsfrndenct of Uiting jf^u ktm 
bow much ntjl Hoffinefs and Mifery auft if your fff^i 
i^t nty Fortune is atwaiesfubjeU td yows^ Jjceuld ^^ 
pin ofyoufinte we flay'* A together j and^itfde^d^ / •^A. 
confepj I alwaies found lefs Defire to win ofyou^ thf»*^ 
sny-body lever^afd with ^ and t'Wifiiihatthe l^^^ 
luahle thing I have hfi t^'ytnt were my Atorrftythat Ifi^ 
not regret^ that would give im nofam^ hMtJhaoe^dtar 
Obtain) loft a Jev^elto ^oet^iibici iffouj»f,mtgff^^ 
Mough to refiore^ fmdefiin^dtp mJbrgfi oHtheSif^^ 
in Nature : My H^Mrtktho Right 9 f ^mother ^J^^^ 
have won it of me. ^r-^^Imn confomuUd and a^Bjm^^' 
darefiy no more-, fpane mjf Blitfies^ ^ligeme net i^ ^^' 



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'^^ Fai^ Extrivagant. i6^ 

\lfMi m felf myfmbev., but irnsgin tht refi, and you 
fflfjitidmt ■ ;. ■ Yours.«teriiaHy. 

The Captain liad fcarce Patience to read it 
ijyer. ajjd when hp, had,J{new not what courfe 
ix) take ; he was uowilUng to lofe tlie Advanr 
lagcoCwiniag her Money, and yet coujd not 
j^vaiion himfdftothinkofariy Affair with 
a Perfoqiib' forbidding as my Lady. At.lafirhe 
-reiblv'd to take n^ notice of the Letter;, as if 
J),e had. never met with it^nd to pafsthc time 
wifh her in thi^ufual manner, where being, ih 

f)iblicJhe,could ^r no plainer declaration of 
er Pjaftioii, tl^a . which nothing could be 
^nore ^rri^e to him. This wouldnot fecare 
iisvRepofey my Lady -^■■^ — when fhe faw him 
Hext,f«VcyM his Eyes and his Countenance, 
biit could make no difcov6ry, that could give 
lujr t^e leaft hopes bfSafisfaaion. She playd 
^^kh hira^gam^Jbft her Money once moj^fr; 
was ^'rey moment tortur'd witl>ft greater un: 
|afieae:$,^ and acagraaterbfshdw to inform 
#er feif whether he yet k;^w her Cc^itien, 
4ndif dotyhow to makc^Mmmorefenfibledif 
k. At lafr^ rofe from, the Table — Sari 
ijkvdfhe) »» Woman was ever jo unl^c^jy Pit 
^^j with you w more-^ TjbaUhe ruined if J go. m-^ 
tit made her a Bpw, ap^' withdrew, witlwojj;- 

tyingpoje^-word.. This wa$ fo mortifying a 
^ht tober, thatiJbe was^almioft diftra^ed be- 
twixt Defire and Deipair, tiU comii% h4me, 
Ab WW vdhA^A to< fenid him another Lett^, 
^bui'by fiich handsj-asthae ^ fhould befufeof 
tt9 coming td him: -She went therefore td her 
Scnftoie, and having 'Wrote and feafd^up her 

M 2 Biljet, 

% ■ Digitized by VjOOQIC 



164. 71?^ Go LD EN Spy. 

Billet^ gave it to her Servant-maid, and bki 
her be lure to give it to the Captain, and bring 
heranAnfwer. 

TheCaptain, ashis illFateordain'dit, was 
at liome, and receiving the Billet from his 
Man, who told him theMeffehger ftaicf for aA 
Anlwer, was obligM to open it, that he might 
not be fo rude as to put an Affront dn a I^dy 
of her Quality who fent it: He expcfted no^ 
thing but the naufeous Subjeft ^of the fbrmw, 
but opening it, found the followiflg Words. ' 

Is it fofjtke^thatyou could have a Lemrfidm me^anji 

take no notice of the receipt ? What Injury lifove I dorip 

you^ that you u/e me fo karvarofifly ? Butperhofs you did 

not under fiand me^ l^astMo chjfure for you tti come 

iny meaning. Jih ! noy barbarous Man I you top mil Uf^ 

drrflopdmy meaning \ you too well Inewymr fwn V^tt-^ 

^^nd therefore deal withrHe Info cruel a vtanner \ymj^M 

'Ilov*dyou^ and thetdfore pu*ungener^^^ 

tne with a Silence far more odious than (he mofi nnlind 

letter could ei/er havifr^^d. ' Atufi I refeat,my own ti- 

fan^ f Mvftlttllyou. dgdUth^ I love you ? What mufi 

JdoT Inform me^ infmfibkt^Creature ! let.fm hnri^ iphsit 

you'lipoyld have me (U to convince you. of wyLovpy soul 

gainyour^. ^Tjs trve-, lam not Miftrefsoffu^ Charwss, 

as are able to fenetrdte^'your cold MarbUM^art ^ abts/ 

^fajirfen/tklc of my own J^efe3rs'j yet certainly Love is a 

Merit that e^ry one can^i. pretend to : Nor do I think nty 

jitffo verydtjjncahlei but that I triight txpe^ a Return 

to my PaponL Confider your f elf ^ and tonfider mc^ ihfpf 

i'J^Mot devoir. '/■. . . > ■ 

, . The Captain was more coo&unded thaa if 
acBorab had fain inoor his Chatrlber^ tjnd was 
asrmuch to feekia hk Reply to this Itoiiw of 
Love, as he had beta informeridays to aniwer 
?iQ impovtunacerDuna for Moiiey: ^Heioieilr 

I ; jv. ' t;he 

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the Nature of flighted Women, and was lenfi- 
Me that a Woman of her cbndkidrt was gene- * 
rally more affefted with i thing of that natin;e 
than a Woman of Beauty. He therefore,^ a jfcfef 
A little confideration, refolv'd to reiiurn her' 
this Anfwer: \ //.J 

Tour BUUryAfydam-^ has doubly furfri^d me \ firftj 
hyyour avcujmg me of a Letter fipm your Ladjjiiips.fair , 
Hand J which I never yet Jaw i and mxt^ with letting mi \ 
know of the Honour you do me-y in having more favour ahU 
Ihoughfs ofnie thm ever I could merit. I mufi corffefsy \ 
Madarn^ if I could be fo^ain as to thiriiyou mean any 
^hi^g y^f ^ Banter by this^ I would tell you j that I have 
nvf forgot the Honour I have had of being in your fyn^ily 
in my Childhood ^ nor fhould I ever frejume to entertain 

'~ ' ' " - ••> - . -j^^^j^ ^ 




jtgn^ tp 
fe your 

ikidijhip wilt not purfut atrial of his Honefiy who has no- 
thing elfe to vali{jt himfelfUfofj^' Afadam^ I love you too ' 
wei (that is^ I pay too 0a^ul4f'^^^erution to your Qudl- 
tyMnd Merit) never t^ttfteftain nTtiovght injurious to^ 
€fth^r^' bfft jha^ alwainj be proud td, flhfcribe myftlfy 
^Madam^ '* ' - ^-^ Yourfaithfal ValTal. ' 

^ Tho' this Anfwer might have given my 
Lady -^-^ — - luJBicicnt reafon to. believe that 
fliewas far from t©uchihg hi? Heart, or tliat 
ihe could never exped to arrive at that Hjp- 
pinefs which fliehop'd, in his Arms, yet flic 
could not help fending him, another Billet^ to 
this purpofc : 

Xou affeSk (my dfar Captain) an Ignorance you never 
cmhegmlty of\ my Works are too plain to need arly Con}— 
t^i : fiufy to remove at Doubts^ I dfureyou iHat {was 
fineere^ wrote what I memt^ and^ deftgiid no Trial but 
tha^ofyour L/eve. If I am to be happy in that^ let m? 
htwiti if lam^toperifhitiDefpdit^'let me know it : 
. • M 3 ' Ai?/ 



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<k. ^^ ^^ 



Keefme net irfVaubh ^^^ warfffiate of Hope and Dijk^^: ^ 
f cannot live without youy mayo% have no reafontofrii^' 
fer airy Nctims to my SatUfaUion. Ifyotu bow any Oiliy • > 
gatiops to the Family ^ difcharge Viw in loving me^ Ix^.. 
am the bejl of it^ and add not Ingratitude to Infinfibi". 
tity. Save my Blujhesy and put not on me fo intf refer 4 ^ 
Task as ufurpngjour Part* 

The poor Cfaptain was puzzrd \yhat to an-! 
fwer ; yet, after lome ftudy, he fent her a Let- 
ter in Terms as ambiguous as poflible, neithec; 
to cut off, nor top much heigh^n her Hope. 

^he Maid which my Lady us'd to fend 

was a very pretty frefli-colourM Country Girl, ' \ 
tfnd who had Charms enough to give the Cap- 
tain Defires, which he prefs^d every time flie 
came to bring a Letter from her Lady, at lal^'' 
t6 that degree of rudenefs* thatfhe had great 
difficulty of eff aping with her Virginity-; % 
tha,t when her Lady would have fent her agajn^. : 
jlie plainly refusM to go, and on an Enquiry ?, 
difcoverM her Reafon. My Lady was lteaftil|: . 
mortified at the Story, finding that whlkih^ ' 
figh'd in vain for the Pfeafiire,* h?r M^jd had it'; * 
prd^'donher farther than fli^^pj^^^ but^ / 
unable to refift the impe^uofitj^ of^her DefireSj^'^ 
jThe bij3 her Maid make an 'Appointment with 
hini in the dark the nexf EVerii^g", who fcru- . 
pling to' Goihpty'with ^icr Lady^s Coinraands^ . 
fiieairur'd lier that ^ffie woiilij viehture to eiiT/ 
gage him in her^ftead. ,1 ;- 

' Theyi[ppoihtfqe 
Lover Came toth( Y 

much to tile Lady.'j ^^^ 

felf like a Man of '-,', 

a^ weary) gave 



d by google 



The Find Extravagatit. i6j 

^ Lord, who had long taken a liking to this 
Gir^ ^pofing his Lady was faft afleep in her 
cr^nBed, ftole up in his Night-gown to the 
Maid's Chanrfjcr, to ftirprize her in Bed, and 
fou once come to a Poffeflion, witliout the 
troublefoine Fatigue of the impertinent Ap- 
wiaches to a Chamber-maid ; Co tlirowing off 
his Ni^t-gown, happen'd to get into Bed on 
the Lady's fide, and finding her afleep, made 
no fcrupleto aWake her in the moft agreeable 

manner ; My Lady little thinking that 

Ihe' had her own dear Husband in her Arms, 
awaking in Loves Tranfport, cry'd a little too 
loud, Mj dear Citptaifty what mil you kill me with 
tleafure^ My Lord was loon fenfible whom 
he nad poffeft, and puzzl'd at her wcr Js, iiri' 
gili'd fomething more in the matter ; fo quit- 
ting the Bed, he concluded the Maid and her 
Mijftrefs had chang'd Beds on purpofeto abufe 
Him doubly; and therefore dealing doM'n 
Stairs, he takes his Candle and Sword with 
him to his Lady's Bed-Chamber, where, ro 
confirm his Sufpicioa, he found >if%4/7afletp, 
and his Valet de Chambrc clofe by her. The 
Bed-Cloaths were all off, and Ihe was naked, 
with nothing conceaPd but part of her Brealt, 
over which the Valet Tia4 thrown his Arms. 
The fight was fo temptinff,that tho' my Lord 
knew whom he was to foUow,hc could not re-^ 
folvc to oafs without fome Satisfadion in her 
Armsjwhich he thought now doubly his due 
on demand. He therefore gently pricking the 
Valet with the point of his Sword,made him 
W from his Trance, who found his Lord 
' M 4 arm*d^ 

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x68 Ihe (joLDENbpY. 

artaM/ashefcar'd, to his Ruin. My L6rf^ 
cry M out the Wretch, indeed it is not myLa4' 
dy, it is Mrs. Abigail^ whom. I have fecretly 
rharry'd, I beg therefore for my Life. 'My 
Lord bid him not makea noife^ and tho^ he 
wa$ fatisfyM his. pretence of Marriage was all 
a! common Refuge on * foch occafion, yet if he 
would, filently away, and get two or three of 
liis Fdlow-Seivants t6gether,ready to go with 
him, he would ^andon the Infdence he had d& 
fcr'd to his Lady's Bed. Now Mrs. AhigAtl lay 
all this while in a terrible Agony ,having caught 
thei Sheet and thrown over her, to hide what 
had already been feen. The Valet being gone, 
my Lord fliut the Door, and coming to the 
Bed-fide^^told Mrs. i^^/^4/7 plainly , that flleha4 
h^tn in a Confederacy with the Lady toabufe 
hiiii in the Arms of Another; that tho' he opght 
in reafon totake away her Life for fuch aTrei^ 
ohery, yet fhe haddifcover'd fuch Charms,* 
that by an immediate Compliance Ihe migtei 
make her own Peace, With tliat my Lord fet-f 
tipg down the Candle, throwing oit his Night* * 
pysin and afide the i^e^t,feiz'd the trembling 
Jingait^ wJio wks? pleas'd that any thing a)uki 
appeafe lier Lord when fo juftly provok'd, Sh» 
told him aU tijathad {Jafs'd betwixt her Lady 
and tlic Gapiain, and how he imagin'd- that 
he Imd her, npt my Lady, in his Arms. 

My Lord hayifig fatisfy'd hioifelf for t^t 
time, called up* his Servants,, and went^W^^^ 
Lights to fee for his Prig, not 4oi|bting M 
he fhould find them as he left them, ^ ^utjtbe 
M^Y an4 the Captain Ii^viflgponi* lo an :un- 
V • ^ ^ 4?rftanc|in^ 

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(^Handing after his departure^ the Gentle- 
ipan was gone, and the Lady with him. The 
Hpiife is fearchM all oyer, but no Body to b$ 
fotind, till they faw the SaQi in the JParlodrT .^ 
Window not fliut clofe , and concluded , 
thatthfey had made dwiy JSfcipe that vf^. 
Sounding aU tp Bed, he took Mrs, AbigAit to 
h^sown, vowing, tliatiffhe.had no more to* 
dp with his Val^t, and proved conjiant to him, 
lie would tak€ care of hera^long as fhelitt'tf* . 
./The Morning came on, and a Letter was^-. 
brought him from his Lady, to owp Iwr jFQljy,.^ 
^ekcule her Gallant, and let him know, tlijit in r 
majking her Efcape, fhe had in the dark Mn in^ ;. 
to a Cellar- Window of a new Building, that,- 
hi^d been carelefly left open by thie Workmen yj 
tl^t ibc d^fir-d to dye at borne, fince ihe coij[r4 .^ 
iiot, out-live the Bruife and the breaking cJ^ 
hj/a Ribl?.s^ And icgrci? one who knew ot hfr , 
l^olly )vould find it their Jntereft to divuJgieity., 
itw^s his Int^reft to conc^l l^s Diflionour.* 
f^oq[ig.|l the World, fmcelhehad metwith^lo^j 
jaft a Punifhment for her fault from the Hands 
oJt Providence. ^ My Lord ;CoofijcIeriog.the;. 
i^iatter, and that he was not wliolly inacwiefit 
in the ^d venture, but chiefly that ^s this was 
not knowni:b the Town, fo if deUver'd hini 
ftom a Woman t;hat was his Averfion, he ipi- ' 
mediately took care to have her brought homc^ 
Vhere languiftiing a few days, Jhe dy'd,and 
w^shonourabiy buried, leaving ap. Example 
of tlie ill Effeds of Gaming which ca^is'd all 
this TrOHble, ^nd her Death at \2l% 



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But it is not the Court only that labour? 
wider the Inconveniencies of this hateful Vice, 
the City Beanx eadeavour to imitate in this as 
indUoth^r Fojlies. 

TIjc Beautifid Bait devouf^d at lafi, 

TIere was an old Gentleman liy'd in the 
City, who formerly had a tolerable Forr 
tanCjtwit in hi$01d-age had nothing to depend 
pnbutaPlaceof aboutijo/./'fr J/?»aw. He 
jhfld^ Wife, a very beautiftd Daughter juft ripe 
jfor Man, and a Son capable of fucceeding him 
in his Poft, with two little Children about ten 
, Years old. The Family was large to maintain 
put of an Income. lb fmall, but by extraordina- 
it;^ OecoAomy they manag'd it fowell, that 
they,inade a very genteel Appearance. It was 
- the Dauighter*s' good or ill Fortune to haVe a. 
young Attorney .fall in LOve with her, and her . 
Parents having no Money to give her, expeS* ' 
!edrio,betteir0pj)orcunityc^ difpofing ot her 
hpncrtlyj. Married they were, and cqntinue(| 
a wf»le in the City, but Bufmefs not coming in 
4? the limb of the Law expefted, or in hopes 
thatfatthe other end of the Town his wife 
nilght get fuchPraftice by her Beauty as might 
bring in enough to fuppprt him like a Gentle^ 
inan, without the Fatigue of an Attorney ; he 
tites a Lodging in tl\e 5/rW, that being fo 
great a Thorowfare, might fufficieiitly fheVT 
per to all the Gallants as they pafs'd by in theirif^ 
Coaches. It being therefore a confide'rabk 
Shop of Trade where they lodg'd, Madam W 

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perpetually ia the Shop/whichinyked not a 
few Cufiomers to faer Landlady, and Addre(^- 
ks to her felf. t^etf as Fate would have it, 
iodg'd but at next Door, and it beiojg at thd 
very junfiture thit he was inpurfuit ofjuft {vx^ 
a Beauty to carry oh his Traide, he bleft his 
Heart at the fight, and made his W^e foon ea- 
ter into aftrictFriendfljip wi|hher; theHof*. 
band and (he is invited to Diniier, and then to( 
Supper, and no Day could pais but Sjlvi4(iae*. 
fo we'll call hcr> muft be their Gucft. 

The Husband lik'd this Treatment mighty^t 
well, but Money as well as Food was tvhat he' 
aim'd at. JJtj/ter (boA found oot his Wancs,axid/ 
ilipt>fied him on Bond with what he had occa. 
fipn for ; and having thu^ got hifln into his. . 
Po^yer, he was refolvM to make \ife of the Ad« 
• vaaiage. Svhenever his Wife was abc with 
theni, he pi^efsM for his Mon^, ^nd mana^'d 
the I^usband fb ardliUy, that t^egocfhe enoie 
(jif^itionofSy/a/MtohimfeE Nature nawr- 
fram*d any Creature more charmii^, and flw 
(lad'hefides fit>m her Education oointradcd a v 
ibrt bfBafhfiilneiSj^which heightenM her BeaiK 
ty to the laft degreb of Perfeaioii. Lsi/ttr took- 
(are to invite thbfe to his Table who had not 
only; Money enoi^h tO gratifie hisThirft of 
6aiA, butalfo Youth enough to be fir'd by a 
keauty lb uncommon, 

" The firft he cauglit was a young Country 
Squirt, who had not only a pl^itifiil Efbtein 
LaDd,'but a Biink of Money fuffident to pay 
^-his Follies. Sjfivia was uught to pr(^fe 
Vlt9f^ ibon as tli^ Diihes wei^e'remav'd, and 
i ,- - . . ■'* the ■ 

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UjT, ".-j-va v^ t» 1* X» B N OP YVV' 

the Bubble paid tod great a Deference to te? 
Eyes to contropl jier'Commands : His Eyes 
yere too much imploy'd on thofe of the charm- 
ing SyhU to mind his Game, and (b by confe- 
Suence was gttU'd .with all the eafe imajginable. 
tt.the Intervals he ventured to tell hisPaffion 
to. Sjhidy who only blufli'd at what he feid, 
not daring to encourage his Addreflcs. Th* 
youQ^ Gentleman try'd all m6ans to engage 
henwithput efFeSt, Lajter or his Wife alwaies 
taking carq to allow him litiJe Opportunity to 
n^afce any ^ogreft in.his Amour, He had now 
loft near aThoufand Pounds in thisProjeft, 
xfithout fo muchiis gaining a Kifs ; till weary 
of- this Courtlhip, he began to find fhe wa^ thg 
Gahiefter's Pirop^-ty, and therefore refolv'd' to 
a^yto hunand his Wife, with;the Proffer of 
Two hundEfdGuiueas for their Afliftance,lMtt 
thfflr. neceiv'd.sttie ;PropQrition,M^ith the higdeft 
Tnffigoatiott, : : whigh hfi4 propeeded toa Chal- 
lenge from the Sharper, but tW he fpund tl^p. 
wQUng Gegriemanwas not. to be 3ully*d : But 
b£ 69nfaku^@SQe Friends,\^ho Iqiew th^ Pun | 
bcttef.tbari&nfelf, thdUgltf &t,tO fit down by. 
tlieijpf$,«jiikJ jBSwer <ioine-r> W 'em any mor^ 

xhnyter noiv/tike.s her to ^/p;»: witli his pw.ii, 
5a(ly,the SeafofliQpming qo for .that pWce, <^nd,. 
there appcaringion the Wells, the, Fun drw.S 
thoufand Admirers, wjio daily, thropg'd to 
Li^er'i Apartment, and loft their Money to 
him, for a fight ofthofe Charms they were 
neyer to. enjoy.. Among the reft th^rekapn^ 
tabeanoldCi|:izcn,.Who had gotten a gsieaii' 
^ealbf Money by a gxm djatl pJKi^ayery, ahd 

1 ; nbw 



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1 be iSeauinpiiiiKVt aewftra. 175 

flow blind Cufid was refolvM to be even with 
him for all the Rogueries of his Life ; for he 
wounded him fa deeply, that if half he'd been 
worth could have purchas'd her Embraces, hk 
fcirpe would have fcrupl'd it : But Layttr wa* 
liot ^Dr fuffering fo great a Ti*eafure, and a Pcr- 
fon: who brought him in daily fo confideraWe d 
Revenue from, Bubbles andFools,to be taken 
from him by. anyone Man's Money, moft of 
which would go into the I\)Cket of Sylvia- of 
her Husband. . So that the old Qtizen, tir^d 
with the Expence and fmall progrefs he had 
made, retir'd in time, having loft above 2000 
Pounds by this Folly, the moft expend vc of afl 
his Life, and which foon put an end'tO' it ; for 
pineing aw^yje'ry day^in a little time he weut 
to the MaflOT he had? fcrv'd ; and leaving no 
Will, good part of what he left was confimfd 
inj^w. _.; 

. It would beendlefe t6 teH all the BubWd 
that Ihe made, and to reckon aH the Money 
L^ter got by her in this manner, bothinQty 
and Country, frcnn Glercy and Laiety. Bm 
hel^ving made^ fevetal luccefsful Campari 
with her, itwa? her ill or good Fortune to 
Jpfe her Father, ^hofe Deatn Jeft her Mother 
a9<l prethrenjp the iitmoft,I>iftreft ; they had 
}nq Jiopes of Subfiftence, but by begging hi» 
.f^fl[ie rlace for the Son, wha with it mi^ 
]?i^iptain the. Family and raife 'his own .For^ 
^e^l^ymafryjingto fome advantage, whi*^ 
Jp^^ a' hanc^ojn young Fellow, / he ..had ^^ao 
^^Hf^todeffj^ri^^ if he gain'd;bytUiispbist 

to 



t' i » tc 



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174- i «f u 6 1 D E n a P Y. , 

to fupport him till a fit Opportunity oflfer'd to 
accomplilb his Wiihes. 

There was ofthis young Lady's Mother's 
Accpiaintance a Lady, who having liv'd;in 
Ibinc Reputation formerly in the City, out (rf 
9n odd Vagary being parted from her Huf*. 
Wnd, ietup for Intrigue at die Coiirt<«nd of 
die Town, where fte was fb good-natur'd, 
that if (he could not pteafe her Acquaifltaacc 
her fdf,ihe would very generoufty mpply that 
De&a Iw helping them to fome othw tBat 
ttxAd, Her Chara^er, I confefs, is fomething 
odd, forfltewasfo exaft a ProfefTor of Since- 
ftty, that out of a meet |»rinciple of that, flie 
y/v<mlA tdl her Husband when (he made mtd a 
Cojckold, and bythevcrvfame Principle^ let 
one Gallant know whoi ffibhadbeen otnigifig 
another. This LarfyhaViiigworkM her feu' 
Ipto an acquaintance with feyeral Mea ia 
Powpr, her Mocfaef thought the fitted* fetCoa 
l!0addte6 to on this extrior^inftry Bxig;eiM£ 
<^her Afiairs ; ttddag therefore her Diiugttt^ 
with her i« theCoadi, <£ame t<> her Lod^ii^> 
fekl before her her CoAditicm, and de(ir^d m 
AffiAance. The Prefencc of this young tstdf 
infptr'd ber with £t Reiblution c^ doing a doa- 
ble Senrice,atonce to help the Son tothe Vkce 
•ad the Daughter to a Gallant. She advi^'^ 
Iter againft I^f«r, as the Bante of her Repaei- 
tion, where (he was daily expose tothe vie^ 
lOfaD the wild Fellows ol the Town, withoi* 
raping any Advantage to her felf, while 1^ 

$er i^ade her only his Property to fiD bis V^' 

kets, 



d by Google 



i be Bemijtd ii a i t devour d. 1.75 

ets, and at laft to betray her fb^- a Sum, whcKf 
le could no longer get by his otiier way. 

The young Lady was pleas'd. with her Ad* 
rice, promiuiig to return iila day or two, to 
iknowthe Event of her N^otktion iii btJiolC 
of her Brother. The good friendly Lady. w«s 
not long before (lie lent fot a young Gentleinan 
of Quality and confiderable Poft in the Go 
vernment, as w£ll as Eftate in Land, who was 
Mafter of a great deal of Wit, and a Pedbit 
toerfeftly charming : She defcribes die beauti* 
fiilPetitionerfo warmly, that nothing tmtifae 
could come up to the Idea ihe had cai$'d : Hd 
ii infimtely charmed, promiies her Succefs,aiul 
defire$*to fee her at her Lodging, where he 
would^ bring her the Grant of ue flace ihe hsM 
ask*d. 

Lojiter in the meaa while was infbrm.M h^ 
what Ihtereft ihe work*d, and long*d to be 
acquainted f^ith a Man, whcHn ifm.cxmild 
draw in, might be worth twenty other Bub- 
tecs : So the filly young Creature fuflfec'd- Idm 
tbcome with her to tlie Anointment; wl^ch' 
lb difobligM the Minifler of Scace, tiuciioo 
tintogpafs*d. but general Words; andaili^i 
ter could do, was not fufficient tx) engage hua. 
in the leaftDifcourfe with him or Regard to 
. hhn, but taking his leave very aiwupdy, iefr 
'em an in Defpair. Madam took thc^ young 
lady afide, and told her, that ihe had marrM 
he^A&irs, byixringing^fajiQtorious aScpun- 
drel along with her ; and fo difmifs'd her with 
Tears in Epr Eyes for her Folly, for Ihe could 
not but. like the Man, and now found that all 
•^i * her 

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174 loeVJOJ.lJMN OPT. 

her Hopes of providing for .her Friends and 
her felf were difappointed by her abandon'd 
Acgiaintancc. 

Fally refolvM therefore to.tak^ the firft Opj 
portuhity of leaving him^ fhe foon ipet witli 

hat; for the young Lord hearing of 

her Beauty, went to play there, one Nighty 
and beingoutof Aweof the Scoundrel, made, 
hisfAddrefles to bright Sjhia^^nd fitting by 
her^ ^oald whifper her often. She Hk'dhiffl 
fo well, that fhe agreed to come to him th^ 
firft lucky rninute the could find to makebe^ 
Efcape ; fo the next Morning early fhe ggti 
from her Lodging, and fending for jpy 
Lord — ^, he immediately took case pf jmp^ 
difcharg'd her Lodging, and fent her IJufy 
band out of the reach of poor Layter^ fo;rtiat 
he was forc'd to fell to hispid way. ^ 

"'-'■'':' ^ . '' :f 

■ Here my Gri^/W4 made ajQ end; ^n^ Ni^)6 
being pretty far fpent, I turn'd my felf to.reft, 
but could not put the charming .Sj'/i//^ out ^(rf 
my Head ; yet I reap'd fo much benefit frpni 
wnat he had told me., that I refolv'd ever to 
hate and abhor thofe vile Caterpillars ca^'4 
Gsmefiers and^ Sharpers. ^ 



.rrrrJ 



Thi End of the. Third Nights EntertAtitmenf. ^ 

■■ \'t I \ I I 1.1 1.1 I i i\ \{ _ y 

THE 

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"T^ 



\i 



M«MHi«M«H«ii*H 




THE 

Fourth Ni^ts Entertainmptit^ 

OF 

LOVE INTRIGUES. 

S long as the lafi: Nights Entertain- 
ment had held, the Morning fhi- 
fling out with fo extraordinary a 
- Beauty, I got up betimes, and took, 
a walk into the Fields all alone to ruminate 
on what I had heard the Night before: I 
couM fcarce have believed that Mankind 
cou'd fo far degenerate, not into Brutes, but 
into Divels, as I had heard, but I remem- 
bred that Gold wou'd not Lye, and that a 
Metal lb Mercurial had means of feeing in 
Security, what I cou'd not experience but 
at my proper Expence. Lord, thought I 
to my felf, what ^ Myftery is not only 
Man, but the whole Creation 1 How Beauti- 
ful is all we behold, and yet how foon it 
fades and changes froiji all its Beauty with 
deformity and dijOTolution. The charming 
Face of Woman, when in the bloom, how 
many wonders does it difclofe^ how if 
A a warms 



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warms a:iid tofles the Blood into iltange 
Tcmpefts of Defire ; and yet a few years / 
wears off all that's pleafing, and leaves it a 
Shrivled, Beamlefs Face,fit only to move out 
Averfiori. The Mind of Man which dif^ 
covers fo many Wonders, and almoft frames 
Beings that'exift only in its Fancy ; that by 
its Reafoh meafures the Abifs, views all the 
Order of the Heavenjily. Bodies, and pafles 
all the Bounds of Nature, teven to the 
Throne of God, aad tcberedifplays lum ia 
his Majefty beyond the expreffion of words, 
yet in a lew years is fled with all its fine 
Notions we know not wliither, and fiaks 
in the Grave with*fuch wretches as I have, 
heard defcrib'd, who have not difery'd the 
name of Men. Sure this World is the very 
Dream of P4*ovidence^ which mufl: be all 
beautiful, but muft vanifti all Uke a Dreaia 
as if it bad never been. 

Again, Iiqw can our Philofoplieris anfw^ 
this vaft dilproportion of Human Minds? 
Here is one that foars on the wings of Rea- 
ibn to a pitch of Divinity ; and tliere one 
that never lifts itsFaculti^ above the wp- 
tiies of the Earth ; nay, is laid beneath 
fchem in the Bowels of the Earth, with thofe 
fetal Minerals which only engroft all its 
Thoughts. One moves by his wile Principles 
of Morality, another is fo far from regard- 
ing them that he cannot underftand them, 
or form any Notion, but what comes from 
bis moft perverted Self-Love: So tliat tlio? 



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khe F^rm of Men is alv^y^ che iam^ yd- 
^ tbatr Minds aire fo different « as if tl^eir 
Kind pas ,hr from M^ the f»m«<. Tlui 
^» nie ia iiuifd <»f ti)at V4r{e t v 

M4« 4^^ ^v*^ /^^^ ^"^ thMM^f^Jik 

thc^A^^ng.and to divert my felt^und out 
i^ Friend; to Dtnei^ich whom I had not feeii 
a pf^ ^hitei He ^^ glad to fee me« and 
J CO i^^faim ytt m the; Land of the living* 
having bieard of his lUnefs ^ piretty while 
fines i aor had. he & &r efoi^'d his Diftem^ 
fer^ but that tht pak Tracks yet remain'di 
Being &t at Dinnct, I examinM into his 
Heakhj ^'fa^t had be^ his Diftemper} and^ 
how long he had laboured under an lUnefit 
that had leit him fo unlike wbftt h^ had 
be*5n ? My f rie^, JtM hy my Diftemper 
Jb^ been tfa» juft pumlhcaent of my owa 
FoUy 'f if I had had but your Prudence^ £ 
had yet been as well as you both in Furf^ 
aid in Perfbn : I have been weakned in both 
by A^rarice and Luft ; the Sharpers have 
Jr0bb*d me of my Money, and the Whores 
(^ my Health: And I am icarce yet re-^ 
coverjd ffom a Diiismper which I ow'd td 
their filthy Embracesi Take Warning by 
mfi) quit this Lewd Town, which contdin^ 
n<^og worthy the Bjefidence of a Man of 
true fenie : the Men are Sharpers^ the Wo^ 

A a a liied 



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men AVhores ; Rcligiori b Hypocrifiei i 
Frieadfhrp Defign ; Knavery thrives, Jloi- 
riefty ftafves ; Fools pafs for Wits, and Men 
of Senfe are eontertitfd aiifli in Raggs. Arti 
have no Patrons, Sharpers and wlhipres find 
dhly Regard : Poetafters get Places ; true 
Poets fcarce a Dinner. I am refolvM the 
next Week to give it my perpetual Adieu. 

I {taiVd. at the 'ftrangealteratifinr in rny 
Friend^ who had been a' fong tittle lb be- 
witchM with -the TowUj that he declar'd^ 
That the midnight Ordure Was a greater 
Perfume than the Primrofe in hb' Country. 
This Difcourfe with lAy Friend, piit me in 
mind to enquire of ray Gold ibmething 
on this Subjc£t, foon is* the Night return** 
me to my Ghamber : This defire did not 
foffer me toftay late abroad^ and no Friend 
fo dear, orBbttie fo^charnling, asco have 
flower to make me ftay pafl: Ten out of my 
Lodging. Every Boay w^nder'd at the 
change, arid gheft all Caufes but the reab 
One fwore I was fecretly Married, and that 
the Joys of the firft Month were not vet 
grown dull on my Hands; others lefs cha* 
citable wouM have it a little Harlot not yet 
grown ft^letome. . While lictle cou'd they 
imagine the ' ftrahge Converfation, that 
Charm'd mfe, well knowing my Temper, 
that I was n(^Mifer,*that took a plealure 
with brooding over my Goldiu' the Night. 

When I was come home, I foon difpatcb^d 
my Servant, and getting into Bed I turn'd 

to 



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OJ LoVErllf'TR I aUES. J49 

;^m^Gol(J, d.nd<J^firM to know what diG 
coveries they had made afliong the Ladies, 
wh6 were kind to their Gallants ? The Ro^ 
u»4» Crown taking thfl Priviledge. I Jhad 
given him, made me this Reply : ' 
' Tho' perhaps you may think wehave but 
few Intrigues betwixt the Gentlemen ancJL 
JLadi^; whiereCarrdinals, teach aootherfort , 
erf DoQ:i:inc in Lov?, and have niorp Ganj^ 
mdes than Phrynes^ yet 1 muft tell you that 
Romeis not without more natural Intrigues ; 
^nd fherc ar§ gallants who will, venture 
their Lives in the purfuit of a Man's Wife ; 
and Ladies that will hazard more than their 
Reputation to gratify thejHjfelves in a Lover: 
N2^y, who, rather tl|a.n deny tlick Inclinar 
tions, will ask the Man fhe likes to do her 
a civil Favour ; and punifli the. ncgleft with' 
the point of a Bravoes Dagger* 1 cannot 
hf there is oyer much Lovb on the Ladies 
fide, whofe general Confinement, and the 
common Negled of their Husbands, with 
an idle, lazy Life, fill them with fo much 
Luft, that they feek the Eafe of that, ra* 
ther than the more refinM Joys of a tender 
Converfation, which i§ {pent more m Aftion 
than pifcourfe. 

I know tliis Eleafure of IntriguQing oc 
Whoring, lies under an ill name with the 
Religious; but yet* I can't imagine why^ 
fince Nature has given fuch Defires,' which 
^annot be appeaS'd without difcharging in 
the 4.ri95 of Man or Woman ; and fince (a 
Aa 3j ^ W5f 

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i(Jd 5n^f Golden Spy^ - 
inany holy Men have givch fuch ExAmi)l«^ 
{IS give a fuffici^t Sandi<Hi to Whoring* 
^0ncuii*tes and Wives were allowCKi the Fa<. 
imschs \ and Dsvidthc beft^ aad Salomon 
{he wif^f^ of the Kings of Ifraily had botI| 
^ y0y Jcrfly company of Prab$, witlwui: 
^y i0pui^tiQn ot Guilt on that Account, 
j(iii if the g^ieral praftic? ctf Mankind in 
pup days be of any Force, there Is nothing 
pf greater Authqrity; apd it-is ftra|ige,that 
Pratlioe, which i^ the Kyi* of Ftudcnce, 
j^iOH'd h? fo erroneous in other parts o| 
Iviorality. | cpnfeS that there are niany 
lUCQuv^iQi^es, and hazards, that attena 
ihis ift the Wfirai Climates^ where Jeatoui 
i^e bears <uch an pnhoimd^ fway j yet tM 
Ifleafiire has beoa always thought Hrfficient 
$9 S^l^ng^ gll th^Confiderations. 

Fortunate Adultery, 



I 



l^as once pari of the Iting which a 
^^ y{)i»ng Gallant of Rome Wore CP l«s 
PingerJ* who had been a ^nighty Devote to 
rJeafu^ ?ind yet was; in the purfuitof an 
Intrigue Which he hiad iiaanag'd with * 
great dqaft^' Pains and Induftry. The 
??it^QS Pmfhili^^ was a Man fomething in 
jm^ ^ il^t yer^ ind^l0<i6t to hi$ ^i^, 



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The FORTUNATE Adultery. i6i 
as far £is confiftfed \*^ith the Cuftoin of the 
Ctmntrry, for flic had. ah entire afcendant 
over hith,^tfeihg Very yoiin^, arid very 
haiidfdth; biit jfhe was of top. Amorous 4 
Nittire to be lati«fied with the Fondnefe, 
■ ilhd Embraces of art <ild Man. *Tis ttue, 
flic Was not dif^uftcd at theJOotageof her 
Husband t)h hfer Gharmsi bccaule that gave 
\itt the means of impofiiig oil him td thjt 
advantage of her own Plcalure; Sigismu'nda 
Fidelfi my Matter; was the liicky Min who 
had the good forttunfe to pleafe her, and who 
had-hivet' mtet with any ill Eveht in all hi$ 
Afiidtirs with ^ler^ either, itr Cduntry bf 
Tchvri. As fhe firft fat* fiiml it ild^#, fo that 
tkas the firft time of thei^Lbves; bat PafH- 
fhitibf for his Health; m*d all the fine Seaibti 
to live near Frifutii Mthithcr iri the Moori- 
Ught ::Niglits FUeli ufed io refor^, and b(i 
idmiltecf by hfer Cofifid6nt^ 'fhe manner wa^ 
pHS :' Wheaih^tiih^bf h?s coming was fiktj 
a Key tp tlje Backrdbdr was left under i. 
certain Stonie at lome diftancc frdm the Pa- 
lace ; and he left Rome generally time endugh 
td get thithci- by Ni^ht. But one day he 
went fo^nfcr tQ^ H«hi, afrd divert himif&lf in 
the Country { bat b^iig fatigu'd with the 
Sport, and the Heat t^fthe day, he ivari- 
der'd intp a Wood.^ Where paffiftg thrpugh 
many.glooiiiy wiridings aridtirrnings of the 
Porcft, he came at wft Into a _^iace fp dc- 
litious, that had JfoU e'er fccnt it, he wbu'd 
jiave chang'd for it his old Seat qf Parnajfui', 
A a 4 ^ There 



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i^t x^p Golden Spyi^ 

There was a lovely Thicket, wJiofe lofty 
Trees and thick Leaves, caft a brown fha* 
dow all around, which fervVl fot an iagree- 
able fhelter to a clear liviiMj Fountain, 
whofe traaiparent Streams warbled o'er thf 
Pebles, againft the torching Beams of the 
Sun; which yet penetrating the Boughs 
]here and there, produced variety of fw^et 
Flowers, which EnamelM the verdant cot 
vering of the Place, while the wandering 
X$fhirs blew the Odoui-s all around ; the 
Roots of the Trees were covered with a 
filken Mofs, and their Branches filled with 
the pleafant Npt^ of the Nightingdes a|i4 
BUckbirds^ made a natural and moil de- 
lightful Harmony, which was mingled with 
t& foft wifpering of the Wind through the 
Trees, and the murmuring Waters that 

fow*d along beneath. Sitting down here 
eneath a Natural Arbor, we foon heard a 
young Gent;lcman Singing this Farw^ tQ ^ 



IOp^ 1 4 faoUjh Servitude did fravi 
^\ A yajfdl to intperioHS Love; 
u enough I fiot»,at t^fi am free 
from aU thy Painsy jfomi Love AndTbeej 
Xh Wild tumuUuom Tempejt now is o^ery ' 
J fear a Shipmeck now no more^ 
^^e on the f easeful Shoifrn > 

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II.- 

StftotitheBeAchfifmiletofeekkirv, 
l^e raging Billms V(^dr^ 
fret from the Blajts of Hope and, Fear, ' 
'And aUthe anxiettspocks, thatfiHy Lovers knowi 
Secure from thy Shaft s^ tkf Quiver an^'th^ Hc^' 
■ Whiisi my Liberrj maintain ' 
I never Jball comp/ain. 
Of Ijyvers painful 'JbySf ' and Pleajing Pain. 

To his Vcrfcs he added the melting Notes 
of hk warbl&ig Lute, which made fiich aii 
Harmony, that ha.dVlyfes the conttmncr of 
the Voiced <jf the' ^r^»j been here', and 
bound to the Maiii Maft of his Ship, he had 
bofft his Bands and come nearer to have 
heard this new ^rw« Sing. 

Having now tirM himfelf with Playing, 
Idid aiide his Lute, when eroding his L^s 
iind kaning with his Elbow on his Knee, 
With Tears he thus addrefs'd himfelf to 
Tietro. who fateclofe by hiiij. ' 



THE 



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j^4 ^ 0oi»£.» Spar; 

HISTORY 

Julio and S^rflproM^; 

Every Day I find a thoufend Misfefr 
tuaes furroimd me, but my Soul beht 
en Henour, cither fearf nothing, or at leaft 
}f it be any thing, it is Infamy* J, •fcatif 
not whether I owe my IncUnafebns . fe 
Amours , to the Vigour of my Conftit^ 
iion, or to my natural Temper ; yet ho* 
vigorous io ever t hare been in ihisj«?*jj, 
jmd howfearncft in the j^fait of thisjjeyj 
I loon,' iiay, prefently r^tent- of my J^i 
^nd now I perfectly rremb^&at the thoi^ 
pi an the falfe Blandilhrnents oi Lo\re. M 
fince you my Pietro defire me to give y« 
ah Account of my late intrigue, and tQ ri^ 
member mj Madne^. I Ihall n6t fcriiple tQ 
relate the ieverity of my Fate. 

I was oblig'd to go to Leghorn aboDt 
fomc Bufihefs of Importance ; while I was 
ihere it hapned at a publick Feftival,theWo- 
|nen of the Town appear'd aB bare fec'd at 
a Ceremony peculiar to the Saint of the Dayi 
they were afl fo beautiful, that tho' they 

• were notGodefles^ yet the Error had been 

...... , ..... ,., ^^^^^ 

■ " } 

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Of Jvitio tmd SnupfipTHiQ. ip^ 

^cufable for any one to have thought thcp^ 
<b. Beauty appear*a with all its Grace u^ 
nil, but f^mM yet more l6vely in one a- 
. inong them ; the LillieS iAhcraieek»\^ero 
lieighteri'd -vrith the Rofie porple of hec 
JElegant Bipod, thatdy'd thcna with a Blufh 
fy wai'fn, as to be able to fet the coldeft 
Heart on Fire, Her mod^ft Forehead Was 
diftinguiftiM with two fcijiitirck^of fliining 
Jet, fcparated from tach pthet by art agree- 
able and fnowy Interral-/ pn ^ach fide the 
0neft Nofe of the World fhone two brkht 
Eyes, with Rays more glorious tbah thofe of 
the Sun,and darted the Arrows of LPvfe iutoj 
the moft innocent and irOifen Beholders; : U^t 
flowing Hair that fell dijwn iftCufls, When? 
is'cry Kmglet was placM for a GRice»tantam'd 
an Ambulh for tho Liberty ol" Mankind} 
and the Riiddinefe of her l4psfeem*d to 
hav^ taken ib deep a dye, from tbeBlPoddf 
thofeHearts that had been broke for hct fake* 
Her Neck Was White $s the driven Snow, 
and without the hdp of Jewels iWeBingc^ 
iioiigh with its own native Charms. Be* 
neath rofe two heaving Breafts, • which 
breath'd nothing but Love, aud promifing 
Bxtafiesi to the mppyMan that Ihoi^M bead* 
mitted to prefs them j Ihe had a Shape exaft, 
. a cteirming jettiug in her Motion, that pro* 
mis'd an Agility tranijjortiflg ia tbeOardea 

The Liberty of the Ceremony admitted 
all to a nearer Converfation^ without either 
^fmcion or fqaadal« / 

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J tremhle muchy my Heart wp flames if^fpire] 
Ani gaze at her who fiiU augments wf Fire; 
I looky IwofuUry bat the more Igasc^e^ 
The more J Ui^uijhy and the more I blate, 

I felt too mijch Pain, I found too muclj 
pefire to fufFer me to lofe this opportunity 
of letting her know the mifdiid* thatliei; 
feycs had done me; J therefore approach 
her/ and ^dd refs to h)?j: in this m 

' Believe me^ Madam^ there is fg ffi^d^in 4 
^l^lame kindled in my Bofom^ that if you jbew 
me the Itafi negle^ it mil entirely cfj^jun^ mt* 
*But if you mil be fo generous to admit the 
tTears of a Stranger ^ J (mU mfike two ^eat Goii 
your Particular Friends j md that ^Love ^W 
Apollo. Tour Eyes hofve drawn the frjlfrm 
that Heaven where he has a Reign more abfo- 
lute than on Earthy that I might be deliver^ dm 
Ihimy and he tome reciprocalt^f. The other your 
"pace^ formed fo beautiful ^swou^d have rdis^i 
^he Envy of the three contending Goddeffes o^ 
Ji4ount Ida, has calPd from his Converf&tm^ 
pith the Mufesy to fing its fraife ; thsSjou 
might know J that fuch a Miracle of Beautl 
ought not to 'b? obfcur^dj and enjo/d by any one 
J^any fmce there is no Goody that U not common, 
to more\ and that Beauty is given^by the Gok. 
to be beloved by^ and to love many. 

...... ^^f^' 

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Caftyour brightEyes the Univerfe around. 
Nothing more glorious than theSun is foun^. 
Yet he his Warmth and Reams imparts tM^, 
His Commoit Light oa every one lets fall. 
GUdeon ye Floods, ye l?eauteous Floods^ 

glide.on, . 
Whtither youf couirfe yoB take through I 

* Jledsof Stone, ( 
And in delightful Cafcades tumble down ;, 
Or through the flow'xy Meads your Track' 

* you chufe. 

And to the Fields Fertility diffiile ; ,' ^ 
J^onp are debarrM of you th' eommpnVfe. 
A'ferviie Law.the Fair alone corifihes, . • 
Abhorrent of the End of Natures wife defighsi 
"Wfele yoifr Cafeflcs that to^ori^'.reftrains, . 
And only a poor, barren, lifelefe Joy obtains^ 
Be thou, my Fair, as ):he bright Sun divine. 
On all with fmiling Eyes ferenety fhine. 
Let no dull Husband,with his cold Ernbrac^' 
The fertile Joys of Lovers thus deface ; 
JJor, liketl]ie5«», thou wert by Heav*n de- 

fign'd, . ,. 

To be the Miftrefs of all Human kind. 

, Halving heard mjVerfesy m/h aSmileJhefaid 
to me* — Defpairnot, my Julio, for jou came Hof 
to this f lace without the Dire^ton of thy good 
fortune ; for Sempronia fnds her Heart ec^uaHy 
inclined to Julio, which has burnt Jo long with 
as ardent a Flame^ that her defire can^tbe lefsy 
than yours for mutual Happmefi. - 0oyou take 

^are. 



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tAre, like Agpci Soldier , to be PunSfukl oft i^i 
Waf^h to NtgiftVtVfitkArmifrof^ f^ the ^-xek 
tutiojt^ tmi Ijka&deferjmrj-Atisfdiionm hs^M 
«r ; XHiftfamtrif Httfe^ lexpjou Ate fincc'i 
fopjfy tkeN^h vitkQUt 4 Beii Jm I mthottx A 
Lover* ' / . . ,' . • 

As toon a3 ^ had (i(Hi4 ^eiikids il^ ^;bt«(» 
ker wi/, and I fonow'd hsr dote ^liro^ti 
the Tqwii till flie went intQa Magnificeal 
Palace,,. %h^ lookM it felf lik« a ^ly ; fii 
ttmt if i might judge of the infide by she out- 
iide, I cou'd. tiKpet^.aathing lefsci^iaa tbs 
<yolden Kilace ol" Nero. , 

The Sun. now very b^^tunely ii^^'a 
his Ccwpfejco his W.&ti:yli^d, and now thi 
Svening S'(aj.* began to ibine^ 91^, with a 
more r^afkting Light ; whicti 4:i}rdn3mei:« 
teib us is the Planet T^ ««j» Whm the hap- 
py ftia4«^ took PoffeflSon of the Hwni^hetc^ 
and the Door bdngopea'd, and a Wqokui 
iftandin^ In the Entiy with aConrqiousmji|]^ 
muring Voice, caU'dJWi*?, t ipadenamao* 
jier of Paufe^ but without any more add 
comoiitted my Self and nay Fortune to he«* 
Con'du£b j for Ldve drives Fear entirely out 
cf our Bofomsk Taking me by the Hand, 
and leading nie through abundance of Park 
Kooms and Turnin^of fo large a Houfe, at 
laft fbe brcHight me into a Roop that feen}*4 
the very fefeded Palace of Luxury, and 
lock'd the Door after us. Here a yaft nnnif 
ber of Tapers. Wliiter than Snow ^ead 
' ' round 



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found a borrow^ Dayjwhik Silyfr JgciLnch-t 
es fixMonthe SilkT^peftrjjfuppQrtecjth^iin, 
theCornifhes of the Room were Ivoify inlaid 
in Cy prefs. and Jatfpcr ; the Bjjd w*a^ hw^ 
with Furpte Curtains,; richly Enibroid^redl 
all over withGold, and theCoivit^rpai^ ^ 
ing adorn'd^il rotund with a Fringe of GqIc} 
fieachii^ down to the -Floor, which w^s in* 
laid witb Marble and other Stonesof various 
Colours^ exprefling tothe Life all maoneF of ; 
Beautifiil Flowefsin Mofaic Worfe* 

Then my Guide fet the Tabic to the Fire 
fide, ^nd cover'd it witb the fineft and 
moft curious Sweetmeats, aumpleatbg the 
Sanquet with handfbm Bowls, crown'd to 
the bdm with the fmiling Juios of thQ 
Richeft Grapes; and then in genjtteMur- 
mups Ihe infoim^d me who herMiilr^ yfm 
m thefe words.: 

It is now, /aid J^ Eight years Bnct Setfi* 
front A has been Married to Antonio^ a. M^ 
of very great Wealth, but of no lefe "E^liy 
and defeats of Perfon and Mi^d, Let all 
Young Ladies who meafure their Happiness 
by th^ heaps of theU* Wealth beware leaft 
in the crowd of their Admirers,. they re- 
gard in their Choice of a Husband, more 
the Splendor of Gold, than the Virtue,. Wit, 
and Vigour of tlieMan j for the jKwr Sem- 
fironU Ues in the midft of a heap of Gold, a 
Widow tho* a Wife, and knows not who 
fliall be Ifeir to all her Husbands Riches ; 
yet the ch^ Matron has fo great a.de0r9 

for 



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for Childten, that fhe leaves no m^ans un* 
tryM thit may furnifliher with an- Heir fo 
muchdefirM by both her and her Husband* 
Flattef not your ielf that you have, the Hap- 
j^inefs of being called to the Embi^aces of fo 
great a Lady, out of any Paffion tor any of 
your Perfonal PerfeSions ; when ever Ihe 
pretends toLove^ that pafFes for Words,not 
Truth ; fpeaking more to the Guft of the 
Ambitious Admirer, than by any real fenti- 
ments of hers ; for this Lady ot fuch Cbnt 
fiimmate Beauty, finds nothing that can 
inove her Lbve or Defire ; , for Ihe is hot 
more Beautiful than Modeft : For her Kifles 
' are free from Crime, dtnd flie is not guilty 
of Adultery in all the Enjoyments Ihe has 
beftowM ; for Adultery is the effed of Luft, 
not the Natural defire of Children. Two 
Days ago, while fhe offered up her fweet 
Prayers to the Holy Virgins mofl: Miracu- 
lous Image , which feemM to grant the 
Prayers ot its Votary, and deliver^ this O* 
i^acletoher: 

Thdt bj Tioung Jiilio jbe fhbu^d frove^ 
' Fertile JcySy and Pregnant Love. > ' 

Do not therefore wonder that you found 
fo eafie a Reception, fince the Holy Virgin's 
Image Commanded her to admit you to her 
Chalt Bed for the Propagation of Humane 
Kind. If we are not the only care of Hea van j 
yet certainly that has feme regard to our 

Happinefs, 



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Cy* J U L I O AHA SEMPRONIAt l6\ 

JHappincf^ and whatever is done Without 

the Approbation of that, is of no mannef 

of benefit to lis. Thus Antonio the firft Night 

<:& his Marfiage, which was to be fure ail^ 

agreeable to Heaven, dcftroyM the Fertility 

and Maidenhead of 4S^i^/>re?w>together; H6 

has Four Brothers who have taken his plajce, 

who while they keep Antonio from his BAi-jfen 

Bed, abufe his Sifter with unfruitful S6ed. 

MovM by their Impotence, fhe has callM 

the whole Family into herafliiiance ; but 

in {o vaft a number of Gallants, fhe has not 

yet met with one, who has been able to ftop 

the haftningRuin of To Ancient a Family. 

Whilft this Babler held on her difcourfe, 

Semfronia her fclf tript into the Room where 

we were, and the noife of the Doors open* 

ing rouzM the Maid, who had now almoft 

talked her felf afleep^ The burning Tapers 

at her entrance feemM to blaze with greater 

Flames, and the Eyes of this Mortal Nimph 

fcem'd to burn the very light themlelves. 

After fhe had excusM her long ftay by the 

Importunity of her Husband, and the 

Afl&irs of the Family —^ Lowers (faid fhe) 

fiek Darknefsmd Secrecy. Prefcntly the Doors 

were faftned, and all troublefome Lights 

put out, and the Bed all Pcrfum'dleft half 

Open ; fhe was pleas'd with the Maids Dilir 

gence and Adrels, whenfmiling, fhe threw 

her Arms about my Neck, and giving me 

Voluntary KilTcs that Relifh'd of PJeStar 

The Covert of this Bed, (faid ihe) is 

B b due 



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dfff Mfhf/acrfd ^igbff of Lovfj, 4»4 yatt ottghi 
tfi fommff fhofe CUms tb*t j/otijh^lf fifperiewit^ 
ig ti>4t nHfi to file/tee ; wi(h that £b§ ilram'd 
t(\^, cl^ie in a m&i'e Arid eoibFaxsQ, and fuck* 
\ag myhipi into hers, il^ iUr|>ris*<i m& 
^ith a Tremulous Summons to a clofer Eo- 
gagement, aiid in t\{e midft of Im eagerneis 
ihf«w her ikllinglxiver on the Bed* 

You have doubtlcfs my Friend Pietro, ex* 
peprienc'd thcTranfportsw Love, when you 
met v^ith mQr^tmnk equal Fire in the Fair 
one ; ihe gave proof ^ her S^tis&dicm ■ 
through all the Combat of. Love, till after 
many De§dsof Valour, botih tired, w;&j^l{ 
afleep^ The mu :Pay refr^lJiM my Vigour 
i^^ith gpod M^at #na riph Winery f^C^d l;ke 
Night, renew'4 our Flcafures ; till ^fter ft 
fi4onth of Pleafurie%'aad Jjove, I had the 
good Fortune 5ft confirm th^iQrade of the 
Holy Status by impregnjatiug the Charming 
^efff^offia. But npw Surfeited with fy long 
a Happinei^j I ^efired my Qifmifngn ; and 
Serff^mtAf either angry with my indiffe- 
rence. Of, a$ }. rather believe dcfirous (rf a 
aew Gallant, even beyond my Expedatipn 
yielded wilUtigly ,to my requeii, only ad- 
ding, this Adm<^AtiQn : 
■ . ..If'Jl^ffr si tars .( faid fhe ) ^iftoi^. tht -^ti^f 
JEav^rs they h^e bffidw'd onym* k^^ i/y4^. 
yff.Mmyi y^u kj^f fou^ a Friend Pfhp i^g 
in time re^ard,-the Pidelitj of your S/knc^^ with^ 
$t^e:fj>/£}ed^om>ur^ ht ifyonfitJeryo^rXfiii^ 
t/o dfvulge what has fA^ l^etvsisit us, affureyout 
\...n ' , / Jelf 



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J^ fi^ypiiirg4fi?nefi mfi ie PHmfifd with ax 
ntcfi Hrt^n dtt^tk^ Tm Moms of = Mi0f^r% 
W0n0in Mre^ lu^g^ ^ imflscsbliy as w^er ^bg^, 
ing m0y tiU ph^ defir^hn of ^e.Opnder^i 
4ni of nU Jj^juries ^ Woman mofi r^fenu, the^ 
Mfio^ewyt of her ^ivMe Fdvoufs. But that 
^m nti^ ^ think mf Threats <fnfy emftyPlfvrM^ 
bring hither Bombp^ that his deMtk tnayfuffi-^ 
tiemj^ ^i;>WWf^ Julip qf iphat he oi^ht^ to e^-, 
feB on the vidation ^ his Trufl. fortune hof 
hen very malicious againfi my Refutation^ ani 
Apomefiick of my own has beenfo hold m to cafjt 
4 Reflexion on my I^ame : For thif FeUprp whom, 
Mh4dt4ken/rt)m a Qroom^ prefer^ h^ i» the 
Ms^e^ n^f recekPJL hfm to this vefy ^e4i thaf, 
hy Lu:)(^y and Piej^ujTjes he might- forget the 
lownefs ^f his Conditiofl\ ha^betrafk n^ Fa?^ 
' njour^ani by a fernichns Loquacity made ^ un^ 
grateful Retpre^for all thf ObJigaJtionSythat I ha4 
laid ufon hinu The Ret ^dicus Ingratitude of 
the^Sex reaches even to ibeferviU l^ajfafs ; for 
pfhen^once you have fs^cie^tlygiutta^ your Af-^ 
jfetites with Pleafiire in our Arms y youlatigh at. 
yourMifkefsy an4 mth a haughty ^ride negled 
thofe JofSy which you ha4 before fbughf^ with fo 
m^^ny iVatchingSy ^/ghsj Tears and Faflings. 

Tovyraif^s tfhceiKi ^lieir Difcourte ^ombs 
"WaL^ fefQi^ht igi. bcftin^vl^^ Countenance 
an4 pyes confefs*d,Laciviau(hefs; I^ 
'^A^ l^\^c]f^y and h^s Chin bov^rM biit yet 
V5itJ!?i its firft Powjn, only a fweUing in his 
ire^ft aod ftclly defelrmM a very comly and 
^%¥tefMji P^lQn: Whom when the jylai^ 

3 b 2 had 



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i6^ ' The Gold eh Spy. 

Had tiedfaft to a Beam , fhe ftftnfed hi* 
eioathstifehind Wm^ and put a Si!<rcf Veffel 
tinder liis Feet, and therithruft theSvirord 
flie held in hef Hands up to the Hilt irico hb 
Bofom, whence iffued fuchaGuChof^ Blood as 
cdmoft fill^d'the'VefTelat once : Then taking 
out his Heart, opefning the Mouth of the 
Sufferer, who nmde no manner of Noife, 
gave the Heart to him to eat, adding to it 
this Intpretatioff — ^Thdt Allthcfiy who ever- 
fiiou^d rail at and defame the Lady he hddjen-^^ 
jofdy and went* d fctuplete He for thtKefuta*^ 
tion of^hisMifirefSy mighf dye the fame cruel 
death. . Cold almoft to death with Fear, I 
expefted immediately the fame Fate, and 
all I durft pray for was phly a miWer Death: 
For I knew that the Cruelty of Women,> 
fike that of the P^nther^ ftops not at any 
Mean; but <leVours Biore than will fill his 
Belly. When the cruel Semprcniay VktyA the 
fho re barbarous Abigail ^ bidding me re- 
member the Fatfe of Bdmhoy turn'd nieout 
of doors. : ' 

Being got out, I at laft began to rcfume 
new Courage, and with all the fpeed my 
Leggs wouM firrrtilh me with, I fled from 
an Abode more horrible than thc'Ifles of 
Circey and the Sirens ; and having found wit 
myQuahers-, I got into my Chamber; nor 
ftirM I oiit of Doors in three Days, nimi* 
bating all that while on what I had feen. O 
ye immortal Gods, cried I, how abandon^ 
are we- Men! - We -foolifhly buy Adultery 



at 



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«tthee3S{)cnct0Jf p^r Ljyes, OFiwhan is yet 
more grievous tjian .any dc^th,i>p^|)©tuil 
Bamlbment,HijMu.r*lier. <;omes,-.iBp(jR us,,i4 
the midft of our Joys, and that in. ?i 
manner fercifilet, that theCoBB^moji liang- 
man woj^d'.trcmfek at jhjj Exetstion. i Why 
«-ucl .WDmen b*v.e y<Hi thusi ,a wi*iij^ rer 
priev'id fflie^ whea I. was liaif:U'ay^($\^r-t]|fe 
.Sfygisnh^USf and reftQr*d m^ t0 ©:ifKini^ 
.tary Life, . oalyto put .$ifr fudd^nly t$ au«^ 
^meli^eath? Thisfis a talfe Kio^ne^.^iSiic^ 
you fhew.rae, 'which inftead.,ftf/9cgiving, 
jonly defer the Punjihment. Let m^ .die in 
Peace,and without any fartherrdislay reftoi^ 
this Viaim 19 guilty l^atc : Eop^tp /what 
purpofe.was I ijia£feWitn^s,^£\t^ Death 
of Bomhyhxxt that I might he c6hyincM,tl^ 
wiMn once a Woman will profftitute hefr 
Virtue in unlawful Embraces, th0.ti^ihe fct^ 
00 Bounds, to h£r Vices? He; had in his 
Power, not onljr a Voice, b]it Sighs anitf 
Groans in the midft of his I'ormeht, and 
utterM not one : And while his J31dod C^ufti'tJ 
out in fuch a Flood, taking no fioticfi, looks 
as if he were in a Lethargy^ pv W fomf 
drowfee Potaon given him to ma^e the Opcr 
ration the more teafibie. The Heart drag'd 
out of. Jiis Body by that audacious Jade the 
Adaid, ftem'd lefs , than a Kuman Heart. 
Ail things tp day bore the face erf' Impcb 
fture; but indeed we lay not afide our difr 
guife againft Heaveji it felf, fo.that if the 
pivii^ity had not a regard to Human Frailty, 
B a 3 , . 'Jupiter 



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i66 ' 7*ff GdloE'W S?t. 
JiiPktf hivliig thtewtt all Ms. IPtessdtfiw 
^itSyWOuM' have 'ftpdd'iA the ClOQills m m." 
dffcilfivtt :S^^a*or, «dt JPuniflier of nsflr 
Crimes.'. '' 

White tftsfe Thdiughts 01^ ttiy ^f^id, 1 
latztdi •foixid body kriock-at ^ Stooi*, Mirk^ 
to my eq«al Sar|*iie aud Winder, wha 
^ou*d have been lift'ning to ifty^CofliptaiHt 
-but B(»^ ia hisowa pro^rPeribn, whafev 
'<]:<gafth { ha4 been bewailing; not at afi 
Sldody, nor with aCweir-dBofonft, yet'wiik 
a more fearful Coiintenaiice> 4^a'n4i»3 >haid 
*tvheh *(e faMtr his Hfeart pUll'd out of his 
^Boibm; ^othrosw4ng himfdf oni JBsKaeds 
^'Bie, thus bdgan— W;6f«ry /i^ejf yau Sk^ 
40 rail :4t fo great -a Wtimm^ v^hiife Jngtt pht 
'mtry Sft4(rs ^he^lves afeftjtfihU «/ ; what tv& 
h4s beenfaUq 'M&di^faMs fi/ort^her dW-, 
for/be dk>es ijtt» the f«ry Tiiouglds-of Mm, Md 
fh\}^4t uJifimce ftom them^^ears their -dfim 
0ifeourfe: HViat you Jaw i0m t4> tne, iptti fer-- 
formed '»itht>tH^ the Jjtilfiitg of ^ ofwy mU 
^Bloody onfyf*firUie aTtrr our into pu, B0 
Htvert the Omen G<^Sy that- this Mimiic Death 
Pdu^d'he af^ fromjt of youuin. Rea.lity ;htt 
hiieve me J 4»d take jny faithful Adioidt^ fy 
i^hiifUcff mfh your utmofi ffeed, prhereycer^ 
tai/t Devi^^mfvoid^hly Attendsyou. 'N&f ami 
^ffo karifM^ua 4 Tii»*fery at to faffet a Motif 
pho has- hee»' admitted m the Bruitiov <^' the 
fanKfut tady mi^ Hhy fetfy toperip ^ m ««- 
•fimefy Tate : for -who kmfsiut the Jjuate Stant 
0hich brought Ue^^th^r^the fumt Ued^tnayJirii^ 
m koth to the f/^me Qr-AW, ^ •■ • , 1 



d by Google 



Ihe IfoitTaNATE Adultery. 167 

rtKitioft wtR almndahce of Tbaiiks, pr6iij'i- 
pftg that -Whtti ever it lay in my wayife 
JhouM thalkrigft as great i Service from irie: 
ib tikirtg hiy -Leave of him and JtegAorw, I 
iAad«? thei>«ft of my wafjto Ra?»e^: Where 
fef{ 'eai^t^pt^ the ftratfe Adventure oii^' 
my Uiad V btit retii^'to ' ifty Goagnii 




^rttory of it, I may never more think of 
ady"- jBior^'AniprpUs Engagements. 



vCi- .1.: 






u.!..l - 



iWiQ .havt9g givffii ^9 ^jcoomit to: his 
JBri^nd, / %B.d plaid u 3'iuie xu- tionjt oti 1^ 
s to cadmhis Mind ^^ich the RUhdM 
M rufflfid^ they went fheife ^ay, rand: icfii 
ay 'Maftqr to eacpcQ: the i proper Hour. 5* 
gStrtog into the Arms of thcAinotqus Pf^ittjt 
&S&, The N^ht now. coming iqn^ an^ ^^ 
Moon rifing?' he got ^p and went. t6> the 
Stone, where he fo«nd thelKey, hy ^^hlfcl^ 
\^ let hin\|elf la at a private Dqqr ist ther 
G«rdea: The ikft Animal he met ^as.^ar 
great ©(i^, tl»t was the-nodtumal Guard ol 
ths Place ; but : this terhi;^ Animal, tlut 
?4rinceis, (ait.of a pretended Jdndnefs for it^ 
^kd loade. acquainted witih. Fideii^ 'hy<>hav 
^iaig iHWight lua^ with h&.t^ Ram y ixtim 

^.:. / . B b 4 li<S 



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he oaly faunMupoa hiai, and ^tt€54ed Km 
to the place where he was to wait.jfor Mrs. 
Jiigaih comiog with news from his Prin- 
cefs. How tedious (o ever tteTiroi? might 
fcem to a defiring I-over, y^t it did not in 
ri^Uty exceed Jjj^i^jan Hour. ^ J^^^il ccp- 
4^^ed him up ^ghack Staiiis into JVfrs. 
Jiig^l's Apartmeat, who b^ing a pai:ticu- 
laf Favourite, had Qne fit for tlift Ufe fter 
tady once a Month to be fm^^jc^'d; p^t 

I will not repeat the mutu^lEnibraces iof 
the Liovers when they met, nor any thing 
that paft all the remaining part of the Night: 
But the Princefs loft fbme of her Prudence 
in prolonging her Joys till late the next 
Morning ; nay, heing up, they couM not 
be! £utis&d but they muft a^in retire ib 
t&6 Bted towafte a few Minutes* in the a^reip; 
aMcJHdafure:; J8ut in the midii erf their 
^ort^ the old Prirrce oomes tplthe Ddw, 
j^cns it, and was entriog the^ Roothy when 
ilie-caird out to Jiim to retire, foe having 
that Morning taken Piyfkiif flie muft have 
fioMan in the Room aMirtute; the good 
oid Prince gueffmg her meaning, and an* 
willing todilhirb her on fuch. an oecafion, 
mdr^dj and the Lovers purfu'd their :amo- 
ious Aflfair, The:next day they were in the 
fame ConditiQi!i,/and hearing the Prince 
Qome, fideli was ilipt into the Clofet, the 
veiy place to which the Prince was boumi 
for fome Money to play with j il^e had got 
"''''■ :...'■•••- the 



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rtheKcy, nor wouM ihe part with it to him 
0011 all his eardeftnefs; which he findiiig, 
-What, fays he, thou haft got forile pretttr 
Knicknack there now, which you wonTt 
iiot^me fee? I h^vefo, laid flie; but you 
fliaU feeitfome othet time, when 'tis mor^t 
'fit for fight than at prefent. - Well, well 
thfcn, laid- the Prince, give me fome Money 
to playy and Til not fee ybiir Trinkam. 
.ThePrincefs put i her Hand into her Pocket 
indgave^ him what Ihe. had there, which 
liapaed io he fufficiept fei^ that occafiort. . 
•The Princie being retir^d^ lihe Lover -was a- 
gain fet at Libenty. But confulting HoW to 
avoid the /like hurry again, Fid^U being 
yoimg raiough, they refolved to dreft him 
m: a Woihins Habit, and that he fhou\l 
4)afe for a Jleilation of Mtsl Migails; th6 
matter was no fooneragre^-oh but put in 
execikion, and the Princefs wou'd have the 
pleafure of Dreffing him her felf. 
^ After this they were much Icfs on their - 
Guard, and made no fcruple of letting the 
Prince find them together : His ftay was 
generally- during the ligl?t Nfights, and 
when- tliDfe wfere gon he returned to Rome^ 
which allowM fuch a grateful Interval to 
their AmoUvy that it kept up their PafTion 
aiid Defire' to fo gi'eat a degree, that the 
Prince now dying, -and leavmg her a con- 
siderable Fortune^ flie thought tit to beftow 
it onSegmor Fidelia with her felf in Mar- 
tiage ; which Match how fortunate ^ ever 
* -' ^ . ■ it 



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it Mats to hia^wfts tiotib to ber; forbe behit 
ieafibk of her fbrmtr Infidelity, was toq 
Wfttcfa&l over hor Adiions ever to give her 
1^ Jeaft opbortntty of fervii]^ him ia the 
lame land; befides.a perpetual cdhabitatioo 
bo& at Bed and Board, without. £Uiy Be^ 
or Apprehenfion from any Bbdy ^fe, rtwilt 
f heir Paffions fink to Indifference^ and that 
|iopi%uft;an had perhapsendedtnthcMuo- 
<^r oAQoe or the otbec, bad not his Ddtth 
prevented : But fl^e in Ms &;kne& was^&i 
IsdukMis about him, that he cou'd not [&• 
£>lye to wrong her ofany part of htt For* 
iune fhe brought Mm, which ronain'd yet 
^fpent, but Tdt^T aU intirely, Intkt 
pne Ai^n Jv0 > ia all others'witfaout Priff^ 
ciple or Honout. jSjhe Buried Mm Ibub}^ 
Ibmly. And I^iras lieftow'd on a S^tf qf 
his, who^Stoly.I m^widb^Ofcl.^w 
pver. T//,. ■..:•: , .■'.-.. .• ■>■■'.• 



T H E 

Whores Revenge, 

LVgHl/t fieUli was very . beautiful, anil 
very ypung when ncr Brother, djedj 
and in a Nunnery in Florence, and defign'4 
for a Nim ; but her Brother bdng deaj* 
and fhe not liking the then. unfub^;ant>»l 
|oys of the encios'd Ladies j quitf the H9x 

' naftry 



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t^es- & l»od'g^ HI an Eti^'inent Cid^ieiis 
flkftifc ) yhere fefe foOte ettkrgM her Ac- 
4^0^iiift49c^'' Aflft^g vi^dm was a venera* 
^ ^ildi l^y;^ '^bd talk'd of nothing but 
Dealh Or Judgment, 'and tlie Miracles of 
Saints and the Like, and yet>Vas fecrit 
Ba-Wdto the yoiing DakeWha was yet a 
fi^te'Man/aoi- 4id he "care to hfearkea to 
M^iargid. LifK^^ had a Beaut;y- "ct^asthemoft 
Agreeat^ieco Ms tafte ia t^ World^ vvhicli 
Madam 1^ B&wd knew ^' w^fi,- that il» 
^fily got him-a-fight'Of hefhcw -A<?quaift- 
tuiee, «i^kin^ ^ a Vi^t in "Vf *omans 
^t^& The Duks was if£B\tky chai'm'd 
WiJ^ htr Perfei^ bdt «»r6 wiih' htr ^it 
«fld Knowledge, having been fo gifeat a 
ilcitder in «he' Nttfuaery, - tJhaft her Convtsr- 
fat^ WftS mii»th different from >that of iti0ip 
trf" theSex. ' ■ /. ' - 

IjueitlA. is invited to the old Beliam% ^ 
Placfc fittaag for the deed ; and before the 
epilation wfas ready, theyoucff Duke was 
ai^mitfied. He makes his Add^efles, flie is not 
«vbi& jf but being inform'd that it was the 
Duke of Fioraue, her Vanity and Pride fe<Mi 
U&w up the fmallGarifon ®f her Virtue; y^ 
fee made tlie Coaqaeft of her Perfon more 
hard than that of hertJeart, left by too eafic 
a fiureaderfheihou'd leiTen hisEfteemof 
^er, and by confequence his Value and 
Love : But having kept him long enough in 
ftt%eoce to£x her £mpire in his BoTom, fhe 
■' i • ' found 



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fouad fucha nmn^ of iurrcadring, as 0)9^^4 
;^m rather a Storm tha4 Capitulation. He 
yow^d perpetual Love ajadCooftancy^placM 
iier in a Magnificeat Ap^rtmeat, and tcgofe, 
all thftt car^ of her, which a LqvCj fo4a^ 
cere as he certainly w^ ppffefsM of for the 
Charming huciUa^ couM prompt, him tQ. 

There was jn tlie Court a Man of won- 
derful Parts and Integrity , * tho^ api old 
Q)]*rtier, whole name wa$ Count H(nftio\ 
lie had fervM the Duke's Fjii;heriaan)r.year% 
^nd difcharg'd his Admijiiftration with tte 
. Applaufe of both Subj^ft and Prince. This 
;;^an had not^oijily a Fatherly Car0 ov(?r the 
(young Duke, out a kind of Paternal Au- 
thority aqd Aw ; he fiodine out tjie Intrigue, 
and in a planner agreeable to the Perfon ^ 
fppke to, jinveighM againit all. illegal A- 
piours, and.ijs'd many Argan»9nts to move 
him to think of J^ferrying. The Duk^ 
^hankM him for his Advice, and f^romisMto 
foillow it ; but Nature is too frail^ to ftiflPer 
a young Man to vanquifh an habitual Pdf- 
fion for a Woman, whom he in fome mear 
fure had been the caufe of fcsiaking the^ 
Paths of Virtue. The fight of Luc^a, ^xwi 
put ^ end to all his fair kefolution?, and 
made him think of Hortitio as an envious 
difturbe'r of his Pleafures* 

Horatio was foon fenfible of this, and 
therefore refolv'd by a very fubtil Addrefe 
to make LucilU her felf tne Caufe of bcc 
pwn defeat : He therefore comes to tfer^ 

and 



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Ti&e Whoi^es Revekge. 17/ 
asrid^examining her about her Amolir with ^ 
the piAey- flatters hfer Beauty, and Powci' 
over hitti, iftfiAuating, that it muft' be her ^ 
own fault if Ihe \<rere not Dutthefs of Fld-^* 
rince ; that having him now ia her jPower, 
fee fltotfM deny hiift the Favours fhe had' 
graatfedj and |)rt;fs'hini to Marriage. There 
is nothing in fiature fo credulous as a youhg 
Woinaa in things that flatter her Vanity;' 
Shfe theifcifore writes^ tx) the^Duke, and fends 
the Letter by Hotuiio^ which was to the fol^ 
towifig^ pdrpbfe : 

LuciUa^toCafinoGtihdlSvLk^oiBortnci. 

THE Vrnije cf deceiving an tnndcent foor^ 
Giri is hehrp the Ambition of a great 
Prince^ aim not dp encreafingyour Fortune and 
Glory if fhe Misf^i^tunes of her who Idvesyou : 
Ifyoii dejign for matrimony^ in fneyou will find 
cm vfho by VJe and Habit kHows how to ^leafe 
you : But if you defign nofuch things IwtUflie 
from your Jighty that by my Ahfente you mayjor^ 
g^ me. The Name of a Mi(trefs^ tho'^'to a Mo- 
narchy is very odious-^ and the malice oj Tongues 
has Already attacked my Refutation ; fo that if 
you mU me not to your Nuftial Bedy I will ^all 
you t<y my Grave. Farewell. 

The Duke had no fooner pcrusM her Let-' 
ter, but finding the Ambition of the Wo- 
maA, hepausM awhile, and then turning 
to HorAtiQ''-''*''^Let her go ( (aid he ) for an 



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n 



her is 4t lafi broke afimdef^ 4mL fime fire coit'i 
not nil htm to bear mj Love mth moA^tmony 
i^t her try to hear th» eotefr^* 

H>r4rx<i willing toimpFovo tih^ oppoitu- 
^i eadp^vtjufd ^{J'c^^ing Arguments to 
coaviilce the Duke of the Inooiwenilis^f of 
a (Ingle life ; he nrg'd that hU $>tatior^ wa» 
fuch, that all his Anions afl^ed the Fubilt^ir, 
dll his Subje^s being Odmcem'd ia the®; 
That he ought to lodk out for a Wife, whofe 
lawful Embraces might reftrain. him from 
running aftraf , and bring him Children 
worthy her, and worthy hitwctf ; That there 
was no Pfincefs of Europe trat wou'd be Am- 
bitious of the Honouir of being kis Wife: 
That he therefore (hbu*d felett fome ohe 
among them* v/ho befides her Petibn, fhouM 
bring iato his Coffers a confiderablt Trea- 
fure. That in the mean time he ihouM fpr- 
get LueilUy and all other Ladies of her C<Hi- 
dition, and think only of his (j^xji apd 
the Good of his People. 

The Duke being touch'd with titiggood 
Advice, difdain'd to return any-AsfiyefiK) 
lauiHdy and made it his BuUnefs tp thi^k 
which of all the Princeffcs of Emoft lie 
Ihou'd chufe, to mak^ the Partner of bis 
Bed and his Throne. £«f///4 in a little time 
found 0(utthe Aliejwtiofl pf the Dake's Af 
feiEtions, apd tound out the Trfschesy, ^ 
Horatio inliis pernicious Advice; <Cojifu,ltiflg 
therefore jier |ijefeiitg\ept, ibe g^ofider'd 
■ . ■■ only 



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ihe WHO HIS KEVBNGE, fj^ 

diify hd\}^ ihe {hou'd accompliQi her, lU* 
veagt, Thofe who i»ve Money >y iU nevci; 
Want Tools and En^taes to tyis^cam thoic 
mofl profii^te defigns; Kr evesy were 
Wtether Foyfimers^ or ASa.Bm, faave tb<^ 
Price of Ifuqtiky, onl- Virtiw is witJwwit 
aay Reward* 

There Was mFlorinei daiC^tfirmif, per&£| 
and diligent ia miidng of Potron^ in ma> 
aaging.&UeWitnefles, ai^ murdVi^ Nfea 
by Am,Sam.im. Lucilia mad at once with 
Rage and Jjav% dcGgi^ to make uTe of 
this Engine, (he wrote to Irima I^ett^ t0 
put hes defign in £xeeution» The t^tsK 
Sbs coainiiis to the muoft bdovM of her $ei> 
rants^ who had fcarce got out of dope's but 
Hartiifio met him in theiitreet, and flopQix^ 
him by a fubtil Addrei^, enc^uiring into 
his Hafte , he got from him hiS; La- 
dy's Letter; . which whan he had read* 
and Ibund the deBgn againil his I^ h|^ 
defcended from theGrcatncis of fiis Quality, 
to win him to his Intercft. He was afraid 
qC a RecofciUation betwixt Z^^/Z/^aivl th^ 
Pufce, and he knew that a Woman, whd 
had once, gon into fuch dej^rate Meafur^s, 
wou?d never ceafcto ge^rfet^ut? him whom 
once fh« had fc^r'd. Alas^ faid he, Ido'f 
homiurdikte 4 tkmg U ch^rful F^^Tty^? 4fi4 
hm d9m4§l * Glory it tkms viks^ fgliawa Cv*f(^ 
'T« riiiiuhm for * M*»^i» ^ mtifi nf Jo 
mmy forts of VAithyf to ej^e^ a H4ffifeJ§ 
of anj dtiTAtion \ Vneaftnefi fttM hs ^ mfrt'" 

ever 



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ever ite we ; AnJL amidft our Feafis alliifiki^i 
mtbfomethiiig troMblefcm and, Mfgufiful. M 
Jdnn cm have very great Advwu^ts of for- 
tuney and yet keef themlo^ : Mate laughs at 
thtfe to fPhom it gives a judddn Rife^ fmce 
her Inconflancy is a Comfort in our JffliSfionij 
and that our Amours fi ill naturally expofes^w 
to all Misfortunes. . 

With thefe Refleaioils he retir'd from 
Vlorenee to a Wood in the Affenines^ and led 
an Hermetical Life, taking with him the Ser- 
vant of Lucilla^ by whom he had difcover'd 
his Danger. Horatio had not long abfent- 
ed himfetf from the Court, wheri the Duke 
and Lucilla were reconcilM, and {o was 
pl^s'd with the Misfortune which he ought 
to have deplor'd ; loft in the prefent plea*- 
fure, he forgot his Friendfliip forjy^r4^/<?' 
There is no greater Enemy to a Great Man^ 
than to be toofincere in his Love to his 
Prince ; and none are fo fure of unhappi* 
nefs, as' thofe who ftudy moft tlie Sat% 
and Honour of his Mafter: Horatio is 
faught for every where to be put to tbc 
moli exquifite Torments, not that he was, 
but becaufe he wou'd not be guilty of a 
Crime againft theHappinefsof his Soveraigp- 
Horatio oeing abfent, he is accufed of Nt- 
cromancy, and was faid to have engagd 
the Duke^sFriendfhip to him by fefcinatrng 
Arts; and even wfet had been formerly 
praisM in him for Virtues, were now con- 
demnM as Crimes* ^ ; 

* - ^ ' ^ Thus 



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The WriOkfeS ReVENgL l^^ 
Ifhus Horatia jfoutid by experience td 
feow little purpofe it was to perfuade a 
Prince againft his Inclinations ; and how 
dangerbus t6 provoke a Woman ih her Bu- 
finels of Ambition and Ldve^ 

The R^man Griown having done ; iHy lii^ 
tieLouijDo'r^ according to Cuftdiii, began 
taext to entertain me with Affairs of this 
naldre: I know not (faid he) whatGufts 
the I/^/w;? Gallants find in the dangerj and 
difficulty of an Intrigue ; biit I aip fure the 
Matter is puriU'd as much, ahdM^itH jis 
much Altiduity m.Francey where the Accefs> 
and the Opportunities have none of thofe 
Hazards* 1 (hall not ciiter ittto the difputd 
of the lisaWfulnefs, or Unlawiulncls of thefe 
Intrigues, I fhall only tell you the Pra£tice^ 
which will lliew you Women of the firft 
Quahty, and of boalted Reputation, in th6 
Arms of their Gallants, with no other Feai* 
before th«ir Eyes, but that of their Hut 
bandS) which yet is not fo great aS to di* 
fturb the leaft of their delights. A conve- 
nient Airurance,with the natural Liberty the 
Women challenge in France^ and ^ fpice of* 
Hypocrifie on certain occafionsjis all that the 
Ladies think worth their ftudy, to fecure 
tlieir Pleafure and Reputation. In Frm.e 
tiier^ is a univerfal Leudnefs gdeS round, 
and a Ladyof Quality without an Intrigud 
at Couit, looks as fingular and aukward as 
a Beau without a Wig or aSniili-bo^t : Ni/^ 
tliQ M^rt of Qiiality make no icruple ot ad- 

G c mitting 



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mitting a Gallant to their WiyesLthaii-2 
felvQS, pvovickd lie has any lotereft to caf-^ 
ry,pn by the Reputation. It woWd be eod* 
lefs to give you a Relation of aHI havefeea 
in the French Court oa this head, I fhatt 
therefore confine my felf to a .wry fe^K In^ 
fences, which will give you a faraple; 



T H E 

Political Whores. 

TN the Time of Henty III. Froime waS 
extreamly divided into Factions ; one 
fide ha4 tte Duke of Guife at their Head^ 
the other the King, under the Names of the 
Roya,liftsand the Gm/ardsJB^SLch fide was very 
zealous in the encreafii^ the inld^reftof theyr 
i^rty, by the Addition of fuch young No- 
blemen that came to years of Age fiiffid- 
ent to engage in fuch Political Quarrels 
There were two young Nobiemen juft 
€ome into the Wold of Bufmefs, and each 
Party ftrove which fhouM engage tliem> 
the young Duke pf Gax^daky, znd the youx^- 
Duke of Nemours. The Dukeoi CW^/^ 
had feen the Beauty ful Wife of the Bar(Mif 
de Grammont^ who was a violent Royalift^ 
and her Cliarms foon made a fenfibie Iffi-^ 
predion on the Heart of the young Duke^ 
who Iiad neither Art^ nor delireof difgui- 

• zing 



\ 



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fckig a Paflioii from htefj whd dnly>cou'd 
give hiiA' Relief, H«, therefore^ after all 
tlie AddrdTes^df Eyes, Sighs, ind preflxng 
thte Haiid, d*^* took coiwage to difcover a 
Flame^ th^t was not difagreeable to the- 
Lady* And flie, who was a zealous Rdya^ 
ii0^ cli4 not doubt fixing him in that Paity^ 
Who had thus long flufttiatcd betwixt both ;: 
and file was a W oman of too much fenfe,. 
not to-fliake ufe df that pretext with her 
Husbanid. to favour their Meetings ; who^ 
feeing not very jealous naturally, finother^d 
all fufpiddn in the hopes df having fo con-^ 
ftderable a Man a Convert to his Piarty by 
the Art of his Wife, whofc Fidelity he did 
notirt the ieaft queftion: So that full Li- 
berty wa^ allowed' to their Converfatioiif 
]ivhich tJie Duke df Ckndak was too much- 
in Love, ^n<i too Gallant a Man not toim/- 
piove to the Advantage of his Pleafiire in 
the Arms df Maddm de Grsmrnomi - The 
J)uke was converted by the Lady, and fhd 
highly diverted with her Gonveit, till htf 
^mg fixt in- his Principles, and (he grown 
fertile by his Cultivation, the warmth o^ 
the Affair abated;^ and in a little time thd 
Baron liad his Wife to himfelf, gaining b/ 
Ae Intrigue) a Powerful Man to his Cauie^ 
^ an Heir to his Eftate. 

But the Guifards^ Who Wete a very aftivd 
Generation, havingloft their Hopes of the 
I>uke of Candak^ were refolv'd to be be- 
forehand- with the Royai^fts in the young 
Ce 2 Dukio 



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Dnkc^oi Ner?fou;rsj^YiQ: then come of Age 
Madam: de Chajlillon was a moft compleat 
Beauty of the Fair Kind ; her Hair was 
Flaxen, or ting'd with Gold to the Colour 
of the Sun-beams, and fell into a thoufand 
entangling Curls; her Forehead fpacious^ 
her Eyes a dark Blue, large and languilhing^ 
her Skin Whiter than - ^/4^^/fr,: . and her 
Shape and Mieii anfwerable to. thofe ad-, 
mirable Parts we have defcribM. • ; Her Sta-^; 
ture was inclining to Tall, which gave her 
Port a fort of graceful Majefty, which at. 
Cm<ce gave Defire , and Aw'd it< Her 
Charms join'd to her Zeal for the Guifh* 
gave her the Name of the Belle Guifard^^ 
Her Husband Monfieur de ChafiiUon was a 
' bufie Tool of the Party, who won. him by 
a perpetual Flattery of his Parts,4n Learn- 
ing and Politicks, tho^ lie had, not enough of 
the firft tofei up for a Village Schoohnafter, 
nor of the latcer, for a commoa News- 
writer. His Study w^s ftorvl with Books, 
whofe Gilt Backs amuzM his Eye^ but>vhofo 
infide never improved his Underftaading* 
So for Politicks, he herded with tte molt 
aftivc of the Court, who finding him a Ht 
inftrmnent for tlieir Ends, admitted him 
into thQ^Jt^^tQy on whom the whole Machine 
of Fattion tuniM ;.of this the Abbot Fou-^ 
quety sitid tbo Count de Hocqulncourt were 
the chief: The former being by profeifion a 
lingle Man, in an Honourable and Benefi-^ 
iial Poft,. might have fpar'd himfelf the Fa^ 



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The Political Whores. iSi 
dgue of ruling a f art jr, having fto Pofterity 
to reap the Advantage of his Toils. But as 
Jie was of a Pale S\(^arthy Vizage, fo his 
Mind had a Tinfture of the fame tmwholer 
foai Mixture; he iovM to be at the Head 
of a Partyt : and being in his Nature in- 
capable ctf^ forgiving an Injury either 
real or iniagiiUTy , the reft of the Junto, 
took the fame Principle, by which at laft 
they made themfelves fo many Enemies as 
overturn'd their Dominion, and gave the. 
Caufe to the unpopular Royalifts. In this 
Junto was it debated how the young Duke 
of Nemours ftioii'd be fecur'd to the Party; 
Monfieur de Chafiillon defir'd to let him 
have that Task hirtifelf, for the accomplifli- 
ment of which he wou'd be ahfwerableto 
the Junto. - Tho' one of the Junto very 
much doubted his Capacity, yet findmg 
that Fouq^uet approved of the Motion, ea- 
tily acquiefqM; not doubting but tha^ Cha* 
Jlillon mov'd by the directions oi Fauquet; 
as indeed he did. For meeting with him 
when the noife was hot of the Duke of Car^^ 
dalt^s going entirely into the Ihtcreft of the 
contrary Party, and having fome hints at 
the motives of his Refqlution — ~My Lord 
( faid Fouquet ) the Baron de Grammont has 
afted like a Politician indeed,and like a Man 
of Senfe, and one who will be advanced by 
iacrificing the Trifle of a Wife's Embraces 
Go the good of the Caufe he is engag'd in. 
A^ Wife Mali fliou'd never Marry a hand- 
Q<i I fom 

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i89 TAf Got- DEN' Spy, 
fom Wife to plKtfe his Qwn^ufto, apdiQ 
deliv.er iximfm a. Vi6^im to her CharoK; 
nor lil^e Samffon^ forget all gre^t AQiions n 
^he wanton Arms of D/fliUh ; biit he ihou'd 
make th? ikme ufe of her, thuGrmmom 
^as done, t fear he will ^rfi;e the fam« 
Method with the young Duke df ^e.mmrsy 
pQw fuU of youth, and fway'd by Amorous 
defies, a fine Woman may lead' him whe- 
ther fp ever Ihe pleafes, and having once 
cleclar'd of on? fide, there are Arts enough 
to r^^ain him, if he has not RefolMioptQ 
Iceep to what he has once efpcaisM. 

My Lord (replied Chafiilloft^ I believe 
, I have the means then of iervin^ the young 
puke of fslemoursy mv Wife is in aU things 
iiiperior to Grammm^% and which is M 
petter fc^ the defign, the Duke has fixt his 
Eyes upon her with fuch marks of Afteftioo, 
that I believe I do noi: flatter my felf, when 
j lay I h^ye it in my power to make him 
pur "own; nor fljall it be faid that Grm- 
ptonf 6,id more for his Party than I will fw 
mine. This; was the affurance thai; made 
|he Abbot fojtqtt^t aflign him to Chafiillptt 
in th&Juffto., ChafiiUm made it his bufinefs 
to careC^ the young Duke, and <arry him 
home to Dinner and Suppe^, and then of' 
ijicioufly to leave him alone with his. WifC) 
who hid I^er Inftruaion ^q deny him no 
:pavQur, .th^t might fix him in theFaftipn 
pf the Gui/ards; And the Duke was io en- 
tirely Fr?^ in. that, Parwcuiar, that if Ihc 
.-. ■■■■. ■•'' • ■ ■ '■ ■ ^ • ■'■ - hi^ 



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The Political Who RE Sy 
ftad^ixipofed the Alcoron^ the hopes of the 
^lemng of her Perfoa, wouM have carried 
the Caufe. Till he had done, fqme public 
Aft for the Party, tho^ he was a Man .as 
acciompUfli-d fot the Lady's Service as any 
at Court, IhedlQW'd hiih no Tubftantiat 
Joys; but miking him only half Blefl:> 
made him tlie riioi'e eager to pom,e to an en - ^ 
tire poflfeffioq. r 

Tjiey were both youiyg and wanton, and 
Ihe fliew'd no little gqmniand of her felf in 
rclifting an IitiportUnity fo agr^eab^* to lier^ 
till fhe had gained her point V biit,'her zeal 
for her 1?arty happened to fe ifti'onger thaa 
her Luft, fb at once fecurM herCpriqueft. 
and fixt her Gallant in Pol^ticliS and 
Love, fo tl^at he never after forfdok the 
tiaufe. Tho' in Love he grew a Jittle ro* , 
ving, and fhe, who had now by her Huf^ 
i)andsconfent hid adieu to her Virtue^ be- 
gan to provide for her felf, nor .ftuck at 
any thing in which Ihe hop'd the leaft plea- 
fure. Nor cou'd the' Husband juftly finci 
fault, fince he firfl: not only taught, but 
commanded her to th^nk of anqther^ in fo 
Criminal a vi;'ay. 

I will not tell you of Madam d'^ Olone^s 
pumerous Intrigues, with the Duk? of Cm^ 
kale (the Grand- fon of the former) Moa«- 
fieur de Beauvmy Jearn^ de CajHUe a rich 
Merchant of P^m,; or P^get as rich a Banker 
of the fame place^ the Cojjnt de Guichey and 
the Father the Marlhal de Grmmonty the 
C c 4 ?W^ 



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4. V*f J- "^ Vt *-^ V *-■ *> 



vr r s « 



Prince of Conie^ her Husband's Chaplain, 
the Marfhal dt Hocquincourty and yaviousi 
piore, ^yhile by falfe Carefles fhe lull'd her 
dpating Husband aflepp, till her. Favours 
grew fo common \\^t they wqjre not 
thought worth the concealing ; till it catn^ 
to her Husband^s Ears, who leaving the 
Court, took his Lady with him iqtQ th? 
C^oiintryr, in hopes there to enjoy her witht 
put a I^ival ; ey'n in that hq was deceivM, 
for while he kept a Servant, his good Lady 
wouM not be deprivM qf h^r Recreatioflt 
Tho^ aU the Cpurt Ladies are not fq v^ry 
inconftant ^s Madani i>^ Olope^ yet all of 
^hem have thqir fharQ of Alan, except thof^ 
who are for a ft range oddTaft ot &£ling 
the Men themiblvesi an4 debauqhing th^ 
young Girls, to purfue more filthy, more 
unnatural, and more empty Joys. But 
^his, like all other Novelties, forcad much 
at ^otirt, and was mightily ft>llow'd be- 
^ufe ^n?\yVice: Yet Madam deVenevih 
^uck tq the old way pf more fubftantial 
l^leafure in the Arms of the Coynt 4e Tho^ 



?HS^ 



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THE 

Lucky Efcape : 

6 R, T H E 

REPRIZAL 

MOnfieur ie Vemvilk was look'd on as a 
Man of Wit and Pleafure, and of a 
pretty good Eftate, to encreafe which he 
Married the Daughter of the Chevailier 
jy HarcwTt^ a very cohfidetable Fortune j 
She was moderately Handfome, had a Pert- 
nefe of Difcourfe, and an Air very agreeaWe : 
Her Husband had by his Converfation with 
Ibme Jovial Fello\vs contrafted a habit of 
prinkipgt and of coming home pretty late, 
which left his Lady many idle Hours to con- 
trive a fatisfaftion, which his Conduft had 
of late very much abridged her of, and to 
which fhe found her felf not a little mclin'd 
by Nature. A Woman of Addrefs and Youth 
need flot in the French Court be long defti- 
tute of a Gallant; and xki^Qom\t de Vholouf^^ 
being a young Man of Qi'ality, and bred 
to the Sea, her opportunity of feeing hin; 
often with her Husband, who belonged to 
the Maritime Affairs, gave her n6 fmall 
liking to the Man ; and her Convorfetior^ 
^nd ferfqn r&isM in him ^ tender kindnefe 

for ^ 

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fOT her ; Jo that both being willing, it wa? 
not longe^ej: they^ came to an EccUircUmenu 
Several haftjr Enjoyments they found m^ns 
of obtakimgV but thofe fervM only to 
heighten their defires of a' more full latis- 
fedion. Madam Venevitte underftanding, 
that her Husband was engaged one Night, 
both at Flay and at Drinking, believM her 
felf very fecure till towards theMorniiig: 
The Count isinformMof the matter, and 
in the Dusk of the Evening comes to her 
Houfe, is admitted to her Chamber, where 
chey foon entred the Lift of Love, getting 
to Bed out of Hand, They had ndt long 
Revelled 'm Joy, but News is broueht that 
Monfieur herHusbaiid is returned, butvoy 
^uch in Drink. The Ccwnt is immediately 
drefe^d in Womens Night*cloiaths, and tte; 
. Lady gets out of her Bed hi her GowQ in or- 
der to ftop her Husband from coming into 
the Room; But he,kill of Love now as Wine, 
was refol v'd that Night to lye with his Ladv, 
which hefeldom of late did» but whenni? 
was thus unfit for that plate. Madam 
ftops him at the Door, and tells him he 
muft not come in, fince MuddmmoifelU de 
Chartres was in her Bed, and juft got to f leep, 
not beiog very well. He (wore that no- 
thing fhould hinder him that Night from 
being her Bedfellow. Madam grows . augry, 
but cou'd not provoke him to be gon ^ and 
when at laft he found his FondneSin vain, 
h^ fwore he wou'd not leave the Room till 

he. 



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im i-.u<:m ¥ JCL^s^^c APH. fey 
tie had -taiken one kifs of tfe young Lady,^ 
ibr robbing ium of thePfeafurc of lymg\ 
that Nigl)t io hd: Arms. Tiiis alarm'd 
than mor^than all; but wl^tever flie cou^d 
do ho found Iiisway to the Bed-fide> he 
.ftruggled fom^ time m v^a for a Kifs, th§ 
jCoiint hidix^ his Face in th^FiUow, awd 
Madam and her Maid pulling him iway, 
tird at lait, he fwore that |iie was a perfeft 
Virago, but that in ibx^ Morning he wbu'd 
lake his Revenge ; fo hw^hat Scolding ^nd 
Pierfwafit»i, they got hina up to Bed^ Wh^^ 
Je was no iboner kid but the fumes efJjtlie 
Wine got the tnaiftery of his Senfesy^M I113 
^ept as foundly" as ifthig Co^nt faa^- tt<5^ 
|>een fupplyihg His place w^ith his l^dy; 
who immediately i?eturnM to him, and 
faftning th^Chamher I!K>or againft aay^b^ii 
Interruption 9 Ihe flew to hi*s adulterous 
Arms as fuU of l3efire and Xove, as if fhfe 
had never eiijoy'd him before; or that Adul- 
tery were a Modifh Accomplifhmcnt ^ith 
' which the Confcience had nothing to do/ 
. llje Danger being over, and the Count 
tecover\i or his Bright, they couM' not 
forbear ^.ailghing at die Impofition On the; 
Husteind , and r^folving to make life of 
their Time, they 16t flip but few. minutes^ 
until the day coming oni the Count got up, 
kfd w^iit away in' a Chair to his own Apart- 
ment: Nor n?id |ie been fcarce gon, but 
Monfieur de VenevtUe getting up , comes 
. 4qwii 50 his L-ady's Room, finds her in Bed, 
'' ^"" ' ^ ' ' ' ^ ■■ anc^ 



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and asks for Madsmmoijeh deChartres; yes 
replied Madam hi^ Wife, you have behavM 
your felf very finelv, you corfte home Drunk, 
{uid then abufe the beft Friend I have; 
J^adammci/elle affronted at your laft Nights 
behaviour, took Chair as loon as it was day, 
refolving never to come near your Houfe 
any more. Monfieur Veneville was a little 
vex'dat the misfortune, becaufe he had long 
had a Paflion for the Lady, that burnt in his 
Breafl:: He therefore charg'd his Wife to 
go tp her that day, and make his Excufe, 
and endeavour his Reconcilement with her, 
iince whatfoever he had done was only the 
^ffeQ: of the Liquor he had drank. That 
being obliged to go fo early about the Bufi- 
nefs of. his Office, he wouM meet her in the 
Evening at Monfieur de Ch/trtres's Apartr 
mept , and there have her make up his 
Peace. Madam havipg promisM to obey 
l^is Cqmmands, he left her, to go about his 
other Affairs. But here Madam committed 
a great overfight in Love Politicks, fmcc 
ihe ought immediately to have gone to the 
Lady tp inform her what Part Ine was te 
ad in her behalf: But ftic being pretty well 
tir'd with the work of the Night, yielded 
to her Inclinations for Sleep and Refrefh^ 
ment; not fufpe^ing that her Husband' 
wou'd ever think of going near MAdam- 
moifelU till fhe had made his way eaiie. 

But It fo happened, that as he was going 
%o his Office, he met with M^dammotjellt^ 

Wpmanjj 



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Womati, who had often foUicited in his 
behalfi and had been retainM by him fotnfe 
Time: Finding her thus early abroad, 
made him conclude that all that he had 
been perfuaded to by his Wife was really 
matter of Faflt, fo that coming op to her, Ah 
my dcRvBeaumelkj faid he, am I not quite 
ruinM in your Lady's gocwJ Opinibn ? Will 
flie ever forgive my drankefi Impertinence? 
And muft I always langaifh under a Cruel- 
ty which I have now but too juftly pro- 
vokM? What new Adventure alarms yOU 
( replied Beaumelle J whatjj have you done 
then to ruin what I have <been fo long 
a doing for you j even when I had brought 
her to conlefs that flie lik'd you , and 
cduM with difficulty deny you any thing? 
Alas ! lafl: Night (laid the difeoflfolate K^- 
Seville) iaft Night was my Ruin,I came home ■ 
too much Elevated with the Juice of the^ 
Grape, which made me fo whimlical to d6* 
iign to lye with my Wife ; but as my ill Stars^ 
wou'd have it , Madammoifelle was got 
into my Place fall alleep, and I like a rude 
inconfiderate Lover wou'd needs ravilh a 
Kifs from her^ which with her utmoft ftrug- 
gling fbe denied me.— Hold (interrupted 
Beaumelle) you are I fear not fober yet, and 
repeat your wild Dreams for matter of Fa6t- 
My Lady was not out of her Apaitment all: 
the Day nor Night, nay refts yet in her Bed. 
Vf^nevtlU was rhmider-ftruck with fhefe 
words, and cou'd not be prevailed on- to be-* 

lieve 



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\()0 The GOLDfEN Spyi 

lieMe her, but file afltumiflg the Dilc(jte^ 
Mfeston: Come then, I firirf you arc like 
Qther Hvsbai^, in the Dirk as to their owa 
AffmfSi and while you are fo eager in jjur- 
fuk of fifty Ladj?, n«ver take: Notice iiuhat 
is done af homet It is plain that youf Wife 
had a Gallant, in her Bed, audv this was only 
her Exfufe tor impofe upon you j I will gd 
bpjEbre^ and. prepoffefs my Lady of the Af- 
front put on her by Madam de VemmUe^ 
Whieb fhall be fure to turn to your Benefit^ 
if , you come foon after me, and prefe the 
Advanta^ I have given you* Vemvilk^ t% 
much as he was V'cx'd at this Trick of his 
Wife^s, was tranfported witli too much Joy 
ia the Profped B<?4iw»f //? had given him of^ 
immediate fuccefe witk his Miftrefe, to^ 
tliink of any thing, mora ;, fo doubling ^m- 
nielle's Fee he difmife'd her, and went m 
the Bagnio^ where cleanfing himfelf he pr6-^ 
jpa^rM for die pleafing encounter, which fe 
jferfuaded himfelf was very near. 

, BeoMmelk by thia time had fufficieHtly fir'rf 
Madammcifetle dx Chartres toRevenge the Ifli"^ 
jury Madam Venemlle had done hef> in mfi-^ 
king ufciof her Name to cover her Thefts J 

frhich with her Inclinations for Ve?ieviUe^ 
ihade her i:efolve not to be cruel to hini 
when the J&rft oppor timity. prefented^ bis ea^ 
ger Addrefs. In the midfl: of thefe Thoughts 
t/^tmville found Iier:)uft -wrapt in her Night-^ 
Gown, which was thin enough to difcovei* 
all the Beauties of her Perfon • he is con^ 

diided 



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ducted privately upStairs to her Bed-cham-i 
ber bfBeaumelkj and there left to his owit 
Courage and good Fortune. VemvUle zd- 
drefs'd himfelf to her in the moft paffionate 
manner^ and finding encouragement, pro-^ 
ceededftep byftep to thelaftHappynelslhe 
cou'd beftow; The Amorous Combat be- 
ing ov:er, he took tds Ieav€, and retir'd^ex- 
peding that bis Wife wou*d fooh be there 
to make her, her Friend, meaning herfei^ 
her Bedfellow that Night. The Husband 
had not been long gone but the Wife came, 
and found Madammoijelle yet in Bed, little 
dreaming that ftie came to Addrels to the 
only Woman^#fao wou'd betray her. Firfl: 
Complements being over^ alas! my Dear^ 
faid Madam de Vemville^ I am utterly un^ 
done, unlefs you ftand my Friend. In all 
that I can with Honour replied the other. 
I defire no more, replied Ke^^e^;///^; But you 
muft firft promife never to fay one fyllable 
of what I am going to tell you ; for bufi- 
neffesof this Nature are not to be confided 
without the utmoft Caution : For tiK>' all 
Women will gratify their Inclinations, yet 
Ivhile our peace depends on the Humour 
of a Man, whom the Law has given ^( 
Power over us, we muft play the Hypo- 
crites, and rail at that in another, which 
we dayly prafticeour felves • for it is not 
the Adion , but the Conduft, that the 
World condemns. People of Senfe know- 
that Nature will be Nature, and that while 

wo 



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19* ^*^ (jfOLDENOPY. 

we iildulge our Appetites arid Senfes id all 
other Pleafure^ Chaltity is only a meer Pre^ 
tence, to carry on an Intrigue with the iefi 
fufpition. . 

What I have faid will be fufficient to con^ 
vince you, that I have been guilty of the 
Frailty of my Sex, land view'd another 
Perfdrt with Eyes of a tender R^ard befide 
Monfieur VenisvilU ; yes Madam, I confefs 
the Woman, I liave feen, and I love the moft 
charming of his Sex. My Husband was im^ 
posM on me by a Brother, and my Inclina-' 
tions no more confulted, than if I had nonej 
lie has befides us'd me like ia Husband, his 
brutal Humours I am always lenfible of^ 
but fcldom a kind offer comes from him, 
but when he is incapable of making them 
any tiling butjDfFers. In fliort. Madam, laft 
Night, being affur'd that he wou'd not 
come home till very late, if at all, I ad- 
mitted the dear Man I love to my Bed^ 
where we had not been long, but my 
drunken Beaft interrupted us^ but I had the 
Addrefs to pafs him upon him for you my 
Dear; and on his rude Behaviour, I told 
him you were gone away in difguft; two 
things I mull therefore beg of you, one^ to 
own your Lying with me iaft Night ; and 
the other^ to admit of a feeming Reconcilia* 
tioa, this Evening when he will come to 
beg your Pardon, 

1 know not Madam, replied Madammoi-^ 
felle^ what I ought to do in this Cafe^ I 

think 



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r^^ Lucky Escape* 19J 
think you us'd me but indifFerentljr ki ma- 
king ufe of my Name on this occalTon, yet 
fince it is paft, I will do what I can to 
ferve you, but fear I fhall be tra^pM by his 
Curioficy. The beft way in my mind laid 
Venevilley will be for you, after Reconcilia- . 
tion, to go to my Houfe this Night, and 
take a Bed with me, and let him find us as 
he did my Gallant and me the laft. 

Madammoifelle having fomeotherTIiougfats 
agreed to the Propofal; but when the Re- 
conciliation came in the Evening, fhe told 
him his Wife's defign, and that he might, 
make what ufe of the Intelligence he pleased. 
Juft before they were got into Bed Veneville 
comes home, and as Before, pretending 
himfelf Drunk* wouM make his Wife and 
Madiimmoifelle drink a Bottle of Wine with 
him ; to quiet him, by her Confent the mat- 
ter was agreed : He took care to fill his 
Wife's Glafs very largely, which ( fhe not. 
being us'd to good Liquor in any Quantity) 
i^on had itsdefirM effed. Madam goes to 
Ifted, and Madammoifelle with her; whither 
Ventvtlle as foon as undrefsM comes after, 
and \ there revenges his Quarrel on his 
Wife ; for in the very place where fhe em- 
braced her Gallant but the Night before, he, 
by her fide, had a full Enjoyment of his 
Miftrefs even to fatiety, the Fumes of the 
Wine imprifoning Madam Venevilleh Senfes 
fo farthat fhe knew nothing of the matter. 
VineviUe having afted like a Man, wou'd 

D d needs 



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194 ^^ Golden bpr. 

needs perfuade Mad/tmrnoifille to a frelb Oft- 
fet, when now in all probability his Wife 
muft wake and be a Witnefs of their Caref- 
fes • She utterly refusM it, but he prefling 
it with vigour, Ihe made but a weak Refift- 
ance to a Pleafure fhe likM, when in the 
height of their Raptures Madam l^tmviUe 
begain to wake, and was at lafl: fenfible of 
the Treachery of lier Friend ; but b^ing 
provM too Guilty her felf, was fain to fub- 
mit to what Terms they wou^d give h«f» 
*the happy Life they afterwards Uv'd you 
may eafily Guels, when Love was on nei- 
ther fide, yet Diftruft and Diffideiwje oft 
both. 



THE 

Countrey JILT, 

UT the ftrange Appetite' of Womatt 

^ in things of this Nature , I muft give 

yOu an Inftance of, in an Adventure of a 
Doftor of Phyfic, who lodgM at a credita- 
ble Houfe in Paris : He was not yet a Man 
of much Pradice,and fo kept bat indiiferent 
Hours. He had frequently obferv'd that a 
handfom young Country Lady was up when 
ever he came home, and being fometimes 
escalted with good Liquor, he ventured into 

her 



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The Country JiLt. 19 j 

licr Apartment, where fhe receivM him 
very civiljr ; he few fh^ Was Beautiful, and 
bclievM her very Indoc^nc: However he 
frequently made his Addciffes in his Drink^ 
wtMch for fear of difobligki^ her, he denied 
all Remembrance of when he was Sobef* 
When he really was not Drunk he wcwi'd 
pi-etend to be fo, to pufh on an Affair in 
which he propos'd a great deal of pkafurc.^ 
Coming ho«i« one Night pretty early he 
found her ito Tears, and after much prefling: 
to i;now the Caufe, (he ingenioufly confefs'd, 
that being but young and foolifli (he hacf 
been betrayed to Maripy her Father's Coach- 
man; but, that haviiig never Confumma- 
ted, file thought her felf free, and woii'd 
Marry the Doctor if he thought fit, having 
a Fortu^ne' of 40000 Crowns at her own 
Command. The Doftor was infinitly 
pleasM with her Perfon, and defir'd nothing 
more^ than always to live with fo charm- 
ing a Creature : So having blam'd her for ai 
Folly fo much beneath her Quality and For-- 
tune, and made her promife Inm not to fee 
Iiim^ if he fliou'd come to Town (as his 
Letter had told her ) but remove to fome 
other place where he cou'd not be aWe to 
find her : He left her and went to Bed, flia 
allowing him no Liberties beyond Kifles 
while he was Sober. The next Nighe htf 
came home pretty merry, and made him* 
felf appear much farther gon than really 
*he was \ he prefs^d matters fo far, «hi*t thew 
D b 2 being 



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1^6 • The G0X.DEK Spy. 
being a Bed in the Room he aecomplifliM 
his. defireS) and the next day askM Pardon if 
he had done any thing amifs, fince he cotf d 
rcnueitiber nothing he did. 

This Method^rcontinued a while, but 
when he pretended to the like Favours when 
he was Sober,fhewouMfly intoapaflionat 
his attempts on her Honour; fo refolving to 
make the matter more eafie. he comes home 
in a woeful Condition in appearance, and 
the Lady believing it real, admitted him 
to her Embraces; but in the midfl: of his 
Joy he faid to her, Madam, 'tis now a folly 
any more to deny me, I am in ppffeflion, 
and 1 am Sober, alTure your felf I was not 
ignorant of my Happittpls all this while, 
but cou'd no longer bear the thoughts that 
you fhouM give thofe Favours to me when 
I was leaft Uke a Man, and deny t,hem when 
I knew how moft to take them ; I therefore 
now claim you as my own, fince purchased 
by Stratagem as well as real Paffion : She 
was too well pleasM with what was tranf- 
afting to fhew any Refentment ;, and never 
after deny'd him what he ask'd^ whether 
drunk or fober. 

But now another Letter comes from the 
Coachman her Husband, That he wou'd be 
in Town the following Week. Slie promised 
liim faithfully, not only not to admit him 
to her Bed, but even to her Sight, and to 
remove with him affoon as he cou'd get 
them another Lodging. The Dodor went' 

out 



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z/ 



out in order the next day to provide her a 
new Lodging, but according to Cuftom 
made it late oefore he came home ; when 
enquiring for the Lady, he was told that 
fhe was in Bed with her Husband, who 
that very Evening was come out of the 
Country. The DoQ:or was in a Paflion 
fcarce to be reftrainM, againft his Rival 
Coachman, and her fickle Jilting Temper, 
which he concluded at laft not worthy his 
Thoughts ; fo to Bed he went, and lying 
pretty long in the Morning, the Lady in 
her loofe Gown came to his Bedfide, threw 
her felf on the Bed with Tears in her Eyes, 
beggM his Pardon, and protcfted that fhe 
cou'd not help what was paft, but that fhe 
was ready to go with liim wherever he 
pleasM with all her Fortune. 

No Madam, replied he, you are only fit 
for the Husband you have chofen, who I 
(loubt not will ufe you according to his 
fenfe and Education; you have now Con- 
fummated your Marriage, and have no 
longer any pretence to Separation, nor will 
1 fhare in a Guilt that can afford me no Plea- 
sure ^ while you were mine, and as I believ'd 
only mine, I valuM you above all the World; 
but when you have fliewn your felf not 
proof againft fo contemptible a Wretch, you 
jgive a proof tlut your Soul and your Body 
are very ill matchM; and 1, Madam,fwho 
can never love the Body only without any 
Regard, to the Beauty of the Mind, mult 
Dd ^ from 



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MJ 9^ -MS, ,»'« 4hr S^ f-^ 



from this moment ceafc ever tothiiikliifld'! 
ly of you. 

She heard him with Tears^ threw ter 
Snowy Arms about liim, with her felf oa 
the Bed by him, nay, made fuch Advances 
as were fuflicient to unbend anyRefolutiojj 
but his: Butheftrugglingfrom herAintis, 
got on hisCloaths,and left her fighiog on the 
Bed, whilft he went out and grt: a newLodg- 
ing, whither he removed that very Night. 
But afterwards, enquiring out of Curiofity 
after his Damafelle, he heard that Ihe re- 
ceived her Husband that very Night to her 
Bed, and was never more Brisk and Jolly 
in all her Life ; But that fbc was refolvM 
not to keep all her Charms for the Coach- 
man, fhe had then got three feveral Gallants, 
So concluding that fhe was wretched e^ 
nough, he never CursM her any more. 

My little UowU d^Or having faid this held 
liis Tongue, wi^n my Gf^iffe4 thus gravely 
i>egaiv 



O F 

L O V & 

LOye, it is moft true, is a Paffioa that 
Rules in every Man's Brcaft that is 
not a perfed Bntte and Barbarian, yet not 
in all in the fame degree. TherQ is a Mt and 

dif- 



dbyGoogk 



difquietdefireof Plcafiiring whomfbcver we 
find any fatisfg.9:ion in, whether by Chance, 
their Merits, or our own Miftake: And 
this cunningly infinuates it felf fo into our 
Hearts,tliat we find our felves in Love before 
wc have any Tlioughts of the Mcafures of 
our Love. It wouM be no diiBcult matter to 
baniflithis Paflion in its firft approaches, did 
it not footh thofe whom it afflids, with fuch 
a Witchery of Pleafure and Softnefs, as to 
make it feem a fort of inhuman Ferocity 
(efpecially thofe who never felt it before) 
to drive fo gentle a delight from their 
Hearts. But if this Paflion be rightly 
managed, there is ndthihg more noble and 
fublime in the whole Nature of Things ; 
for it not only heightens the Virtues the 
Lover i$ Mafter of, but even cafts an agree- 
able Vizor or Veil over his Vices. Ill tnere- 
fot^ do our formal Phiklfophers, full of a 
fevere Morofeaefs, form to themfelves an 
enervate and filthy Image of Love, to raife 
their Averfion to fo heavenly a PaflSon ; 
fince in all human Affairs there is nothing 
more fmcere, provided its Flames are kept 
in juft Limits, and be not fuffer'd to bu«ii 
thofe things that are forbidden. But to 
make it appear, that this Fire of Love is 
opt an Addition to a Breait worthy and fit 
<br its Reception, but Born in it: Experi- 
ence ftiews us, that not only Youth and 
Men of Riper years, but even Boys have 
fch the Force of this PalTion* And Boys 
D d 4 and 



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and young Men being more free from the 
Incumbrances of the World, tan lefs go- 
vern themfelves in thisAfFeclion; it is more 
anxious and folicitous in theirs than the 
Breaft of Men more involvM in Years and 
Experience. This fpurs up their Minds to 
things above the common ftrefs of their 
years, and makes them aim at an Excellence 
they wouM not elfehave thought of: An 
Example will make the matter more plain. 



THE 

Force of L O V E. 

THerc was a Boy at School in a Coun- 
try Town, wno loving his Play more 
than his Book,made but little progrels in the 
Arts he came thither to learn. It happen^ 
that a Lady of Quality came to the fame 
Town with two of her Daughters ; who 
being a particular Acquaintance of the Pa-, 
rents of this Boy, fent for him to her Inn, 
there to entertain him in Honour of his 
Friends. When he was come, he firft be- 
gan to regard one of the two Daughters with 
a fmgular Admiration, then to dwell on her 
Words, and atiaft in the firft Interview to 
love her to extremity. 

This brought his rude and uncultivated 
Mind to have a fenfe of fome Caies ; fo that 

the 



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The Force of Love. soi 
the next day he went again to the place 
that he was Confcious of the Birth of his 
unknown Wound, and encreas?d his illnefe 
by a longer Cpnverfation. The next day 
the Lady purfued her Journey, and left the 
Stripling almoft dead in the place j for he 
durft npt own the Malady for fear of his 
Relations, and of being made the fport of 
the Boys his Schoolfellows. After a long 
debate within himfelf, he couM find no 
other way worth following, but a clofe 
and diligent Application to his Studies, 
hoping by his progrefs in Learning to re- 
deem nispaft Time, and render himfelf fo 
agreeable to his Parents, as to make them 
able to deny him nothing; that when he 
had employ d his Time from this Accident 
fo well, he might get leave, as a Reward of 
his Diligence, to go to fee the next City, 
where this Lady then lived with his Be- 
loved. This ftrange Change of his Con- 
duct furpriz'd both the Matters and his. 
fellow. SchoUars, who cou'd by no means 
gefs at the Caufe of it, that he that fo lit- 
tle a while fince had a perfed Averfion to 
the ftudy of Letters, IhouM now furpafs 
every Body in his Love and Application : 
For he got up in the Morning to his Book, 
while others were taking their Repofe; nor 
wouM ever be drawn to any diverfion, but 
by the Force of his Matter's Commands, 
For that Force of Love, which had pofTefs'd 
the Boy, and begot this Diligence, miti- 
gated 



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cated the fenfe of the Labour, aftcl gave the 
Muies a Charm to him which he never 
kaew before. But as it happens in fo tender 
an Age, long Abfence had pretty well wore 
out that Flame which the Preferice of the 
young Lady had lighted in his unripe Bofoni, 
the Thirft and Dcfire of Learning yet re- 
mained ; and he made fuch a wonderful Pro- 
* grefs in Arts and Sciences, that the learned 
world was afterwards very much obliged to 
his Studies. 

Growing now up to a Youth^ he had yet 
a m'md to fee the Lady to the Power of 
whofe Charms he had ow'd fo confiderable 
an Advantage, he nude a Journey to the 
€ity of her Abode; but coming thither he 
found that fhe was the4ay before Married 
to another : So never vent^-ing to fee her, h« 
returnM to his Studies, and made them ever 
after his Wife and his Miftrefe. 

There are Ten Thoufand inftances of thi 
wonderful effeftsof Love ; but that which 
is the prefent fubjeft of our difcourte, the' 
it go under that glorious NamQ, is far un- 
worthy of the Title. The Ancients in4ecd 
made two VeHus\ twoGoddcflfcs of Love; 
one the Daughter of Jupiter and boin ia 
the Heavens, and therefore the fource of all 
juft Paffioas which are founde4 on Virtue; 
the other fprungfrom the Froath of the Tur- 
bulent Sea, who is the Goddefs of Luft, 
fpeaking properly ; who fcatter$ about thofe 
unlawful, and thoic waving and inconftant 

Paifiofls, 



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PitffKWJs, that give abundance of Fatigue 
.and Pain in the Enjoyment, and often Mifth 
ry and Dejftruftion in the Event. One is the 
iource of the nobleft Happineft of Mznp 
tlie («:her of the greateft Mifcry and Paiiu 
'Ti$ tiiie, that experience has Ihown m^ 
that if Reafon and good Seace is incapable 
of Reforming them, all Penal Laws and la* 
formers only add to the Evil^ and harden 
thofein the Folly, who elfe might iiave been 
faught by one evil to avoid anotl^er* The 
Fatigues and the Confequences of Whoring 
jirc often a feverer rmufhmcnt for the 
Folly, than any Law did hitherto ever in-^' 
flid, nay, perhaps than is in the Power of 
?tny Legiflators ever to invent ; if horrible 
Difeafes, impitied Poverty, and univerik! 
Contempt nmy be thouglit of that Nature^ 
To fee a Fool that has kept his Cmch and 
Six, reducM to trudge abput in a Thread 
l^car Coat> Cobled Shoes, aiui a Pifsburnt 
Wigg, for an Age together, and carry Let- 
tiers for a Pot of Ale, tot being a Bubble to a 
Jilt, who never was true to him, nor wou'd 
give him gne penny to keep him from ftar- 
vi^. To fee anotlier in the nlidft of liis 
Youth, decrepit as Age, full of Aches and 
Pains, Difgultful^ nay, Loatliibm Blotches, 
that bring Mort4lij:y it feif almoll into Dif- 
gull ; and this by a Company of Scandalous 
Drabs, who are as common as the Street he 
tfod onj js a Punilhment, I think, that no 

Law 



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law has yet, nor any but Nature infliftdl 
on the foolifh TranfgreflGbns this way. 

As I have obfervM Men of Quahty im- 
post on in every thing, the Poetafter paffeth 
on them for a Poet ; a Daw^er for a Paints 
er ; a Scraper for a Mufician ; a Mafori for 
an Architeit \ fo does a worn out Whereof 
the Town for a Citizens Wife or Daughter; 
and fhe that has been common to his Valet 
de Chambre, goes down with him for a 
pureVirginby thehelp of Alom andAddrefs, 
There was a certain Noble Man in this Ci- 
ty, who being an extraordinary Husband 
in all things, was very parcimonious evea 
in his Whoring ; he kept a Bawd whom he 
allow'd Twenty Pounds a year Salary, 
which was ill paid, to provide nim Whores; 
and a French Surgeon whom he paid better, 
the better to Cure the ills the tormer pro- 
cured ; for he wouM rather hazard his 3o- 
dy with a Drab of the Town, put on liim by 
his Bawd for a Citizens Daughter, tho' he 
knew the Cheat, than venture has Money 
to procure wholefom Food. Bi^t this is a 
Common Bite among the Quality who deal 
with Bawds, Drury-Une furniming them 
with Citizens Wives and Daughters, of all 
Degrees, and Complexions. 

Other Noble Lords are for fmgling out a 
bright Nymph of the Stage, or the Bar, and 
keeping her for his own ufe, while he is 
only at theexpence of maintaining a Whore 
for the Publick, Tho^ this were a migh- 
tier 



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The Force of Love. 20^ 

ti^ Mode fome years fince than iibw, yet 
it is now fo common, that Drawers and 
Tapfters keep their Whores averfe to Mar- 
riage. They are never Faithful, have no 
regard to the Man that fupports them, make 
him and his Fortune a Sacrifice to their Va* 
nity, Avarice, or Luft ; they ad Love with- 
out Tendernefs, a Man's hugging to his Bo- 
fbm a cleaving Mifchief, inftead of a foft and 
dear Companion. 



THE 

Kept MISS. 

There was a Merchant in the City of 
London^ who dealt for a great deal of 
Money, and as he had a plentiful income by 
his Trade,fo he was refolvM to employ part 
of it, in thofe Pleafures which were aerec- 
able to his Age, which was under Thirty 
Years. Gaming was a fport he never mucn 
carMfoT, and Drinking, tho' it gave the en- 
joyment of a Friend at the fame time, yet 
Jiis Conftitution did not feem made for that 
Delight ; Women were his chief Pleafure, 
and y^t;. afraid to Hazard his Health by li- 
ving on the Common, he refolvM to find 
out fome agreeable Girl whom he might 
keep to himfelf, and fpend his loofer Hours 
with in Enjoyment, that a depraved Appe- 
tite 



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»o6 7>^GoLPENSpy. 
to» conM not give him witlvhis Wife, tho^ 
every w^ more Accomplifli^d than tte 
Lady of rteafure which he chole^ She M^as 
Beautifnl in her Ferfon, and Affaib4e m her 
Tempcar ; and had fhe been any Man^tfe 
buifhis own, there never had beeri a Woman 
tlBtccfti'dhave pleasM him better j hut ha- 
ving had her fame years, he Cou*d find nd 
more Cliarmsia W. 

This Gentleman Walking in the Rtfk, 
met a yOung Lady, whofeFace, whofePer- 
ion, and whofe Airpleas'd him extreamly: 
He addrefs'd himfelf to her, and found her 
Difcourfe as agreeable as ^her Appearance, 
and peffe&ly complejted the C^nqiieft of 
his Heart. He Walked with her tb long, 
that he preyaii'd with her to wait on her 
Home,, w^here, by her Art, Ihefixtliinito 
t*er Wili,, and he a:greedto remove her from 
her Lodging and her farefenn Gattant, who 
bdng aa Officer ini the Guards, cou^d not 
allow ber to that extent which her Vanity 
defined. The: Mewchant immediately took 
her vecy fioe Lodgings, and on her coming 
into them^ prefented her with a Hundred 
Guink% .a3id x Diamond Ring of more va- 
lue ; and Celebrated the firft Night's Enjoy- 
ment with: as much Pomp^ as if it had been 
his Wedding Night to the fineft and^mcft 
Virtuous Lady in London. Her Careffes 
as little as they had of Nature, were, how- 
ever {o improved by Art, that the Merchant 
thought himfelf the happieft Man in CM- 



dbyGoogk 



fiendom : Scarce a day pais'd but he made 
her fome prefent or other ; and was (uch a 
Sot, to believe that his Love and Generofity 
had entirely engagM her Inclinations* Kfe 
only with a that good fortune wouM rid him 
©f nis prefent wife, that (he might fucceed 
to his Ligitimate Embrace ; but alafs ! a 
. Whore has no Thoughts but of her Self, her 
own Interft, or her Pkafore ; for when a 
Woman has once torfakcn the Rules of Vir- 
tue, fhe has nothing to retain her within a^ 
ny Bounds, All her care was to keep the 
Thefts of Love from the Eyes of her Keeper^ 
and fecretly to divide bis Spoils with the 
Scoundrel me fancied. 

She never flippM any opportunity of his 
Fondnefs, without getting fpmething from 
him of value, citlicr in Jewls or Money* 
Tlie Mils imagih'd it a prudent care, to 
provide for her felf, if fe fliould Die ox 
alter his AfFeftionSi which flic thought was 
impoflible. She went to the Park and the 
Flay, the Opera, and all the Refortsof the 
Young and the Fair, nor wou*d fhe deny 
her felf the fatisfadion of the Embraces of 
any young Fellow fhe likM, either at Home 
or Abroad, tho* her kind Keeper thought 
her conflant to him, and that he only en*' 
joy'd a Pleafure which he paid fo very dear 
for- At the Flay She was mightily takea 
with one of the Aftors ; and ratlier than 
want her fatisfaSion, fhe not only let him 
know her mind by the, following Letter, 

but 



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but fcnt with it a Prefeiit to move his defir: 
of GaiiK 



Y 



Ou rviU ttotfure hefurpris^^dfthatjoujbou'i 
-^ feem Agreeable to a young Ladj^ fince 
daubtlefs you have found, that by experience ; 
thatyoit never affear on the Stage mtyou Wound 
more in reality in the Boxes, than the Hero you 
reprefent doe Sy in the imaginary Field. Jt leaji 
I mufi on myfelf otvn of thoje, who think no- 
thing more agreeable, I/you doubt the Truth of 
my Letter, wm^ we />« Co vent-Garden-Square, 
before Play time this Evening, and Til convince 
you that J am.na. Hypocrite, when I frofefs that 
I Love. Tours Amdia, 

The hour appointed is come, and Ihe in a 
Hackney Coach waits with impatience the 
coming oi Rofiius, who never difeppoiht- 
ing a Challenge of this Nature, was there 
waiting-her coming ; pleas'd with his rea- 
dinefs at theAflignation, fhe beckned him 
to the Coach, which when he was enter'd, 
file puU'd off her Mask, and drew up the 
Giafles; flie was too Pretty not tofacisfy 
himwith tlieAdventui*e,and too Willing not 
to deny him any fatisfaition he defued, lier 
Wifhes preventing ever his Attempts. Ac- 
cording to the Mode of Covent Garden, he 
foon made the Coach confcious of his Vi' 
gour, and gave her that deUght, that flie 
was refolv'd to take him home to her Lodg- 
ing ; but it being a Night when he Afted 

a Chief 



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Ihe AEPT MISS. 209 

3 Chief Part, the Hour was appointed 
when. the Play was done. In tlie mean 
time flie went home to have all things in 
that order, as to feem more worthy hijpur- 
fuit, and to fecure their Pleafures from any 
.interruption from her Keeper. She always 
took care to have a Maid exadly tutorMl:o 
her Will, and therefore made her impru- 
dently her Confident* This Maid, when 
the Merchant came, told him. That jQie 
had been ill all day, and that fhe was gon 
to Bed in hopes 01 getting fome Sleep that 
Night, and defir^d not to b? difturbM till tjie 
Morning. The good Man w^s mightily 
troubled for her IndifpofiticMi, and valued 
her Health iQ much, that he immediately 
went away, charging the Servant to have a 
peculiar care of her Miftrefs; and the more 
to encourage her, gave her half a Piece, 

The Keeper being thus eafily put off, fhe 
only cxpeftcdher Gallant with impatiepce, 
and being in Bed for fear the Merchant 
Ihould have come up, fhe was refolv'd to re- 
ceive her Gallant in that place and manner : 
She had provided a neat Collation and rich 
Wine, Conferveand other comfortable eat- 
ables. -K^/ir/W who hadgonceavMMountaiiis 
of his Lady, was punQ: ual to his Word, fcarce 
alloying himfelf time to Ihift hipafelf. Phillis 
lay in her Bed with her Bofom negligently 
bare.co ver'd only with a j^e Holland Sheef ; 
for the Weather was very Warm : Th? 
light was fp tempting, that tho* fhe was ta- 

E c kin^ 



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J, r/v v^urx^i^jci^ «^jri« 



king her Gown to get up^ having tdd hiiti 
the Reafonof her being in that place, that 
the Maid had fcarce time to withdraw, be* 
fore he threw himfelf into her willing Arms^ 
and gave her an earrteft ot what he promised 
to do when in Bed. The firft bcene of 
Lewdnefs being over, the Lovers got up, 
Madam only in her thin loofe Gown, arid 
Rofcius in his Cloaths all unbuttonM, as he 
generally wore them in the heat of the 
Weather. A Cap and the poor Keeper's 
Gown was (boil brought for the Gallant to 
put on, who ftripping himfelf to his Shirt 
to be on equal terms with the Lady,clapp'd 
on the Gown that was brought him, and- 
late down to the Collation, and Imving 
eaten and drank to latiety, tli^fiawd retires^ 
and the Lovers go to the encounter, which 
laftedalmoft tin Morning, to the no fmall 
Scandal of the Houfe, and tlien departed 
highly fatisfy'd with his Intreague, of which 
he fufficiently boafted among his brethren, 
according to the worthy Cuftom of the 
Gentlemen of that Family. The Maid 
was told of this irregularity bv theLandla^ 
dy ; who, according toher deiire, ^quaint- 
cd her Lady with it ; wliich was fofar from 
reforming her, or making her afraid of 
a difcovery, that the firft thing fhe did, was 
to put her fond Keeper on taking a fmall 
Houfe for her^ where fhe might' live more 
fecurely in her Whoring. She had not bin 
long fettled in her new Abode^ut iDbe feund 

out 



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iZ7ff JVfiF 1 miss. 211 

cMt a new Lover (for (be usM tofay,^ That 
after the firft 04- fecond engagement with a 
JMan, the Pleafures grew Palfdand Infipid ) 
and this was an under Dancing Mafter in the 
Houfe, A Fellow, all whofe merit lay in his 
Heek, and that but very flehdertoo. Few of 
thefe Sparks, or Fidlei-sand Singers^have any 
fliareofSelheandUnderftandingfufficientto 
make them above Fools. However Monfieur 
Cofer bad jurnpt fortunat^ into this Ladies 
Affedions, which was not only agreeable 
to fais Lewdncfs, but his Vanity, who ne- 
ver had in Affair before with aay Woman 
above an Orange- W^nch. The fiime was 
his Treatment, and as Vigorous his Embra-^ 
ccs; fo that (he thoiight Ihe hadchangM no- 
tfiing but the Man, and that for the bettor. 
But this Coxcomb was more troublefom 
than flieexpeded ; fortho'he vaiuMheras 
little as (he cou'd him,^ after the fidl heat of 
the Battle was over, yet he wou'd not quit 
her, in hopes of Food for his Body as weft 
as his Vanity. The Letter flie fent him 
was fhow*d to all the Houfe,and Rofcim\t 
laft had a light of it ; He knew the Han^ 
very well, but differobled his Knowledge, 
and plainly told Mr* Cafery That he would 
never believe it anything but hisown indite- 
ing to him^feif, or elfe irom. {om^bruryUAne 
Strumpet, unkfs he brought him into hec 
Comj^ny. That Cafer readily agjneed to, 
attd finding at laft that he cou'd not get her 
to a Tav€rn> he carries R^fiim diretlly to 

E e a ' her 



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her Houfe; the Door being open'd, and 
without any Cerimony, lead him in with 
fuch AfTurance and Familiarity, as convinced 
him of what had paft. Coming into the 
Parlour to her, Madam was Drinking her 
Chocolate, her Keeper as good Fate wou'd 
have it being juft gone to the Cha;fge — -Mf 
dear Phillis, (^faid Caper,) / have made hold 
to hrtng a dear fr tend of mine to Drink a Difi> 
of Chocolate with Jou-^ Here Betty, draw me a 

Chair for the Gentleman Adadam no 

fooner faw Rofciu^ but flie ftarted,and blafli'd 
with a Scarlet dye. He m^deher a Bow, 
and addrefs'd himfelf to her in this Man- 
ner—^ Jf^d Madam J can ycu indeed fall fo 
low J to admit fuch a Creature as this to thofe 
'Arms which are only ft to incircle a God ! }V4S 
J thrown aftde for this Animal^ that has not 
fence enough to know the Haffinefs he et^ojs ? 
Whether will you fait? what greater Wretch cm 
you fnd out next for your Embraces f But thit 
I can-do nothing to do you an injury^ who have 
given me fo much Pleafure^ 1 wou^d let th 
Gentleman your Friend know this great Rival : 
But that J will leave to his own Vanity y who hus 
taken cart that fo many jbou^d fee your Letter ^ 
that I doubt not but it will comefoon to his Ears. 
If thisjbou^d haf^ny M^dam^ and you be dif 
cardedy as you realty deferve^ for fafi favour Sy 
m get you in to be a waiter in the Houfe ^ and 
there you will be anew face^ may get a newCuU^ 
whom you may ufe a while like the Gentleman 
y9u have \ but I fear it is not in your Temf^r 

to 



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!r/&^ K E P T M I S S. 21^5 

tp make ufi of y oar goocL fortune^ and thirtfore 
AS your ill luck may he InfeBious^ from this time 
I jbAll never trouble pu. Adieu mojl judicious 
Lady. 

With thefe words he left the Houfe, but 
Cifper ftaid with her, and wouM have prefs'd 
her to grant him new Favours ; but fhe 
.with an AfTurance peculiar to her felf, not 
only refus'd him any more, but flatly de- 
nyM that fhe had ever feen him before, 6r 
had any thing to do with him. On his pro- 
ceeding to Rudenefs, fhe threatned him ^ 
with aRefentment of a Gentleman's Sword, 
who wouM not fee her abused. That qua- 
lified his Rage of Love, having a Mortal 
Antipathy to the fight of a Sword ; fo chal- 
lenging the Maid as a Witncfs of his paft: 
Happinefs, he found her in the fame ftory, 
and to convince them both of their Impu- 
dence, puU'd out her Letter, which being 
what ftie defir'd, fhe fnatch'd it away ; he 
ilruggling for it; the Maid and Miftrefs fell 
both upon him, and with the Poker knocked 
Poor Caper flat as a Flounder. * As foon as 
he recoyer'd himfelf he beg'd for Quarter^^ 
which on thefe Conditions they admitted 
him to ; Tliat fce fhouM do her thkt Juftice 
to clear her Reputation to Rofti^y and own 
thp Truth, That he never had feen her be- 
fore, but miftook her for fame other Wo-: 
man. The Terms were harfh to a Man of 
his Vanity ; but Fear prevailed, and he pro^ 
jjiis'd 4ny |:hiqg to get out of the Houfe, 



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«14 T)&« G O L D E N S P Y. 

He was no fooner gone, but the Ra^ 
that RofctM lad exprefe'd, ftuck on hec 
mind, me &ncied it difcover'd fixnethii^ 
of a value he retained for her Perfon, aial 
that renewM her defire of a frefh Com- 
merce with him. The more fhe thoiffiht 
of it, the more fhe defir*d it, and at m 
fends her Female Mncury with thistoer 
to him : 

T Wm fo futfris^A f'/fc4r Rofcius) t» 49 
I wkh the unAccountiifk ImjmdeMce tf ike, 
JeUm that tAtae wifbyouto iny Houfe, mi tk. 
fief roaches that you very unju]tly then m*h w, 
tha ic0u''ifmte& what to Tsf to you j ad 
your hsjiy departure left me nk time for fins' 
saticn: But eomiftg to n^ Jelfy Ifitpfc(e iM' 
fciently funiftffd, him for hie JnfbletKe viike 
JJtdjt whom he never J m Befere. J depre hi 
one hour to oom/ineeyou of the Truth of what 
J fay, and then cenjure we as you fmd me I»- 
nocent or Guilty. I fiftd what I eou'd nevtt 
have keliev^d; thai I eannM hear your Rejent' 
went ; tho^ 7 woud not have you imagin it ^ 
effect of any Paffion for you, hut only to elett 
vey felf of an Imfuta^ion which I from ani 
aeteji. Tours Ara&iiA. 

Rofeiuf knew not what to mat© of th's 
Jitter, but promifes to meet her the next 
iSfight at the Park near Rofamon^s Fond. 
}n the meanwhile he went to fiml out Mm- 
fieiir Caper, to examin the matter a Ji"^ 
•-■ • - . ' ■ ' - cipfcr; 



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The Kept Miss, 215 

dafer ; he found him in Chamber with his 
Head bound up, and his Eyes Black and 
Blue: How now Monfieur C4/fr, faid he, 
what difafter befell you after I left ' yoa 
with fo fine a Lady, in whofe good Grace 
, you had fo confiderable a Place? What did 
the Kind Keeper come aAd catch you in his^ 
Parleusy and give you a Remembrance of 
. his Refentment ? Come prithee unfold the 
' Myftery. Damn the Bitch ( cried out tlie 
diiconiblate Monfleur ) this is a barbarous 
Nation, they have no rcfpeft to Art; to 
ufe a Fcwrrdigner at this abon^inable Rate ? 
Why, Sir, aflbonasyou weregon, flic nor 
jonly refused the Favours {he had formerly- 
granted, but denied that fhe ever had feeijt 
pie before ; I prefsM the matter more clofc^ 
fhe fell a fcratching my Face, the Maid 
coming to her aififtance knocks me dowa 
with a Pdker, and for fear of the Refent- 
ment of my AngCT, calFd in a Fellow ta 
keep me in Awe, whom I promisM to do her 
juftice, as flie calFd it, and tell you, that I 
never had fcenha^ before in my Life; but 
I promisM tliat only to fave my Life then in 
danger, but now I am got free, I will pubr 
lifh her in the Streets, Mortblenj there ncvcf 
was fo impudent a Whore in the World, 1 
have lain with her Twenty times: Nay, 
you faw her own Letter (which Qie has now 
got from me) and yet the Damn'd Jad^ 
depies flie eyer faw me. 

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«xo i/;^ GOLDEN opy. 

Rofcius couM not forbear laughing at xkt 
Monfieur^s ill Fortune, and tho' he was &- 
tisfied that Virhat he faid was true, yet fince 
flie had made him fuch a facrifice to him^ 
he couM not but forgive her, and to pre-^ 
vent further MifchietT idvisM poor Csfer to 
to fit down with wiiat he had, and hold his 
Tongue, both becaufe he couM not fpeak of 
it Without Ihame to himfelf, and even the 
hazard of his Life, fihc^ a Woman's Re- 
venge for an Offence of that Nature, feldom 
ftops of tins fide theGrave, The Monfieur 
foil of Pain^ and ftout at the Diftance of 
future Danger, fwore he wouM have Bal- 
lads made on her, and fung about the Streets, 
arid under her own Window. Rofcius ^ndi^ 
ing that all his perfuafions were in vain, 
left him to confult his Pillow, and the next; 
Night met the Fait Wanton at Rofamond'% 
Pond. Rolciiis had no mind to make any 
doubts of her Proteftations, fp that what- 
ever flie faid found the fuccels, that flie de- 
firM ; but he told her it was necefTary, that 
Ihe fhouM threaten the Monfieur a little 
more, finee Fear wouM cure his Vanity 
tnore, than any other Medicine whatfoeven 
She enquired his Lodging, refolving to take 
his Advice. They fpent fome time in re- 
iae^ing ^heir Paffion, and fo adjourned to 
the Tavern, where their ufual Freedoms paft 
betwixt themj and flie told him that flie 
WouM be glad to fee hi tn at her Hbufe^ 
bvtt th^t it Was daiigerous to her Fortune^' 

finCe 



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^e Kept Miss! M7 

fincc her Friend was of late grown very 
Jealpus. She only made this Excufe, be» 
caufe her ladifFerenCe returned : So parting 
vety kindly, (he fethim down at his Lodg- 
ing, and went home to her own Houfe, 
where the Cully was waiting her Coining 
with impatience. She feem'd very Melan- 
cholly,he enquirM theCaufe : Alas! faid flie,I 
have been to fee a dear Schoolfellow of mine 
who is dying, and whotri I fear I fliall ile- 
ver fee more ; I ftaid thus long to fee her 
depart this Life if I couM, but her Fate is 
lengthned perhaps to another day. She 
had always Tears at her Command, arid 
then fummoning them to her Aid fhe let 
fall %PearlyShoar, which ftruck the tender 
Meirchant to the Heart ; for a Weeping 
J^^uty has a ftrange Power to move the 
Soul. He comforted her all hetouM, arid 
by the help of a Prefent he had brought 
Her, and a Glafsof tight Burgundy^ which 
he took care fhe Chou^cT always have by her, 
her Melancholly was recoverM, and no* 
thing but Joy and Pleafure fuccefeded, till 
the Hour he was to go home ; never iri all 
his dotage pafling.the whole Night with 
her, but having been in Bed till T Wei ve> 
One, or Two, he went home to his Wife, 
but of Civijity to heir Virtue, not Love to 
herBeauty. 

' If any thing cou'd havi? given her a Mo- 
deration, or Caution, th6 feveral Efcapes 
Qae had had ftiight Imve done it . but walk- 
' ' ing 



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ing in the Temple Gardwi flat fees a young 
brisk Fop, that with as much Impertinence, 
as Pertnefs, makes his Addreffes to ter : 
TheFeUow was handfcnue eaouah in his 
Perfon, and being juft in the Bloom, tho 
Down but yet rifmg on his Chin, gave her 
a ReUfli of Youth which fuppUed aU other 
defers. He was Clerk to a Lawyer o€ 
^he Middli-Temple^ and it being now Vaca- 
tion time, heBeauM it with his I^ong Wigg 
and Sword: But had he, been a Sharper, a 
Footman, or greater Scoundrel, if his Ap?» 
pearance was cl^an. Madam nevCT exa- 
mined into the merits of his Birth, Honefty, 
or Underftanding. fjoweyer ihe thoi^t 
him too ycHing to he trufted with her Houfe, 
for Youth feldom guards theReputatk>ntof 
Ladi^ it has to do with^^ a very voung Fek 
low b&Pig fond of beii^ tho^j^nt a Ma% 
dilcover their Intrigues to get that Repu- 
tation. So that the Itdiw^ Advice is good 
to the Ladies, '^^■^/^^irigw iwr with 0. Hem 
und^r Thirty y fince he mH teU to h tbat$ght s 
Man ; mr fafi Fojtt/y for he unt tell to kt 
thought mot fAfi ^m. For this Realba £he 
appointed to meet him at a Lady^sof the 
Town, who was her Relation by Birth, a% 
well as Occupation, and there ihc gratified 
her felfj and him, as long as^they botl^ 
thought fit; when getting up, DreflSng and 
Parting, he was refolvM to dogg her to her 
Lodging , having been infinitely pl^5^d 
with her Converfation* Th«j next d*y he 



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/ 



Tl^e K E p T M I s 5. 1219 

wa? there tq enquire who liv'd in the 
Houfe, and found that oxily a fmgle Lady 
and her Maid liv'd there, with none of the 
choiceft Reputation in the Neighbourhood; 
Tho* te was not very ceitain that this was 
f he right Houfe, yet being a forward young 
Chick he was refolv'd toloiock atthcDoor,^ 
and try his good Fortunes. By chance the 
Maid wa^ gone out^ and Madam went to 
the Door her felf, and was very qiuch forr 
priz'd to find her lad Nights Gallant had 
toUow^d hef lb clofe; but having a ready 
Wit fbe Wink'd at him, and ftopt his firit 
Sally by iaying, Sir, you have miftaken. the 
Houfe, we Let no Lodgings here ; and 
foftly wifperM, fhe wou'd meet him at the 
feme place, her Friend being then with 
her. Which Cbe only did to get time to 
confider how to get rid of fo dangerous a 
^Companion : But flie cou'd find no expedi^^ 
ent tmt a Promife to meet at the old place 
as often as he IhouM fend to her. This to 
hw was ah intoUerable Yoak, and muft be 
broke fome way or other. 

Her Relation liad a very large Acquain- 
tance among the Pocky Sifterhood, and 
tfherefore on her defire cou'd provide her 
with a Lady that was Capable of giving him 
fuch a Remembrance that wou'd coft him 
ibme Months to get off: So making the 
young Spark pretty mellow, after the heat 
of his Love was over, he fell afleep, and 
ihe getting from him let the other liipply 



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ft2o !r<&^ Golden Spy. 

her place. Being now rcfre{h*d by fleep, hfi 
wakes, and renews the encounter in lo vi- 
gorous a manner, that in lefs than a Week 
he found he had reafon to wifli he had not 
been fo eager for the continuation ot an 
Amour for which he was Hfte to pay fo dear. 
However hoping it was but a fmall Evil, 
and Bufinefs now in Term time keeping 
him fo clofe to his Desk, that he cou*d not 
take proper Medicines in time, let it alone 
for three Weeks longer, when ev-ry day 
difcoverM new fymptoms of a more terrible 
difafter, he is confined to his Chambers du- 
ring the operation of threeMonths ; in which 
Time the good Lady remov'd from her 
Houfe at the Court end of the Town into 
the City, and left no Track or Footfteps by 
which fhe might be tracM by the Spark fhe 
had fo feverely punifli'd for his troublefom 
Kindnefs. 

To recount all that fhe had betrayM her 
Friend to wou'd be end lefs, fince from the 
Knight to the Carman Ihe had tried all that 
ftie fancied, it being her Maxim to deny 
her felf no Pleafure that Health, Wealth, 
and Youth cqij/' d afford her. ' 

It was now the Fortune of the Merchatlt 
to have run out a little too much of his 
Cafh. in a Merchandize that made no Re- 
turns; and while he vyas thinking what 
\:ouiic to tafee^vjie had Letters from the 7/^- 
dies of a near Relation who was dead, "and 
had iefi hin^ a v§ry confiderable Fortune^ 

' ^ the 



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mrjz jv. £. r 1 ivx i 5 5« 



The better to fecure it, he ^<'as advls'd by 
his Friends, not only to go thither himfelf. 
but alfo to carry a Cargo with him that he 
might double before he returned. He had 
?°..°lf""^^' of ftruggle to leave his good 
Wife behind him; but it went to his Sotil 
to think of parting with his Miftrefs. He did 
all he cou'd to perfuade her to go with him • 
but Ihc declar'd that the very fight of the 
Sea was fufficient to kill her. So.leavincx 
her a better fupport than his Wife and Fa^ 
mily he fetSail, accompIilhM his Vovase 
with fuccefs, and in his Return home, Lid 
a little while at the Ifle of St Helkn. ; there 
hemet with an old Acquaintance, who had 
been oblig'd lately to go thither as a Refuge 
trom that ill fortune, which his own foJlv 
had brought upon him. Enquiring into the 
matter, our Merchant found his FFiend had 
ther;e got a Place which afforded him and his 

Wifea happy fupport.~But my Friend faid 
he. why brought you your Wife with you. 
when your Fortune, as bad as it was/had 
eft you fo good an excufe of leaving her be- 
hind you .? I think the farther l?om my 
Wife the Happier, and if it were not foi- 
the moft Charming of her Sex, a taking 
young Harlot tlmt I have kept for fome 
Time, I wou d never have retura'd from 

SlS-i' "f ^K '' ^^^" Prettieft Innocent, 
Faithful I urtle that ever lov'd 

fet^hM^'iiah ^'^ t'l-^^'^ ^^ ^^*'™* "^^^ 
letch d a Sigh from the bottom of his Heart: 

Al»sJ 



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Alas I my Friead, I wifli you may neicr be 
convinced of your Error in the putting any 
Faith in the Proteftationsof a Harlot^ as f 
have been, you wou'd then to your Coft 
find the difference betwixt a lawful, fcith*- 
ful Wife, and the defigning CareiTes of 4 
Whore, who values what flie gets of you^ 
and not your fclf : There is no Tyc of Iti* 
tereft betwixt you, and where there is not 
that, there can be no lafting FrieAdlhip be- 
twixt Man and Man, or Love betwixt JVfaiL 
and Woman. Your Wife's tnterefl: is your*, 
flie is Happy or Mifcrable as you Thrive or 
Lofe; Intereft therefore fortifies lier Love 
to take c^-e to guard your Reputation and 
Subftance, while it being quite contrary ifl. 
a Whore: It is her Bufinefs to get all from 
you that fhe can, and the fooner ihe Ruins 
you, the fooner Ihe gains her bad ends, in 
cafting vou off for fome one that has more 
of the fmiles of blind Fortune. And then Ihe 
who CarefsM and Wheedled you will not 
know you, and if you fpeak to her fpit, at 
you, and call you Sawcy Fellow. I am my 
felf proof of this very thing laffert; and in 
my Misfortunes met with fevexal mifetable 
Objeds ruin'd by the fame Caufe. 



THE 



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The 

Cully's Fate. 

YO U knoW^ very well tha 1 1 was a Mali 
who got a great deal of Money, arid 
might have left my Family a ccmfidcrable 
Fortune, had it not been my ill Fate to 
have fain into the bewitching Company of 
that deteftable Creature to whom I at laft 
ow'd my Ruin. The Plot was it feems 
laid for me by her former Gallant, who be- 
ing weary of her, and xmable better to pro- 
viae for her, proposM to get me to fee her, 
and doubted not by her Arts and my Folly 
to engage me in her Snares. He invited 
me to a Bottle and a Fowl, and to make 
the Cheer compleat, when I was a little 
warm with Wine, he, by my confcnt, fent 
for Sjlvid; Ihe was not very young, having 
paft her Thirtieth year ; but by Art and 
fome Benefit of Nature, the Lights and o- 
ther Occurences, flie loft at iealt Ten years 
of her Age in my Opinion. 

Sh« was of a middle fize both for Stature 
and Bulk; her Hair Cole Black, her Byes 
Hazle and Sparkling, her Skin Clear, her 
Lips Ruddy, her Nofe Aquiline ; (he fung 
prettily , was Gay, good Humoured and 
Airy, fhe wouM not let MelanchoUy come 
into th« place where Ihe was ; at leaft till 

flie 



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flie had fecurM the Fool fhe delignM for 
her Gin. Thefe things took wonderfully 
with me that Night, and I difcoverM my 
liking lb far, that my Friend (Ifpeak al- 
ter the way of the Town, which calls py 
one Friend) took occafion to withdraw; 
I made ufe of my Time, prefs'd matters fo 
clofe that we agreed on tjie Point, I was to 
bring the Purchafe with me tlie next day, 
and take pofTeffion of what I had bought. 
I am afham'd to tell what I gave herj fo 
much '^vas I befottcd on her, but I wifli 
my Extravagance had ceas'd there ; \m 
having pnce admitted me into her Atms, 
flie was refolv'd never to part with metjll 
fhe had drainM me of all my Money : The 
Park and the Play, Chelfia and all th^ Re- 
forts of Pleafure muft we frequent. I was 
once with her at the Magpye at Chelfeaj and 
up in a Chamber where there was a Bed, 
alter our Sports we drank a Bottle, and \ 
fung her a Song. One pair of Stairs tjiere 
was an Acquaintance of mine, who hearing 
my Voice knew it, and fending hisNanic, 
I invited him up with his Friend to my 
Room. Drinking about I began to fixjg ji 
Song, as I then us'd frequently to do ; but 
fi.ys he Mr. — ?- your Voice is excellently 
Good, but like all Bafes, that are fo, I 
think it founds much better at a Diftance; 
if that be all, faid I, I will go down to the 
bottom of the Stairs and try; the Voice in 
the Afcent I believe will found very ?gree- 

ably. 



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:/)be UliLL Y^S F ATE. 22$ 

ably. He embraced the motion, it beine 
indeed what he defignM; I couM fufpe^ 
nothing fmce there were two in the Room 
with her ; yet her Impudence was fuch, 
that whilft I was Singing fhe laid her felf 
on the Bed, and let my Acquaintance lie 
with her whilft the other was in the Room. 
The mifchief was but juft over as I had 
done my Song, and I thought I faw fome 
Confufion in his Face tho' none at all in 
hers. I proferr'd, on hispraifing my Voice 
at thatdiftance, to go downafccond time, 
but he excusM . my former Trouble, and 
adjourn'd it to another Time, his Friend 
having refusM to make ufe of the fame 
Opportunity, as they afterwards told me, 
when the difcovery couM be of nosufe to 
me. 

She had with her a Servant as good as 
her felf, who wou'd drink as much as her 
Miftrefs, and that was a large Portion ; 
and who having a Brother in Town,, wou'd 
needs one day take her Miftrefs t(^ fee him, 
wliiehlhe agreed toon this Condition, that 
fhe ihould pafs for her fellow Servant. Syl- 
"VIA being thus drefs'd, goes with her Maid 
to an Ale-houfe, and fends for the Brother 
of her Maid, who taking her for a Servant 
Wench was as free with her as he cou'd de- 
fire,fliegiving him all the encouragement he 
cou'd wifli; She Treated him there,then car- 
ried him to the Tavern, and from thence to 
her own Bed^ where fhe kept him betwixt 

F f Dmnkt 



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ilOi i*^ Cr O L D E N b P Y» 

Pmnkenncfs and Luft for thr^ whole dayst 
But then expeding me to Town, the Pel- 
low was difmifsM till fhe wanted him agaia 
to do her drudgery, 

I all this while ignorant of the matter, 
concluded that I had as true a Turtle as 
ever billM : But at laft by my Dotage on 
her, Negleft of my Bufinefs, and feme 
Misfortunes in Trade, I found my felf un- 
able to ftand my Ground ; fo being Arretted, 
I was forcM to turn my felf over to the 
Queem^Benchy where I fpent not only all I 
had my felf, but all that my poor Wife couM 
find among her Friends for my fupport. I 
fent to Sylvia often in my diftrefs, Ihe firft 
denied me Civily, then Rudely, and pofi- 
tively refusM me Money enough to pay my 
Fees of the Prifon, when now I had made 
u|) my mtatters fo far as to get my Liberty, 
to follicit fome other means of maintaining 
my fetf and my Family, fuiBciently con- 
vincM me of my former Error. However 
1 onee went to fee her, to try if flie couM 
refufe me a little of that Treafure which had 
made her a confiderable Fortune : But fbe 
wou'd not fee me, and plainly affronted me, 
which touch'd the very Minifter of her 
Lewdnefs, her Maid, to that degree, that 
fhe proffered me Five Guimd^s of her own 
Money. Tho^ my Occaficxis were great, 
yet I wouM not take fuch a Summ from a 
Servantj and fo went my way. Then cou'd 
I hear of all the Tricks Ihe had play'd me, 

no 



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iid body telling me one fylkble of them be* 
jfore. Tis true, fome urgM in their Excufe, 
That when a Man is befptted on a Woman^ 
he is fo far from being reformM by a difco- 
very of her Roguery^ that he hates the ^ 
Man that makes it. Pride perhaps is the 
Realbn, which is afhamM to let us own our 
felves \n an Error, or enduring at leaft to be 
caught in it hy another, who by that may 
pretend to a greater Hiare in Wifdoni,than 
oui- feh'es. At laft my Friends taking Coni- 
paffionmoreon my Wife andChildren^than 
on me, got me this Place by her foUidta- 
tioa, who wouM not leave me in fo hazar* 
dous a Voyage, but ventured her ielf with 
itie,and gives me a fort of happinefs I never 
experienced in the Arms of that Harlot. 

If you think you have got fuch aTreafurc 
in yours^ make one Experiment which will 
juftify or condemn your Cbndud to her, 
and to your Wife. As foon as you come to 
Ef^land^ and made your way to London 
go to your Miftrefs, and pretend that you 
arcCait away, have loft all your Fortune, 
and cxttly have what you left in her Haisds 
to begin the World with ; then fee how (he 
will receive you. Do the ferae to your Wife^ 
and then difcover the difierence betwi}it 
Vice and Virtue. 

Wl^n the Merchant's Frieftd had done, 
the Merchaint was fo touched .with his Mif- 
foi-tunes, he wasrefolv'd to take his Advice, 
and promised him if he found the Benefit 

Ffa of 



"Digitized 



by Google 



of it in the Tryai, he would take his Mdeft 
Son Prentice without any Money. 

The Continuation of the Kept Mijfes. 

TH E ^ind fitting Fair the Merchant 
arriv'd fafely at Plimouth , where 
taking Poft immediately, he got fafe ta 
Town, and dreffing himfelf at a Friend's 
Houfe who was to feeond his pretended 
Misfortunes, both to his Miftrefs and his 
Wife, he went dire£ily to the former; wIb 
had given her felf over to aU manner of 
Lewdnefs in his Abfence, and had not much 
left befides the Jewels he had given her, 
which were in Pawn, and about Fifty pie- 
ces of old Gold, and Two hundred Pounds 
in current Money. 

: She was at firrt overjoy 'd to fee him \ but 
when he had told lier a moft difmal ftory 
of his Misfortunes, and what Treafures he 
had loft, and defirM her to affift him in his 
neceflity, which her weicom Tranfports at 
his Arrival perfuaded him, that he had rea- 
fon to expeQ:;*lhQ grew very cold, told 
him. that ihe was unprovided of Monty^ 
tliat the Neceflities of her Friends had 
drained iW .of her Money, but that if he 
wou'd call on her the next day, (he woud 
try her ut^noft to ferve himj fo ihe dif- 
ipifs'd him, and fent immediately to the 
Merchant his Friend who usM to pay her his 
Allowance in his Abfence^, and of which 
- . . there 



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Ihe Keipt Mi ss. 229 

there was now a quarter due : He fent her 
Word ( as he had bin direfted by the Mer- 
chant ) that truly he couM pay her no 
more, having already made greater dif- 
burfcHaents for him tha|i he fear'd he fhou'd 
ever be payM, fince he was come back {o 
needy a Bankrupt from his Voyage^ that 
•he had not Cloaths to his Back fit to appear 
among Gentlemen. 

The Jilt having heard this Story from 
another , concluded that what the Mer- 
chant had faid to her was not a meer Tryal 
of her Love, as flie had before imaginM,and. 
therefore had her Anfwer ready for liim the 
next day. \ 

- In the mean time he took his Friend with' 
him to his Wife, and made him go before 
to introduce the matter to her by way of 
precaution, which having done in the nipft 
lamentable Words he couM think of, But 
where is my poor unfortunate ( faid hi$ 
Wife) 'tis well th^t I have not loft him 
too; I value not his Goods if he but fur^ 
vive: He is my deirer Part, Where is he? ^ 
Let me fee him. Upon this coming in, 
ihe run into his Arms, and embrac'd nim 
^for near a Quarter of an Hour, fmothering 
him almoft with Kifles and Tears of Joy — - 
Ah! my Love, faid fhe, do I hold thee in 
my Arms ! have I got thee fafe from the 
Rocks and Seas! Trouble not . thy felf at 
the lofs, we muft fubmit to Providence 
whicli orders all things for the beft, at leaft 

^ i I for 

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it^o The Go hT>EVi Spy. 

for me for none will Rival mem % 

broken Fortune, I fliall have thee all to 
my fclf. Vpbraid mc not, faid he, my 
dear Wife in my Misfortunes— far' be it 
from rac faid ftie ; I fhouM not deferve thy 
Love if ever I did.— But I haw fav'd 
jfomething out of my Allowance fmce I have 
hGQii thy Wife, which will do more thad 
CheriQi thbc, tho* it be got by my good 
Houfewifery ^tis thy Money, thou canft im- 
prove it for the good of thy Family: A Th6«? 
fend Pounds, befides my Rings and the few 
JewelsmyMotherleftme,takeallandbeeafie. 
The Merchant unable to hear fom^cK 
unmerited Love from a Wife whom he ne- 
ver had valued, as fhe difcoverM, was quitq 
confounded and afhamM— Whyall this 
Goodneft to me, iaid he, my Dear, my in- 
jured Wife ! Thou knoweft I have wrongM 
thee, gon aftray after forraign Charms, an4 
was blind to thofe Beauties of Mind and 
Perfoq, of which in thee I was the happy 
Maftcr— -^I know no Crime, I am not i 
Judge of thy Anions affured fhel All th?^t 
I am is thine by Right, and I furrender it 
to thee, hoping at leaft that thou wilt own 
f hat I have been a good Steward, and that 
l^raife from thy Mouth is my Reward — »• 
No more I conjure thee (interrupted 'the 
Merchant ) I am not able to fupport thy 
Goodnefs; but I will make thee amends 
^11 my Life to come. Know tlien that tMs 
§tory of my Misfortunes .was only a pre- 

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The Kept Miss. Ifp' 

tcnce to try thy Goodnefs, and that Wo- 
mans Villainy who has too long mifled mc 
ft-om my Duty, and whofq Enchantment is 
now at aoendj and I to morrdw will give 
a Proof of my Repentance in her Ponifli- 
ment. . 

This moving Scene being over, theMer* 
chant with his Friend paftthe day with his 
Wife and Family in Joy, and celebrated 
that Night as it it had been the firft of 
their Marriage, as it was like to be the 
mo& happy of their Life. 

TIk next day in his old Cloaths he came 
to his Miftrefs, but fhe cou'd not be fpokci^ 
with ; with much ado he gained! ^dmit- 
t;ance, but not one good Look. She told 
him Are weaider'd at hife Aflurance to .apply 
himfelf to her for his Money again, /alter 
ihe had wore out her Youth and her Beauty 
with him : That truly fhe muft firft take 
care of her fclf,and if me thought he wou'd 
ever trouble her any more, fhe wou'd not 
be long in his knowledge. He begg'd^ he 
pray'd, reproach'd her,, but nothing wou'd 
do ; when in comes the Mercliant his Friend 
to fpeak for him, but that was as fruitfefs'; 
till at laft, fays his Friend to the Merchant, 
i have in my Hands the means of your Re- 
Yengc, by breaking your Order, for I have 
let her have no Money fince you have been 
gon but what Ihe has given me her Notes for; 
io that if Ihe do not immediately pay that 
dawn, t have tlieOfficers without to exe- 
.''.'' F f 4 cute 



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cute a Wr^t upon her* This Houfe is takttd 
in your Name, and the Goods I know yx)ir 
paid for, I fhall likewife fcize on them for 
yotir ufe. Come Madam^ Four Hundred 
Pounds you have had of me on Notes un- 
der your H^nd, it you have not^Money, 
your Jewels will do; for immediate fatif- 
fadion will I have, or you fhall bfc treated 
with the utmoft Ignommy. • 

Her Paffion can^t be well exprefsM, but 
obligM to comply^ (he produced her 200 /. 
and 50 pieces of old Gold, afliiring them 
that her Jewels were in Pawn ; fo on her 
giving them a Note to the Perfon tha^ had 
them, they gave her up her Notes. Well, 
faid the Merchant, tho' your barbarous 
Treatment of me deferves no Compaflion, 
yet I , will do foitiething for you becaofe you 
once pleased me: The 2odL is your«, and 

5 our wearing Cloaths; whatever elfe of 
ewels and Furniture is here, or in Pawn, 
ihall be given to my Wife, who, tho' inr 
jur'd for thy fake. Treated me with Ten* 
demefs and Generofity, fav'd a great deal 
.out of fo fmall an Allowance, when thou 
haft fquander'd all away on Vice and Folly 
Tt).thy greater Confufion know that my 
pretended Misfortunes are only totrythee^ 
and that I bringhome with me upward (£ 
70000/. 

The Mifsin Confufion, with her Servant 

in Iniquity, is turn'd out of Door^ the Goods 

and Jewels redeemM and given to his Wife, 

^ J ' arid 



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Tte Kept Mrts. «5} 

and he forever averfetobad Women, ha- 
ving learnt too late, that their Smiles and 
Charms we?e like the Harmony of the Sy^ 
re»s^ that brought nothing but dfeftruftion. 

When this Change in the Merchant was , 
known to his Friends, he was foon told of 
all her Tricks and Whoredoms, which ftill 
confirraM him in his Contempt of fuch 
Creatures, and fa tisfied him that fhe wou'd 
revenge him On her felf by her own Lewd- 
nefs and trolly. ^ 

. Near Qolden-SquAre there livM a Lady of 
thisKindmiiCh celebrated f6r her Beauty, 
but more remarkable for her Pride and Lux-* 
ury. She was a pedling Grocer's Daughter in 
Su ^f^WfiVParifh: Nature had given her a 
Perion extr^mly Charmhig, and that cons- 
idering tlie Men fhe had toi do with, pafsM 
for Wit and Truth', and 6very thing eHe, of 
real Value ; for among her Gullies me had a 
kind of a; Party^ Bully, an old formal Cour- 
tier, a Country Member of Parliament,* a 
worn out Beau, and a City Gameller, be- 
fidesany other who wouM pay herPrjce. 

-She 10 far forgot that fhe fprung from a 
Mechanick, that fhe was perpetually rail- 
ing at them as a contemptible part of the 
Vulgar : When Xireen Peafe were at Fifteen 
Shillings a little Plate full, fhe complaint 
they were too old for her, and fit only for 
the Vulgar; equally extravagant in all o- 
ther things,' fhe never fpar'd her Cully's 
Pocket* The State Bully was foon weary of 

her J 



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]ier ; then the Cdunciy Senator toolk Mi 
Place*, but flie being entirely Mercenary, 
having a fairer offer from the oldCourtier, 
received him as Gommander 'in chief of her 
Fort ; ' yet in private met her Member of 
Parliament at her Sifters, a venerable BaWdi 
not far diftant fitjm her : For {he wpu'd not 
lofe the Benefit that might be made<£ any 
Coxcomb, that wouM Ihare her with ano^ 
^her. By feveral of thefe ihe had two or 
three Boys, and as they run about hey Houfe 
Ihe calls them, as Beaux do their Wiggs, by 
the Names of thofe that made thsm; .10 
does fhe h^r Children by their Names whom 
JDhie thinks did beget th^nj* She was a pfo^ 
fefsM Enemy to good Senfe and Generofity, 
ufing to lay. Men of Wit, and Generofity, 
were always poor wretched Fellows ; al** 
ways Beggars* Tho* her other GalUsts 
wou'd admit of Rivals in her Favours, the 
old Courtier wouM not fuffer it ; fo that all 
her Intriguing with the Reft was done in 
Private, and each liad their particular Hem's 
and Pays of Happinefs appointed^^at the 
Houfe me had taken for lier Sifter to that 
end. But the LadycouM not Dance fo nice- 
ly in a Net, but that fome Spies on her 
Anions, who watch'd to do her a Kindnels, 
gave the old Courtier Notice of her abufrng 
him with more thkn one, and let him know 
the very Place of their Rendezvous, Bnt 
too much infatuated, at firft lie gave no 
Bar to tlie Information, tilUfterwardsa & 



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The Ke p t Mi ssr fijj 

^of Jealaufiefucceeding, he placM fuchSpie? 
as (hm'd be fure to oring hi|T[i certain In* 
telligence ; by whom he found that he was 
inade the Propterty to iUt>port her Vanity 
andCjirandeur, while others fliar'd the Prizcf 
on much eafier Terms* So coniing %o the 
|jady's Sifter'? when ftie wasa6i^ally in Bed 
Yvitn her Senator, he forc'd his way up Stall's, 
and foimd Madam juft Rifing , and the 
Spark cfcap'd into the ClolT^t ; fhe wou'd 
fowl have perfwaded him that being late at 
Jioer SHley's the laft Night, ihe was forcM to 
lie there, and not fieepii^ well, (he lay in 
Bed' fo iat^ to recover her fleep : But the 
Courtier was not to b^ impoi'd on, and 
taking hisleaveof her, never faw her more* 
The chief Cully having thiis forfaken her, 
half the Bait to their Amours w^s taken 
away, and her Lovers dropt off one after 
ant3«nei-, till ihe was left to her own For- 
tune to provide frefh Gallants, which fhe 
did, till her Face was fo common that none 
pf the Grand Gulto wou'd have any. thing 
lio do with her ; then jQie feU to filthy Me^ 
chanicks^, who had been fo much her Aver- 
iion ; from thence to Porters and Footmen. 
When plying in the Streets the godly Re-. 
Ibrmers prels'd her for Bridewell^ in which 
Worthy Colledge (he compkated her Cha-^ 
rafter and Knowledge fo far as ta be a con-t 
firmed Whore, and Pick-pocket; by one 
fhe got the Fox^ and by the other the Gal- 
IpwSj which was the Noble end of this He- 
/' ' ' ' ' "' ' ^ • " roick 



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^^6 The GOLDEN S P r. 

roick Lady, who was endued with all the 
cxtreameft Qualities of the moft abandoa'd 
Whores. . 

I couM tell you of other forts of Whores, 
who breath nothing but Piety , go to 
Church every Sunday y and to the Sacrament 
every Month, and at Night to Bed to their 
Gallants, with as little fcruple, as if Fo^ 
nication were no more a Sin, than eating of 
Syllabub: But this is a Difcourfe proper for 
another Head^ with which I wiU to mor- 
row Night entertain you if you think fit; 
that is. The Godly of our Nation^ and the 
fious Reformers. 

I couM likewife tell you of the aba^donM 
Male Whores, but thefe are not fit to be 
mentiottM tho^ too common, and vifible; 
and of your Scoundrel Stallions, who, like 
Mercenary Whores, fell the pleafures of 
Love. Nay, they are a Vermin ten times 
more pernicious ; becaufe it is ten times 
more in their Power to do Mifchicf : Thefe 
Fellows, generally of the Hiberman Natioiii 
who appearing like Gentlemen of Figure 
and Eftates, are admitted to yout Houfes 
as Friends; by this pieans they get Accefs to 
yourWives,and the opportunity of Corrupt- 
ing them ; whom they make pay for tteir 
Folly, while the Husband that had admit- 
ted this Fellow ^s a Gentleman, pays for 
the niaintaining the Port- and Appeararv^ 
to which he ows his Difhonour. Of thefe, 
as of Whores, there ^ are different Kinds ; 

fome 



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feme Le wM or ilakhelly, others Grave and ' 

Former; the latter are the more danger- 
ous, with the Ladies who value their Repu- 
tation^ tho% they wou'd enjoy the Pleafur^i 
For on their Gravity they promife Cautioil 
and Secrecy; for there are Ladies fond e- 
aough; of a private Amourj who will not 
tvutk their Fame to a Man that has no re- 
.g^r4 tohisowh; while they thinking it fe* 
cuijeiiil the Hands of one of thefe Grave 
Stallions, they ftretch their Purfes to oblige 
him» Thefe are more inexcufable than 
AVhoreSi becaufe^y feek out and teffipt 
thofe they Riiin , . Whores are laughc to^, 
Thefe are Men^ !and while there are Wars 
ia the World ought not to quit the Encotinr 
ters; ^ Mars fof thofe of Vtfius: Be(id6S| 
Womefi have, not all the Opportunities an4 
Means of employing themfelves, and living 
bandfomly by their Induftry; a Man may 
always jmt himfelf forward in one Poft or 
another. The Whores have nothing to Ao 
with/Corrupting, of Families; but thefe 
Stallions invade other Mens. Rights, and 
Iput their own Spurious liTue in the Ropxn 
of the Right Heir of the Family. In fliort, 
inftead of our Reformers falUng on the poor 
Whores who take up with Half a-Crown, 
they fliouM fearch into thefe Scoundrels,that 
Revenge the Whores^Quarrel on their Wives 
and Daughters. 

I couM give you fome Inftances of tht? 
Villainy of thefe forrof Creatures, which 

con* 



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fcontain the higheft Treachery, and tU 
sreateft Ingratitude: But the Night ]i fo 
&r Dvafbd , that I fear you are now 
quite tired xVith my tedious Difcourfe. 
However this Ufe you may liiake of 
the Difooveries we have given , yoii d 
this Kind , to fix in your Mind , That 
there is no Whore in the World, hoWjJlau- 
fible foever fhe may feem, how dear, prci- 
tefting and loving ; that cares one Fart&ag 
for any Man by y^'hom Ihe has any Beifc- 
fit, dr to whom flie owes any Gratitude. 
*Tis true, few of the moft {Mrofligate Whores 
there are, who has not fome beloved Scouti- 
dret, oa whom ihe Iquanders what fhe k$ 
got by her Cully. You fee th« Nature d 
all the Trade in thefe few Inftances.we Imve 
given you ; fo that if you are after this 
mifkd by their &lfe Charms, and M&x 
Proteftations, you are without excufe. ^ 
- My Zfsalaus Guinea here putting anttld 
to his Difcourfe, with thanks totheGf^^ 
Sf>ieSf I furn'd my felf to my Reft ; which 
in a littleTioie I found combing on me'moft 
agfceably. 



. I. 



THE 



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?iy 



THE 

Fifth Nights Entcrtaitlmerlt 
The Godly and Reformers, 

IWas fo picas'd with the Difcoveries I 
had made by my Galden Sfies^ that I 
retifM hoine with pkafUre evayEvca- 
ing betimes ^ but this Day had pro* 
duc'd bth^i^Buiioefs, that took me up ibme 
time after it was dark : For as I was f o^ 
turning home , I was fent for into the 
Neighbouriiood by a Friend y to B^yL a 
youijg Lady that was taken up by the Re- 
forming Conftables, as lhe!was leading 
home to her Father's Houfe by a Relation* 

Whea I came, I fcwind the poor Lady all 
in Tears, and the Gentleman, who had feat 
for me, a. little in Drink, and Swearing at 
the Rogues of Reformers. The Conftable 
was a Zealot, and took notice of all his 
Oaths, and Swore before the Juftice that he 
had Swore about Two Hundred ; for wtjidi 
he was obliged to pay. I endeavoured to 
ihitigate the Matter with the Conflabte, 
and Wheedle him very fmootblyi to prevail 

with 



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With him to ftay till Juftice -was 

come home, who was an hoiieft Gentlemap, 
and had been out at his Bottle till it Was 
now paft Ten a. Clock when News was 
brought that he was come home. By good ^ 
Fortune the JufticQ knew both the Gentle- 
man and the young Lady^ fo difdiifs'd tllem, 
and gave the Conftabie a very fevere Rp- 
prinjand ; which made him go out mutter- 
ing to himfelf, that he wouM bring no more 
Grift to his Mill. x 

The Juftices Coach was yet at the Door, 
which being ftopp^d^the Lady was fenthoo^e 
in it for fear o£ any frefh difafier of that 
Nature ; and the Juftice floppiqg .us todrink 
one Ibhtary Bottle till the Return of the 
Coach, I be^anto enquire what he thoqglft 
of thefe Reformers? 

Why truly (faidhe) I^mof thc.Opim- 
on.of a Learned and Worthy Judge, who 
is the Honour of the Bench where he pre- 
fides i who when the vFellows .v^nt aboBt 
to get People of Fafhion to fubfctibe to I}?. 
of their precious Society of Reformation of 
Mariners, told them with ah. honeft Heat, 
That he did not find this Age any Wickeder 
than tl^ laft ^ and fine ethat did weJi enough 
without JR^eformers, he cou'd fee no occa- 
fion for ^thjem now^ nor wquM he fet Jiis 
-Hand to their P^per. Tho' this Noble 
Judge refused it^ yet the Jeft on it is, they 
went to the Perfdns the m«ft reinarkable for 
their frequent and profels'd GaUaatry to the 

Fair, 



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The Godly /m^^ Reformer?. 241 
Fair, who willingly fubfcribM to be of a So- 
ciety, which pretended to dired their dili- 
gence againft the very Frailty for which they 
had the greateft Inebriation. But this indeed 
muft be faid for fome of the great Ones in this 
particular, they fubfcribM forthefupprefling 
of poor Whores, not of thofe who were Rich ; 
of them who got but little by playing >the 
Whore, not of thofe who got a great Deal. 
The Projeft indeed was calculated for great- 
er Defigns than every one is aware of^ no 
left than the fubverfion, as fome pretend 
to tell you, of the Church and State ;. at 
leaft it is fo far plain, that had People come 
in as was expeaed, and had it l>eeri coun- 
tenanced fo much by the Men in Power, 
as the Projeftors defignM, it would, in a lit- 
tle time, have brought every thing under its 
Power, and have provM as villainous as the 
Inqiiifition of Spain or Rome. But fome wife 
Men found t)ut the Aim of it, and fo left it 
to languifh in the Hands of Beedles, Head- 
boroughs, and hired Conftables^ and fome 
needy or bufie Juftices of the reace, who 
either have nothing, or but little elfe to de- 
pend on, but their ComniijQion, encourage 
thefe Iiiforming Rafcals, who bring Grill 
to their Mill, and nothing elfe has kept them 
up fo long. But concluded the Juftice,God be 
praifcd, I have an Eftate of my own indepen- 
dent of any fuch Roguifli ways of Support, 
fo" that 1 dare check the Infolence of Con- 
ftabies, and do an honeft Gcmleman a piece 

Gg of 



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243 i/lf Ci O J.P EM Spy. 

of Service by Chance; as I have you iWRV 
and your Coufin, the' I muft tell you, that 
it was much that the Conftable coiUd h% 
perfbaded to come before me. 

The Coach by this time being come, the 
Juftice obliged us to take it home, and the 
Night being fomewhat dark, and the Watch 
very, troublefome , we were glad of the 
Oflfer. 

I was vext to have been kept To long 
from my dear Golden Sfhsy and longM to 
hear what Difcoverics they had made of 
Things of this Nature,which carries theAwe 
of a Religous Pretence: As foon as 1 came 
home I haftenM to my Chamber, and un- 
dreffing my felf with fpeed,liaid me downin 
my Bed, and thus addrefsM my felf to my 
Guima^-^ — I fuppofe, you Forraign Pieces 
have known but little of what I now en- 
quire about, and therefore I apply my felf to 
my Britilh Piece, to let me kno^ what Dif- 
eoveries he has made amongft the Refor- 
mers; my Reafon of Enquiry I told, by a 
Relation of what had kept me lb long from 
their Company. 

I confefs, (laid the Raman Crown) Re- 
formation of any thing is what wfearenot 
very foiid of in the City and Court oi 
Rom^ J leaft if we IhouU give way toitun* 
der any Pretence, it Ihould get a Head, and 
Curtail the Gown: Yet by the little I 
have ieen, j muft needs fay, I think the 
Met^iod we take in the Cities oUtalj^ feems 
-> . more 



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The G ODLY and R e p o it m e r s. 24} 

more reafonable, and more likely to re- 
form Offenders, than tbatwhich is taken ia 
this Place. Firft I take it forgrarited, that 
it is not in the Power of Maft, nor in all 
the Diligence of Magiftrates, to put an end 
to Whoring^ to keep Men Chafte, "and with^ 
in the Bounds of what is Lawfu[,and Religi^ 
ous ; couM that indeed be done, there wou'd 
be fome ground for all this Stir* But till 
you Reformers can make a new Nature^ 
they labour in vain at a Thing, that the 
Corruption of Mankind can never fiiffer to 
be abolifliM./ Your Severity is fliown a* 
gainft the poor Traders in Fornication, not 
apinft fuch as being private Whores, Cuck- 
old their Husbands, and induce a fpurious 
Iflfueinto his Family for Negligence, wher^ 
ever the Injury is greateft, th^re mnft be 
the greateft Offence. Now whqn you pay 
your Woman her Price, youdontfjniury to 
any but your fclf: But whee you make^a 
Cuckold of a Man, you injure him, ^uid 
all his Family; if you deboachhis Daugh-^ 
ter, you bring her to Ruiae ; but the Son 
with the Trader, far lefe injurious, and 
by Confcquence far lefs Criminal. But if 
you fupprefs the Traders ift Fornication ia 
General, or moleft them too much in theiir 
Occufjation, you leffen their Trade or de- 
ft roy it, andf turn all Chofe who wiU fee 
Whoremafters into Adulterer^^ which as I 
take it, is outof the frying Pan into theFire^ 
Now the fage Wifdom of the JtaUoHs con^ 

G g a fidering. 

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244 T^^^ GoldenSpy* 
fidering, that humane Nature was not to b© 
alterM by Humane Laws, contrivM Laws at 
lealt tliat Ihould aim at a Reparation of thbfc 
Defects, by a true Repentance. The Wo- 
men therejbre that deal in riiat way are 
cpnfinM to a certain part of the Town, pay 
the State a fmall Tax, and are protefted 
and righted in their Gains : But then they 
are obligM all to be at Church, or at leait 
are at a Place aflignM to that Office, and to 
hear a Sermon againft the vicious Gourfe to 
which they have devoted therafelves* Now 
thi^ J take to be more the Rationale of the 
Matter, than the hunting of Whores out 
of tjieir Burroughs, with reforming Tiez- 
crs, to throw them into an abandon'dGoal, 
where they learn only to be more hardened 
in their Iniquity. 

\ ;^or my. part, I fpeak as a fair Stander-by 
betwixt the Difference of Religion among 
themy for they are no more to me than a 
Paacake, for I have no more a Soul to be 
layed by the one, than a Stomach to feed by 
the other ; but you feem to carry things too 
fee, and rejeO: things purely becaufe in ufe 
with the Papifts, without examining ^vhe- 
ther iiift or reafonable, or not. Thus you 
n^jefl: itheUfe of the Gregorian Regulation of 
the Year, becaufe he was a Pope who fet it a 
FooKi^thQ' it is raanifeft to a Child, that it 
fe muchjiiore perted than ihzt oi JuUus 
Cajaff who if not a Pope, was a Heathen 
Ufurper. ; __ \ / 



i'^—'- 



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, I confefs (afFum'd the Guineayfinding that 
the ftrang^ piece had done ) that I can* 
noi[ in my own Reafon find any ground to 
quarrel with \yhat the R^man Crown has 
ipoken ; for ini^eed, all that our Reformers 
have done, has been of young Whores to 
make old ones; of Bamful Whores, to 
'make Impudent Strumpets; confirming 
them by a Bridewell Difcipline in thofe Vices, 
in which they were before only newly ini- 
tiated. But then we muft confider that we 
are generally hurried away more by nieer 
Words than Things ; to attempt the lame 
Regulation in this Country, wouM beto 
make the Canters cry out, that we were e- 
ftahlifhing Wickednefs by a Law, tho' it be 
the only way in the World that can give the 
leaft Profpea: of leffening a Vice, that can 
iiever be enrirely rooted out. 

But this is not all, thofe Hands which are 
fet to the Plow in t\iis Sham Reformation^ are 
the moft Wicked the Nation can produce; 
Fellows thdt vtake Bribes to flip over a 
Whores Lodging, and will Swear in ano* 
thcr that he knows nothing of but her 
Name., The fame happens in their fwear- 
ing about Oaths : In a Tavern with them 
the other Night , one of thefe Informers, 
with a Friend or Two : The Fellow was 
Drunk, yet Zealous in his Drink, and In- 
tent on his Bufinefs, he fanciied that the 
two in his Company fwore; they believing* 
him in Jeft l^ugh at the Froiick, and bid 

Gg J him 



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him put each down fo many Oaths; the 
Mafter of the Houfe coming; in, he fj^ke to 
him about three Words and pafsM on about 
his Bufinefs, the Company bantering him 
on, bids him fct the Matter of the Houfe 
Fifty Oaths,theDrunkenInformerdoes what 
he is bid; but the next day goes before a 
Magiftrate Sober, and Swears all he found in 
his Book^ tho* he made the Mafter of the 
Houfe guilty of fix times the Oaths that he 
^ke Words* 

But let us look into the Men that are em- 
ployed: Among the Reft there is a Presbjte- 
Hm Tayler and Tally-man, who lives by 
felling the Whores Rigging of all forts on 
Extortion, a Man likely to be puftiM on by 
a Pious 2^1 for Religion : Another is a 
broken Shoemaker, who^ unable to live by 
his Trade, through Idlenefs, fets up for an 
Informer at the Salary of fo much a Week, 
and what Perquifitcs he can get from the 
depending Whores : A Third is a Bodice^ 
maker, and he quits his Trade to be a Re- 
fenning Conftable, which if it were not 
very Beneficial, his Zeal wou'd never chufe 
before a reputable Trade ; efpecially fince 
JVlen of Probity and Bufinefs chufe rather 
to Fine, than ftand Conftable even for their 
year : Yet thefe Reformers keep fuch a Port 
all the Years of their Lives. Now where 
the Advantage is fo vifible to their Pockets, 
and the Proof of their Religion fo fmall and 
invifible, it is no Breach of Charity to be- 
lieve, 



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The Reforming Constable. 247 
liev6, that the Devil hitnfelf might be one 
of our Reformers without fettin^ up againft 
his dwn Kingdom, which by his falfe Zeal 
and Hypocriue he every day enlarges. 

Thus the late Saint DfiiVT, of whofe' 
death the Judges difcoverM another Notion, 
than that of the Parfon who Canohiz'd 
him in his Serrtion. I jQiall give you a 
Story, which will iliew you the Temper of 
them all ; for I had not been parted long 
from the very Lady that ftifFerM, by his 
'Roguery, before I came into your Hands. 



St. D E NT: 

OR, THE 

ReformingConftabk 



"DUT 1 
jt5 matt( 
a little higl 



becaule I wouM fet the wholft 
matter in a clear Light, I muft begin 
le higher, tolhew a probability at leaft, 
that thisDEA^r was aTool to the perfeftiiig 
a former defign a*ainft the Lady I mentidil: . 
You rauft therefore know, that their li<^es^ 
within a Mile of Charing-Crofs a Ferfon who 
has the Title of Captain ; He is by Birth a 
North-Briton^ his Father was a fort of ^cots 
Scrivener, by which and other means, he 
got a tolerable Livelihdod ; But being 
plagued with an intolerable Scold of a Wife, 
G g 4 the 



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the poor Cuckold thought it better to v^^ 
ture Honourable Scars in the Field, than an 
ingtorious Scratching at Home: To tliis 
end he went fovHoHap^Jy where he arivM to 
the Honour of carrying a Brown-Musket. 
But Madam Termagant wou'd riot fufFer 
him to enjoy even this wretched Retreat of 
Cannons and Bullets, far lefs terrible than 
her Tongue; but fpeedily purfues him with 
our young Hero in a Snapjack at her Back, 
and twanty geud Scots Poonds in her Pocket, 
and getting an Eleemofynary Paffage to the 
BriHy flie prudently lays out her Treafure 
in a Cai^o of Geneva, 2l Comodity of good 
Sale among the Soldiers, while fhefollow'd 
the Camp in diverfe Capacitieis, Having 
now raisM her Stock to greater Adventures, 
jBhe pafsM the Seas frequently,- but at one 
time in the Company of a Foot Soldiei; 
( whofe Clothes fhe us'd to mend, and be- 
twixt whom and hei- felf many a good Turn 
had pail while yet h^r Husband was alive ) 
and by her addrefe ( being now a buxorti 
Widow) got the Woodcock into the Noofe ; 
and (o from felling Geneva^ and following 
theCampj^ came to be a CoUonePs Lady; 
for to that Honour did the Fopt Soldier 
arive after he had got fo great a Treafure 
as the Mother of our Hera The young 
$tripling in the mean time growing up, was 
preter'd to the honourable Foft, of a Foot- 
man to a certain Widow Lady : From 

whencQ, on his Father-in-Law's Rife? ^^ 

was 



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The REFORMING eONJTABLE. 2\^ 

wasadVancM to be a Trooper, which Dig-: 
nityhe forfeited, having his Sword broke 
over his Head forfufpiqion of purloining a 
Utenfil calPd a Silvar Tankard. Under this 
Misfortune he retires to /r^/W, and to re- 
deem his paft Lofs of Time, Marries the 
Widow of ail Innkeeper of Dublin : But 
fickle, like the Heroes of old, he quits his 
fair Ventis^ having had a Son by "ter, and 
once more applies himfclf to Mars in the 
poftof aTrooperfor Ji/sgwj \vhich Place, 
and the Gallows, aswdl as the Sea, refused 
no Man. Here being near his Father-in- 
Law, he was. much entrufted by him ; but 
how faithful to the Truft he proved, appears 
from his putting 20C6 /• in his own Name, 
which the Colloael gave him only to carry; 
to the Bankers. It ^puM be ^ndlefstotell 
you half the Exploits of this Hero\ I fhall 
therefore only add, that as he Cheated his 
, Eather-in-Law, fo he was fhrewdly fufpe£t- 
ed of Poyfoning his Mother ; for fhc died in 
a Day or two after Ihe had been Drinking 
with her Son at the Tavern. Thus, Rich 
with the Spoils of more than one, and 
beiqg now weary of his Wife, he leaves 
her >yith her Son in Ireland.^ zwA paiTes 
t:he Seas for Lonuon, there to purfue ano- 
t:her Courfe ; he had LodgM at a Tay- 
ler^s . Houfe , where he lik*d the eldeft 
Daughtei' very well ; and thither he goes 
again in hopes of getting a frefli Maiden- 
head^ and living like a Gentleman, iincc he 

now 



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s5o The GdtDttf a^W. 
now had the Poft of orie, by keeping his 
Miftrefs. However Matters were maniigM> 
Ite got the Taylers Daughter in the ftiind, 
and with his&<;/iArtimpofesonthe Father, 
lb far that he was Married to hisDaughtet. 
by which he got Lodging and Diet, arid 
what Money the old Sntch-ioufe couM part 
with. Madam took ftate upon her^ and 
the Honourable Captain improved his time 
fo well, that he Purchase many_Houfes ; 
but all along neglected to fiippdrt his own 
Wife in Ireland. She comes over and di- 
fturbs him, gets a little Money, and a pro- 
mife of an yearly Allowance, Signs aFaper 
difowningall Clairtito him as a Wife, and 
that in her Maiden Name. Having thus 
g/at rid of his Lawful Wife, he wa^s mtlch at 
eafe, but never couM keep his Haild out of 
Miichie£ There was a Gentlfe«an of Fa- 
feion livM next Door to him, who with his 
Lady were come to a very great Familiarity 
with him and his fuppofed Lady, the Tay- 
ler*s Daughter. 

The Captain was always an infinuating 
Perfon, and the Gentleman his Neighbour 
was a very honeft unfufpcftingPerfon, who 
put a great Confidence in the Captain's fin- 
cerity, veracity and underAanding ; but his 
Lady, who perceivM the cunning defi^ns 
of the Captain more than her Husband did, 
therefore always countferminM his defigns. 
The Captain found out the Remora of his 
Projeds, and therefore fecretly vowM a 

Re. 



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The RiFORMiNG Constable, i^i 
Revenue, that fhouM put her out of tim 
way dt keeping hor Husband out of his 
CI;ut;ches. 

But he had waited long in vain for attop^ 
portunity, till her own good Hottfewifery * 
exposM her to his Merw. She had fevM . 
unknown to her Husband about Fifty 
Ppunds, which by the help oi a Friend flie 
had put out to Ufe : But a|M*cqimt«tance 
one day Wanting Ten Poinds on a very ur- 
gent Occafion, »ie took Coach, and call d on 
TCT t^riend at the CofFee-houfe to ask hint 
for fuch a Summ ; h€ aflur'd her he had not 
fo much about him, but ^hat if fhe wouM 
go with him to any Tavern zboatW^mh^ 
fier^ he wou'd fend a Porter home for the 
Money, The matter being agreed, h^ re- 
membredy that the Night before he had 
drank f^ne good Wine at a Tavern neaf 
the Abby, and as he thought, the nearefl 
to ity which Was the Horn ; but not know* 
ing the Sign, he bid the Coach go to the 
Tavern by the Church-yard, Being come 
out of the Coach, he fancied that it; was not 
the fame Tavern; but being lighted up 
Stairs by a Servant Maid^ he caFd for tte 
Drawer, biitwas anfwer'd that they had no 
Drawers in that Houfe ; this a)nvinc'd him 
of his Error, but defigning only taftaytill 
he had fent a Porter for the Money, thought 
it not worth the while to remove for a Pint 
of Wine, which With a Fire was aU that 
hecairdfor, except a Porter, and Pen, Ink 

and 



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«5« The GoLDEKSpy. 

and Pappr : But while he was Writing,fhe fit- 
ting on one fide of the Table, he Writing on 
the other, in comes the Reforming Confta- 
ble and his Watch and hurries them away; 
having firft ask'd their Names, which ig- 
norant pf the ill ufethat was mad e^ of it, 
they g^ye iij falfe, unwilling to expofe their 
own onfuch anOtcafion. 

Before the Juftice they muft go ^ and 
before ^ Juftice fit for the purpofe ; for the 
Gentleman they went before, is faid to 
have a Wife, that has made him ufe even 
Cruelty to all the Fair Sex that are brought 
before him. St. Dent was very bufie about 
the Juftice, who asking whp the Lady was, 
he replied, that her Name to his knowledge 
was Smithy a conimon Strumpet, that ply'd 
^'ery Night at thePlay-houfe Paffage. The 
t,ady, who before had afTum'd that Name 
to conceal her own, came up to him, aad 
throwing up her HDods,ask'd him with fome 
vehemency whether he knew her or not? 
He repUed again what he had faid before, 
aflferting that he cou'd Swear it. After 
St. Dent had affirmM it, it was in vain to 
contend it with the Juftice, tho* there were 
thofe prefent who knew her, befides the 
Gentleman with whom flie was . but her 
Mittimus muft be made for Bridewell^ all 
that was urgM was . in vain, the Juftice is 
inexorable, and away flie is carried. But 
the next Morning the Gentleman had got 
Bail, and delivered the enchanted Lady 

from 



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The REF0R>/iiN6 Coi^stable. i^^^ 
from Captivity, and all might yet have 
been well, but that forae who were for 
helping the Informers and Reformers to 
Ruin a Family^ took care to carry her Huf^ 
band word of all that had paft; upon thiff 
Word was fent to her not to com^ near 
home, the Storm was too high, and he^ 
abfence wouM be much better till the ncnfe 
of the Adventure was over. 

In fliort^ the Roguery of this Conftable 
was the occafion of the Ruin of the 
Lady, the Infamy of the Children, and the 
Deftru£tion of jthe Family, without doing 
any body the leaft Good, unlefs it were by 
the Fee for a Mittimus, and the paying the 
Prifon Fees, and the Bail-Bond. 

Nay ( faid the Lewis d'Or) fince beiilg in 
this Country I have been in the Hands of 
the Godly, and been Witnefs of their Art- 
ful Hypocrifie : But I wonder that thefe 
mighty Reformers of Manners extend their* 
Care only to Whoring,Drinking and Swear- 
ing,_ all Vices bad enough it is confefs^d^^ 
yet all retain fome certain .fort of Human 
Frailty abftrafted from Malice, which is a 
Vice one wouM think peculiar to the Devil j 
and that is perhaps the Reafon the Godly 
leave it untouchM. j&ickbiting, Detraftion^ 
Calumny, Genfuring our Neighbour, over- 
reaching him in our Dealings, Extortion, 
Oppreffion of the Poor and the Needy, is a 
Task worthy true Reformers; thefe do a 
Thoufand times the Mifchief in the World 

which 



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S54 ^^ VJULDEN JDPY. 

whichthe others ever did. Match-making 
for their own Profit, without any regard to 
the Good of thofe they joyil together ; get- 
tiag of Trufts which they make a Market 
Qf, aad the Uke, are Sins that the Godly 
will have no hand in Reforming, l)ecaufc 
they bring them in fo confiderabie an Ad- 
vantage. 



THE 

Hypocrite Uncas'd, 

I Was once in the Hands of one of the 
Godly, who being a Minifbr of the 
Word, exprefs'd a great deal of Zeal in his 
preaching, and Prayer; this got him To 
great an Afceiidant over his Congregation, 
that nothing was to be dcme in any of the 
Families, but the Man of God muft be firft 
coafuifced : No Maid muft have a Husband, 
pr young Fellow a Wife, that he did not 
approve: And whoever couM get into his 
good Grace , was fure never to lofe his 
C^ufe, if within his Jurifdidion. Among 
th^ multitude of his Hearers was a pretty 
young Wortjan, who had about Five Hun- 
dtecj Pounds to her Portion; a Clmrch-maA 
of ,a^ tolerable ^ood Trade had feen her at 
a i^r/eads Houie, ao:d tho' nothing in her 
Fortune ^jsc^u'd- be an obfticle to his Pretea- 

fions; 



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'i)b^ WirPOCRlTE Uncas'd. , S5^ 

fiOfls; yet underftafliduig that nothing was 
to be doiie with the Mother, bvit by tfee 
means of the Mmiftcr, he was if> much in 
Love, that h^ refolv'd to play the Hypcv* 
^.rite with the Hypocrite : He tWefQre prpr 
tends to turn Diflenter, and enter himifelf 
in this very ManViQongregation. jNg ^an 
wa§ riiore a0iduous than he at Jyjorning 
Le^ures, and none feem'd more diligent in 
Writing down the Sermon, tho* ini^feed he 
knew nothing of Short-hand. His exem- 
plw Conduat made him taken notice cjf; 
and the Teachei- hoping fomething from fo 
uncommon a- Zeal, took care tet-come ac-^ 
quainted with him. The young Man was 
glad of the opportunity, an^madehim a 
prefent , which often engag'd his Vifits. 
He being a fwgle Man,; the Man of God 
enqnir*d into*his Cirqumftances, and urg'd 
him to fettle by Marriage ; he feem'd indif- 
ferent till he thought he had fufficiently 
eftablifliM himfelf, and then he propos*d 
the Lady he defuM to have to his Wife; 
Xhe good Man told him he had reafon, to 
hope a greater Fortune, and that if he won'(i 
beruPdbyhimhelhouldhaveone: But he 
perfifting in his Choice, the matter wa& foon 
Brought to an Agreenient ; for his Inter^ 
and Care in Procuring, he was to have One 
hundred Pounds out of the Five. 

The Bargain being made with th^ Teach- 
er, the Hearers were foon determin'4 on the 
matter, the Mother was prevail'd with to 

admit 



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admit him to her Daughter, and the Daugh- 
ter to be r uIM by her ConfefTor and Mother; 
Beflcles the young Man had a very agrees 
able Perfon, and what might engage the 
Heart of any young Woman to love him 
for a Husband. 

' The Marriage is concluded, the Day ap- 
pointed, and the Nuptials celebrated* The 
next Morniiig the Bride put him in mind to 
go to hear the good Man's Sunday Lefture, 
but he eafily found mearis to cool her Zeal 
of the Spirit, by the Application of the 
Flefli. The Mother waited as long as Ihe 
couM for them ; but being impatient, the 
goes away without them* Then the Bride- 
groom and Bride agreed to get up ; but it 
being too late to come into tlie Meeting 
without being taken notice of, he prevaiPd 
. with her to go to the Parifli Church with 
him. Whence returning homC, the Mo- 
ther began a Lecture on their Remifnefs, ia 
not getting up to go to the Meeting ; they 
both aiBrm'd that they had been at Church: 
But the Mother making a further Enquiry, 
the Husband thus fpoke to her : 
* Madam, Tou Are imfos^A on by a grave^ 
fidrt^^d Formality^ which makes you a Property 
to thofe Kjiaves that lead you v^here-ever thej 
pleafe ; / mufi he candid^ I ne^ver %vas of that 
Opinion ; hut having a Paffionate Love for you^ 
Uaughtefy and knowing no ^ther waj of get' 
Ping your Confknt^ I diffembled thus long^ to 
^atn the only -Earthly Haffmefs I de fired ( I 



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a^k HeAven FarJion for ^ Hyfocrifie) T wa^ 
not dxcerSA in my Thoughts^ for your z,edous 
good Minifier fold me your Daughter y and her 
Fortune^ for One iiunJired Founds^ for which 
he has n^ Bond, and which he will come to re^ 
ceive to morrow at Noon. Get you a Friend 
withyou^ and be within hearing, and you /ball 
find, that I have not laid any thing to his 
Charge, but what will ap fear to be true to a 
Tittle^ ' , 

The Mother and Daughter feemM 

ftrangely furprizM> and promised, that if 

he made out this Accufation, that tliey 

wouM both go to the Pariflb Church, ana 

for ever quit the fcperate Congregation. 

^ Th&Monday is corae, and the Man of God 

with.a chearful Countenance is arrival with 

his Stomach fet to a good Dinner, and more 

to the Hundred Pounds. Dinner was paft, 

with the young Married Couples good 

Healths^ and feveral Pious and Godly Dif- 

courfes, till the Cloath being taken away, 

andtheTea pot brought in, the fober i{(i* 

hea went about, when the Mother and 

Daughter pretending Buftnefs to go abroad, 

left the good Man and the Husband to pur* 

fue their Affairs* 

Well, laid the precife Hypocrite, my 
good Friend, how hke you a Married State^ 
and how like you the Wife I have prpc)ir*d 
for:you? Is flie worth the Price you give? Am , 
I worthy my Hire? There is no bbdy liptter 
j4easM, than my felf (faid the young A^n) 
I have got the Woman, whom of all ofiher 
Hh i 



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N 



246 im U O L D E N :) P Y. . ^ 

I lovM, nor4o I think 1 caa ever ^y too 
dear ibr l^r, A good hearing (faia tfae 
Minifter ) a good he^rirrg my Lad ; I hav^ 
generally had very good luck in tte many 
Matches I have made fince the Lord h^ put 
jne into this Vineyard. But I am afraid, 
Sir, ( faid the young Man) you have been 
harder with me tlian any other on this 
Occafion : No, I proteft ( (aid the Hypo- 
crite) on my veracity I never take kfe; 
nor has any one ever fcrupled to give me 
two Hundred wit of a Thoirfand. That 
piay be ( replied tlie other ) but then per- 
haps the Man lias not had aa Equivalent to 
the Lady^s Fortune,, whereas I have in my 
Stocky and a fmall Eftate, ibmething more 
than the whole Five hundred requires. 
Alack-a-day (Tays the Parfon ) I ei^miiiM 
not into tliat, it had been all one to me ; 
youwerfea Godly young Man, and my Inte- 
reft andTrouble was the fame : Weil out Sir 
(interrupted the young Man) conlideriug 
that you have provided well for two of 
your Congregation, it wiU bp fome Repu- 
tation to you; and I fuppofe a fatisfadioa (b 
.gwat, that you will, for the good News 
("fince more than you knew befoie) abate 
oiie half of theSumm. Fie, fieypwig Alan 
^^replied the grave Rogue) how can you of- 
f^)c%\ What I deliver from my Pulpit 1 im- 
partVo you ail aUke for the Contributions 
thafcthey give me j but in this wayof deal- 
ing^ which is nonedf my Spiritualty, lean 
ab|tt€ nothing. 

The 

/ 

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rm hypqck-ite uwcks'd. 25^ 
The yoimg' Man having tried all ifteans 
^0 make liim abate to no purpofc^ he calls 
for his Bond, .which the old FelloW produ* 
x;:es, and while they are reading over, th^ 
Mother and Daugnter, and two Friers 
came in upon them \ the Man of God was 
fb frighted at the fudden aflault of the Mo- 
ther's Tongue which let fly, Rogue, Hypo* 
crite. Villain, and a Tboufand other good 
Morrows in a trice, that he let go the Bond, 
which the Husband took care to Cancel, and 
lay afide. The poor Marriage Broaker wasfo 
jbefct, tliat he wouM have given a Hundred 
Pounds more to have been out of theHoufe: 
But he hop'd it in vain till their fpirits were 
Ipent in Reproaches; but then having affar'd 
him that they wou'd never terd any more 
with Diflenters, but immediately conform, 
he begM them tofmother his difgrace^teHing 
them that the beft Men were fubjeft to frail- 
ties, and that fmce he had a great Family on 
his Hands, he lK)pM a moderate profit for 
the Intereft he had in his Congregation was 
allowable both by the Laws of God and Man. 
He was not therefore folicitous for any 
thing,but that the Enemies of his Way might 
turn It into Ridicule to the prejudice of the 
Saints ; that therefore he remitted the Bond 
to the voungMan, and hopM for his Friicnd- 
Ihip, unce by his means he had obtained fo 
good a Wife, and one that he lov'd* 

The Company was movM with Iu§ Dif* 
courfe^ and promisM to fay no nwre of tfie 
matter, only that he ftiou'd have a care of 

H h 2 fuel! 

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26o Tffe G OLX>u^ S?i. 
fuch fort of dealing ; but if tliat lie wou'd pur- 
fue it,that he fliouM re^rd the good of thofe 
that he joiny, more thin his 6wn Profit, 
fince felfe he might be the Ruin of others, 
only to enrich himfelf. With that they dif- 
mife'd him, who returning home, took his 
Bed for vexation^and viery narrowly efcaping 
his d&ath he revivM, but went on in the feme 
way as long as it was in his Cuftody. 

The Story yon have told ( affum'd the 
Guinea^ carries the Air of fo miKh JFad to 
me vtho have been very Fainiliar among 
them, that I make not theleaft doubt of 
your veracity, but tliis,as the yotmg Peoples 
good Fortune direded, met with a lucky 
Conclufion to both; but what^.I nowlhali 
relate, was far more terrible in the Event. ^ 



THE 

Godly Debochee. 

ISabeUa was .a beautiful young Woman, 
who having but little Fortune but her 
Needle, maintained her felf honeftly and 
genteely by her Work. There was a young 
Mart juft out of his Time with, a Mercer, 
and who^had a good Fortune in Money to kt 
up his Trade^ which,as foon^as he had done, 
he defign'd to Mzxry Ifde/Iay thinking her. 
valuable enough in hcv felf without any Por^ 
tion,^ 3tvell remerabring^ that a good Hpufe? 
..." ' ^ wife. 



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The CiDDLY tIEBOCHBE, 2bl 

wife, and a good Humour^bring Pieaty and 
Happinefs, while the contrary ,with never io 
much, willdeftroy both. Theif Lov^s had 
been of fome duration, and their 4ge§ aear 
the fame, tho' flie had the ftart of him near 
a yeari 

It Was the hard Fortune of poor IJkbe/Uto 
have old Gripe fee Iier at Church, arfdther? 
to fall in Love with herto fuch a degrei^, 
^s to follow her Home, and Sunday not being 
a proper time to begin ^n Affair of that Na- 
ture, efpecially he being a Zealous Brother, 
he put it off till next day; when on enquiry 
he found that llie maintained her ieif by 
plain- work, whicli gave him bothan oppor*- 
funixy of introducing himfelf to her by be* 
fpeaking half a dozen Shirts, and hop^^tbat 
her Neceflities wouM lend an eafie ear to a 
Price for her Maidenhead, whith might put 
her in fbme better way. 

He came to her every day, and everyday 
added new fewel to his Fire j what to do 
he knew not, for he had by this time heard 
of her Engagement.with the young Mercer; ' 
and that cut off all his hopes of fuccefs in a . 
Pafliori, *which he cou'd not, or wou'd i^ot 
vercome.He had no means to make way for 
himfelf but by endeavouring a Rupture be^' 
twixt them ; he therefore found out the Re- 
lations of the young Man, by fome Agent 
which he had, and difcoverM his Intention 
of throwing himfelf and his Fortune away 
pn a Beggar. Tho? no Body cou'd hinder him 
of his prefent Portion, yet he had an Uncle . 
H h 3 who 

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r 

who cou'd leave faim a confidci'ibleEftate; 
and he by this means coming to know his 
defigns^ affurM him he wou'd leave him ne- 
ver a Groat if he proceeded m lb fcandaloiK 
an Amour : He let him underftand, that tho' 
his own Fortune was pretty ponfiderable, 
yet that the greater Kis Stock was, the foon- 
er he couM get an Eftate; and that if he 
were enclinM to Marry he wouM provide 
him a Wife who fhou'd equal his Portion, 
and fettle a Jointure upon her out of his 
Eftate. 

The young Man Was not eafiiy won from 
His Love by the profpefl: of Gain; he in- 
forms her of the Propofal of his Uncle to him; 
but at the fame time aflures her, that he 
wou'd never forikke her for all his Uncfc's 
Eftate an Hundred times told. I//il>e/i/t was a 
little ftruck at the News, |he confider'd that 
this was not an Age to hear Men quit a great 
deal of Money for a meer Form ; and there- 
fore refolvM to be beforehand with her Lo- 
ver, and either have the advantage of lofing 
him handfomly, or binding him fafter. So 
that the next time he came, fhe Jtold him 
that ^ 

She was fenfible of his Paflion, and the 
Advantage of having an Husband of his Cir- 
cumftances, which were far greater thanihe 
couM merit; that fhe returned him a reci- 
procal Kindnefs, and indeed loVM him too 
well to let him be a fufFerer in his FOFfune 
for her fake : That Trading wa« a Lotte^i 
and if he ftiou^d not meet with the fuccefe be 

pro- 

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. The GODLV I>EBAaCHEE-. ^ 

pos'c^ flje wou^ never put it in his.Power 
of reproBchinjg hetf with fcdug the Caufe^ of 
his Ruin by imbbliging hife Relations,, who - 
c«herWife woif d have fet him above the Af-- 
faults of Fortune* She beggM hhn there- 
fore, with Tears in her Eyes, to ftrive to 
forget her, ind place liis Aflfedions oafome 
more fortunate Woman, and mom agrees 
able to his Relations, and his Efkte; 

1 will not pretend to draw the moving 
Scene of tlieir parting thatTimCy he pm- 
cefting inviolable Conttancy ; and fhe afiii- 
tmg him, that-lhe wou^d a^mit namoi^of 
hi&Cburtfliips, till fhe was fe/tisfied that \m 
Relations allow'd his Addrefe. Notwkh- 
ftanding this he wou'd IHII fee her, and re- 
new his profeffibns, till Iws Uncle had now 
found out a Ladjr to his mind : She was the 
Ifeughter of a Nfercer who was dead,> and 
h^fd left her above 2000 / to her Fortime, 
in the Hands of a Guardian who was of 
the Uncles Acquaintance The Matter be-, 
ing naovM, the Conditions were agreed on^ 
and the young People were to be brought 
together by Accident to fee one anotter. 
Bermthia ( for that was her Name) was- 
about Seventeen years of Age , and the 
young Man betwixt one and two and Twen*- 
ty. She was perfe£My Handfom, and ha^ 
ving had a good j^ducation, fet off her Beau^ 
t^ with a Thoufend Graces of Mien and 
A^ddrefs, which were new to the young 
Spark, IfdeHA being only of a plain, un- 
taught, unfopMlticated Nature , deriving 

H h 4 no-^ 

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264 Ibi VjrOI-DEN ^PTi. 

nothing from Art. The Uncle invites hi^ 
Nephew to Dinner, without acquainting 
him with a word of his Defign, left Pre-^ 
poffeffion fhouM create an Averhon; where- 
as feeing a Charming young Lady, without 
knowing that Ihe is- to be imposed on him for 
a Wife, might raiip a Paffibn for her, which 
much more eafily wouM bring the lame 
Matter about. 

The Uncle's Notion was fo juft, that be- 
fore Dinner was over IfabelU was ^uite for-? 
got, the prefent Lady younger by fqur or 
five years^ with all the Bloom of the Plumb, 
with a Genteel and Courtlike Air, adorned 
with Jewels, and fet off with all the Art 
imaginable, ftruck the young Citizen fa 
deeply^ that he couM not but gaze on her 
all the while fbe late at Table. The Uncle 
was very well pleas'd to obferve this Altera- 
tion in his Nephew , but yet refolv'd to. 
make nodifcovery , till he had firft made his 
Application to him; by which te wou'd fo 
far confirm his Love, that he cou'd not re- 
cede, and the Woman he defignM wou\l 
feem the voluntary choice of ii^ Nephew, 
and no Impofition of his. 

The yoiipg Lady.was gay in her Temper, 
and free in her Converfation, and he being 
the youngeft of the Company they foon 
joinM in Converfation ; The old Folks in- 
dulgM it, and withdrew to fmoke a Pipe in 
the next Rooiri^ In fhort this meeting had 
io entirely vanquiih'd the falfe Lover, that 
j|ie, before he went home, made foijie mo- 
tions 

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Ti^^ Godly Debochee. 265! 
tioffs to his Uncle about her ; asking her 
Fortune, Quality and the like : But hearing 
tliat her Portion was fo confiderable, he 
figh'd in defpair. His Uncle askM him the 
Caufe ; he frankly it laft told him, that in 
obedience to him, he had broke off his In*- 
clinationsfrom IJdeSa^ind hopM,that fince 
now he had fixM themon an Objed, which 
he couM find no fault with for want of 
Fortune y that he wou'd make good his 
Word, and enable him tb make his Pretea* 
iion, and AddrelTes to her for a Wife. 

The Uncle cunningly at fit ft raised fome 
difficulties; but at lalt told hirn, that beings 
both his Unple and Ciodfether he wou*d 
fti-etch a Point, and that nothing on, his fide 
ihouM be wanting to fatisfy her Guardian, 
provided he bou'd latisfy her, and win hq? 
Aifefl:k)ns. - .* ^ 

All fchis while IfaMa knew npthing qf the 
Change of her Lover, whom notwithftandi* 
ing her generous difcourfe^fhecouM not find 
in her heart never to think of any mqre. 
In the meanwhile the old Reformer, em^ 
ployM all his Engines to endeavour to cor- 
irupt her with the hopes of an eafie Main- 
tenance, without naming his Name, and 
only fpecifying his Age, and Ciixumftance 
of Riches, and his Love for her : But no 
Argument cbuM prevail to make her give 
ear to the immodeit propofition. This Dif- 
ficulty old Gri^ attributed to her Hopes of 
her Lover ; and therefore fufpended his de- 
fpair till his Marriage was paft, which he 

heard 

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S6ft imi trOLDEK OI^Y. 

heard was very near, before he difcove^^ 
his Infidelity ; left by fceking him out, fhe . 
ihauM lecall him to her Obodience. Bat he^ 
had no need to let ^Abeiln know^ that herLo- 
vcr was Falfe, fmce he had not been to feeher 
for firaie Time. Yet he being now Married, 
old Gripe took care that (be fhoa'd know, 
tlKit all her hopes were gonof chat Na- 
ture iinee now he was , another Woman's ' 
Jiusband. 

The Concern with which Ihe received tite 
Neys is not to be exprefeM, yet fl» t«)fc 
care todifoover as little as polfibb to tinPer- 
fon who brought her the imdl^ence ; yet 
cott'd Ihe not conceal fuch fymptoms, as be^ ' 
tray'd an Agony of Mind much more than 
appear'd* When her Faffion was vtmoA^ 
2tfid fhe had a }kx^ recovered her i^y flie 
refolv'd to Write him an upbraiding Lettser, 
wl^ch Ihe did to this purpofe:— — -r 

Tow CtmiuSi has been fa eMntoriinMry in 
lki$ Jffsiry thtt th(? I refoh^d mver to think 
of you mofty yet I mufi Ao wha$ pu woa^JL not ^ 
da by me^ fendyau this FarefHlL I was alw/^s 
finale thst lAever was a frafer Match for yau^ 
cr^ was Mifirejs of Charms fuffktent 7o fecmre 
^yaurHart'y but then ti had been more generom 
andjuji inyouy either never to hofve Vowedj or 
at leap to have keft yomr Vovps : But you are a 
Many and I ought never to have ex^eBed any 
thing elfe at your Hands* Tet fince perhaps 
fame Curfe may hang over you for your Perjuries 
to me J in confideration of the poor Lady you 
have- Marriedy I Cancel all Obligations of that: 

Naturey 

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im fjrODlY JiF£BOCR£Et 267 

i^atmii dnd. frsy thit Hsaftm^ m^y as atftlj 

^ The Mercer rcceivMthis Letter not witli. 
out ibme fting of Confdencc fijr what h^ 
paft, %xiA a new defire oC feeing her, and 
deflgn if be could^ to make her his Mifhe% 
lince oow he cou'd not his Wife ;■ he came to 
her, fwore a Tlwufand Oaths that he lov^d 
her ftill more than ever ; That what he had 
done^i was only to aiable him to do more 
for her than hii tranfitwy Fortune -wouM 
have done by a meer dependance on Trade^ 
She minded not what he iaid^ but defir^d 
him never to come near her more, and not 
to think of being as un^uft to &is Wifba&he 
had been to her ; but as Ihe was a fine^ Wo* 
man, had brought him a largePortion, and 
was yoimg, he^ fbou^d keep his Af&^ions 
for her, left he ftiou'd teach ber to alienate 
heis from him, and place them on one fhe 
might think more defervmg. 

He wou'd HOC be denied^and prefe'd,.eve* 
rytimehecame, his Love, and its fatisfafti- 
on, till Ihe forbid him her Lodging, and 
wouM not fee him whenever became- How-* 
ever he often watchM lier going out, and 
wouM purfue her where-evcr fhe went;: 
wouM watch her Return, and wait on her 
home, and with great difficulty repulsM the 
entrance of her Lodging. Thi? ^ve old Grife 
the villainous thought how to compafs his 
Ends, tho^ by a way, tlmt the Wicked cou'd 
j;wver have entertain^. 

He 

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He had obfervM, one Night, as flbewas 
returning home, and her Mercer in Ibight 
of her Teeth ftiU purfuing her, the Reform- 
ers ( being* f^t on it bjr old Gripe ) feize her 
as a Night-walker, and carrying them both 
before, a . Juftice, flie was feat to Bridetpell 
for being in a Married Man^s Company : 
But the Matter the next day being examiqM 
into, and the Mo-cer appearing, Ihewasfet 
at Liberty, But how innocent foever a 
Woman be, the very Name of Bridewell Aoe^ 
her a Prejudice ;* and this comii\g tolpread 
(by the ijiduftry of old Grife ) about the 
NeighbourlK>od, the poor young Woman 
was fain to leave the Place, and lole moft 
of her Bufinefs. 

Grife in this diftrefs reiKWs his AddrejQfes, 
proffers her Money, nay (which is extraor- 
dinary ) left a; Guinea on the Table when he 
went away, and which iDhe found not till 
the next day* He finding her obftinate a- 
gainft all his unlawful Propofals, oiFers to 
Marry her ; ahd {he willing to be fo well 
provided for, then liftned a little rtore pa- 
tiently to . his Pretcnfions., She therefore 
enquired a little more narrowly after him, 
and to her great mortification found, that 
he was already a Married Man. , Having 
therefore fufficiently reproached him, forbid 
hinl her Houfe. All this couM neither allay 
his Paflion, or his Refolution of fatisfying- 
it one way or other: He therefore fets one 
of the Informers to dog her out when fliQ 
went in the Evening to carry home her 

; ^ Work, 

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fLY i/EBOCHEE, ^0^ 

Work, afld by one means or other to fend 
her to Bridewell once more* The poor Girl 
comiag^ home, was folio wM by this i?^(?r/»^r^ 
or IfdormiT^ who wouM needs pick her up, 
but flie always refiifing him, he at Uft told 
her,: he wouM not part with her till he had 
drank with her; fo fhe ventured to fit down 
at ah -Ale^houfe door in the Street on a 
Bench by him, and had no Iboner drank to 
pledge him^ but fhe was again taken up by 
theuang, andfent away xoWtAmeU. She 
knew not what to do, nor whom to fend 
to^ when old.'Gr//^ pretending only to look 
at* the Unfoitunate Wenches, and to fc6 
which was worthy his Compaffion, found 
her there aiM immediate!;^ milM her out, 
S](ie couM not biu: in Gratitude go to the 
Tavern with him, where he had placM ano- 
ther Woman, who was to draw her iintb 
drink ; and perhaps by mingling fomethihg 
in her Liquor,, intoxicate her to the laft de;- 
gree. ^ . 

This horrid Plot was put in Execution, 
fo tl^t the poor Girl was carried in a Coach 
Drunk to a place agreed on,and put into Bed, 
to whom the old Letcl^r was foon ad- 
mitted, where he did what he pleasM, 
Drink having quite rob'd her of all power 
of refiftibg* 

The Morning came on, and Ihe coming 
to her felf found, firft that {he was not in her 
own Bed, and fpeedily drawing the Cour- 
tain found the old FeUow by her fide now 

aileep, 



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2.79 ■"'* KfU-LDg.n OPY. 

aflecp, and tired with Jjis Nights Villainy. 
^e gave fuch a Scream that Iooq raisM tbc 
old Rogue, and flying at him bad very sear 
(brotled him ; The Noife brought in the 
Bawd, and fome affiftaace, who took her 
a.way from him.; but fofbruisM with her 
Knees and Hands, that he was fcarce able 
to ^et home; whei-e he languilli-d a little 
while and died. The poor youn^ Woman 
found worfe, for being a Utdecome to her 
ieif got out gS the Houfe, y/ith a Refelution 
of having all the Aftors in this Villainy 
ievcrely punifh'd; but her Rage andCon- 
<^n was fuph, that it : threw her into a 
Fcaver, and that into a Deiirhim, in^Wch 
file GontinuM till {he died. And this was 
ithefital end of our Godly Dehoshee. 

The Night waft^ a-pace, fo I will on- 
ly give you a very fhort Account, How 
Vivos Inwrmtrs, and their Jottrayman Ju- 
ftke were met with,, by one who knew 
how to manage them : For confident of 
their Power as Refornaers', they often Tranf- 
grefi the Law without beii^ taken notice 
of. - . . 



THE 



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-THE" 

Rdbrmer Rcform'd. 

IBelongM to an honeft <imt\em3La of 
the City, who one Suadaj/had Bufinds 
at die other end of the Town, fo fcfol- 
ving to take a walk into the FieUb, hs 
prevaiiM with two Priends moj?e to .g^ 
alpag with him ; when they came fl^r ' 
to the Race , there was a CoiSbe-hou^ 
where ite dcfir'd his Fiiehds W.0:af 
white he flept a door, or two ^tther, 
to fpeak a few Words with the Feafo* 
he had Buiinefs with. Oiunoh wa( 
done when ^jiw.went into the Coffee- 
houfcj where they found only two Wo- 
men, whom they askM for. fome Coffee, 
they replied they had none ; fcr fom* 
Thea , and the fame was tbfi Anfwer^. 
In fbort , nothing elfe being to be 
had, th^ bid them bring Half a Quarr 
tern of Brandy , inftead of which the 
Impudent Baggage -brings a whole Qjiar^ 
tern , but drinks fijlt her fdf, and 
leaves them not half ; the Meafure 
being adapted to the Place. Wluk 
they were arguing on this Head , In. 
comes a Reforming Conftable with his 
Oangj and feizes th«ni for being in 

a Bawdy- 

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a Bawdy-houfe. They perceivM that they 
Vere grave Citizens, and fo hop'd to 
make them bleed a little freely , rather 
than be exposM as taken up in a Bawdy- 
hcaifci Thp Whdres they were for tag- 
ging them to make it up , and not go 
before the Juftice ; and one of them more 
timerous than the mother gave a willing 
Ear to ,thc Propofal ;, but the Friend com- 
ings in the Interim he examinM into the 
Matter : The ConftaBle told Ijim they had 
found them Drinking with thofe Whoriss 
in a pubhck Bawdy-houfe. How ! fays 
my Mafter, do you know that they are 
Whores, and this a pubhck Bawdy-houfe? 
TJtey replied yes. Then laid my Mafter^ 
I Command you to take them with us 
before the Juftice; for before him we will 
go; and do it ^t your peril. / 

The Whores^ and the Conftable did all 
they c&uM to perfuade \ them not to ex-* 
pofe themfelves ; nay, wou'd at lafl: have 
difmifs'd them without a Farthing. > No, 
tio , faid my Mafter, we are too well 
known in the City to fear being ex- 
posM in fuch a piece of Roguery as 
this : And I will fpend Five Hundred 
Pounds but that I will drive it fo for to 
make you all afham'd of it. 



Ja 



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. the €r O L D K N S P Y. 27 J 

lafhort^ he obliged the Gonfhbles to 
t^e tbefe Ladk&of Pkaiure with them, and 
go all before the next Juftice, who ha^ 
penM to Hve ia the Neighbourhood, When 
th^y can);? there, the Conftables made a 
plaufifcle Story of their beiflg taken in. a 
knowi Bawdy-houfe, and wkh knowa 
Whores : The Juftice, with a very formal 
ftipercilious Look, addrefi^d himfeir to them. 
(5f/wAs?w^/r, / am forty to find Men of your 
S^in^ipg^ GM4'vityj to he cAught in the Comfdnj^ 
^f^mLmd Womeny and in d Houfe fo No^ 
torio^s as that w hire you were taken. Sir^ faid 
Biy Mafter,^ do you know that to he a Bawdy- 
iimfir ^^^ ^hefe Women. Whores ? The Ju- 
ftice replying in the Affirmative, Why then^ 
j^fued he, hotv tomes it tha^. you y who are jk 
MAgifirate'yi fkffer ftah a^ Houfe to keef ofe9$ 
thetr Doors J on furpofe to betray the Innocent 
'Wtofnch a Fremunire as my Friend and lam 
fallen into^ mho n^enf in there to re/i^ and did 
J^othif^ Vndecfinty nor knew any thing of the 
jnjittex. Since threforey Sir^ you knm this^ 
. and yet fufff^i(*d if und^nyour Nofe^ I defire we 
Play be a^lTbwnd over toth^ SeJfioHs. Iwi/lfe^d^ 
Siry for Ten Thoufand l^ound Bail, atfd I wii 
ffmdfom^ Money y Sir to have;you and your Con^ 
jiables made anEoaamfleyfor layingTrn^s forHet 
M'fj^J^y^s J^iege J^epphy apd maktng thofe a Srey 
iffM,want either Money orI(jfowledge to deal witk 
you JLS they m^ht. Tou have this time mi^ 
jlakfn jotit Men^ we axe above your doing us 
^y Jtiarm^ and \ve^ ^^ Able to do you "Jttfiice. 

I i The 



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f 74 T/^GoddenSpy. ^ 

The Magiftrate found liimfelf in the wfong 
Box, andbegaato mollify the matter, per- 
iwadii^ them to make it up, that it might 
be fome RefleQion upon them, and the 
like good Advice. But they perfifted fo 
earnefliy in being all bound over, that the 
jufticetold them they might, if they pica- 
fed, go about their Bufinefs, for be bad 
nothing to fay to them. Then faid my 
Mailer, I have this to fay to you, that if I 
find this Sign up and Houie open the next 
time I come this way, I will, take care of 
your Worfhip and your Commiffion. 

With thefe words they parted, the Con- 
ftables asking them a Thoufand Pardons, 
and cxcufed themfelves by theu- want of 
knowing them, or they fhould not have 
given them this Trouble, and fuch a lame 
come ofF^ 

In a few Days after my Mafter went that 
way again, on purpofe to fee if all wa* 
performed, and be round the Sign remov- 
ed, aijd the Doors all faft, for they per- 
ceivM that they were fo much in the 
wrong, that to ftand againft him, wouM 
have brought Matters , fo on the Stage, 
that might very much have funk their 
Markets. 

All that I fhall obferve from wimt has 
this Night been faid is, That you ought 
to be very much on your Guard, when 
you have to do with a Man that pretends 
to more Holinefs than his Neighbours. 

Thefe 



dbyGoogk 



The GoLDnu Spy, 275 

There is fuch a Leven of the Fharifee in 
all thofe fort of Men, that you cannot fin a- 
gainft Charity when you defcribe them Aicb, 
fince the Pifture is fo like the Original, that 
'tis iin|Jpflible to Affront them. 

The GaimA here endings and the Night 
.being pretty well advanced, when I came 
Home, I turn'd my fclf to reft, prayings 
as from fuddain Death and deadly Sin^ like- 
wife to be deliverM from Reformers and 
Informers. 



THE 

Sixth IJigMs Entertainment, of 
Peace and War , or^ the 
Trade of the Camp. 

I Got up in the Morning, and takiiig a 
Walk in the Fields, refloaed oii the 
ftrange depravity of Mankind, that left no- 
thing unattempted with his corrupt Pra- 
£tices. . Religion, the moft Sacred Tye of 
Humane Society, I found by my laftNight's 
Converfation,was, even in the*pureft Coun- 
try, made often a Silking. Horle to Private 
Intereft and Sinifter Defigns.. Tho' this 
indeed is a ftronger Proof of its Excel- 
lence, and only an Evidence of the Ex- 
traordinary Wretchednefs of Mankind. Nof 
tJid this put me out of Conceit with the 

li 2 prefcnt 



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zjS The Golden S f t, or^ 

prefcnt Age, becaufe I found in my Books, 
that the fame abominable Vicioufneis was 
cbargM by the Writers of former Ages on 
the Wickednefs in their Times. Indiisas 
well as othtr Emergencies of the World, I 
couM never find any great Variety ; Men 
were always the fame in their Defires, in. 
\heir Sins, in their Follies, and not very 
different in their Knowledge ; if one Age: 
loft it, the fucceeding ones revived it, aiid 
tho* with little variation from what it Was 
before, yet the Reviver has challenged: jhe 
lH[onT)ur of the Difcovery. This holdj' in 
moftofour Modern Pbilofophical Notions. 
So in every Age Noblemen, Ufurers, Tra- 
ders and Soldiers have defired Money itetfc. 
tihan Fame ; fome few Wife Men have va* 
lued Honefty, while the .greateft Knaves 
praifeit; and thofe who moft cry^ it'up, 
do leaft for it in Diftrefs. Courtiers al- 
ways valu'd themfelves more than the Pubi 
lick or their. Prince; States- men coloured 
Self.Interelt under Ptt^//ri& Good: Fricftsal- 
ways firft purfued the Goods of this World, 
themfelves more, than they preach/d the 
Goods of the other World to others ; never 
forgave their •Oppofers, and endeavoured 
by their Praftice to undermine the Belief 
which they taught^ Contrary Parties were 
always Knaves and Fook to each other; 
while the Leaders of both might challenge 
the^firft Title in Reality, and all the Follow- 
crs the latter. Pedants always would at. 

fume 



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th T K A D E of tie C AM?. zjy 

fume the Name of Men of Letters, and 
Poetafters palm themfelves oa this Senfclcfs 
Town and Quality for Poets. Mm always^ 
as well as now, talkM as they woiild have 
it, and Peace and .War became the SubjeO: 
of common DifcouiTe, as Men grew wea- 
ry of War or Peace. 

Full of thefe Reflexions I return'd to the 
Town, to refrefh my felf and meet 
Company to dine wifb, I went to thcf 
Coffee- Houfe, where I found a fort of a 
Jdciy or diffident Pwnacler^ in deep Debate 
with a Whig of thte New Cut about the 
Peace. This juftifyM my laft Refleaion, 
' and will be plain from what follows. Says 
the fir ft, Had not the Aft forbid it, I would 
lay any Man Ten to One, that we have np 
Peace before Michaelmafs. Whoo / we love 
to run down our Enemies, and inake no-^ 
thing of them ; but 'tis a fooUfh Method, 
for if they are in fo woful and deplorable a 
Condition,what need Ve attend their Terms? 
Why don't we march into their Country 
with an irrefiftibic Army, fudi as we pre* 
tend to have, of above i6o Thoufand Men^ 
Veteran, Noble, Gallant Fellows, weU fed, 
well Cloathed, well paid? What can op- 
pofe them in a Country, that is ftarving^ 
an Army without Men, and Men without 
Hearts, Cloaths, Money, or any thing ne- 
cefTary for Defence-? Who fly before wc 
come near them, and can no more m^ke a 
ftand againft us, than a drunken Old Fei^ 
'\ li j; .low 



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'^7^ ^^^ Golden Spy. or^ 
low againft a Brigade of Conftables and 
Watch- men ? How can the Frer^ch Monarch 
pretend to. Capitulate on any Terms, but 
to furrender Prifoner of War ? Or why don^t 
we ferve him as he did .the Doge of Gemdy 
make him come with a Halter about Iiis 
Neck and beg our Pardon, and fubmit to 
our Clemency? 'Till I fee thefe things 
done, for my part. I ihall not believe, riiat 
the French are fo*damnably reducM, or 
that there is any likelihood of a Peace. 

Sir, faid the New Cuty you are a little too 
Hot, PoKticians fufFer the Under-fpurs of 
the News- WriterSjto magnify the (ad Condi- 
tion of Frxnce^ to give our own People Heart 
to hold on the War 'till we can get anHooou- 
rable Peace \ but for my part I muft deal inge- 
nuoufly with you, I am far from imagining 
the jFr^wi& Affairs in fodefperate a State; this 
King is a Wife, a Great,a PowerfulPrincc,and 
he would never let the Prince of the Afiu- 
ria^s be acknowledged* by the Cortezy cr the 
States of the Country, had he found that he 
muft fo fbon be obliged to difemboguetbe 
whole Spanish Monarchy. For my part, I 
could wifh, for the good of Europe^ that he 
were as low as he is reprefented ; tho* on 
the other hand I muft tefl you, that I Aq 
not think it is the common Intereft to pull 
him down too low ; for Europe has been in 
dangeronce already, from the Power of the 
Houfe of AufirUy and fhould the Empire, 
and the Spnt^h Monarchy be join'd again, I 
' • ' knoMT 



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the Tkat>E of the C\m?. tj^ 

fcnow not but there would be a Neceflity of 
a Confederacy againft that Exorbitant Pow- 
-er. Come, come, we are never fatisfy'd, wc 
railM at poor King WiSiam on the Treaty 
of Partition, and yet I can fee no means of 
Teftoring Peace td us all, but a Treaty ojfi 
^hat Foot* Befides, I muft tell you, that ^ 
tho' the Dutch are our Good Confederates * 
and Allies at prefent, yet I do not think it 
.good Policy ,to have them entirely fecure 
on the Terra Firma^ for Ihould tliey be fo, 
I know not what Defigns they may form 
againft Great Britain^ that is their Rival in 
Trade* Oh ! Gentlemen, there are a great 
many things to be confider'd in Af- 
fairs of this Important Nature, and Things 
that do not fall into every Man's Capacity 
to think of; under the Role, we have a great 
many Bufie, Noify, Grumbling Fellows, 
who, were they intirely out of Fear, might 
play the Devil for God's fake. No Man 
wouM be fecure. The Clamours againft 
great: Men are, alas ! generally but too Po- 
pular, and fince great Men are but Men^ 
they can't but give (chro' Inadvertence or 
Folly) ferae Handle for Malice to take 
hold of, and when Men make a Noife for 
the Publick Good, how eagerly is all they 
fay fwallow'd down for perfeQ GofpeL A- 
nother thing is to be confider'd, onxHotffurs 
are for haying the French King to deliver 
up the Spamib Monarchy as a Preliminary. 
Lack-a-day, Sir, that is a perfeft Jeft ; 'tis 

li 4 not 



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Abo l^r\f OVl>E^ »PY,^^ 

not in his Powcr^ Sir^ to give »ij> tbatMo- 
rarchy; 'ris in his Grand- fon's Han^^and 
none but he and the Spdmsrds tbemfelytf 
can do that. What ^ould you have us to 
do then ? Why if the Fremh JKing will 'give 
you PafTage throMh his Country to drive 
dis Grand- fon out oiSpain^ then while Prince 
£/5rg^w,with an Army of goodCathoKcks,docs 
that Work, our own Men may be brought 
into EngUnd^ and while thev are on fool, 
rfiey may be ready to Sail eitner to jHbUml 
or ^painj as occafion requires^ and in tlic 
mcjin while tliey will keep the Grumblers 
in Awe. In fhort we were IqllM afleep too 
long by the enervate Reign of King ChAtlts 
the 2d. when he got up to fuch a Fower a5 
to be an Over-Match for all Europe bcfidcs, 
'Tis very well that we have bangM hito tiH 
bis Sides Ake, and made him glad to feek 
a peace, which, I think we may be willing 
to accept on cafier Terqis thanfome Mee 
propofe, who are carry'd away )by I 
Know not what fort of Enjthufiaftick Zeal, 
that is only founded on Fancy. If he reco- 
vers by a Peace, why, fo fhall we; whafs 
Sauce for the Goofe is Sauce for the Gan- 
der. 

There fat by thele Learned Difputants 
an Old H^higy whofe Colour went and came 
Twe^ity times, whilft thefe Worthy Knights 
were fettling the Affairs of Europe on a Se- 
cure Foundation. Atlaft, taking up A^y 
C^ty Sir, faid he, I know not M^iat W 

call 



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thi TVLAVM.icflheC AUV. ^ti 

caSi^fony 'for you taik more like an Bngioe 
^ frdme^ than an E^UjbmM^ 1 thiok 
whiM you have !0iid ammtnts ik) litck le& 
^dian Treafoii, ^t leaft againft the Intnercli 
of all the H^h Allies^ as well as our own 
j^Iation. What, Sir^ to kfinuate fo great a 
Libel againft the Bravery of our Generals, 
die Courage of our Soldiers, amd the Ho- 
nour of our Stacefmen, after the prodigi- 
ous Expence of fo much Blood and Riches 
for the carrying on of this War ; and fince 
Heaven has Bleffcd HerMajefty's Arras with 
fuch Miraculous Succefs, tiiat Hiftory ra:n't 
Parallel ; when the Frmch have been beaten 
every where, their Armies deftroy'd, their 
Charf Towns plundrcd, their Country laid 
Wafte by the Hand of Heaven, and their 
Frince> Cruelty, by forcing above two Mil- 
lions of Induftrious People out of his Coun- 
try for Religion, whofe Hands would now 
have Cultivated his Fields and fhut out Fa- 
mine, that is now entred tfieir Dominions ; 
after all this. Sir, to obtain a Peace that will 
leave us worfe than the War found us !' 
: The bare Surrender of the Spamfb Monar- 
chy, good Sir, fcts us not where we were . 
betore tlie War ; becaufe* it is brought 
much Lower, lefs capable of Defence, and 
mOre lyable to be ScizM than ever. T{>c 
fame may ibe faid of the Netherlands^ clio' 
not in fo great a Degreq So that there is a 
Ncccfficy cxl making them Refund Burgtm^ 
djfy Aljacey and FrAmhe'Ccmre-y to leiGfen.thc 

Number 



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iXn The G o LD E N S p Y, orl 

Number of their Ships, and not be.fttf&r'd 
to appear on the Ocean with a Ship above 
50 Guns ; to Surrender Nen?fou»dlM^^ their 
Claim to part of St. Chriftofhers ; tt) Dc- 
moliih Mdrtemcoy and Dunkirk \ to ^t 
up Catice ^ and to disband his Army. As 
for reftorin^ the Power of Pariiamems, 
I have notmng to fay to it; for I am (^ 
Opinion, that to make ifrdnce more Terri- 
ble to Eurofe than ever, make it perfeQIy 
Free ; in their Slavery their Spirit is qualhM 
and yet by a Politick Prince , you fee 
what they have done ; but then indeed bad 
Succefs makes all their Glory moulder away 
much fwiftcr than it rofe. 

Tho' I am not fond of Difcourfes of this 
Nature in a Coffee- Houfe, yet, Sir, lean- 
not hear fuch Defigns infinuated againft my 
Country , without taking notice of them. 
You were finely preparing a Way for a Standi 
ing Army, by your Peace and no Peace; 
but I had rather fee you, and all your Party 
Hang'dy than ever fee that fettled again in 
England. What was the Effed of it in 0. 
liver\ Time , Slavery firft, and then Con- 
, fufion of Changes. No, Sir, were your Li* 
bel true againft the Managers of our Afl&irs, 
yet give me leave to tell you. That there are 
ikfer ways of Defending our Laws apd Li- 
berties, than by a Standing Army. Since 
the Parliament denyM it to the Beft of Kings, 
I dare believe the Beft of Queens ^YiU n^^^^ 
fcekit. :f' ' 

While 



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tht T^hDEof the C A M pI 28^ 

While thcfe Gentlemen were thus hotly 
.diicourling the Matter, there fat by them a 
Jolly fort of a Man, who feem^d one of 
thole who meddled not with Parties, who 
when the Matter grew High , interpofed 
his Pkafant Face. 

Gentlemen, faid he, for my part, I am 
one of thofc Happy Fellows who never exa- 
mir^ into the Secret Motions of Government, 
nor enquire how fuch or fuch a thing is to 
be .brought about. AH my care is to have 
the Blemng of Peace, while you Statefmen,' 
you Wife Politicians contrive to give it me. 
I confefs I love both Peace and War , but 
for feveral, I mean different, Reafons. War 
carrieis away abundance of Scoundrels that 
ufe4 to infeft the Town , and difturb our 
Fleafures in the time of Peace ; but then on 
the other fide, it carries oflF a great many 
Honeft Fellows too : It is a great promoter 
of Sobriety ; but then it is becaufe it makes 
Drunkennefs too Expenfive: It drains the 
Corrupt Humours of a Nation, by a feafo- 
ti^hkPhMotowy ; but then for want of Skill 
it lets out a great deal of good Blood with 
them. It gives us Glorious vidories,but then 
the deuce on't is, that it Riiins our Trade* 
It raifes abundance of Brave Fellows to be 
known in the World, who elfe had never 
been heard of; but then a great many hun- 
dreds find other Arts to Live by in the very 
Camp, than by the Sword ; and who maka 

fuch 



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^S4 ' The Golden S'^p y/ e?r, 
fuch a Figure in the World, that they had 
better never have beai heard of, for Ae 
Honour of thofe who Raifed them, and the 
Dignity they bear. In fhort, when I think 
on the Balance, War is not fo much to be ad- 
mired, as it once appearM to be. But then • 
for Peace , no Body can find fault with it 
but the Soldiers— —but then we have ftopt 
their Mouths, with Half Pay, and no Bro- 
ken Bones. The Trader Rejoyces in it, for 
the Privateers fright his Sleep nq*more a- 
way from him , and he lias no Hazard but 
the Rocks and the Sands, much more Mer- 
ciful than French Privateers. The Young 
Girls they are glad of it ; for, they hope now 
that they may no longer ftick a Hand ; their 
Sweet- Hearts will not be ravifhM from their 
Arms.. The Good Fellow is pleafed with 
Peace, for then Wine will come Cheaper, 
and the Vintners will not need to R*ew it 
at that abominable rate , they do now. 
The Lawyer will Rejoyce at a Peace , be- 
caufe according to the Old Proverb, Peace 
brings Plenty, and Pleiuy Litigioufnefs, 
and Litigioufncfs fills Wejimihjter Hall, 
which has had almoft a tbng Vacation ever ^ 
fmce the War, while Boys whipt their Tops 
about the Hall in MichAetmh Term. The 
Parfons will like Peace, for there will be 
more Marriages, Chriftcnings, and Burials, 
befides they have too great an Intereft in 
the Plenty of good Wine , and want that 
Confideration of .their Satisfaftion in a 

Wan 



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ttje X RA^PK^ W9 VAMP. 2^f. 

>R^». The ftiyftffs wUl bo Hkewife over-. 
}oy^A at a P^ce, for then they may have z 
lull Gaf^of then* Lubberly Followers with-> 
out any fear of being prefs'd to harder Ser-> 
vice, either at Land or Sra. Tho' I aoi a£- 
fraid that all would not be PleasM ev'n witfi 
aFeace; ^w^ifcj would be much abated, which 
would be a Mortal Blow to S^ock-Jobbing^ ; 
Thofe who have Places in the Taxes would 
be in fear of paying off the Publick Debts 
by a Peace^ and then they ihould have tte^ 
Ik^rtune to feek There may be others |wr-^ 
haps of dbieir Mind who got Money by War^ 
But 'tis now time to fettle; evepj Mm for 
himjelfy snd God for us all. 

Thus you fee Gentlemen, how many 
would be pleasM with Peace, fo I beg you 
let us have it , that we may all (it quietly 
luukr our own Vine , lau^ away thbe, 
livelong Day, have muchjoy, and little, tho* 
fi>und. Slumbers, Friends, Wine, and Wo- 
men, without cootrouL And which way* 
focver you compafs it, 'tis nota Half Ffenay 
matter. 

When he badfaid this he tookbis'Leave^' 
and the Grave Coxcombs confounded, paid 
♦ their Difhes, and went oiF; when I, meet- 
ii^ at kft with my Friend, adjournM to the 
Tavern, where we fpent the Day as plenti* 
fully as if it had been Peace already. 

But the Evening being come, I went 
Home in pretty good Order, and retired to 



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my Foft of Audience. And the I^fpiiei^ 
of the Day, having fixt the War and Peace 
£> much in my Mind I determined this Night 
to have fbme few Words about the CMif , 
where the Fate of Peace and War" is deci- 
ded. 

' When I had propofed the Subjcfl: ; Eor 
my part, faid the UamAn Crown, I cannot 
pretend to fay much of a Subjed lb War- 
like ; at Rome we have no FubmrnA BeS$y tho' 
we have fometimes a noife about the Ful- 
mina Cathedra. Ours is a SfiritudWArf^e^ 
and the Stratagems and Arms^ we ufe , are 
proportioned to the End of our Defigns. For 
your Great Guns, we have our Canons, and 
our Ordindnces for your Ordj^ance ; few Fire 
and Sword, we have Bell, Book, and Can- 
dle ; for your Plunder, we have our Indul* 
gences, and P^/fr-Pence. But tbra, where- 
as the Sfiritual War Deals in Immortali- 
ty," it is Immortal, and never Ceafes, the 
'Devil f^ts hard on one fide, the Pope on 
the other. The Dfevil finds Temptations 
and Decoys People to Sin , in order to 
Damn Ihem, but then out comes the Pope 
with Indulgences J Agnus De'Cs^ and the like 
Ammunition, and for a very little Money 
makes the Sinners Souls reSlas inxurU ; the 
more they Sin, the more he gives IndulgM- 
ces , and the Trade goes on without cea- 
fing ; the Devil's ne'er weary of Tempting, 
the Romans of Sinning , nor the Pope of 
Pardoning ^ the more the Deyil SCempts , 
, ~ ~ " • the 



dbyGoogk 



%h0 more the J^o/ff^im/Stn^ tKe more the Pbpe 
Pardons; (b the Devil adds Temptation to 
Tem|fta tion, die Romans Sin to Sin, and this 
Pope Pardon to Pardon : And yet the Devil 
never gives over tiU Death, nor the RomMs 
in Sinning, but then comes in the Pope, hf 
a pknary Indulgence, a Scapular, or a St; 
Francis^sCovdy and whips the Roman Souls 
out of the Devil's Hands, and fends them 
directly to Heaven. 

This is tte State of out Spiritual Warfare, 
where the Oppofites being Immortal, and 
the Ammunition Imaginary, theConteft is 
Perpetual, in which every one gets but die 
' Devil : For die Romans get Pkafant Sins , 
and the Pope gets their Money for his Par- 
<lons ; but for yx)ur Wars of this World, I 
Icave^ an Account of th^m to my worthy 
good Brethren, who have been more Con- 
verfant about them. 

Her^ the Roman Crown closing bis Dif- 
courfe, my little Louis D'^or. thus began^ 
Sir, I think my fclf the propei-cft piece c^ 
GoM of this Company, to fatisfy your Cu- 
riofity in your Enquiries of this Nature, be- 
caufe I having belongM to the Grand Mo^ 
marehy know more Secrets of this kind, than 
the Cabinet Council it felf, or all the Gene, 
rals of the Armies of France. For I may 
^iTure you, that all the fucceisful Campaigns 
that Lewis has formerly had, tho^ he Chal« 
lei^e the Glory, we had the principal fbaro 
in acquiring them* I coniieis, that we are 

not 



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qoc dbo ooly laftnunaiits of ohtaimi]^^ ' 
Vidory, k mufl: he ioifeed ailow'cl that be 
has odieir Troops appear ia the AQiiin*, Itot 
we diac work IavifiUy>, are the inaiii Bc- 
gtnes that da the work Eflfca«*tt«. .Jhfi 
Troops of the Houiidkl fldCWr'4 mm^x^ 
with ihe Name of the iw^w^ ^tho' 6p«3 
beaten into a fenfe of the AcJulatioiiJi haxe 
but the Pompous Tide* whitfl it h^ oaly- we 
who have the true Poll of H<a»Ottif^ ^n4 m 
indeed the true Troc^ o£ the HGwfljpld, 
and deferve the Nafae> if flot c^ tA^ hfvkh 
sihUy at.lcaft of the Jrr^Jifiibli ; for we m^ 
the firft, and themoft uFe^nal Attack, ^e 
bear the King's linage^ aod Carry with usi a 
greater Awe, and ftrike a deeper Terrof , 
than tbofe who only wear bis Live? ies. We 
have always Coaquer'd, i»y, whote Aimifis 
have laid down tl^ir Arms ajt our Approa<:b« 
No Fort y no Ramparts y no Butwȣk$ or 
Walls, but fall down like tbofe of J^richoy 
.when we go in Proceflioa about thej:n,.*c4 
at Jaft pafs Triumphant in without a Bre^h. 
Wh&x we ffMTing the Mii^^ the Fortrefs is 
no longer Tenible. 

I muft ingenuoufly Coofefe, ^hat we have 
net been fo Succefefiii in the open Fi^ld, as 
in Sieges and Blockades; aivi yet I imf 
venture to Aflert , that we. iMfVel donp 
very confiderable Services, eitb^ in by- 
afling the oppofite General, retardiflg to 
Marches, or putting a ftop to the Purf«ili 
when yiftory was theirs, and ^urs^c^ IP 



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'Hyl Frdm all which, our Titles to Valour 

: find CcftuSuft call by hom'eafis be difputed, 
fw6 Qualkifes of fo great value in a Gene- 
f al ; nay, we* may likewiie pretend to the 
Honourable Apellation of generous Ene- 
rtlies^ fincfe we never Died any Blodd in the 

'^iisldj nor take any City or Fortrels by 
Korm. 

Fifft wt ap^kr before it, arid !ct the E- 
ftemy take a view Of our Strdngth*&nd our 
Nurftfeers, then we fummon them tO Sur- 
render, whkh if they refufe, the PoKfick 
King draws frefti Troops out of his Garri- 
fons^ (that is, out of his Coffers) and this 
never fails to make thfe mOft Impregnable 

-iFortificatioHs fall into his Hands. 

Thus LeWil k Grand has pdffefsM himfelf 
dt To many confiderable Towns and Cities 
itt fo little a fpace of time hi the Franche-^ 
Conte^ Flanders^ and the reft of the Spanifi^ 
NttherUnds^ and at one fatal junSure, 
thtougbout all Holland^ thip an Accident 
jrevertted keeping them. And yet thfe 
Dutch Fear and Re\^ei^nce him more for 
their own fakes thin his, becaufe every 
Branch of their Trade with France^ proves 
Profitable to them; Our Attacks have al- 
ways provM Very fuccefsful in the Empire^ 
where Cities and whole Countries have 
become our Vaffats, without afpiring to the^ 
Ifonour of ftrrking one Blow to yield widi 
the better Grace. 

I have been in fevtria!, nay many Confe- 
Kk Fences 



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fences, and affifted at divers Comicils tf 
War, while I was in' the Poffeflion of ffie 
Inte»ddnts\ the Secretaries ofSfaSe^ and the 
Commiflarics of the Armie% and I can al^ 
. fure you on the Word of a Lowis d^Or of 
'Honour, that there has never been any one 
Thing of Moment enterprizM above ihefe 
Forty Years, the Execution . of which has 
not been entrufted to our Care and Adrefs. 

When any of our Generals have demand- 
ed any Number of Thoufands of Hbrfe or 
of Foot, for the attempting an*^ Aftion, the 
King (who loves to aft thefiireft part)wou*d 
then propof§ a like Number of Louis dVrSy 
being fufirciently convinc'd that this was 
the mofl: certain way to accomplifh his- vaft 
Defigns; and in this his Opinion, he ftill 
was feconded by his Cabinet Council^ who 
always thought it better to Buy the Town, 
than hazard Attack. 

To give you an Inftance, when the great 
Co^de^ or Tureney and a few more of that 
Charafter, (who, good Men knew no other 
Ufe of Gold, than to pay their Troops) 
would demand 2ooooFoot,and lOodoHorfe; 
the King and his Wife Council wouM add a 
a like Number of 1.(3/// J ^*0r^, as well know- 
ing that one Man might be as as good as 
another, but that no Man was fo good as 
*a Louis d^Qr^ fo that on any demand of 
Men by thefe fighting Generals, the Coun- 
cil of the King confulted how many of us 
were fit to be employed in fuch an Expedi- 

. tion 



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^ tionj if one Sum prove tooIittJe, Additions 

were mi^de^ and Succefe always attended. 

. Then did the Army take the Field, and 

the King put himfelf at the Head of them ; 

and niarchM^o a Vidlory already ajQTur'cJ, 

. ijfc^bo like Saul among the Prophets, would 

,: fay at his going away from Verfailles. / am 

^otHg to Befiege Juch a Place^ and I jbatl take 

it Juch a Daj i and this has been obferv'd 

never to fail in the Event. But to do our 

ielves Juftice, I muft declare, that neither 

his own nor his GeneraPs Conduft^ not yet 

the Bravery of his Troops couM aflure them 

fuch fignal Honour, or Subduing fo mariy 

"Wealthy I'Qwns and Provinces, but only 

we who carry with us where ever we go, 

fuch an Intrinfick Value, and fo Irrefiftibte 

a Power. 

^. But this does by no nnieans hinder all the 
appearance of a formal Siege, tho* we have 
fccur'd the Surrender, yet they draw Lines 
pf Circumvallation, Contravalatiori, raife 
Batteries, and play their Great Guns ; but 
this is only for the Honour of his Arms, arid 
ib fteal*a Gfory of Martial Prowefs.for the 
Monarch: But the fpringing the Goldea 
Mine, produces the Flags of Capitulation, 
then is the King extollM by all, as a Mart 
of wonderful Vafour, and fo enters the Place 
new taken in Triumph* 

Thus the Great LtfPis makes War his 
Diverfion, entertaining the Ladies either ia 
the Camp, or in the fine Fields of Douille^ 

:- "^ Kk 2 the 



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the Danger and the Succefs is always the 
fame. For what I have faid, I leave it to 
you to judge, whether Lewis does not in the 
niceft point deferve the Sir-nMie of Great. 

Near my little Louis dVr^y a Spanife 
Pijlole^ who, at this, broke his Silencfe. YcKi 
difcover a piece of a Gallic Affurance (faid 
he; in affuming all the Honour of theft A- 
flions to your felf, tho^ too many of us 
S^anifb Pifioles^ have had too large a fliait 
in the matter, I confefs irtdeed, that ^ 
ought to be afllam^d, and not value Our 
felves dn this Merif of Unft^bility to ag- 
grandize your Monardi and leflen our own, 
^hen by paying the Price of thofe very 
Towns which they have wreftedoAtoi our 
Hands. 

The Louis d^Or^ with a feeming Mod6fty 
and Deference, thus anfwerM, And what 
you fay Sir, is true, nor did I defign to do 
do you any Injuftice, but ftill what was 
done by both our means, muft redotihd to 
the Honour of my King, who knows fo 
perfeftly well his own Intefeft and, Advan- 
tage, is to oblige his very Enemies to Con- 
tribute to his Greatnefs. 

Truly, interrupted the Guinea^ this is an 
Honour fo peculiar to the French^ that it has 
not been namM among us yet in this Ifland; 
for to Bribe and Subborn, to deal with 
Tray tors, and Traffick. foF Towns like Joc- 
keys for Horles, is fit only for the nioft 
Bafe,. or the moft Abjed of Men j and are 

thefc 



dbyGbogk 



the T n A D n of th Cam p. 395 

. thfife then the Steps by which Lems had 
mQunted fo high as to threaten all Europe 
with the Terr^' of his Narne? The Event 
may have fince convinced him, that VU 
,£lory is not always the ^Qward of Trea- 
chery. 

My Louis A^Or^ who expefted no 
fuch Anfw^r, feemM in fome Coflfufion, 
but being usM to the Fremh-Aiv^ he foorj 
put on a little AiTjirance, and faid, I do pro- 
fcfs that there is no difference in Conqueft, 
whether it comes by Gold or by Irpn: Whe- 
ther by numerous Armies or prodigiou? 
Sums of Money ; for let Viftory be. bought 
with Cold or with Bloo4, it is certainly (till 
Viftory* 

But pray Sir, affumM the Guwea^ is this 
the way tfiat Cafar^ Scifioy and Alexander 
inade War, they difdaining thatVidory that 
was not the purchafe of Blood : They al- 
ways wouM fay that they were Generals, 
not Merchant?. Thefe were Men famous * 
IP War, and in great and mighty Con- 
quefts^thefatterns of Heroes, and the Ad- 
miration of all ; and their Method feem ex- 
tremely different from thefe you advance. ' , 

I look on them ('repJyM the Lewis d^Or) 
as great Men of their Times,when the True 
and Modern way of making War was un- 
known ; they fcarce knew Their own Origi- 
nal, much lefs the wondecful Influence that 
Gold has on the Minds of Mankind ; that 
mighty Bait was : refer v'd in ftore for the 
K k J DifcQt 



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DUcovery of the prefent Polite Age,, and 
our Lewis the Great has fo throughly ftudy'd 
Men, that he perfeftly kaoMts th^ir weak 
ficjes, and never fails to attack them in that 
pfece. Thus inftcad of (hedding whole De- 
luges of Blood, he Ipreads his Conquefts a 
itiore gentle and Humane way, by Delu- 
ges of Gold; thcfe are 'Conquefts worthy 
the mojl Chriftian ^ing. And yet I much 
wonder that Alexander fliould fo far forget 
liis Father's Wife Maxims, by which he 
ConquerM all Greece^ and fmooth'd his 
way to the Verfim Monarchy. Nor was it 
much wonder that he quitted thefe Max*- 
itns in the difference of Ancagonifts, The 
Brave one is to be Corrupted, the Cowards 
to be Beaten, Poor Men of Valour will fub- 
mit to Gold, and Rich Cewards to the 
Sword. Thus Gold Conquered Greece^ 
and Iron all Afia. 

Why, faid I, my little Louis £0r^ thou 
art not fatisfyM with taking. Towns, and 
gaining Viftories^ but puts - in as a Pane- 
gyrift for a Place among the Flatterers that 
furround thy Mafter^s Throne* 

Why truly Sir, (replyM the Piece) I am 
not alhamM of the Charafter of an Orator, 
and you Men feem to alloW it to Gold, 
when fpeaking of a more than commonly 
Eloquent Man,* you lay he has a Golden 
Tongue ; the Metaphor is juft, for ^tis taken 
from the greater Excellence, for, our Elo- 
quence do?s far furpafs yours^ There is np 

Caule 



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the T R A D E' of the C A MP. 29$ . 
Caufe fo. Bad,* that does not become Good 
in our Hands; and*no Caufe fo Good, but 
when we are againft it fball appear Bad. 
It is our TaHent to Conquer ; and even 
Time^ that grave Deftroyer of all things,; 
has no Dominion over us ; for a Louis d*Or 
that has been rambling throughout, the 
World, e're fince the time of Lems XIII. is 
as capable pf Undertaking any confiderable 
A^ion, as any one that received the Stamp 
but Yefterday, fo little does fhe impair our 
Virtue and Force. Thou art,my little Piece, 
a moft profound Cafuift, faid I. No,that Ta- 
lent we leave to your Men(reply'd he fmartr 
iy) for Words are your Province, but A- 
Vftions is ours, and I might therefore fitly 
apply the Words of Jjax and Vljjfes to my, 
ftif. 

-Qumtum ego Marte feroee 



Jnque Acie valeoytantufn •valet ijielofuendo. 
As much as I in Martial Deeds prevail, 
. So much does he in a fine varnifh'd Talq, 

I wonder that the World fliould fo much 
Reproach Lewis It Grand (who fo well 
knew his own Intcreft) f©r making ufe of 
that Metal which commands ' the World, 
andis itfelf the Bulwat-k of Kingdoms;, and 
the darling Objea of all Mens Defires; 
this Metal he has at his Command, an4 
with this he compafles liis valt and Noble 
' . Kk 4 Defigns," 



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25^ 1^ G 6 LD BN SpYji (?r, 

'Dedans, and which when that jf^ih, tnnj^ 
alfo tail. I will add biK one Worcjl mpr? 
on hkn, and that is, that he fecmsby Fat« 
defign'd to command the whole World^ 
frnce by his Policy he has already got Pof-. 
ftflion of the New, which furnii^es hiqai 
with Geld to make War in the Old ; Nay, 
*his wliole Reign 'till thosprefent, l>as beeq 
an Jge of Gold. 

But faid the lulUn Crorvn^ tlie Golden 
Age was fucceeded by the Silver Age, andi 
that by the Brazen and Iron Ages; and 
then Lervis has out-livM the Three for- 
mer, and has now no more Gold to difpofe 
on his feveral Occafions about this part of 
the World as he wasi wont. So that whilft 
his Soldiers have noth'mg but Ruft, he hira* 
felf muft fubmit to the Conqueft of the I- 
ron of his Enemies. Witnefs his Unfuc- 
cefsful Campaigns, and whilft his Foes are 
making vigorous Preparations for War he 
* is fain to fend his Plenipotentiaries to fue 
for a Peace. 
* You give we the Spleen ({aid the little 
Louis d^Ors) to hear you fpeak thus without 
Reflection, I confefs that we are now in the 
Enemies hands, but then as I told you, we 
are Invulnerable and immortal, whilft a 
General or other Officer taken, muft be a 
Prifoner till Ranfom'd, or we are at |iber* 
ty, and may pafs back again into our Old 
-Mafters Hands; and when that comes to 
pafs, you may be fure we fhall again gain 
I him 



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the T^^Df ^ th €amp. j^5^j 
him rf^is wonted Succ^fs ; a,n4 r^rieve s^ll 
tbofeLoiTes which npw apppap i^i confer- 
able. But fiace the Golden Ag? is npw rip 
more (l^id the Gi^i^f^) and the Irpi| Age 
bears all the fway, whjr doe^ not h^ 
make ufe of this Metal to perpetuate the 
Conquefts that his Gojd h^d obtained there^^ 
and make at leaft a Vertuc of NeceiTity, 
and at laft dr^w the Sword when his Purf« 
will no longer anfMfer his Demands? QiiP 
Generals would think the Hiftory o\ their 
Aftions would make but a dark Figure, ig 
any of them were owing to fo Mef^enarya_ 
Metal ; but take the Field after we are fenc 
qway with the Baggage, admitting with a 

tricvous Difdain of all other Help but tl^ir^ 
words, whilft pn the contrary, your King 
is coming to his Army when his Golden 
Bridge has fecqr'd his Paflage. 

That (faid the Louis cPOrs) was always 

thought the furcfl:, and moft fubtil Arc of 

making War; Phiiip the Father of the great 

AU:i(i^nder^ an^ Pattern of my Matter, as I 

have obfervM, usM to fay that tliere was no 

Fortrefs impregnable, if there was a way foe 

an Als los^dpn with Gold- to get Entrance. 

Private Men asf. weU as Monarchs, make ufe 

of the moft probable means of Sucgefs, an4 

both havefounc^ Gold to be the fureft means.. 

I agree with you (faid the Gutm^i that 

no Prince ever had a greater Regard to his 

own Intereft ; for to advance that lie has 

never (cruprdto facrifke all things that were 

Sacred 



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a^& TA^ Golden Spt, e?r; 
Sacred or Dear to Man ; but to efteem this 
an Honourable Caufe is what I can never 
fubfcribe to. 

It is as Humour's in Fafbion (replyMthe 
Louis (POr) every one has his own Fancy 
and Notion. And as FM^r# i^ the Foun- 
tain of Fajbionsj and Cookery, fo I think 
her Right has not been difputed in fetting 
the Standard of both with the well-bred fine 
Gentlemen ; the fame will hpld of what is 
Jionourable and Diflionourable, at leaft 
by the Pradice of the Beau Mond. 
Here are no Honours fo diftinguifh'd as 
thofe we have pradifed ; and if the Honours 
oi Lewis k Grand are now in Decay, it is be- 
caufe we have left his Dominions . 

That is to fay, affumM the Guinea^ that 
he has no Honour left, in the favour of 
your Monarch, ,1 prefumc to deny, and af- 
firm that hfc has now as much Honour as e- 
Vfer he was Mafter of. 

Be not fo hard, faid the Louis d^Ory on' 
our great King, who has ever paid dear e- 
nough for his Purchafe. But I muft again 
. fay that nothing is more glorious than to fee 
him take Towns, "and pver-run Countries, 
, with little more force than what he defirM 
from his Louis tPOrs. You know that Phi- 
tif the 2d. Boaiied, that he commanded the 
World, and made his Enemies trcmble 
without going out of his Clofer, This may 
properly be faid of Letvis le Qrand^ fince 

■ '- withodt 



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thcTviAV^ of the Camp. 299 
M^ithout ftirring from /^<?r^ he has aci- 
ccmplilh'cl thefe Warlike Defigns, which 
have frightenM all Eurofe:, and I call itglp- 
rious to gain Battles and. Towns with an 
Inftrument fo mean. For th6 weaker the 
Means, the more Honourable the Exploit- 
But fiace we havecotred fo far into this 
Argument, let us examine which Conduft 
is moft agreeable to Reafon. Your Generals 
you fay,know no way toConqueft but by the 
Sword ; and where is then the Wonder, that 
at the Head of Brave^pd Vigorous Troops 
y iftory fhould attend them. No Man ever 
doubted ihe Valour of Gujlavm Adolphus , 
who accompliftiM fo many Glorious Ani- 
ons, and great Things by meer force of his 
Army. The Kings of the North know no 
Qcher way , i)or have it in their Power to 
try any other. While we call this a Gigan* 
tick way of making War. 

3ut the Viftories of Lewis le Grand are fo 
JEntgma^ which the beft Hiftqrians, orPo-r 
leticians arc not capable of explaining. The 
terriblp EfFefts of his Power are e'ery Day 
felt, but the Fountain from whence they - 
fpring, has been always a Secret. You 
daily hear of Forts, Towns and Cities 
Subdu'd, but could never difcover the 
Hand that did the Work. This is truly 
tnore than Humane Wit. 

But I will let you know how he became 
IAa^^^ o/i Strasbourg^ the Capital of all Al- 
facey a fiace \yhich other Princes would 

have 



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50O thi Trade of $hi Cam- p. 

have reckonM worthy a Campaign, whicb 
yet we took without the lois of 6ne Man's 
life, or ft) much as a Wo*nd, but a world 
of good Louis d^Ors were buryM in the 
Town. 

The King difpatches away bk iaitbfui 
Lowvois^ and only our Servant, he finds the 
<thief Burger- mafterV Coach ready to re* 
ceive him without the Gates,' wbilft he k 
carryM to the Burger-mafter's Houfe; be. 
fends his Man out under pretence of buying 
up Horfes: The Burger-mafter's Family 
being got out of the way, he Affembled the 
reft ofthe Magiftrates, and in the Midftof 
them, Mr. Lovois opens the Cafe, pro- 
duces alfo very large Promifes, extolling the 
great Rewards his Mafter was preparing 
K)r them, in cpnfideration ofthe Affair they 
then met about, and as an Earneft of it pre- 
fented each of them with a Thoufand Louis 
iPOrsj adding that his Mafter was not Rich 
enough to re€[uile fo great a piece of Ser- 
vice to the height of the Merit, but affurM 
them they had engagM with a Prinae who 
■ would always be liberal of his Favours to 
them, and Hqnour them with^his Efteem, 
as iris beft Friends and Allies. 

At the Second Conference ic was. agreed, 
that the Firft or Chief Burger-mafter fhou-d . 
have a Prefent of Four hundred Thoufand 
Louis a^Ors ; and every other Magiftrate of 
the Cabal fhould l^avc Three Hundred 
Thoufand i on the Payment of which the- 

JCeys 



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Keys df the Ciiyfhairld be^ delivered mro 
fais ihndSf and that it Qiaaldjorevet after 
be tiibatary to Fram^^ and t^at the PubH- 
tatkm {hoti]d bb made dn the ct^di. of O^. 
fcr t^t. The Khig waV pundual to lin 
Agreement, andenterMtlie Ibw^oii the 
Vtry ftme Day. 

lihatl next infofni you how yre got tfa« 
King the Maftery of Caza/^, a pkceof fiicR 
Irnportahcethat I need not enforce \u I had 
a Relation of that iFad: frokn a Piece diet 
Wai fent.on thit very Expedition* 

Tht Marquis tP L<?»i«ftf, whofe . _ 

iiead Wias always at Niirdrk , &nd ^fSS* 
had fttet withfuch Succefs fo lately ^^'*^- 
In die Affair of Sfrasharg^, let «h» Duke di 
MtnVu» know that if he would fefl Cb^ 
10 hfe Maftei-, he would J)ay hihixtewn fcwo 
Millions of Livers ht it; a mighty thin^ 
in tlie Pocfccit of fd Pbor a Prince as Mantua, : 
Therefcxie tft his Aniweiv he acquainted hink 
that this l^ropofal was liot diiagtteabie t6 
hirti. "nie Fatigtfe thu Layoff had lately , 
sEirid alio in his Journey to arid from Strtts>- 
boarghy had difabled him frortl undertaking 
that Journey ; he tterefore advifed the King 
to msike ufe 6f Mr* Colbert-, who fcav«ing 
received his laft lofttuftions, (h out with 
all billigence for C*Jall\ • who, as foon as he 
arriv'd had a Private Conference widi the 
Duke. Then by Misfortune, drawing out 
foine Papers ft'om his Pocket, he dropc one 
of his Memoirs, iil^hiehfee hidkiftrufti- 

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^02 i9Je. i» o I- u A *^ 

ens t6 go as hr as Four Millioos ^ leaviog 
other little Affairs to bis own Mar^emeiHi. 
This Paper, *onc of the Duke^s Pages find- 
ings brought to his Mailer. But Mr, CQlbirt^ 
coming among others the ile^t day tq his Ur 
vff, the fame Page with abundance of Ad- 
drefe, convey 'd it again into his f ocket with- 
out being perceived. The Duke feeming to 
know nothing of his Inftrudions, told him 
thaitlie could not part with a Place of thatlro- 
portance for leis than Four Millions. Mr. CejA 
bert was furprized to find the Puke in a 
Mind different from what he feetfted the laft 
Nighty but diflembling his Inflruflions, told 
him, That he could not exceed what had 
been btefbre ptofFer'dj but yet rather than 
leave his Court re infeSla^ be would venture^ 
on his, own hazard, tp exceed his Commii- 
iion {ovaz Hundred Thoufand pf,i./i^fr/-. It 
was at laft agreed, That the Duke Ihould 
have his Advance of 500000 jL/^^rri, and a 
Yearly Pcnfion 01 200000. This, Poor 
Prince being thus caught, be SignMthe 
Contraft of Sale , and Mr. Colbert return'id! 
to Court in left than fix Weeks. Tliis waa 
the Prelude to that Prince's Mifery. . 

In this manner, faidthe LouUJi^Or^ doe^ 
our great Monarch accomplifh his Defignsj 
and yet you will not allow his ConduQ Hcn 
riourable and Juft, tho' you cannot deny thai 
there is nothing more Lawfully got , thai 
when we Purchafe with our Money. 
I do aver J reply M the Guinea^ that thai 

verjj 



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"** the T 11 A 1? E (f^^he C a M P. j6} 

^^eriTMaxim will not geperajiy bold goodjf as rtacB-^; 
iflg nb farther (hao cbe Bargains ol private Mei|J 
Bat in Matters of State^ a, Man of Honour vpuld 
Blnlh at it, and rather expofe his Life in Honoura- 
ble Conqueft, thanfteaia Town^ a Province by » 
Bribe to a Prince, who has no Right to fell if. 

Tho* I think yqur AfTcrtion, (aid the ia«/irf^Qr, 
will, not hold good, yet to pafs over that Siibjed, 
J will proceed to the Relation of another Adion,' 
which no lefs tends to the rendrlug his, Name Imj^ 
mottal^ and that is, the Conqueft of his own Sab*, 
jeds; and tbofeof Millions of Souls which he has 
Converted to the Catholick Faith^ in which we alio 
have aded no inconfiderable Parr. 

Then I find, faid I, that thou art a MifTionary,. 
as well as a Soldier, and Statcfman,/, Pray^ kc flic 
then hear what Supcefs you have had in this Apo^ 
ftolical Fundioo. 

Is it poffit^le, faid be, that you can be Ignorant 
of that which ail the World knows ^ready fi> 
well? 

I know very well, interrupted the Qgiaea, who 
could not be (ilent on this occafron ) ttmt Lewis 
XtV. has routed ttieProteftams out of Franccy aoid 
that Dragoons weife the villanous Inftrufuents of 
that Work , efFcaed by Fire and Sword. By 
which the Dragoons made more Converts in one 
Week, than their Bifhops and Prelates cou|d do 
all their Lives. But I mufl: own that I am quite 
Ignorant of what part you couM liave in that 
Weighty Affair. 

I expcaed no left , faid the Louis JPOr » I fee 
you are prepQfTefs'd with that^ Falfe Notion^ i^ 
well as others, of attributing all his Succeis to the 
.Fjiry.of hi$ Atn$ ^ when, we alone defer ve ail the 
Praife. In this I already open'd your Eyes as to hia 
Secular Conqueits , now I am to aflure you, that 
thofe likewife which are Spiritual derive ^H their 
Glory from us^, . W^ 



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Was Ihi your place^ VM the GumOj 1 (hmSA 
^ly fbrrtndtT Af (httt to tbeI)r^:i^r|%ho fecm 
fitter Ittftrudtcnh of k wdrk of tbis Kitert tiita 

Why, fiid the i^^ JPDr. ifa a kina t^ heilt^ is 
the Cpntcrfioh of Two MiDions of Sbtih to be 
paft oTcr in filcnce? WHcfa can't bfc icJyilM in 
Hiftorjr, even fincc the Days of the Apbftles ; nay, 
I may fay^ that this ercceds aB they diU If they 
€6nvertcd many Nations, fl #as by lEf^hge tnd 
wonderful Mfiades, Preaching, add thfe Holy 
Spirit i but here was hot fo mirch ia^ bn^ Miracle 
performed, nor the Icaft prctchde &f havit% ihc 
Gift of the Holy Ghoft. / And 0hc% tfefefe ftr^ftge 
things are bronght abont l>y onr mcans^ *rhy tbonld 
We rehife the Glory we defetVe. 

But weinfn^l^mi, (£d the Guinea^ bietngqtiice 
Ignorant of tbefe Things, I hope yon WHl partfon 
onr Onnbcs. And t thinlc thai Corri^tbn is a 
kfs ercDfe for defending an Opinion tmin Fatne. 

The Dilpote is not of that, laid the Jjouts dX)r^ 
Whether it be more or lefs CatpaUe, bttt let it be 
ttken as it wiD, it makes our En(]^ry of equal 
extent i and fidce Men^ Confcienigtt are n6t ^oof 
^gainft bur Power, it pMnly fdliOv^^ fbttfloching 
«lfe is. 

Inefild:, Gemtttmen, fald I, to fmtan end to 
itie Difpute , you are the Darlings of the Age, 
ybdr Empire is orer all, and you are the ArUtta- 
tora of War ^ Peace \ but to the Shame of thofe 
who advanced yon to that Power be it (l^ken. It 
is theScaddal of Lewis k Grand^ to hatre Caade fo 
Bretal an Ufe of yon ; as well as of the Popifh 
iCfaorch, to coinmit fo many Sacriltdges by ^o«r 
infeans. And a Reproach to Mankind tbptoftiirace 
ftftnfelf to your Charms. 

Ycl iince there can be bo Inttltigettt^ iil^ wt^t 
Yott can give, I Ihall take care often to Confuli flfy 
eOLDEr5 SPY. FIN^S, 



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